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A Life that Understands Christianity

Christianity is a relationship with the one true God. The true God is One God but is also three Persons. There is total oneness in the Trinity. The Trinity is God, the Father and God, the Son, whose name is Jesus Christ and God, the Spirit. It is a mystery but God is the Creator and we are His creation. We only know what He gives knowledge of and He says that knowledge of God is understanding. The more we know God then the more we will understand.

and knowledge of the Holy One is understanding. Proverbs 9:10b

God, the Father, so loved the world that He sent His Only Begotten Son, Jesus Christ into the world to live and to die for the sins on the world. Whoever believes in Jesus Christ shall not perish but have eternal life.

For God so loved the world, that He gave His only begotten Son, that whoever believes in Him shall not perish, but have eternal life. John 3:16

Jesus Christ came into the world to take away our sin. He is the Lamb of God who was sacrificed for the world.

The next day he saw Jesus coming to him and said, “Behold, the Lamb of God who takes away the sin of the world! John 1:29

Love is a choice. No one has to receive Jesus Christ and believe in Him. His payment for our sin is a gift. He paid a debt for us we could not pay and He paid a debt He did not owe because He loved us. We can accept the payment. If, we do not accept the payment that Jesus Christ paid for us, then our debt of sin remains with us and we will forever be in hell, cut off from the love of God. Jesus Christ died for all the world, but all the world will not be saved from hell, only those who receive Him.

and He Himself is the propitiation for our sins; and not for ours only, but also for those of the whole world. I John 2:2

Propitiation means that the death of Jesus Christ on the cross paid the penalty for our sins and satisfied the justice of God. The death of Christ made possible the gift of forgiveness and reconciliation to God. This gift is freely offered to all and those who receive the gift of His payment for our sins receive the gift of forgiveness and a relationship with God. Christianity is not a religion but a relationship with the one living and true God. This relationship can only come through Jesus Christ.

But as many as received Him, to them He gave the right to become children of God, even to those who believe in His name, who were born, not of blood nor of the will of the flesh nor of the will of man, but of God. John 1:12, 13

A person is born into God’s family through faith, that is, through believing in Jesus Christ and what He did for them on the cross. The one who believes in Jesus is born again. He receives the Holy Spirit, who comes to live within the believer. He becomes not only a physical person with a soul but a spiritual person with a body and a soul. He now has the ability to understand God because the Holy Spirit gives him the understanding.

Jesus answered, “Truly, truly, I say to you, unless one is born of water and the Spirit he cannot enter into the kingdom of God.  That which is born of the flesh is flesh, and that which is born of the Spirit is spirit. Do not be amazed that I said to you, ‘You must be born again.’ John 3:5-7

Not only did Jesus Christ die on the cross but He was buried and raised after three days. God, the Father, raised Jesus Christ from the dead. Jesus Christ lives and those who trust in Him will also live forever.

But God raised Him from the dead; Acts 13:30

Just as the Father raised up Jesus from the dead so also Jesus Christ will raise up from the dead those who have put their trust in Him.

For this is the will of My Father, that everyone who beholds the Son and believes in Him will have eternal life, and I Myself will raise him up on the last day.” John 6:40

Christianity is a love relationship with God that begins the moment one believes in and receives Jesus Christ to be their Savior and confesses Him to be their Lord.

that if you confess with your mouth Jesus as Lord, and believe in your heart that God raised Him from the dead, you will be saved; for with the heart a person believes, resulting in righteousness, and with the mouth he confesses, resulting in salvation. Romans 10:9, 10

Christianity is having God as your Father and being His child.

See how great a love the Father has bestowed on us, that we would be called children of God; and such we are. I John 3:1a

Christianity is having a Lord and Savior who will never leave you or forsake you.

for He Himself has said, “I will never desert you, nor will I ever forsake you,” Hebrews 13:5b

Christianity is being transferred out of a kingdom of darkness with guilt, judgment and condemnation into a kingdom of light with redemption, freedom from sin and forgiveness.

For He rescued us from the domain of darkness, and transferred us to the kingdom of His beloved Son, in whom we have redemption, the forgiveness of sins. Colossians 1:13,14

Christianity is life and not just life, but an abundant life that never ends. Christianity is eternal life in the presence and love of God.

I came that they may have life, and have it abundantly. John 10:10b

A Life that Understands What Causes a Marriage to Fail

Understand The Causes of Marriage Failure

Marriages don’t just randomly succeed or fail. There are reasons for marriages failing and the reasons are not as complicated as one thinks. Marriage is a life of two people who become united before God. The same reasons why people fail in life are the same reasons why marriages fail. Life is a matter of reaping and sowing. A person will reap what they sow, whether it is good seeds or bad seeds. Just like a field…if good seeds are sown then good fruit will come up but if the seeds of weeds are sown then weeds will come up. Also, if a field is not tended then the weeds that inadvertently fall into it will also spring up and choke the good fruit bearing plants. A marriage reaps the seeds that were sown before marriage. If a couple is immoral before marriage and become physically intimate then the bad fruit of those seeds sown through their actions will be a lack of trust in the relationship and will lead to a lack of love. A wife should not be surprised if her husband is unfaithful to her if she married an immoral man and in the same way a man should not be surprised if his wife is unfaithful if he married an immoral woman. There is a much less likely chance of unfaithfulness in a marriage if both people were morally faithful before marriage. Also, if the woman initiated or manipulated to “get” her husband then she will have doubts if he is the “right one” after marriage. Becoming one in marriage is not easy because it is the dying of each of the two that they might become one in life. There is much give and take and “not getting you own way” in marriage. If there is jealousy and strife in the relationship then marriage becomes far more difficult. Whatever a couple has done in private before marriage will show itself later on in the marriage. In many ways, the time before marriage determines the joys and struggles after marriage. Much more time needs to be put into the preparation of and decisions about marriage before the couple even meet. Marriage is a gift and a work that brings great joy and satisfaction when done right but will also bring much sorrow and grief if done wrong. How much easier it is to prevent a problem than to fix a problem. Building a marriage is similar to building a house and far more important.

Prepare your work outside And make it ready for yourself in the field; Afterwards, then, build your house. Proverbs 24:27

Understand What Is Needed to Prevent a Marriage from Failure

No one goes to the altar with the desire that their marriage will fail. Many books are written on “how to have a successful marriage”. There are two things that a person basically needs to have a successful marriage and to keep a marriage from failing. Those two things are wisdom and prudence. Wisdom is how to succeed and prudence is the flip side of wisdom, in the sense, that prudence tells you what you need to do to prevent failure. Every girl should be desperate to get wisdom and prudence. Prudence will keep her from pain and wisdom will tell her what she needs to do to get out of pain and stay out of pain. Many a girl has had her heart broken simply because she did not have wisdom and prudence. Wisdom will let a girl know what kind of man to marry and prudence will tell her what kind of man to avoid. Wisdom will tell her what a man needs and prudence will keep her from doing the things that a man hates. Yes, there are certain qualities that a woman can have that will drive a man far from her and will cause him to not want to come home to her. If she has wisdom then often he will eagerly look forward to seeing her and coming home. Wisdom and prudence are available to any who will seek God. God is wisdom and prudence also dwells with Him.

I, wisdom, dwell with prudence,
And I find knowledge and discretion. Proverbs 8:12

I love those who love me;
And those who diligently seek me will find me. Proverbs 8:17

Ask God for wisdom. He says that He will give to all who ask Him and He will give wisdom generously and without reproach. That means that He wants to show you the best way and He will not reprove you for not coming to Him earlier. He is waiting for all of us to come to Him for wisdom. Every person in the world needs God’s wisdom and He is more than willing to share it. The Lord wants you to succeed in love and in every area of life. It does not matter how big of a mess you have ever gotten into but that He will show you what you need to do to get out of the mess and get into success.

But if any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask of God, who gives to all generously and without reproach, and it will be given to him. James 1:5

A Life with Love Does Not Shame

The Lord does not shame His children and neither are we to shame one another. There is probably nothing greater that can quench love than to shame another whom God has called us to love. When a person has done wrong then they feel their own shame and it is not the responsibility of anyone else to add to it.

An excellent wife is the crown of her husband, But she who shames him is like rottenness in his bones. Proverbs 12:4

When a wife shames her husband then it goes to the very core of his being and she becomes like one who drains the life out of him. Rather than being a blessing or a gift to him as the Lord intended she has become like the rottenness of death to his very bones.

But when David returned to bless his household, Michal the daughter of Saul came out to meet David and said, “How the king of Israel distinguished himself today! He uncovered himself today in the eyes of his servants’ maids as one of the foolish ones shamelessly uncovers himself!” So David said to Michal, “It was before the Lord, who chose me above your father and above all his house, to appoint me ruler over the people of the Lord, over Israel; therefore I will celebrate before the Lord. I will be more lightly esteemed than this and will be humble in my own eyes, but with the maids of whom you have spoken, with them I will be distinguished.” Michal the daughter of Saul had no child to the day of her death. II Samuel 5:20-23

When Michal, King David’s wife shamed him then he no longer desired to be with her. She had no child to the day of her death. Sometimes a wife will want to put her standards on her husband but she is not to be his conscience and her standards may not be the standards that the Lord has called him to.

In the same way, you wives, be submissive to your own husbands so that even if any of them are disobedient to the word, they may be won without a word by the behavior of their wives, as they observe your chaste and respectful behavior. I Peter 3:1,2

A wife is not responsible for her husband’s actions but she is responsible for her behavior before the Lord. If her husband is not doing what is right in the sight of the Lord then the Lord will deal with him.

For the scepter of wickedness shall not rest upon the land of the righteous, So that the righteous will not put forth their hands to do wrong. Psalm 125:3

If a person is a Christian and is in authority then the Lord will not allow that Christian to continue to do wrong. The Lord will deal with him. If a husband continues to do wrong and the wife has been submissive to her husband and not been his conscience then she needs to trust in the Lord. He is faithful and will not allow the righteous to continue to do wrong.

The scribes and the Pharisees brought a woman caught in adultery, and having set her in the center of the court, they said to Him, “Teacher, this woman has been caught in adultery, in the very act. Now in the Law Moses commanded us to stone such women; what then do You say?” They were saying this, testing Him, so that they might have grounds for accusing Him. But Jesus stooped down and with His finger wrote on the ground. John 8:3-6

When the leaders brought to Jesus a woman who had been caught in adultery, He did not shame her but rather took the focus off of her by writing on the ground. When Jesus wrote on the ground then everyone was no longer looking at the woman but looking at what He was writing. Since she had been caught in adultery, in all likelihood she was not fully clothed. Rather than allowing her to receive further shame from others He wrote on the ground, He used the time needed for someone to bring her something to wrap herself in.

But when they persisted in asking Him, He straightened up, and said to them, “He who is without sin among you, let him be the first to throw a stone at her.” Again He stooped down and wrote on the ground. When they heard it, they began to go out one by one, beginning with the older ones, and He was left alone, and the woman, where she was, in the center of the court. John 8:7-9

Jesus is so amazing that He did not even shame those who brought her to Him. He again stooped down to give them a gracious opportunity to realize that they were not any different than the woman who had been caught in her sin.

Straightening up, Jesus said to her, “Woman, where are they? Did no one condemn you?” She said, “No one, Lord.” And Jesus said, “I do not condemn you, either. Go. From now on sin no more.” John 8:10,11

We are all sinners. Grace is the opposite of shame. Jesus did not come to shame us but He came to show us God’s grace so that we might acknowledge our own sin and come to Him in faith. Salvation is a gift that we receive by His grace when we come to Him in faith.

For by grace you have been saved through faith; and that not of yourselves, it is the gift of God; Ephesians 2:8

When the woman called Jesus Lord then she was acknowledging that Jesus Christ is the Savior who came into the world. He did not come to condemn but He came to forgive.

Therefore there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus. Romans 8:1

She left her encounter with Jesus having been forgiven. His command to her was to “go and sin no more”. If we have had an encounter with Jesus and we have been forgiven then we will want to “go and sin no more”. A changed life is a testimony of a person who has come into a relationship with Jesus Christ. We will no longer want to do the things we did before.

A Life with Love Needs to Give

Just as love needs to be received love also needs to be given away. When love is given away then the receiver reaps more love and has more love to give away. Love is like a cycle that never ends. It is in the giving and receiving of love that we thrive and find our meaning and purpose in life.

Do not be deceived, God is not mocked; for whatever a man sows, this he will also reap. Galatians 6:7

Love is like a seed that is sown. The more love that one sows then the more love will that one reap. Love is also the water that nourishes the seed of love that is sown. When a person seeks to water the lives of others then their life will be watered.

The generous man will be prosperous, And he who waters will himself be watered. Proverbs 11:25

Love is meeting the needs of someone else. God gave His only begotten Son so that we might have eternal life.

For God so loved the world, that He gave His only begotten Son, that whoever believes in Him shall not perish, but have eternal life. John 3:16

We needed to be forgiven of our sins so that we would not perish but have eternal life. God gave and met this need in our life.

For He rescued us from the domain of darkness, and transferred us to the kingdom of His beloved Son, in whom we have redemption, the forgiveness of sins. Colossians 1:13,14

God gave so that we might be redeemed and forgiven. When we are redeemed and forgiven we are also rescued from the domain of darkness and transferred to the kingdom of God’s beloved Son, Jesus Christ.

There was the true Light which, coming into the world, enlightens every man. John 1:9

In the kingdom of darkness there is no light. Those who are still in that kingdom live in a world of despair, darkness, depression and without hope. The Lord wants to deliver them and transfer them to His kingdom, where love is. God gave to us so that we might be able to give to others. When we give to others and meet their needs then we are showing the love of Christ. Love removes the obstacles so that those who have not yet come to know Him might see His love for them, in order that they might come to Him, hear His Word and be forgiven.

We know love by this, that He laid down His life for us; and we ought to lay down our lives for the brethren. But whoever has the world’s goods, and sees his brother in need and closes his heart against him, how does the love of God abide in him? Little children, let us not love with word or with tongue, but in deed and truth. I John 3:16-18

Jesus Christ laid down His life for us so that we could come to know Him. He wants us to lay down our lives for others so that others may come to know Him.

This is My commandment, that you love one another, just as I have loved you. Greater love has no one than this, that one lay down his life for his friends. You are My friends if you do what I command you. John 15:12-14

A Life with Love Needs Grace

We need God’s grace to love and to be faithful to what He has called us to do. He has called us to be His children and love is to characterize our lives. We are to represent Him to others in our lives and our marriages are to show the world His plan of love for mankind. His grace and peace is multiplied to us through the knowledge of God.

Grace and peace be multiplied to you in the knowledge of God and of Jesus our Lord; II Peter 1:2

We are powerless to love with a Godlike love apart from the Lord but can be recipients of His grace and power. We need His grace and His power to live the life He intended for us and to have the love in our marriages that He meant for us to have.

seeing that His divine power has granted to us everything pertaining to life and godliness, through the true knowledge of Him who called us by His own glory and excellence. II Peter 1:3

His divine power has granted us everything that we need pertaining to all of life and to live a godly life and to have a godly marriage in an ungodly world.

For by these He has granted to us His precious and magnificent promises, so that by them you may become partakers of the divine nature, having escaped the corruption that is in the world by lust. II Peter 1:4

It is His precious and magnificent promises that allow us to become like Him and to escape the corruption that is in the world. It is His promises that give us hope that our life and marriage will not be destroyed or corrupted but will grow stronger and stronger as we grow in the love and knowledge of Jesus Christ. We no longer have to live according to our lusts but we can live according to His will which will allow us to experience His love and will bring us great joy and peace. The word “lusts” in the original language means “desires”. It is our “lusts” that destroys love in our relationships and brings death to our marriage. It is His will that nourishes love in our marriage.

But each one is tempted when he is carried away and enticed by his own lust. Then when lust has conceived, it gives birth to sin; and when sin is accomplished, it brings forth death. James 1:14,15

The Lord tells us not to let our “lusts” deceive us. He will give us His desires for our life, which are good and perfect gifts. If we had all of the knowledge to choose what is best for us then they are the good and perfect gifts that He would choose for our lives. He is the only One who is all knowing and knows what we need and what is best for us.

Do not be deceived, my beloved brethren. Every good thing given and every perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of lights, with whom there is no variation or shifting shadow. James 1:17,18

The lusts of the world bring corruption and destruction to our life and marriage. Love in marriage is a good and perfect gift that He wants to give to us. He will give you the grace and power to live according to His ways and to not give in to temptation. No good thing does He withhold from those who walk uprightly.

For the Lord God is a sun and shield;
The Lord gives grace and glory;
No good thing does He withhold from those who walk uprightly. Psalm 84:11

The Lord is the One who gives grace and glory. If you humble yourself before Him then He will give you His grace so that you might have the power to walk uprightly, obey Him and live according to his promises. You will escape the corruption that is in the world that comes to those who seek their own will and live according to their own desires.

But He gives a greater grace. Therefore it says, “God is opposed to the proud, but gives grace to the humble.” James 4:6

A Life with Love Can Be Rekindled

If sin is what causes love to be quenched then doing what is right will help love to be rekindled and come alive again. Another word for doing what is right is righteousness. Often, the love grows cold because there is guilt involved and our pride makes it hard to say that we are sorry and to ask for forgiveness. We can forgive when we realize the tremendous amount of sin in each of our lives that Jesus Christ has forgiven. Again, it is our own pride that feels that we do not need God and that we do not need to walk in His ways.

But I say to you that everyone who is angry with his brother shall be guilty before the court; and whoever says to his brother, ‘You good-for-nothing,’ shall be guilty before the supreme court; and whoever says, ‘You fool,’ shall be guilty enough to go into the fiery hell. Therefore if you are presenting your offering at the altar, and there remember that your brother has something against you, leave your offering there before the altar and go; first be reconciled to your brother, and then come and present your offering. Matthew 5:22-24

How easy it is to sin with our tongue when we are angry. The Lord says that if we even call someone a fool then there is guilt enough to send us to hell. The Lord says that we all sin with our tongue. Just as He was not mad at Adam and Eve when they sinned but He was sad for them, in the same way, He is not angry with you when you sin, He wants to help you make it right so that the devil does not destroy your marriage. He tells us what to do if we get angry with someone.

Be angry, and yet do not sin; do not let the sun go down on your anger, and do not give the devil an opportunity. Ephesians 4:26,27

Anger is really hurt and if it is not dealt with then it becomes bitterness or wrath, which is stored up anger. Be honest with yourself if what someone said or what they did hurt you. If you said something back then ask the Lord to forgive you and then ask the other person to forgive you. You are not responsible for their actions but you are responsible for your actions. The Lord will help you do what is right. He loves you and wants you to experience love and life. God is a restorer and He wants to see your marriage and relationships restored when they have been damaged or broken.

And the work of righteousness will be peace,
And the service of righteousness, quietness and confidence forever.
Then my people will live in a peaceful habitation,
And in secure dwellings and in undisturbed resting places; Isaiah 32:17,18

As you learn to do what is right and follow the Lord in what He says then you will find that your home will be filled with peace and the love that you and your spouse have for each other will be rekindled.

Do not be deceived, God is not mocked; for whatever a man sows, this he will also reap. For the one who sows to his own flesh will from the flesh reap corruption, but the one who sows to the Spirit will from the Spirit reap eternal life. Let us not lose heart in doing good, for in due time we will reap if we do not grow weary. Galatians 6:7-9

As you learn to love and respond in love, rather than returning evil for evil or giving grief back when you have received grief, then you will reap love more and more. Loving another is a choice and a discipline just like any other virtue. The Lord loves us, fills us with His love and shows us how to love but we must act on what He has given us and shown us. The feelings of love come and go but the one who learns to love faithfully will reap love because He who promised is faithful. Do not grow weary or lose heart, for in time, you will be very thankful and you will see that what He says is true, if you are faithful.

Beloved, let us love one another, for love is from God; and everyone who loves is born of God and knows God. The one who does not love does not know God, for God is love. I John 4:7,8

If you want to have love in your marriage and in your relationships then you must have the One who is love in your life and marriage. Jesus Christ is God and came to show us real love and bring love into our lives and relationships. Ask Jesus Christ to come into your life today if you have not yet done so and He will bring, restore and rekindle the love in your life.

Behold, I stand at the door and knock; if anyone hears My voice and opens the door, I will come in to him and will dine with him, and he with Me.

Revelation 3:20

A Life with Love Can Grow Cold

Most couples when they get married their love for each other is fresh and very much alive. However, as time goes on if they are not careful then their love will grow cold towards each other. Often one of them will feel that they are not “in love” any more. More than anything else, that is not the problem, but rather they do not understand love. Love can be quenched, as fire can be quenched, and seems like it is not as alive as before. However, when one understands more about love then they discover, just as a fire can be rekindled so their love for their spouse can be rekindled if they will follow God’s instructions on rekindling their love.

Because lawlessness is increased, most people’s love will grow cold.

Matthew 24:12

Lawlessness can be simply defined as sin. When Adam and Eve disobeyed God then they were being lawless. They were wanting to live under their own law and not under God’s law. They thought that they knew better.

Everyone who practices sin also practices lawlessness; and sin is lawlessness. You know that He appeared in order to take away sins; and in Him there is no sin. No one who abides in Him sins; no one who sins has seen Him or knows Him. Little children, make sure no one deceives you; the one who practices righteousness is righteous, just as He is righteous; the one who practices sin is of the devil; for the devil has sinned from the beginning. The Son of God appeared for this purpose, to destroy the works of the devil. I John 3:4-8

The devil is the father of lawlessness and he is the one who deceived Eve into temptation and when she gave into temptation then she sinned. He wanted to destroy Eve, her relationship with God and her marriage and everything else that was precious to her. Jesus Christ came to take away our sins and to destroy the works of the devil. Satan, the devil, came to destroy and he still wants to destroy.

The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I came that they may have life, and have it abundantly. John10:10

Jesus Christ came to give you life and to bring love into all of your relationships. He wants to rekindle your love for Him and for your spouse and whoever else you may be estranged from that He designed for you to be in a relationship with here on earth.

Therefore humble yourselves under the mighty hand of God, that He may exalt you at the proper time, casting all your anxiety on Him, because He cares for you. Be of sober spirit, be on the alert. Your adversary, the devil, prowls around like a roaring lion, seeking someone to devour. But resist him, firm in your faith, I Peter 5:6-9a

The beginning of rekindling your heart to know love and to give love is to rekindle your relationship with the Lord if you belong to Him. If you have not yet given your life to Him then do it today. He will come and live within you and give you a new heart and a new love for your spouse and everyone else. This is what it means to humble yourself before the Lord, it is to say, ” I need you, Lord. I don’t know what is best for my life or for my marriage or whatever relationship it may be.” Please be my Lord and my Savior. He will hear that prayer. Then cast all of your anxiety on Him. He loves you. Next, be on the alert for the devil and resist Him through the name of the Lord Jesus Christ and His Word. The devil has to flee at His name and His Word. The name of Jesus Christ and His Word has authority over the devil because Jesus Christ defeated the devil at the cross. This is what that promise means that the Lord gave to Adam and Eve.

And I will put enmity
Between you and the woman,
And between your seed and her seed;
He shall bruise you on the head,
And you shall bruise him on the heel.” Genesis 3:15

Jesus Christ was the seed of the woman who bruised Satan on the head. Jesus Christ was the One whom God was sending into the world to defeat the devil and to destroy his works. Jesus Christ conquered on the cross the death that came through Adam and Eve’s sin in order that we might be reconciled back to God and live forever in His love. Since Jesus Christ so loved us we also can love one another. Love can be rekindled in relationships because of and through our relationship with Jesus Christ.

Beloved, if God so loved us, we also ought to love one another. I John 4:11

A Life with Love Overcomes Evil

The Lord says that we are never to repay evil for evil. One of the meanings of evil is to cause grief. When someone causes us grief then the temptation is to return grief to them.

Never pay back evil for evil to anyone. Romans 12:17a

The Lord says never to do return evil for evil but rather we are to overcome evil with good. This word good means the highest form of love. It always takes two to argue or fight. If one will refuse to return grief but chooses to give love rather than trying to hurt the one who has hurt them then there is no contention.

Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good. Romans 12:21

The Lord says that it is foolish to quarrel with one another. Keep away from strife and keep strife out of your marriage and family.

Keeping away from strife is an honor for a man,
But any fool will quarrel. Proverbs 20:3

The Bible describes a foolish person as one who consumes. They will consume you and your life if you allow them. Stay away from a fool. They only bring destruction to themselves and those whom they are around.

But if you bite and devour one another, take care that you are not consumed by one another. Galatians 5:15

Don’t even begin to quarrel. You both will say things that you will regret. You can not take back your words and your words destroy the one who you are supposed to love. After the argument is over then you have two defeated and sad people.

The beginning of strife is like letting out water, So abandon the quarrel before it breaks out. Proverbs 17:14

Turn to the Lord rather than turning away from Him. When there is a disagreement or someone has been hurt then be quick to ask forgiveness and to say that you are sorry. Humility goes a long way in healing hurts. Don’t be arrogant. There are always things that you do not know. The Lord is a present help in time of trouble.

An arrogant man stirs up strife, But he who trusts in the Lord will prosper. Proverbs 28:25

Love seeks reconciliation and gives grace rather than wanting the other person to be proven wrong and disgrace. Love covers a multitude of sins.

Hatred stirs up strife, But love covers all transgressions. Proverbs 10:12

You will discover as you show mercy to others then you both benefit. If you are not merciful then you do harm not only to the other person but to yourself as well.

The merciful man does himself good, But the cruel man does himself harm. Proverbs 11:17

The Lord is merciful to us and He does not give us what we deserve. Love others as the Lord has loved you.

We count those blessed who endured. You have heard of the endurance of Job and have seen the outcome of the Lord’s dealings, that the Lord is full of compassion and is merciful. James 5:11

Being a Christian means that we do not want to be controlled by our flesh and do what our flesh wants to do but we want to be controlled by God’s Spirit and we want to do as we ought.

But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control; against such things there is no law. Now those who belong to Christ Jesus have crucified the flesh with its passions and desires. Galatians 5:22-24

You will find that as you walk in God’s Spirit and live according to the power that He has given to you that you will be walking in obedience to Him. You will be fulfilling the Law by loving your neighbor as yourself. This will keep you from sinning and suffering the torment of regret and sadness of destroying those who you want to love the most. You will see that love overcomes evil and you will both be blessed.

For the whole Law is fulfilled in one word, in the statement, “You shall love your neighbor as yourself.” But if you bite and devour one another, take care that you are not consumed by one another. But I say, walk by the Spirit, and you will not carry out the desire of the flesh. For the flesh sets its desire against the Spirit, and the Spirit against the flesh; for these are in opposition to one another, so that you may not do the things that you please. Galatians 5:14-17

A Life with Love Gives Identity

Love is relational and relationships give identity. When a man gets a wife he becomes a husband and when a woman gets married she becomes a wife. A man becomes a father when he has a child and a woman becomes a mother when her baby is born. Love gives identity and purpose and meaning in life. Relationships define the people who are in them.

The man gave names to all the cattle, and to the birds of the sky, and to every beast of the field, but for Adam there was not found a helper suitable for him. So the Lord God caused a deep sleep to fall upon the man, and he slept; then He took one of his ribs and closed up the flesh at that place. The Lord God fashioned into a woman the rib which He had taken from the man, and brought her to the man. The man said, “This is now bone of my bones,
And flesh of my flesh;
She shall be called Woman,
Because she was taken out of Man.” Genesis 2:20-23

Man did not name himself until the Lord brought Eve to him. When he had finished naming the animals then the Lord brought Eve to him and Adam immediately recognized her and said, “this is now bone of my bones, and flesh of my flesh. She shall be called woman…” and then he called himself man. His identity came from his relationship with God and his relationship with Eve. God loved Adam and Adam loved Eve. Adam’s love for God was a response to God’s love for him and Eve’s love for her husband is a response of Adam’s love for Eve.

We love, because He first loved us. I John 4:19

Someone once said, “Women were created from the rib of man to be beside him, not from his head to top him, nor from his feet to be trampled by him, but from under his arm to be protected by him, near to his heart to be loved by him.”

For this reason a man shall leave his father and his mother, and be joined to his wife; and they shall become one flesh. And the man and his wife were both naked and were not ashamed. Genesis 2:24,25

Adam and Eve were the only part of creation that could receive and know God’s love because they were the only part of creation that had a spirit. Love is spiritual and man receives love through his spirit and experiences it through his soul and expresses it through his body. Adam and Eve became husband and wife and with their identity came meaning and purpose in life. Love brings fulfillment as we fulfill the purpose for which God created us. Adam and Eve needed each other to be the person and to do that which God had created them to do. Eve was to become a mother and once again she would receive a new identity and a new purpose in life.

The Lord God planted a garden toward the east, in Eden; and there He placed the man whom He had formed. Out of the ground the Lord God caused to grow every tree that is pleasing to the sight and good for food; Genesis 2:8,9a

Love provides what is good. The Lord was not only Adam’s Creator but his Provider. The Lord provided everything that Adam and Eve needed. He gave them a home in the garden of Eden and the Lord gave them each other to love and to be loved. He gave Adam work to do, for God made man to work and He called Eve to be a wife and a mother. He made Adam for the dust of the ground so he related to the world and his work involved the world. God made Eve from a person and a woman relates to people and so her work involved people. Adam and Eve lived in a perfect world with an identity and purpose. God’s love had given their lives meaning and fulfillment. They loved God and loved each other. If only…they would not eat from the tree of the knowledge of good and evil then they would live in this perfect state of love and harmony with God and each other forever.

“But he who sins against me injures himself;
All those who hate me love death.” Proverbs 8:36

The Lord has not changed. He is good and His plans for us are good. His design for marriage is good. If only we would keep His commandments and follow His instructions then we will live and our relationships will be filled with love. If only…we would not sin. It is sin that brings death to our relationships and marriages. It is sin that destroys all that is precious to us. When we sin against God then we hurt ourselves and if we hate what He says then we love death.

A Life with Love Can Be Found

Just as love can be lost, love also can be found. Those who find love, that is, true unconditional love, are never the same. Love changes a person. Love brings life to the spirit, soul and body of the one who finds love. Love is meant to be experienced. This is what it means to “know” love.

Beloved, let us love one another, for love is from God; and everyone who loves is born of God and knows God. The one who does not love does not know God, for God is love. I John 4:7,8

God is love and the one who knows God will also know love. Love is spiritual but is felt and experienced in the soul and expressed through the body. Adam and Eve had no love of their own apart from God.

Jesus answered and said to him, “Truly, truly, I say to you, unless one is born again he cannot see the kingdom of God.” John 3:3

Just as the Bible says that everyone who loves is born of God and knows God. One has to be born again to experience the love and the knowledge of God. Until one is born again he is still separated from knowing and experiencing the love that God has for him.

Nicodemus said to Him, “How can a man be born when he is old? He cannot enter a second time into his mother’s womb and be born, can he?” Jesus answered, “Truly, truly, I say to you, unless one is born of water and the Spirit he cannot enter into the kingdom of God. That which is born of the flesh is flesh, and that which is born of the Spirit is spirit. John 3:3-6

Just as the spirit of man died when Adam and Eve sinned so also his spirit must be made alive. Man is spiritually made alive when he becomes born again. For this reason, it is not enough to know about God’s love with the mind and even feel it with the emotions, unless we have been born again. It will only be an intellectual belief or an emotional faith until one is born again. When a person is born again, they are no longer separated from God but they have become restored in their relationship with God through the Spirit of God. God’s Spirit has become united with their spirit to make them spiritually alive. The born again one not only knows about the love of God but God’s Spirit has caused them to born again into God’s own family and they now have found and discovered God’s love for them personally. They have become a child of God and a recipient of God’s love forever.

Do not be amazed that I said to you, ‘You must be born again.’ John 3:7

There is no other way to find love than through being restored back into a love relationship with God through Jesus Christ. God sent Jesus Christ into the world that man might be restored to the love relationship that God had with Adam and Eve before they sinned. Jesus Christ did not come into the world to judge man but that man might be restored and know God’s love.

For God so loved the world, that He gave His only begotten Son, that whoever believes in Him shall not perish, but have eternal life. For God did not send the Son into the world to judge the world, but that the world might be saved through Him. John 3:16,17

When God saves a person, they are saved and restored in their spirit, soul and body. They are saved from eternal death and given life in these three areas. When one is born again he can now love and worship God in his spirit, love and pray with his spirit and his soul, and love and serve God with His spirit, soul and body. He has been given a new life in Christ and every area of him experiences the love of God in Christ Jesus. When someone is restored to God and finds God’s love then he has found the greatest treasure of all.

He who did not spare His own Son, but delivered Him over for us all, how will He not also with Him freely give us all things? Romans 8:32

Just as Adam and Eve lost everything pertaining to life when they sinned so also when one receives Jesus Christ into their life and is born again, they find not only love but everything else pertaining to life.

Jesus said to him, “I am the way, and the truth, and the life; no one comes to the Father but through Me. John 14:6