A Life of Enjoying Love

Everyone wants to enter into the joy of love. That is what enjoy means, it means to enter into the joy of something. However, few people really know how to enter into the joy of love. Love is the most basic need of a person’s soul, that is, to love and be loved. When a person is loved then they thrive spiritually, emotionally and physically. God made everyone to be loved and to love others.

We have come to know and have believed the love which God has for us. God is love, and the one who abides in love abides in God, and God abides in him. I John 4:16

Love must first be received by one person to be given to others. We love because we have first been loved. The source of all love is God and God expressed His love to the world by giving His Son, Jesus Christ.

For God so loved the world, that He gave His only begotten Son, that whoever believes in Him shall not perish, but have eternal life. John 3:16

When we believe in God’s love for us by believing in Jesus Christ then we receive the gift of God’s love into our heart. God is love and when we abide in love then we will abide in God and God abides in us. Abide means to live within, so therefore, we will live in God’s love and His love will live in and through us when we believe in Jesus Christ. Jesus Christ is perfect love. His love is perfect towards us and His love is perfected in us when we love each other.

No one has seen God at any time; if we love one another, God abides in us, and His love is perfected in us. I John 4:12

When we abide in God then we learn to love with a Godlike love, which is pure, good, unselfish, patient, kind, true, bears all things, believes the best, forgiving and enduring. God’s love will never fail. God’s love is only possible for the one who receives this Godlike love through believing and receiving God into their life through Jesus Christ. God’s love is an unconditional love that is not based on the recipient of the love but comes from the one who loves. God loves because God is love and He wants to teach His children, who are called Christians or Christ-followers, how to love with this kind of love.

Beloved, let us love one another, for love is from God; and everyone who loves is born of God and knows God. I John 4:7

It is only to the degree that we have experienced God’s love that we can love another. The depth of our love for another is determined by the depth of our knowledge of the love of God. The one who does not love does not know God, for God is love.

The one who does not love does not know God, for God is love. I John 4:8

We can love God and others because God first loved us.

We love, because He first loved us. I John 4:19

God’s love is expressed to us through Jesus Christ dying for our sins. He took the punishment which we deserved and paid for our sins through dying on the cross in order that He might restore us to a love relationship with God.

For Christ also died for sins once for all, the just for the unjust, so that He might bring us to God, I Peter 3:18a

God, the Father, raised Jesus Christ from the dead and Jesus Christ is alive today. He who believes this and calls on the name of Jesus Christ to save them from their sins can come into a love relationship with God.

See how great a love the Father has bestowed on us, that we would be called children of God; and such we are. I John 3:1a

When a person receives God’s love then He also has his heart cleansed from a guilty conscience. It is a guilty conscience that prevents us from entering into the love of God. It is a guilty conscience that prevents us from experiencing the love of others. It is a guilty conscience that keeps us from being able to love others.

let us draw near with a sincere heart in full assurance of faith, having our hearts sprinkled clean from an evil conscience… Hebrews 10:22a

Once our hearts have been cleansed from a guilty and evil conscience then we can draw near to God and experience His love and comfort. As we learn to fellowship with God and spend time in God’s Word and prayer, our hearts are continually cleansed as we confess our sins to Him, so that we might have a clear conscience with God.

If we confess our sins, He is faithful and righteous to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness. I John 1:9

In the same way, we must have a clear conscience with others. If we have not loved someone else and have sinned against them then we need to ask their forgiveness.

Therefore if you are presenting your offering at the altar, and there remember that your brother has something against you, leave your offering there before the altar and go; first be reconciled to your brother, and then come and present your offering. Matthew 5:23,24

You can not worship the Lord with a clear conscience if you do not have a clear conscience with others. Your worship of the Lord is an expression of love and devotion to Him. You can not love God if you have not loved others. Your love for others is an expression of your love for God.

for the one who does not love his brother whom he has seen, cannot love God whom he has not seen. I John 4:20b

There are three requirements for entering into the joy of loving others. We need a pure heart with a good conscience and a sincere faith to love and enjoy love. When these are in our lives then others will see the love of God in us.

But the goal of our instruction is love from a pure heart and a good conscience and a sincere faith. I Timothy 1:5

God’s love is so amazing, satisfying and fulfilling. There is none to compare with Him. God’s love is what changes a person, a marriage, a family, a neighborhood, a town, a city , a nation and the world. God’s love began with God and was expressed through the giving of His Son, Jesus Christ, and His love is alive in the lives of His followers who belong to Him.

Beloved, if our heart does not condemn us, we have confidence before God; and whatever we ask we receive from Him, because we keep His commandments and do the things that are pleasing in His sight. This is His commandment, that we believe in the name of His Son Jesus Christ, and love one another, just as He commanded us. I John 3:21-23

A Life that Understands that Your Husband is a King

Understanding God’s Design for a Man to Be a King

The Lord made every man to be a king. A king is a ruler and God made men to conquer and rule. A man needs a queen to share in his kingdom. The most important decision that a man makes, other than where he will spend eternity, is who will be his queen. An excellent wife is the crown of her husband. If he chooses an excellent wife then he will have far more advantages in life to conquer and rule. An excellent wife will be a wife that he can trust. She will only do him good and will not cause him grief. She will have his best interests in her mind and do what is right. She will give him honor. An excellent wife will not seek to get her own way but she will seek to do her husband’s will. She will not manipulate him or keep secrets from him, such as, how she spends money, where she goes and who she talks to. She will not talk about his struggles, weaknesses or faults with other women (not even with her mother). She will not correspond with other men. Her husband will be able to trust her completely and he will be able to delegate responsibilities to her. He will listen to her advice for she will have his best interests at heart and not have ulterior self-seeking motives. She will understand that a children’s glory is their father and she will teach their children to honor their father and she will not ever criticize him to their children. She will not ever say, “don’t tell your father”. If there is a question as to what to do, then she will say, “let us ask your father” and if he is not available then she will know her husband well enough to know what he would want them to do. An excellent wife will recognize her husband’s right to rule.

An excellent wife is the crown of her husband, Proverbs 12:4

Understanding How a Man Becomes a King

A man first learns to rule well by ruling his wife. This is not a bad thing but it is a good thing because it is her protection. She was deceived in the garden by the Serpent’s beauty and charm. She is still easily deceived. God made husband and wife to be joint rulers and she is also a ruler but her husband rules over her. God rules over the husband. If she will trust God then she can learn to trust God through her husband. The Lord will protect her from harm if she will trust the Lord. The Lord’s provision for protection for females is first their father and then their husband. They must stay under their God given authority. If they get out from or go against their God given authority then it is only a matter of time before they will be violated. After a man rules his wife then he rules his children. An excellent wife helps him to be king in their home. She teaches her children to obey their father, not only through her words, but through her example. When a man rules well in his household then he believes he can conquer in the world. He can face each day with confidence.

To the woman He said,
“I will greatly multiply
Your pain in childbirth,
In pain you will bring forth children;
Yet your desire will be for your husband,
And he will rule over you.” Genesis 3:16

Men are very different from women, not only physically, but psychologically. When a man is pleased with a woman then he will give up to half of his kingdom. He wants a queen who will share in his glory. He is looking for a trustworthy woman to love and one whom can give himself to and all that he has. If you become that excellent wife then you will have no regrets. Your husband and children will praise you and your works will praise you also. You will be a success and your husband will be a success also.

Her children rise up and bless her;
Her husband also, and he praises her, saying:
“Many daughters have done nobly,
But you excel them all.”
Charm is deceitful and beauty is vain,
But a woman who fears the Lord, she shall be praised.
Give her the product of her hands,
And let her works praise her in the gates. Proverbs 31:28-31

A Life Understanding How to Know the One for You

Understand How to Recognize the Man Who Is for You

“How do I know if someone is the one for me?” is a common question. That question is asked usually before a person meets the one for them because most people “know” when they meet the one for them. Before you meet the “one” for you, you will probably meet many who you will know are not the one for you. You and your future mate will be a good fit for one another. The man will be the initiator and the woman will be the responder. The man must take responsibility for the relationship and be the leader. Every woman longs for a man to be a leader but she must be willing to follow the man who will be the head of their home. If she does not respect the man and is not willing to follow the man then he is not the one for her. A woman must learn to be patient and wait for the man to initiate.

Understand The Importance of Trusting the Lord

The Lord tells us not to lean on our own understanding. We often think that there are certain things that we want in a man but most of what we think is important before marriage is not what matters as much after marriage. How a man treats his wife is the highest after marriage and how good looking he is goes down the list. Trust in the Lord with all of your heart. Go to Scripture and research what the Lord says about a loving and kind man who would be a good husband. Unless someone has received God’s unconditional love then they will never be able to love someone else with an unconditional love. The greatest need of a wife is to be loved.

I know that everything God does will remain forever; there is nothing to add to it and there is nothing to take from it, for God has so worked that men should fear Him. Ecclesiastes 3:14

You will know when you meet the man for you because there will be nothing to add to him and nothing to take from him. It will not mean that he is perfect but it will mean that you will not say, “I really like him but…”. If there are any “buts” then whatever it is that makes you hesitant will come back to bother you later. Also, does your father like him and want you to marry him? A father can see aspects of a man that a young woman can not see. Do not marry a man if you have doubts. Wait. It is too big of a decision to go into with doubts.

A Life Understanding that A Man’s Love is a Gift

A man’s love for a woman is a gift.  When a man is asking a woman to marry him then he is offering himself to her to love her and to husband her. The word “husband” is a nurturing and caring term. The husband is to care for, provide for, protect and love his wife for better or for worse in the good days and not so good days. He is giving himself to her for her well being and to do her good all the days of his life. Love is a gift that is given to another. It is the highest and best gift. To love someone is the greatest honor and no one is worthy of the gift of love from another.

Understand that a Woman Must Not Manipulate

A woman longs for the attention and love of a man and often she will be tempted to “take it into her hands” to get what she wants. If she manipulates to get what she wants then she is only cheating herself of a gift of love. She will never know “for sure” if the man she “caught” is the man that the Lord wanted to give her. The Lord wants to give her to the man and when she manipulates then she will not have the assurance that the Lord brought her to her husband. When Adam needed a wife, the Lord brought her to Adam. The Lord gave Eve to Adam. The Lord still wants to give a wife to a man. It is crucial to know for sure that the Lord is the One who brought two people together because there will always be trying days in any marriage and there is great comfort in knowing that what God has joined together that He will keep together if they look to Him.

What therefore God has joined together, let no man separate. Mark 10:9

A wife is a favor that the Lord gives to a man. She is his greatest treasure and when he receives his wife he is receiving a gift from the Lord. The Lord is perfect in all His ways and you will be forever grateful to the Lord if you trust Him to bring you and your mate together. If you manipulate in a relationship, then later on you will be tempted to doubt and may wonder if you did not bring it about, rather than trust the Lord. Manipulation is selfish and deceitful and is not pleasing to the Lord. Manipulation is not living by faith and trusting the Lord. Trust Him and you will not be disappointed. The Lord is good. He wants a wife to be a gift to the man. Let your husband find you.

           He who finds a wife finds a good thing and obtains favor from the Lord. Proverbs 18:22

A Life Understanding that Love is a Gift

God’s design for mankind is love. His plan for all people is that they are to know and live in God’s love and they are to love one another. Love is a gift to some one else. Love can not be earned through works. If one has to work to get something then it is not a gift. Love is a choice for the giver of love and love is a gift to the receiver of love. The receiver must choose to respond and receive the gift of love. Love can be accepted and it can be rejected. The one who loves must have the gift to be able to give it away. Love is a power for good towards another and there is only One who is the source of all power and all love and that is God. God is love. God created man for man to be loved and to love. God created and chose Adam and Eve to receive His gift of love. Love is relational. Adam and Eve rejected God’s gift of love and rejected their relationship with God. Love has boundaries and when Adam and Eve would not accept God’s boundaries then they no longer were able to live in God’s love for them as He designed. Life and love has boundaries for the good of all. Parents set boundaries for their children, if they love them. When we reject God’s boundaries then we reject His love and what is good for us and we choose grief. Grief brings sorrow, pain, sadness, depression and anger.

The foolishness of man ruins his way, And his heart rages against the Lord. Proverbs 19:3

Understand Life without Love

Only a fool would reject God’s love and yet the Bible says that because of Adam and Eve’s foolish decision to reject God that we all come into the world with a foolish heart. The Bible says that what a fool does is stupid. Every stupid decision that anyone ever makes is because they did not go to the Lord and seek His counsel. They acted on their own and did what they wanted to do. God never causes grief. We only bring it on ourselves. Drugs and therapy can not take away our grief, depression, anger, etc. It is not until we are changed from the inside will we ever be free of the things that cause destruction within us. Only God can change us on the inside. Only God can set us free.

Therefore if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creature; the old things passed away; behold, new things have come. II Corinthians 5:17

All of us have messed up in life. There is not a single person that has done life right except for Jesus Christ. He did life right because He is God and He came to love us, to forgive us, to clean up our messes, to restore us and to live through us. He not only teaches us the right way to live so that we can live in His love and be happy but He actually comes and lives within us through the power of His Holy Spirit. He makes us a new person and the old things pass away. There is only one way to be restored to God’s love and that is through Jesus Christ. Each one of us must receive Jesus Christ into our life to be our Lord and Savior.

But as many as received Him, to them He gave the right to become children of God, even to those who believe in His name, John 1:12

A Life Understanding A Man Needs to Be Wanted

Understanding that a Husband Wants to Be Wanted

When Adam saw Eve he was ecstatic. He wanted her and he wanted her to be his alone. When a man gets married to the girl he loves he thinks, “she is mine”.  A man thinks that when a girl marries him that she wants him. It is devastating to a man to feel rejected. A man wants his wife to desire him and not just love him the way she wants to be loved. A wife longs to “feel” loved and the words “I love you” are important to her and in a similar way, the words “I want you” are what a husband longs to hear. Just as a wife does not just want to “hear” those words, “I love you” but she wants to “see” that love also, in the same way a husband wants to “see” that his wife wants him. He married his wife because he thought that she wanted him.

so that they may encourage the young women to love their husbands, Titus 2:4a

Understand How to Want Your Husband

Understand that what is right before marriage is wrong after marriage. It is right to withhold the physical intimacy before marriage and a man needs for the woman that he loves to have a high standard morally before marriage. A man appreciates what he works for and what he waits for so it is good for his girlfriend/fiance to help keep the relationship where it needs to be. However, after marriage it is wrong for the wife to withhold physical intimacy from her husband. If he is sensitive to her then he will be patient when she is not feeling well and he also needs to restrain himself during her time of month. However, his desire is usually very much greater than her desire for the physical and he needs for her to want him and not reject his affections toward her. She will be much happier if she satisfies him when she is more agreeable and this will keep him fulfilled in the area of the physical. Most men are agreeable anytime so this is not hard for the wife to do. The Bible teaches that the older women are to teach the younger women to “love” their husbands. The word love in this verse in the original means that she is to be a “lover of her husband” or in other words, in the original it means that she is to want him and delight in him.

Let your fountain be blessed,
And rejoice in the wife of your youth.
As a loving hind and a graceful doe,
Let her breasts satisfy you at all times;
Be exhilarated always with her love. Proverbs 5:18,19

Understand that a husband needs physical intimacy and God’s provision for a man is his wife. You married your husband and he believed that you wanted him when you married him. He needs you. There is not another woman in the world that can do what you can do for your husband. It may be sex with another woman but it is meant to be so much more with a man’s wife. It is the cherry on top and icing on the cake, so to speak. It is becoming one with another and it is the fullest expression of love. When you satisfy your husband you will also diminish the temptation of the adulteress woman who has her eye on your husband. There are many women who are looking for the vulnerable man and you don’t want that man to be your husband. Let him have something to look forward to when he comes home and when you are together. You will find that as you fulfill your role as a wife that you will be blessed. When a man is satisfied and fulfilled by the woman he loves there is not anything that he will not do to make her happy. He loves her and her joy becomes his joy.

The husband must fulfill his duty to his wife, and likewise also the wife to her husband. The wife does not have authority over her own body, but the husband does; and likewise also the husband does not have authority over his own body, but the wife does. Stop depriving one another, except by agreement for a time, so that you may devote yourselves to prayer, and come together again so that Satan will not tempt you because of your lack of self-control. I Corinthians 7:3-5

A Life Understanding Brokenness and Healing

Understanding Brokenness

Broken relationships can cause people to be broken. The Lord never intended that there would ever be divorce, remarriage, unfaithfulness and everything else that causes pain to others and especially to children. When divorce happens it brings grief to the children. The Lord says that He hates divorce because of what it does to the children. However, unless there is healing then the chances are slim that a child of divorce will have a happy marriage. Wounds and hurts happen but there is hope and there can be healing. It is important that as much as possible each person goes into the marriage whole and healthy emotionally. The Lord can and wants to heal but a person with internal hurts must go to the Lord for healing. He understands each person better than anyone else and His name Jehovah-Rapha means “The God who Heals”. You will not hurt forever if you are healed. There will be a scar but you will know when you are healed because when something or someone touches where the wound was then you do not feel the pain, just as if you were to have a wound on your body that has healed. The scar is there but not the pain when the wound has healed. Not only does the Lord heal but He also can break the cycle of sin for the person who turns to Him. The Lord is real and His kindness is a realty to those who look to Him. Not only does He heal and break the cycle but He says that He can restore the “years that the locusts have eaten”. In other words, He can restore what was destroyed. Only God can do this and man can not fix our messes. When man tries to fix messes then he only makes a bigger mess. The Lord makes all things right and He alone teaches us the right way to live and love so that we do not bring on ourselves more pain or give to our children the same sort of grief as we experienced.

“Yield now and be at peace with Him;
Thereby good will come to you.
“Please receive instruction from His mouth
And establish His words in your heart.
“If you return to the Almighty, you will be restored;
If you remove unrighteousness far from your tent,
And place your gold in the dust,
And the gold of Ophir among the stones of the brooks,
Then the Almighty will be your gold
And choice silver to you.
“For then you will delight in the Almighty
And lift up your face to God.
“You will pray to Him, and He will hear you;
And you will pay your vows. Job 22:21-27

Understanding Healing and Restoration

Yahweh El Ashiyb is the name of God that means “The Lord My Restorer”. Healing and restoration comes when we yield ourselves completely to Him. Good will come to us when we receive His instruction and establish His Words in our heart. If we return to Him then we will be restored. Repentance means turning from our sinful ways and whatever our idols were and turning to the Lord. (We often turn to other means for comfort rather than the Lord and whereby they do not help us but they ensnare us…and they can also become idols that we do not want to let go.) He will become more precious to us than anything we desired before because we will see Him and we will experience His mercy and His peace. He will hear our prayers and we will keep our vows. You will know much joy and gladness when you are restored. Sorrow and sadness will leave along with regret and depression.He restores my soul; He guides me in the paths of righteousness For His name’s sake. Psalm 23:3 Everyone needs healing at some time in their lives. When you give your life to the Lord and He becomes your Lord and Savior then you will never walk alone again. He will go with you through your sorrow. He will comfort you in your pain and He will restore you. There is no situation greater than the Lord. Nothing is too difficult for Him. He is able to save and He is able to restore. He loves you. And looking at them Jesus said to them, “With people this is impossible, but with God all things are possible.” Matthew 19:26 Your past does not have to define you nor does your present pain have to determine your future happiness.

A Life Understanding Great Relationships

Understanding What Characterizes Great Relationships

Your happiness in life is directly proportional to the greatness of your relationships. There are four things that will characterize your life when you are satisfied and in right relationships. These four things are joy, gladness, thanksgiving and you will want to express the happiness in your heart through song. We all have different degrees of intimacy in our relationships which is according to the relationship. However, love and peace are what will characterize all of your relationships when they are right.

Joy and gladness will be found in her,
Thanksgiving and sound of a melody. Isaiah 51:3b

Understanding the Levels of Great Relationships

Relationships are privileges that are given to us. The first relationship that needs to be in order is a person’s relationship with God. Jesus Christ came to bring love and peace on earth to those who are in a right relationship with God. Relationships go from greater to lesser degrees of intimacy. God knows everything and is intimately acquainted with all of our ways. Nothing is hidden from Him. The next relationship, if you are married, is your relationship with your spouse. Our spouse is the next level and our spouse knows us (or should know us) better than any other human. The greatest level of love and trust should be with a spouse and it is the only relationship where you are one in body, soul and spirit, or at least should be. The next level is family relationships. The next level is friendships. The next level is neighbors and acquaintances. The last level of relationships is enemies.When a man’s ways are pleasing to the Lord, He makes even his enemies to be at peace with him. Proverbs 16:7 If you want to have a great marriage and if you do, life is amazingly wonderful with a great marriage. A great marriage is a taste of heaven on earth and truly the most satisfying of all relationships. However, when you get married then you take all of your other relationships into that marriage. You take all of your baggage from past relationships with you. Oftentimes we do not realize all of the baggage that we have from our past relationships until it starts to make itself known in our marriage. The best thing you can do to have a great marriage is to be restored, if possible, and healed from past relationships. Relationships are difficult because they can cause hurts. When we are young we do not choose who most of our relationships are with and have no control over the hurt that happens. However, we may not be able to control what happens to us but we can control our responses. It is not what happens to us but our response to what happens that determines the destruction in our lives. Being hurt from people can bring anger or bitterness. If we are not healed then the anger or bitterness will come out in our relationships with others. Jesus Christ is the Great Healer. If you will go to Him then He can and wants to heal you. Spiritually and emotionally healthy people have healthy relationships. Pursue peace with all men, and the sanctification without which no one will see the Lord. See to it that no one comes short of the grace of God; that no root of bitterness springing up causes trouble, and by it many be defiled; Hebrews 12:14,15

A Life that Understands the Cost of a Great Marriage

It is understandable that some people do not like what is being written in these posts. Selfishness is the opposite of love and all people are basically selfish. A great marriage is made up of two unselfish people. Even if only one of the people is unselfish then that will change a marriage from bad to good. It is hard to continually fight against love. Love will always cost the person who loves. That is the nature of anything precious and love is worth much and is costly to the one who gives it but love is worth it. It is true that it is better to give than to receive. Usually whenever any gift is given who has the most joy? The one who gives generally has the most joy. In fact, the Lord says to not give under compulsion because giving is an aspect of love and love is a choice. To give is to be godlike, for God so loved the world that He gave. God so loved you that He gave what was most precious to Him and that was His only begotten Son.

For God so loved the world, that He gave His only begotten Son, that whoever believes in Him shall not perish, but have eternal life. John 3:16

Understand What a Great Marriage will Cost the Wife

A great marriage is a gift and it is also requires great sacrifice. A great marriage is made up of two people who sacrifice their own wants, dreams, needs, longings and comforts for another. It is best to give all of these to the Lord and allow Him to give back to you in His time what you really need. We usually do not know what we really need. How many things have we all longed for, that in hindsight, we see that they would not have been good for us. Trust the Lord to give you what is good. He will withhold the bad and give you the good if you leave the giving to Him. A great marriage is costly but just as when Mary took a pound of very costly perfume and anointed the feet of Jesus, the fragrance of her love filled the house. In a similar way, when you love another in a sacrificial, costly manner then the fragrance of the expression of your love will fill the environment where you are. Your love will be a sweet fragrance to the one loved and to all who are around and you will be the one blessed the most.Mary then took a pound of very costly perfume of pure nard, and anointed the feet of Jesus and wiped His feet with her hair; and the house was filled with the fragrance of the perfume. John 12:3 Understand that when you do what is right and love your husband with a godlike love that you will be filled with great joy. Your life will be a fragrant aroma to all who come in contact with you and your joy will spill over into your husband, your children and everyone else who knows you. No one can ever rob you of joy because much joy comes from loving and doing what is right. “You have loved righteousness and hated lawlessness;
Therefore God, Your God, has anointed You
With the oil of gladness above Your companions.” Hebrews 1:9

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A Life Understanding a Man’s Need to Respect a Woman

Men long for respect and they need respect. Men also need to respect a woman and women need for men to respect them. A man needs a woman but he especially needs a woman that he respects. A woman that a man respects will lift him up to a higher standard of behavior. A man generally will not curse around a lady nor will he act in other crude manners. Her respectful behavior is enough to change him as he observes it and her lack of response to any crude jokes or comments is enough to shame him. A man can be a man with other men and not offend them but a man needs to learn how to act in a loving, respectful manner with females.Now concerning the things about which you wrote, it is good for a man not to touch a woman. I Corinthians 7:1The word “good” in this verse means, in the original language, the highest form of love.

Understanding A Woman’s Need for Respect

A woman needs respect. A woman’s self worth is affected by how she is treated. If she is treated poorly then she will start to feel poorly about herself. She longs for love and needs love but she also needs respect. Love and respect go hand in hand. If a woman is treated like a queen then she will feel like a queen. If she feels like a queen then she will want to marry a king and feel that she is worthy of a king. If she feels like dirt then she will feel that no king would want to marry her and she will “settle” for far less. A woman’s self worth is one of the most important aspects of who she is. When a man uses a woman in any way then he is neither loving her or respecting her. When a female allows herself to be used then she is bringing destruction to herself. When a man uses a woman then it is like squeezing the juice out of an orange and then discarding the orange. The woman is no longer the same. She is no longer vibrant and feeling healthy about herself because she has been used and rejected. She will often settle for someone “not as nice” as the first man and if she is looking for love in the wrong way then he will squeeze more juice out of her and then discard her. The pattern continues until she is left feeling empty and rejected by men.

but if the salt has become tasteless, how can it be made salty again? It is no longer good for anything, except to be thrown out and trampled under foot by men. Matthew 5:13b

Salt becomes tasteless when it has been compromised. A woman will be rejected and walked over by men if she compromises her morals and allows a man to touch her in inappropriate places or have premariatal sex. A man does not love a woman that he has sex with before marriage. He is using her for his own selfish desire. Nearly all men who are unfaithful to their wives after marriage had sex before marriage. They did not learn to control their passions before marriage and usually can not control them afterwards. Sex is a physical appetite to a man and he must learn to control his sexual drive. He learns to control himself by first learning to control what he looks at. His eyes get him into trouble and the Bible says that the “eyes of man are never satisfied”. It is important that a female dress in a modest manner that does not direct the man’s eyes to sexually stimulating parts of her body. If she does, she will get attention but not the love and respect she longs for and the attention is only for a moment. If he is stimulated then he will want to touch her in an inappropriate manner and she must say “no” so that he does not get what he wants. It is much better if the boundaries are already established by how she dresses.

Nor are the eyes of man ever satisfied. Proverbs 27:20