#whatislove – Page 14 – Instructions To A Young Life

A Life with Love Does What is Right

When Adam and Eve were in the garden of Eden before they sinned they did not need any rules other than the one that the Lord had given to them. They loved God and they loved each other. Their love was perfect for God and for each other because their hearts were pure. They had never known any evil.

The Lord God commanded the man, saying, “From any tree of the garden you may eat freely; but from the tree of the knowledge of good and evil you shall not eat, for in the day that you eat from it you will surely die.” Genesis 2:16,17

If Adam and Eve had never sinned then they would not have ever needed any more rules or laws to live by. The Lord only gives commandments for our good and our protection. He does not give us commandments to deprive us of anything that would be good for us. The Lord knew that it would not be good for Adam and Eve to come into the knowledge of evil. They would lose their innocence and purity. They would be tempted in ways that the Lord never designed for them to be tempted. The Lord gives the same commandment in the New Testament and that is to not have the knowledge of evil.

For the report of your obedience has reached to all; therefore I am rejoicing over you, but I want you to be wise in what is good and innocent in what is evil. Romans 16:19

The Lord wants us to wise in what is good but innocent in what is evil. We need to be mature in our thinking but babies in the knowledge of evil.

Brethren, do not be children in your thinking; yet in evil be infants, but in your thinking be mature. I Corinthians 14:20

When we become knowledgeable in evil then our thinking has become defiled by what we have seen or heard. When our thinking has become impure then we are not holy in our behavior. One sin always leads to another if we do not repent. The Lord has commanded us to be holy, which means that we are to be separate from the world and do what is right in God’s sight. Then we will be available for the Lord to use us.

As obedient children, do not be conformed to the former lusts which were yours in your ignorance, but like the Holy One who called you, be holy yourselves also in all your behavior; because it is written, “You shall be holy, for I am holy.”

I Peter 1:14-16

When we are holy then the world will know that Jesus Christ is Lord.

I will vindicate the holiness of My great name which has been profaned among the nations, which you have profaned in their midst. Then the nations will know that I am the Lord,” declares the Lord God, “when I prove Myself holy among you in their sight. Ezekiel 36:23

When we compromise and do not do what is right then we have lost the power and influence in the world that God designed for us to have with the people who have yet to come to know Him. When those who know God sin then the world may say, “they are no different than me” or “they do the same things that I do so I do not have to listen to what they say”.

Like a trampled spring and a polluted well, Is a righteous man who gives way before the wicked. Proverbs 25:26

Before Adam and Eve sinned they were holy. They lost their holiness and they lost their power. The Lord Jesus Christ came to make us holy. He wants us to be innocent in what is evil. The less we know of evil the less we will sin. The more we know of evil then the more we will sin. Evil does not destroy us unless we do it. There is a difference between evil being done to us and being around evil against our will and us voluntarily learning about evil through entertainment or deceiving ourselves by saying “there is some good in this book, movie, etc.” even though there is also the knowledge of evil. You are subjecting yourself to evil when you voluntarily learn about it through compromise. You are bringing destruction to yourself. When you bring destruction to yourself then you are also bringing destruction to anyone with whom you are in a relationship and especially a marriage relationship. The Lord loves us and gives us instructions and commandments to protect us from destroying ourselves and each other. Love keeps His commandments.

and you shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, and with all your soul, and with all your mind, and with all your strength.’ The second is this, ‘You shall love your neighbor as yourself.’ There is no other commandment greater than these.” Mark 12:30,31

When you love the Lord your God with all of your heart, soul, mind and strength and your neighbor as yourself then you will have fulfilled all of God’s commandments. You will have loved and done what is right in God’s sight. You will be holy in all your behavior. Your life will have power and evil will not destroy you.

the power of an indestructible life. Hebrews 7:16

A Life with Love Has Great Peace

When Adam and Eve lived in the garden and walked with the Lord in sweet fellowship they enjoyed great peace with God and with each other. There was no drama in the garden and life was good. He only had one commandment for them and that was for their good. As long as they loved God and obeyed that one commandment then they would live in peace forever. When they thought that they knew better than God and did their “own thing” and sinned then they no longer enjoyed peace and they were afraid.

They heard the sound of the Lord God walking in the garden in the cool of the day, and the man and his wife hid themselves from the presence of the Lord God among the trees of the garden. Then the Lord God called to the man, and said to him, “Where are you?” He said, “I heard the sound of You in the garden, and I was afraid because I was naked; so I hid myself.” Genesis 3:8-10

Peace and fear can not abide in the same person. When Adam and Eve did not love God by keeping His commandment then sin robbed Adam and Eve of the peace that they knew and replaced the peace with fear. Fear causes us to hide and we no longer experience life as God designed because of our fears. The fears become a snare to us.

The fear of man brings a snare,
But he who trusts in the Lord will be exalted. Proverbs 29:25

Many of our fears are imagined and never come to pass but they influence our lives and cause us to hide. Only the Lord’s love can cast out the fears that we have.

There is no fear in love; but perfect love casts out fear, I John 4:18

As we learn to live in His love by keeping His commandments then we will once again know His presence and experience great peace.

He who has My commandments and keeps them is the one who loves Me; and he who loves Me will be loved by My Father, and I will love him and will disclose Myself to him.” John 14:21

The more we love His commandments then the more we will keep them. As we keep His commandments then we will see that they are for our good and the good of those around us. Keeping His commandments brings peace to those who keep them and peace in the homes where God and His Word is loved.

Those who love Your law have great peace, And nothing causes them to stumble. Psalm 119:165

When we love God’s Word then we love the Lord and when we love the Lord then we will love His Word. The Word of God became flesh and lived among mankind in the person of Jesus Christ. He is fully man and fully God. God’s Word and His name are equal. When we love Him, His name and His Word then we will have great peace and nothing will cause us to fear.

And give thanks to Your name for Your lovingkindness and Your truth;
For You have magnified Your word according to all Your name. Psalm 138:2b

Jesus Christ came to not only restore us to our relationship with God but He came to bring us peace. When we are restored to God through Jesus Christ then we experience and know great peace. Nothing can take that peace away.

Peace I leave with you; My peace I give to you; not as the world gives do I give to you. Do not let your heart be troubled, nor let it be fearful. John 14:27

If someone does not know the Lord then they need to be in great fear for their fears will be realized but those who know the Lord do not need to fear and their desires will be granted because they have put their trust in God.

What the wicked fears will come upon him,
But the desire of the righteous will be granted. Proverbs 10:24

A Life with Love Does Not Hide

When Adam and Eve loved God they did not hide from Him. When they loved each other they did not hide from each other. It was not until sin came into the world that man began to hide from God and from each other. We will hide behind all sorts of coverings and facades. We hide because we are insecure. Love makes us secure but sin takes away our security.

Then the eyes of both of them were opened, and they knew that they were naked; and they sewed fig leaves together and made themselves loin coverings. They heard the sound of the Lord God walking in the garden in the cool of the day, and the man and his wife hid themselves from the presence of the Lord God among the trees of the garden. Then the Lord God called to the man, and said to him, “Where are you?” He said, “I heard the sound of You in the garden, and I was afraid because I was naked; so I hid myself.” Genesis 3:7-10

Of course the Lord knew where Adam and Eve were. He knows where all of us are and exactly what we are doing and what we have done. There is nothing hidden from Him.

And there is no creature hidden from His sight, but all things are open and laid bare to the eyes of Him with whom we have to do. Hebrews 4:13

The Lord asked Adam where he was not so that God would know, for He already knew, but He asked Adam so that Adam would acknowledge where he was and what he had done. The Lord wants an honest heart and not a person who pretends to be somewhere they are not or someone whom they are not. The Lord is still asking man, “Where are you in relation to God?”

But the seed in the good soil, these are the ones who have heard the word in an honest and good heart, and hold it fast, and bear fruit with perseverance. Now no one after lighting a lamp covers it over with a container, or puts it under a bed; but he puts it on a lampstand, so that those who come in may see the light. For nothing is hidden that will not become evident, nor anything secret that will not be known and come to light. Luke 8:15-17

It is not until we learn to be honest with the Lord can we be honest with each other. We can not trust ourselves, for our hearts are deceitful. We deceive ourselves but we can trust the Lord. We can not deceive Him.

Many a man proclaims his own loyalty,
But who can find a trustworthy man? Proverbs 20:6

How do you know if someone is trustworthy? Many a man will proclaim to a girl his loyalty. How does she know if he will keep his wedding vows to her? How does she know if he will be faithful to her? There is a way that she can know if he is trustworthy before marriage and if he is trustworthy before marriage then there is a much greater chance that he will be trustworthy after marriage. If he fails this test then there is a much greater possibility that he will not be faithful to her after marriage. Trustworthiness comes from the words “worthy of trust”. A man who is worthy of trust will be faithful to the Lord before marriage and will not touch a girl in an inappropriate manner. Trust must be characterized by moral excellence. A man exhibits self control when he controls his passions before marriage and if he can control his passions before marriage then he will most likely control his passions after marriage.

Now for this very reason also, applying all diligence, in your faith supply moral excellence, and in your moral excellence, knowledge, and in your knowledge, self-control, and in your self-control, perseverance, and in your perseverance, godliness, and in your godliness, brotherly kindness, and in your brotherly kindness, love. II Peter 1:5-7

The beginning of love must be faith in God. Then for there to be love there must be moral excellence and then knowledge and then self control. A man must persevere in his self control and as he perseveres then he will become godly and learn kindness and then he will learn to love as God has loved him. This is the only kind of love that will last. This is a pure love that is built on the Lord and the man who loves like this will be blessed in his marriage and he will be a blessing to the woman he marries. She will trust him for he will have proven himself to be trustworthy. He will have nothing to hide from God or from his wife or others.

A Life with Love Can Be Rejected

Love to the soul is like food for the body. We need it, we long for it if we do not have it and we will do almost anything to get it. This is where many a young person gets into trouble. Looking for love in the wrong places. A price can not be put on love because it is the greatest gift that you can ever receive from another and only a fool exchanges love. God is the source of all love and He offers His love to every single person in the world. The Bible describes the fool as one who rejects God’s love and lives as if there is no God. Adam and Eve rejected God’s love when they chose to live as if there was no God. They disobeyed the God of the universe and thought they knew better than their Creator.

The fool has said in his heart,”There is no God.” They are corrupt, they have committed abominable deeds; Psalm 14:1a

When Adam and Eve rejected God’s love and did not obey the Lord and His command for them they sinned and their hearts became not only foolish but wicked. They received a sinful nature because now they had a sinful heart that was both foolish and wicked.

The wicked, in the haughtiness of his countenance, does not seek Him.
All his thoughts are, “There is no God.” Psalm 10:4

Not only did Adam and Eve not seek the Lord but they hid from Him when they heard the sound of God walking in the garden. The wicked person also will seek to avoid Christians who are living for the Lord. Haughtiness is another word for pride. It is our pride that does not want to need God or seek Him.

Adam and Eve hid themselves because they were ashamed and guilty. When they hid from God they could no longer experience His love for them. His love had not changed but they had changed. Sin does this to us. It changes us and all of our relationships. We become insecure and we not only want to hide from God but we want to cover ourselves up around others. We don’t want to be vulnerable. We have rejected God and His love when we sin and now we are fearful that others will reject us. The most secure people in the world are those who have experienced God’s salvation and live in fellowship with the Lord and obey His commands. They have nothing to fear.

The Lord is my light and my salvation;
Whom shall I fear?
The Lord is the defense of my life;
Whom shall I dread? Psalm 27:1

A Life with Love that Came Again

It was love that came again to earth when God sent His only begotten Son to reconcile men and women to God and the love relationship with God that God planned from the beginning. Jesus Christ came to restore everything that man lost and He gave even more.

For God so loved the world, that He gave His only begotten Son, that whoever believes in Him shall not perish, but have eternal life. John 3:16

God gave, for love gives, and the gift of His Son is available for anyone who wants to be restored to a love relationship with God. He came to die that He might give life to anyone who will believe in Him. Those who believe will never be separated from His love ever again.

For I am convinced that neither death, nor life, nor angels, nor principalities, nor things present, nor things to come, nor powers, nor height, nor depth, nor any other created thing, will be able to separate us from the love of God, which is in Christ Jesus our Lord. Romans 8:38,39

Jesus Christ came to earth through the seed of the woman just as God said He would. He was born of a virgin since He is God, Himself.

Mary said to the angel, “How can this be, since I am a virgin?” The angel answered and said to her, “The Holy Spirit will come upon you, and the power of the Most High will overshadow you; and for that reason the holy Child shall be called the Son of God. Luke 1:34,35

Jesus grew in wisdom and in stature and in favor with God and man.

And Jesus kept increasing in wisdom and stature, and in favor with God and men. Luke 2:52

Jesus was made in the likeness of sinful man so that He could relate to our struggles and temptations and yet, He never sinned. Jesus came as an offering for our sin and as a result sin was condemned in the flesh. There is therefore now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus.

Therefore there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus. For the law of the Spirit of life in Christ Jesus has set you free from the law of sin and of death. For what the Law could not do, weak as it was through the flesh, God did: sending His own Son in the likeness of sinful flesh and as an offering for sin, He condemned sin in the flesh, Romans 8:1-3

Jesus had to learn the Word of God and He had to learn obedience. Jesus Christ was faithful to what God had commanded Him. He took the condemnation that we deserved and so we have been set free from the penalty of death. After He died and rose again, making purification of sins, then He sat down at the right hand of God.

When He had made purification of sins, He sat down at the right hand of the Majesty on high Hebrews 1:3b

If we have received Jesus Christ as our Lord and Savior then we can come to Him, for He is our high priest, who prays for us and delights in our coming to Him. He sits on a throne of grace and gives mercy and grace to those who come to Him.

For we do not have a high priest who cannot sympathize with our weaknesses, but One who has been tempted in all things as we are, yet without sin. Therefore let us draw near with confidence to the throne of grace, so that we may receive mercy and find grace to help in time of need. Hebrews 4:15,16

God made men and women to be in a love relationship with Him. He never reproved them for their failure to keep His commandment but provided a way for them to be restored to the love relationship with Him. Love does not blame. Love finds a way. Love perseveres. Love pursues the relationship. Love gives. Love sacrifices. God did all of this when He sent Jesus Christ to die for the world, that whoever believes in Him, may be restored to the love relationship that God planned from the beginning. He took everything that man lost in the garden and restores those as well. He not only restores the love but He restores the peace and the joy also. He brings healing to our souls and bodies. He heals our relationships that have been broken through sin.

Therefore if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creature; the old things passed away; behold, new things have come. Now all these things are from God, who reconciled us to Himself through Christ II Corinthians 5:17,18a

He is alive today and you will find Him if you seek Him. He is seeking to have a love relationship with you.

For I delivered to you as of first importance what I also received, that Christ died for our sins according to the Scriptures, and that He was buried, and that He was raised on the third day according to the Scriptures, I Corinthians 15:3,4

He loves you!

A Life with Love Does Not Change

Love does not change. If it does then it is not love. God is love and He does not change. There are two things that will not change and it is these two things that give us security in this world and security for all eternity. When Adam and Eve sinned God’s love did not change for them. He loved them as much as he had loved them before. It was Adam and Eve who had changed and they could no longer experience God’s love.

“For I, the Lord, do not change; Malachi 3:6a

It was God, the Father and Jesus, the Son of God who said in the beginning, “Let us make man in our image.”

Jesus Christ is God’s only begotten Son, equal with God, the Father, and He does not change.

Jesus Christ is the same yesterday and today and forever. Hebrews 13:8

God’s Word does not change. Those who have put their trust in Jesus Christ have been born again into His family through the living and enduring Word of God. It endures forever and will never change.

for you have been born again not of seed which is perishable but imperishable, that is, through the living and enduring word of God. For, “All flesh is like grass,
And all its glory like the flower of grass.
The grass withers,
And the flower falls off,
But the word of the Lord endures forever.” I Peter 1:23-25a

When God made Adam and Eve, his plan for them was love. He said that if they would keep His commandments then they would live and not die. His plan was for them to live in His love for all eternity. He never designed that they would experience grief, death, guilt, fear, shame, regret, slavery or any of the other horrible consequences of disobeying Him and rejecting living in His love. When they sinned He did not reject them. They rejected God. He still loved them and came up with another provision for them to live in His love. His provision was to be a sacrificial love so that man could “see” how much God loved them. Those who receive this sacrificial love will live forever in God’s love and will never need to hide again.

“Do not let your heart be troubled; believe in God, believe also in Me. In My Father’s house are many dwelling places; if it were not so, I would have told you; for I go to prepare a place for you. If I go and prepare a place for you, I will come again and receive you to Myself, that where I am, there you may be also. John 14:1-3

God loves you and He says that one day He will come back and take those who love Him to the home that He has prepared for them. Jesus Christ said that He would die and rise again from the dead and He did, just as He said. He is risen and and will raise us up also to live forever with Him in His love, just as He says. He is our hope. We do not need to fear. He says that He loves us and God will never lie. We can trust Him and His Word completely. Let not your heart be troubled you who have believed in God and His Word. He is alive and you also will live with Him. God does not change.

A Life with Love is not Prideful

After Adam sinned he hid himself because he was afraid. He was afraid of how the Lord would respond. No longer was Adam responding to the Lord in obedience but Adam initiated sin and now he was anticipating God’s response. He speculated and presumed that the Lord would not be pleased and may even be angry so he hid himself. The relationship now had gotten turned around because Adam had sinned and it was no longer according to God’s blueprint. God is the initiator and man is the responder. The One who is the leader and begins the relationship is the initiator.

Then God said, “Let Us make man in Our image, according to Our likeness; and let them rule over the fish of the sea and over the birds of the sky and over the cattle and over all the earth, and over every creeping thing that creeps on the earth.” God created man in His own image, in the image of God He created him; male and female He created them. God blessed them; and God said to them, “Be fruitful and multiply, and fill the earth, and subdue it; and rule over the fish of the sea and over the birds of the sky and over every living thing that moves on the earth.” Genesis 1:26-28

God began the love relationship with man and God had a plan for Adam and Eve. He gave them a purpose in life and a calling. He gave the man and woman glory when He made them in the image of God. He crowned them with honor.

What is man that You take thought of him,
And the son of man that You care for him?
Yet You have made him a little lower than God,
And You crown him with glory and majesty!
You make him to rule over the works of Your hands;
You have put all things under his feet,
All sheep and oxen,
And also the beasts of the field,
The birds of the heavens and the fish of the sea,
Whatever passes through the paths of the seas. Psalm 8:4-8

Adam and Eve in their pride and foolishness disobeyed God and were no longer responding to His love for them. They thought they knew better than God. They became in a sense like God but since they were not God, they failed miserably and lost everything. They lost their fellowship with God and they lost their glory and honor. They lost the trust that God had in them. They lost their home. They lost the joy of being in God’s presence. They lost experiencing His love. They lost it all because of their pride.

When pride comes, then comes dishonor,
But with the humble is wisdom. Proverbs 11:2

In a similar way, the man is the leader in his relationship with a woman. He is to be the initiator and she is to be the responder. The man is the one who initiates and begins the marriage. God has made the husband to be primarily responsible for the marriage.

Then the Lord God said, “It is not good for the man to be alone; I will make him a helper suitable for him.” Genesis 2:18

The woman is called to respond to and follow her husband. It is a woman’s pride that makes her want to control the relationship. It is not God’s blueprint for marriage. God made the man first and brought the woman to him. If you want your marriage to be successful then you must follow God’s plan and have your marriage be built after God’s blueprint.

So the Lord God caused a deep sleep to fall upon the man, and he slept; then He took one of his ribs and closed up the flesh at that place. The Lord God fashioned into a woman the rib which He had taken from the man, and brought her to the man. The man said, “This is now bone of my bones,
And flesh of my flesh;
She shall be called Woman,
Because she was taken out of Man.” Genesis 2:21-23

The marriage relationship is to be a picture of God’s relationship with man. If you are a wife then your relationship with your husband is a picture of your relationship with the Lord. If you are a husband then your relationship with your wife is a picture of how well you understand and know the Lord and His love and how obedient you are to Him.

This mystery is great; but I am speaking with reference to Christ and the church. Nevertheless, each individual among you also is to love his own wife even as himself, and the wife must see to it that she respects her husband. Ephesians 5:32,33

If a wife is and does as God has called her to be and do, then she will be the crown of her husband. She will receive glory and be crowned with honor.

An excellent wife is the crown of her husband, Proverbs 12:4a

If the husband does and is as God would have him then he will have that excellent wife whose worth far exceeds jewels. His heart will trust her and he will not lack gain. She will do him good all the days of her life.

An excellent wife, who can find?
For her worth is far above jewels.
The heart of her husband trusts in her,
And he will have no lack of gain.
She does him good and not evil
All the days of her life. Proverbs 31:10-12

A Life with Love Involves the Will

Our soul is made up of our mind, will and emotions. Man is made up of spirit, soul and body. The decisions that we make in life are expressed through our body but made through our soul. Every decision that we make involves our soul and affects our soul. Love is an expression of the soul. We choose to love with our mind and our will and it affects our emotions. We choose to hate with our mind and our will and it also affects our emotions. We choose to believe with our mind and our will and it affects our destiny. Loving and believing are a choice of the mind and will. When we respond to God’s love and believe in Jesus Christ, God’s Son, then our spirit becomes alive. It is in our spirit that we worship and communicate with God. It is with our soul that we communicate with each other. It is with our spirit, soul and body that we love God and love another.

Now may the God of peace Himself sanctify you entirely; and may your spirit and soul and body be preserved complete, without blame at the coming of our Lord Jesus Christ. I Thessalonians 5:23

When we love God and love another as God has called us to do then our spirit, soul and body are preserved. When we sin against God and each other then we bring destruction to ourselves. Our spirit is made complete in Christ at the time of our conversion, if we are a Christian. Our soul is being made complete through our obedience to the Lord. Our soul experiences life when we do what is right. Our soul experiences death when we do what is wrong. The death to our soul is the sick feeling we have when the guilt comes and all the other feelings of regret. Guilt brings torment to the soul.

Therefore, putting aside all filthiness and all that remains of wickedness, in humility receive the word implanted, which is able to save your souls. James 1:21

God’s Word can be implanted in our soul and saves our soul. God’s Word gives life to our soul. Just as someone who receives a heart transplant because his heart is not functioning right, so we need to receive God’s Word implanted because our thoughts are not right. We have been corrupted in our mind, will and emotions. When we receive God’s Word into our soul then it transforms our mind, will and emotions so that we will know what is right. Our mind will tell us the right thing to do and our will carries it out. The happiness we experience in our emotions is because we did what was right.

“You have loved righteousness and hated lawlessness;
Therefore God, Your God, has anointed You
With the oil of gladness above Your companions.” Hebrews 1:9

Sin is lawlessness and when we sin then we experience death to the soul.

Everyone who practices sin also practices lawlessness; and sin is lawlessness. I John 3:4

Everyone does just what he wants to do. If a man loves a woman then he will show love to her. Many women try to make excuses for a man when he does not call, come see her, etc. but it is because he does not want to. There are always exceptions when something urgent does come up, but love will always want to make up what was missed. In the same way, many people try to make excuses for themselves about why they do not believe in God and/or do what He wants them to do, but the bottom line is that they do not want to believe in God. They do not want to do what He says. Belief and love are a matter of the will. A person does just what they want to do.

And this commandment we have from Him, that the one who loves God should love his brother also. I John 4:21

The Lord would not have commanded us to do something that we could not do. Every marriage that fails is because someone gave up in their mind and will to love their spouse. Everyone messes up. Love is covering another’s mess. Shame is making it known. We cover up messes with our will and we make messes known with our will. Love is not always easy but it is worth it. When you are committed to loving another then it is only a matter of time before you will make a mess and you will be thankful that the other chose to love you.

Where no oxen are, the manger is clean, But much revenue comes by the strength of the ox. Proverbs 14:4

When you are single and live alone then there are not many messes but there is no love. When a married couple have no children then their home is clean. However, there is great joy being in a loving marriage and there also is great fulfillment in having children. Many messes come in relationships but much happiness comes when life is done right.

A Life with Love Must Be a Wise Choice

One of the most misunderstood aspects of love is that many think that love is a feeling. Love is a choice of the mind and will and the emotions and feelings will follow. The soul is made up of the mind, will and emotions and is what allows you to enjoy all of the gifts that God, in His love, gives to mankind. One of His most precious gifts is a lover, friend, companion and soulmate whom you can go through life with and share in the joy of life. Love is a commitment and should be entered into with your mind and your will and if possible, very little emotion. When you make a major decision in life, such as, where you want to live, or go to school, or what career you want to pursue, then you use your mind. With your mind you try to make the choice objectively so that you can see clearly. How much greater is the decision as to whom you will marry and share life.

If it is disagreeable in your sight to serve the Lord, choose for yourselves today whom you will serve: whether the gods which your fathers served which were beyond the River, or the gods of the Amorites in whose land you are living; but as for me and my house, we will serve the Lord.” Joshua 24:15

The most important qualification for a marriage partner is who the other person chooses to serve. If you are a Christian and they are not then you will be miserable and they will be unhappy also because you all will not be of the same mind. They will have their god ad you will want to love the Lord God. You will not be able to share your greatest joys with the person who serves a different god. Who you serve is who you will love. Love is a choice in the God whom you choose to follow and worship. Whoever or whatever is your god will be the center of your life. If a person is self centered then they want to be their own god. If money is a person’s god then that will be the motivational factor in their life. If the Lord Jesus Christ is your God then you will want to please Him. No one can serve two masters and a marriage and home can not serve two masters. You will hate his god and he will hate your god if you both do not have to same Master in life.

No one can serve two masters; for either he will hate the one and love the other, or he will be devoted to one and despise the other. You cannot serve God and wealth. Matthew 6:24

You and your spouse must be of the same mind, otherwise there will not be unity. If you both are on the same page with the same mind then there will be little disagreement when it comes to decisions, and especially major decisions.

Now I exhort you, brethren, by the name of our Lord Jesus Christ, that you all agree and that there be no divisions among you, but that you be made complete in the same mind and in the same judgment. I Corinthians 1:10

You both will want to have the same purpose in life, which means that you will be going in the same direction overall. Everything that you do will be towards the same goal. When you have the same purpose in life then each one of you will help the other achieve their unique calling and purpose in life and you both will complement each other rather than hinder one another. Each victory will be both of your victories and each sorrow will be shared. You will not cry alone.

make my joy complete by being of the same mind, maintaining the same love, united in spirit, intent on one purpose. Philippians 2:2

The more united that two married people are then the more each individual will achieve their full potential in life. The happier each one will be, will be directly proportional to the sameness in mind, the uniting of love and the oneness of purpose. However, all of this is only possible if both in the marriage are of one spirit. Two people can only be of one spirit if they are spiritually alive. Only Jesus Christ can make a person spiritually alive. When two people become spiritually alive then they have the capacity to be of one soul with each other. It is during the pre-marriage phase of a friendship that two people discover whether they are meant for one another. You must see the other person objectively for each of your own benefit.

Do not be bound together with unbelievers; for what partnership have righteousness and lawlessness, or what fellowship has light with darkness? Or what harmony has Christ with Belial, or what has a believer in common with an unbeliever? II Corinthians 6:14,15

Marriage is one of the greatest joys when it is done God’s way. The sexual intimacy is reserved for marriage and the only way that you will know if God brings you together is when you come to the altar to say your vows to God. He brings two people together and joins them. If you enter into physical intimacy before marriage then you will not see clearly if this person is the one. You are only robbing yourself of another one of God’s gifts and you are also blinding your own eyes to what you need to see in the other person. Once two people become physically intimate then they can no longer see objectively.

So they are no longer two, but one flesh. What therefore God has joined together, let no man separate.” Matthew 19:6

Marriage protects the love. The vows are made to keep us faithful to our spouse. The vows are made to God and vows made to God can not be broken. They must be kept. If they are kept then both of you will be blessed and both of you will grow in the love of the Lord. Life and marriage were made to be sweet and they can be, but only, if you follow the instructions of the One who is the Author of life and the Giver of good gifts.

A Life with Love Must Choose

The Lord does not mention much about Abraham’s family in the Bible but it does say that his father worshiped false gods but Abraham did not. We don’t know where Abraham heard about the one true God, who is Lord of all, but Abraham chose to follow the Lord.

Joshua said to all the people, “Thus says the Lord, the God of Israel, ‘From ancient times your fathers lived beyond the River, namely, Terah, the father of Abraham and the father of Nahor, and they served other gods. Joshua 24:2

We do know that Noah was still alive when Abraham was a boy and they lived in the same area. Whether Abraham heard first hand from Noah what the Lord had done in the flood we do not know. Noah was a preacher of righteousness and probably continued to preach after the flood.

and did not spare the ancient world, but preserved Noah, a preacher of righteousness, with seven others, when He brought a flood upon the world of the ungodly; II Peter 2:5

Abraham had to make a choice, whom he would follow. Who you follow is who you will serve. It is hard to go against the tide, that is, to go against how others are believing. However, Abraham chose the Lord and the Lord chose Abraham and made him fruitful.

Then I took your father Abraham from beyond the River, and led him through all the land of Canaan, and multiplied his descendants and gave him Isaac. Joshua 24:3

The Lord called Abraham to trust Him and live by faith. The Lord is still calling men and women to trust Him and live by faith.

Now the Lord said to Abram,

“Go forth from your country,
And from your relatives
And from your father’s house,
To the land which I will show you;
And I will make you a great nation,
And I will bless you,
And make your name great;
And so you shall be a blessing;
And I will bless those who bless you,
And the one who curses you I will curse.
And in you all the families of the earth will be blessed.” Genesis 12:1-3

Faith means that we trust God for His promises to us and we step out in faith on those promises. When we walk by faith then we do not walk by sight. Faith is believing that God is who He is and that He will be faithful to His Word.

And without faith it is impossible to please Him, for he who comes to God must believe that He is and that He is a rewarder of those who seek Him. Hebrews 11:6

We walk by faith all of the time when we believe someone is going to do what they say. If a friend says that they will meet us for lunch then we go to the place for lunch expecting them to show up. Faith in God is the same. If He said that He will do something then we can count on Him to do it. Faith is a choice. Love is a choice. When we love someone then we will believe them. Faith grows. As we see the Lord show Himself to be faithful to His Word then we can trust Him more. Love grows as faith grows but love must first choose to have faith in the one whom we choose to love. Abraham chose to love God and believe in Him and as a result he experienced God’s love and God’s faithfulness. We usually don’t doubt God’s power but we doubt His love. Faith believes that God loves us because He says that He loves us. Not only does He say that He loves us but He showed us His love.

For God so loved the world, that He gave His only begotten Son, that whoever believes in Him shall not perish, but have eternal life. John 3:16

It is God’s grace that invites us to choose Him and come to Him. Faith is choosing Him and coming to Him. When we come to Jesus then we see His love, we feel His love and we know His love through His gift of salvation.

But God, being rich in mercy, because of His great love with which He loved us, even when we were dead in our transgressions, made us alive together with Christ (by grace you have been saved), and raised us up with Him, and seated us with Him in the heavenly places in Christ Jesus, so that in the ages to come He might show the surpassing riches of His grace in kindness toward us in Christ Jesus. For by grace you have been saved through faith; and that not of yourselves, it is the gift of God; not as a result of works, so that no one may boast. Ephesians 2:4-9

The Lord is rich in mercy and loves us with a great love. He loved us when we were great sinners and dead in our spirit. He makes us alive on the inside because of Jesus. When someone comes to Jesus then they just begin the great journey of God’s love for them. His love for them will go through the ages into eternity. It is His grace that allows us to come to Him through faith and when we do, we receive the amazing gift of His love and we are saved from the torment, the guilt and the consequences of the messes that we have made as a result of our choosing to go our own way. When we choose Jesus then we choose also to live in His love and to walk in His ways. Life becomes good because His love is good. Love and faith is a choice and when we choose to love God and believe Him then we will also experience His love and faithfulness even as Abraham did.