Category: Love in marriage

A Life with Love Does Not Judge

Judging someone is the opposite of loving someone. The Lord has not called us to judge but to love. There is only One Lawgiver and Judge.

There is only one Lawgiver and Judge, the One who is able to save and to destroy; but who are you who judge your neighbor? James 4:12

The Lord has called us to love the Lord our God with all of our heart, soul and mind and our neighbor as ourselves, that is, how we would want someone else to love us. We can not love and judge at the same time. When we are judging someone then we are presuming something about someone else when we do not have all of the facts. We are not all knowing. There is only One who is all knowing and He will judge righteously.

Do not speak against one another, brethren. He who speaks against a brother or judges his brother, speaks against the law and judges the law; but if you judge the law, you are not a doer of the law but a judge of it. James 4:11

The Lord has called us to be a doer of His word and not a judge of it. If we are only a hearer of the word and not a doer then we are only deceiving ourselves and His truth and love is not in us.

But prove yourselves doers of the word, and not merely hearers who delude themselves. James 1:22

When Adam and Eve sinned they became a judge of God and His Word and not a lover of God and a doer of His Word. They presumed about the Lord and His character and so they hid themselves.

They heard the sound of the Lord God walking in the garden in the cool of the day, and the man and his wife hid themselves from the presence of the Lord God among the trees of the garden. Then the Lord God called to the man, and said to him, “Where are you?” He said, “I heard the sound of You in the garden, and I was afraid because I was naked; so I hid myself.” Genesis 2:8-10

Adam was afraid because he know longer knew the Lord. His view of God became distorted because of his sin and Adam began making a judgment of God of what he thought God was like. Everything that you and I do is a response to our view of God. Everything that every person in the world does is a response to their view of God. For this reason, our greatest need is to have the correct view of God. God is not who we judge Him to be but God is who God is, whether we know Him or not. When the Bible uses the word “know” someone, it means an intimate knowledge of the person. Adam lost his intimacy with God when he sinned. He no longer knew Him and Adam’s judgment of God became twisted. God is not twisted but Adam’s view of God became distorted and twisted.

With the pure You show Yourself pure,
And with the crooked You show Yourself twisted. Psalm 18:26

Only God can cleanse our heart. Our heart becomes clean when we are forgiven of our sin. Only God can forgive us of our sin. Jesus Christ shed His blood on the cross to forgive us of our sin, to forgive us for wanting and trying to be like God. He came to forgive us of judging God and everyone else.

And according to the Law, one may almost say, all things are cleansed with blood, and without shedding of blood there is no forgiveness. Hebrews 9:22

The correct view of God will only come when our heart has been cleansed and is pure. A pure heart is a heart that by faith is single minded in its purpose to trust and obey God.

Draw near to God and He will draw near to you. Cleanse your hands, you sinners; and purify your hearts, you double-minded. James 4:8

The Lord wants to reveal Himself to all of us but He waits until we have drawn near to Him through faith, by His grace, and have had our hearts cleansed through the blood of Jesus Christ and what He did on the cross to forgive us of our sins. He took all of our sins and gave us all of His righteousness that we might once again be restored to a loving relationship with God and know God intimately.

Blessed are the pure in heart, for they shall see God. Matthew 5:8

A Life with Love is Relational

Love is about relationships. The Lord made us to be in a relationship with Him and in relationship with others. It is not good to alone. It is love that makes the relationships alive and meaningful and the relationships that we have define our lives. When Adam and Eve disobeyed God then their relationship with God changed and they changed.

When the woman saw that the tree was good for food,and that it was a delight to the eyes,and that the tree was desirable to make wise,she took from its fruit and ate;and she gave also to her husband with her,and he ate.Then the eyes of both of them were opened,and they knew that they were naked;and they sewed fig leaves together and made themselves loin coverings. Genesis 3:6,7

Sin always changes people and relationships. Something within us is destroyed and we no longer enjoy the freedom and security that we had before we sinned. Adam and Eve were ashamed and insecure. They tried to cover themselves up.

Righteousness exalts a nation,
But sin is a disgrace to any people. Proverbs 14:34

Sin also makes us fearful. The only problem was that there was nothing that they needed to be afraid of but sin distorts reality in our mind and we start responding not to the Lord and His Word but to our fears. When we respond to our fears then our life becomes anxious and even more insecure. Those who obey the Lord have no need to fear. They know the Lord and have put their trust in Him.

“Blessed is the man who trusts in the Lord
And whose trust is the Lord.
“For he will be like a tree planted by the water,
That extends its roots by a stream
And will not fear when the heat comes;
But its leaves will be green,
And it will not be anxious in a year of drought
Nor cease to yield fruit. Jeremiah 17:7,8

Sin brings guilt and guilt changes our thoughts and our actions. The guilt in our lives will change the path that we take so that we can avoid any reminder of the guilt. God made man so that he can not live without love and in the same way, God made man so that he can not live with guilt. Man will do anything that he can to try to get rid of the guilt or to block it out. Since man can not get rid of his own guilt, his actions only lead to more guilt. It is a horrible life.

The way of a guilty man is crooked,
But as for the pure, his conduct is upright. Proverbs 21:8

The path of the guilty is no longer straight but it is crooked. His conduct becomes even more crooked just as the saying goes, “the leg of a lie gets longer and longer”. The guilt in a person’s life will twist their view of everything. They will no longer see clearly and will become suspicious of even those who have done them no wrong. Even their view of God becomes distorted.

With the kind You show Yourself kind;
With the blameless You show Yourself blameless;
With the pure You show Yourself pure,
And with the crooked You show Yourself twisted. Psalm 18:25,26

The Lord is good and loving. He is kind and blameless. However, to the guilty and crooked person He becomes twisted in their mind and eyes. The most important thing in a person’s life is their view of God. Everything that man does is a response to his view of God. God is not who you think that He is, He is who He is and He reveals Himself to those who seek Him with a pure heart. The view that you have of God is not an indication of who He is but it is more an indication of the purity of your heart.

Blessed are the pure in heart, for they shall see God. Matthew 5:8

There is only One who can take your sin and guilt away and give you a clean heart and that is Jesus Christ.

The next day he saw Jesus coming to him and said, “Behold, the Lamb of God who takes away the sin of the world! John 1:29

He came to earth, died on the cross and rose again to take the punishment that all of us deserve, to forgive us of our sin and to restore us to a relationship with God.

For Christ also died for sins once for all, the just for the unjust, so that He might bring us to God, I Peter 3:18a

A Life with Love Asks Where

When Adam and Eve sinned the Lord did not express any anger with them. He did not take it personally. He did not do anything wrong but it was Adam and Eve that had done wrong. The Lord asked questions. This is a great example of how a parent should be.

But the glory of kings is to search out a matter. Proverbs 25:2

A king is a picture of one who is in authority and responsible for those under him. If you are in a leadership position over someone then you need to ask questions and seek out the matter when someone has done wrong. Don’t ignore it, hoping that it will go away. It will only get worse.

Then the Lord God called to the man, and said to him, “Where are you?” Genesis 3:9

The Lord has called parents to teach their children the ways of the Lord. Parents need to know where their child is spiritually, mentally, emotionally and physically. If they don’t know then they need to ask questions. “Where are you?” is a great beginning. When the child knows the parent cares where they are then the child will care where they go.

Like arrows in the hand of a warrior, So are the children of one’s youth. How blessed is the man whose quiver is full of them; Psalm 127:4

It is the responsibility of the parent to send their child out. How an arrow flies is determined by the archer and the character of the arrow. A wise parent knows how far their child is ready to go and a good parent also knows the character of their child. Every child has their own unique strengths and weaknesses and so that particular child may not be ready for a certain challenging situation whereas another child would not be tempted and fail. If you know where your child is then you know where your child can go. A wise parent sets their child up for success.

Then it happened in the spring, at the time when kings go out to battle, that David sent Joab and his servants with him and all Israel, and they destroyed the sons of Ammon and besieged Rabbah. But David stayed at Jerusalem. Now when evening came David arose from his bed and walked around on the roof of the king’s house, and from the roof he saw a woman bathing; and the woman was very beautiful in appearance. So David sent and inquired about the woman. And one said, “Is this not Bathsheba, the daughter of Eliam, the wife of Uriah the Hittite?” David sent messengers and took her, and when she came to him, he lay with her; and when she had purified herself from her uncleanness, she returned to her house. The woman conceived; and she sent and told David, and said, “I am pregnant.” II Samuel 11:1-5

Loyalty and faithfulness are some of the most important character qualities and they are more easily developed in a child when he is young. King David got into trouble and sinned because he was not where he was supposed to be at the appointed time. It was time for the kings to be out to battle. David did not go. The spring was the rainy season and it would have been more comfortable to stay at home where it was warm and dry. A parent must model and teach loyalty and faithfulness through their own actions.

He who pursues righteousness and loyalty finds life, righteousness and honor. Proverbs 21:21

When you teach your child to do what is right, to be faithful to where they should be and to be loyal to those whom the Lord has put them under then you are setting them up to be successful, to live life to the fullest and to receive honor.

Loyalty and truth preserve the king, And he upholds his throne by righteousness. Proverbs 20:28

A parent is equipping their child to be a leader when that parent teaches the child truth and loyalty to living out the truth.

For I delight in loyalty rather than sacrifice,
And in the knowledge of God rather than burnt offerings.
But like Adam they have transgressed the covenant;
There they have dealt treacherously against Me. Hosea 6:6,7

The Lord delights in the loyalty of His people rather than in their religious traditions and rituals. Adam was not loyal to the Lord when he sinned and did not obey the command of the Lord. Disloyalty will bring more heartache, sorrow and regret than one can imagine. Many a son or daughter has gotten in trouble just by being in the wrong place at the wrong time. A parent needs to know where their child is all of the time. If a child can not be trusted and “might” do something that would bring greater destruction then a wise parent will create boundaries for their child’s good until their character is formed and they can be trusted. It is the responsibility of the parent to bring the arrow back and work on the character of the arrow so that the arrow will fly straight.

Then the Lord God said, “Behold, the man has become like one of Us, knowing good and evil; and now, he might stretch out his hand, and take also from the tree of life, and eat, and live forever”— therefore the Lord God sent him out from the garden of Eden, Genesis 3:22,23a

The Lord God could no longer trust Adam and Eve since they had disobeyed. He knew that since they ate of the one tree then they “might” eat of the tree of life and if they did eat of the tree of life then they would live forever in their sinful state and forever be separated from God. It was God’s love for them that created this new boundary to protect them from further grief.

A Life with Love Restores

Love seeks restoration of the relationship and reconciliation between those in the relationship. When Adam and Eve sinned and the fellowship with God was broken the Lord immediately began seeking restoration by promising a provision to allow them to be reconciled to Him. The seed which would come through the woman would be the Messiah who would bring restoration. This is the first promise concerning Jesus Christ.

The Lord God said to the serpent, “Because you have done this,
Cursed are you more than all cattle,
And more than every beast of the field;
On your belly you will go,
And dust you will eat
All the days of your life;
And I will put enmity
Between you and the woman,
And between your seed and her seed;
He shall bruise you on the head,
And you shall bruise him on the heel.” Genesis 3:14,15

Love continues to love even when the one who loves has been wronged. God’s love did not change for Adam and Eve. Love is creative and seeks another solution to the brokenness so that the relationship may be restored. God would one day send His only begotten Son so that man could be reconciled to God.

And not only this, but we also exult in God through our Lord Jesus Christ, through whom we have now received the reconciliation. Romans 5:11

Jesus Christ came to reconcile us to God and to restore the broken relationship caused by sin. Love seeks reconciliation not justice. When someone wants justice then they want someone to pay for their wrongdoings. If there is love in a relationship then the one who has been wronged will want reconciliation and restoration. The Lord does not reward us according to our sins.

He has not dealt with us according to our sins,
Nor rewarded us according to our iniquities. Psalm 103:10

When Adam and Eve sinned they had to die because the Lord said that would be the consequence of their disobedience. He had to be faithful to His Word just as a parent needs to be faithful when they are disciplining a child to enforce the consequences, otherwise, the child will not respect the parent.

The Lord God commanded the man, saying, “From any tree of the garden you may eat freely; but from the tree of the knowledge of good and evil you shall not eat, for in the day that you eat from it you will surely die.” Genesis 2:16,17

However, He showed them mercy in clothing them and providing for them. Love continues to love even if there are consequences. Love does not give up. The Lord did not give up on Adam and Eve. He loved them and love does not deal with us according to our sins or reward us according to our iniquities.

The Lord God made garments of skin for Adam and his wife, and clothed them. Genesis 3:21

In all relationships there comes a time when someone is hurt, either intentionally or unintentionally. We are all sinners and eventually we will hurt the ones we love. To hurt someone is to cause grief to another. One of the meanings of the word “evil” is to cause grief. The only time in the Bible when the Lord says to “never” do something in the command form is when He says to “never return evil for evil” or He says the same thing in another way, “never take your own revenge”.

Never pay back evil for evil to anyone. Respect what is right in the sight of all men. If possible, so far as it depends on you, be at peace with all men. Never take your own revenge, Romans 12:17-19a

If you want to have a great marriage and a great life then apply this truth to your life. It takes two people for a marriage to fail. Both people are always at fault when a marriage fails. There is no innocent person. If you never return grief when you are hurt then you will receive a blessing. It is not a blessing if your marriage fails for it will only bring more sorrow and shame. It is not God’s design for any marriage to end in divorce.

To sum up, all of you be harmonious, sympathetic, brotherly, kindhearted, and humble in spirit; not returning evil for evil or insult for insult, but giving a blessing instead; for you were called for the very purpose that you might inherit a blessing. I Peter 3:8,9

The Lord will bless you and He will hear your prayers. The Lord will fight for you to keep your marriage together and He will deal with the one who is causing the grief.

For, “The one who desires life, to love and see good days,
Must keep his tongue from evil and his lips from speaking deceit.
“He must turn away from evil and do good;
He must seek peace and pursue it.
“For the eyes of the Lord are toward the righteous,
And His ears attend to their prayer,
But the face of the Lord is against those who do evil.” I Peter 3:10-12

Do you want to truly live? Do you want to find love and keep love in your life? Do you want to see good days that are filled with much joy, great peace, harmony and much love? Then keep your tongue from evil and your lips from being deceitful. Turn away from evil. Do not hurt those who hurt you but seek to be a blessing to them. Do good when it is in your power to do it. Seek peace and pursue it.

Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good. Romans 12:21

When you live according to God’s ways then you will be like God and you will be called a child of God for He Himself is kind to evil and ungrateful people.

But love your enemies, and do good, and lend, expecting nothing in return; and your reward will be great, and you will be sons of the Most High; for He Himself is kind to ungrateful and evil men. Luke 6:35

A Life with Love Does Not Keep Accounts

Love does not keep an account of the wrong done nor does love reward according to our wrongs. When Adam and Eve sinned the Lord could have turned His back on them. He made it clear to them that they were not to eat of the tree of the knowledge of good and evil and yet, they went against Him and ate. The first consequence of their sin was that they were naked. This nakedness was different than the earlier nakedness of before they sinned. Before they sinned they were clothed with God’s glory and His light. They were not ashamed. After they sinned they were ashamed because of their nakedness. Even in their sinful, vulnerable state the Lord provided for them.

The Lord God made garments of skin for Adam and his wife, and clothed them. Genesis 3:21

Even then after Adam and Eve sinned the Lord began covering their shame. Love seeks to give grace and does not want to see disgrace or shame happen to another, even when they have done wrong. When Joseph thought Mary had done him wrong by being unfaithful the Bible says that Joseph was a righteous man and did not want to disgrace her. Love covers shame rather than make another’s shame known to others.

Now the birth of Jesus Christ was as follows: when His mother Mary had been betrothed to Joseph, before they came together she was found to be with child by the Holy Spirit. And Joseph her husband, being a righteous man and not wanting to disgrace her, planned to send her away secretly. Matthew 1:18,19

Love does not repeat sins to either the one who sinned or to others. Love forgives.

Love is patient, love is kind and is not jealous; love does not brag and is not arrogant, does not act unbecomingly; it does not seek its own, is not provoked, does not take into account a wrong suffered, does not rejoice in unrighteousness, but rejoices with the truth; bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. I Corinthians 13:4-7

Especially in relationships, repeating a wrong will destroy the relationship and any intimacy that is there. We have all sinned and no one wants to be reminded of their failures.

He who conceals a transgression seeks love,
But he who repeats a matter separates intimate friends. Proverbs 17:9

When someone turns to the Lord He says that He separates their sins from them as far as the east is from the west. Since the east and west never meet then we will never have to meet up with our sins if we have trusted in the blood of Jesus Christ to forgive us and cleanse us from our sin.

As far as the east is from the west, So far has He removed our transgressions from us. Psalm 103:12

As the Lord has forgiven us we are to forgive others. Only one who has experienced the love and forgiveness of God can live this way. There is no sweeter life than to be free from remembering the sins of others and having the power to forgive others as we have been forgiven. If He forgives and never brings up our sins again then we also ought to do the same with others. Love forgives and does not keep an account of wrongs suffered.

A Life with Love Pays a Price

When Adam and Eve sinned in the garden then they brought a curse on themselves. The curse was the consequence of their disobedience and if they will not fight it but submit to the new boundary, which the curse brought, then it would keep them from sinning some more which would bring even more curses. Sin brings a curse. To be set free from the curse someone else had to take the curse that Adam and Eve brought on themselves by their own sin.

To the woman He said,
“I will greatly multiply
Your pain in childbirth,
In pain you will bring forth children;
Yet your desire will be for your husband,
And he will rule over you.”

Then to Adam He said, “Because you have listened to the voice of your wife, and have eaten from the tree about which I commanded you, saying, ‘You shall not eat from it’;

Cursed is the ground because of you;
In toil you will eat of it
All the days of your life.
“Both thorns and thistles it shall grow for you;
And you will eat the plants of the field;
By the sweat of your face
You will eat bread,
Till you return to the ground,
Because from it you were taken;
For you are dust,
And to dust you shall return.” Genesis 3:16-19

All of us have sinned against God by not obeying His voice and keeping His Law. All of us have received what we deserve and that is the curse of sin and death.

Indeed all Israel has transgressed Your law and turned aside, not obeying Your voice; so the curse has been poured out on us, along with the oath which is written in the law of Moses the servant of God, for we have sinned against Him. Daniel 9:11

Jesus Christ paid the price to redeem us from the curse of the Law and of sin and death. He who did no wrong became sin for us that He might set us free from the power of sin and the fear of death.

Christ redeemed us from the curse of the Law, having become a curse for us—for it is written, “Cursed is everyone who hangs on a tree”— Galatians 3:13

Jesus Christ redeemed us with His blood through His death on a cross.

knowing that you were not redeemed with perishable things like silver or gold from your futile way of life inherited from your forefathers, but with precious blood, as of a lamb unblemished and spotless, the blood of Christ.

I Peter 1:18,19

We are under the curse that God gave to Adam and Eve until Jesus Christ returns to rule on earth and those who know Him will rule with Him. The Lord gives grace to the wife to allow her husband to rule over her and to bear children in pain. The Lord gives the man grace to work and toil even though there are weeds in every field of work. If man and woman will not complain but thank the Lord for the reminder of the consequences of sin then they will receive a blessing. It is humbling for a wife to allow her husband to rule over her and it is humbling for a man to work with the weeds. This humbling though keeps them looking to the Lord who loves them and is a present help in time of trouble. It is when we rebel against the boundaries that the Lord has put in our life that makes our life difficult. One day we will be set free from these curses. Until then we must learn to trust and obey the Lord.

Then he showed me a river of the water of life, clear as crystal, coming from the throne of God and of the Lamb, in the middle of its street. On either side of the river was the tree of life, bearing twelve kinds of fruit, yielding its fruit every month; and the leaves of the tree were for the healing of the nations. There will no longer be any curse; and the throne of God and of the Lamb will be in it, and His bond-servants will serve Him; they will see His face, and His name will be on their foreheads. And there will no longer be any night; and they will not have need of the light of a lamp nor the light of the sun, because the Lord God will illumine them; and they will reign forever and ever. Revelation 22:1-5

The Lord invites all to come to Him and to come into a relationship with Him. If any are enslaved to sin or are afraid of death then let him come to Jesus Christ who is life and Jesus Christ will come into their life and fellowship with them. Those who overcome through Christ will reign with Him in the age to come. We come by faith, trusting in His Word and His promises. He said He is coming back. Once He comes back it will be too late to come to Him. We come by faith now.

Behold, I stand at the door and knock; if anyone hears My voice and opens the door, I will come in to him and will dine with him, and he with Me. He who overcomes, I will grant to him to sit down with Me on My throne, as I also overcame and sat down with My Father on His throne. Revelation 3:20,21

A Life with Love Hears Voice of Love

When Adam and Eve lived in the garden before they sinned they heard God’s voice. It was the voice of comfort and the voice of a loving God who cared for them. They exchanged the voice of a loving God to hear the voices of their own accusations. When the love is gone in relationships then blame and accusations come in. Where there is sin there will also be blame and accusations.

And He said, “Who told you that you were naked? Have you eaten from the tree of which I commanded you not to eat?” The man said, “The woman whom You gave to be with me, she gave me from the tree, and I ate.” Genesis 3:11,12

Confession and repentance is taking the blame of one’s own sin. No one can make us sin. Adam sinned on his own. Eve did not make him sin. He knew that what he was doing was wrong.

And it was not Adam who was deceived, but the woman being deceived, fell into transgression. I Timothy 2:14

When we know the right thing to do and we do not do it then we have sinned. Adam knew the right thing to do but he did not do it.

Therefore, to one who knows the right thing to do and does not do it, to him it is sin. James 4:17

Sin blocks us from hearing God’s voice. Sin blocks us from knowing God’s presence. Sin blocks us from experiencing God’s love. It was not until our sin was taken away that we could once again hear God’s voice, know His presence and experience His love.

The next day he saw Jesus coming to him and said, “Behold, the Lamb of God who takes away the sin of the world! John 1:29

Those who receive Jesus Christ, the Lamb of God, have their sin taken away and are no longer separated from God. They can hear His voice, know His presence and experience His love. They are born again and become His child. The relationship that was lost in the garden when Adam and Eve sinned is once again restored through Jesus Christ and His death and resurrection.

But as many as received Him, to them He gave the right to become children of God, even to those who believe in His name, who were born, not of blood nor of the will of the flesh nor of the will of man, but of God. John 1:12,13

They hear His voice because He also becomes their Good Shepherd.

My sheep hear My voice, and I know them, and they follow Me; and I give eternal life to them, and they will never perish; and no one will snatch them out of My hand. John 10:27,28

Jesus came so that Satan could never again snatch those who become His children away through deception or sin or any other means. Once someone becomes His child then they will never perish and be lost again. He holds them in His hand and no one can snatch them our of His hand. One way of knowing if you are God’s child is that you will want to follow Jesus and obey Him.

A Life with Love Must Be Established

For love to last in any relationship then it must be established on the foundation of God’s Word and the knowledge of Him.

By wisdom a house is built,
And by understanding it is established;
Proverbs 24:3

Relationships and especially marriages must be built, they do not just happen. They are like a house and must have a solid foundation, which is the Lord and His Word, and they must be built according to God’s blueprint. Wisdom comes from fearing the Lord and keeping His Word. As you do this then you will learn His ways, which is His wisdom and you will grow in understanding.

The fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom,
And the knowledge of the Holy One is understanding. Proverbs 9:10

Wisdom is knowing how to apply the knowledge that you need in any given situation. The knowledge that you need comes from the Lord and He gives those who fear Him the wisdom of what to do on how to achieve a desired result, such as, a strong marriage or strong friendship. As you learn to walk in His ways and live according to His wisdom then you will gain understanding as you grow in the knowledge of the Lord. The more you know Him then the more you will want to know Him. The same is true with God’s wisdom. The more you live according to His wisdom the more you will want His wisdom and everything in your life to be according to His ways.

But the wisdom from above is first pure, then peaceable, gentle, reasonable, full of mercy and good fruits, unwavering, without hypocrisy. James 3:17

God’s wisdom is pure and peaceable. It is gentle, reasonable, full of mercy and good fruits. God’s wisdom is also unwavering and without hypocrisy and this is what will characterize your life, your marriage and your relationships when you build them on God’s Word. You will find love, your life will be filled with love and you will keep love. As time goes on it will get even better because love grows and deepens with time.

But if any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask of God, who gives to all generously and without reproach, and it will be given to him. James 1:5

We all need wisdom and this promise that the Lord gives is one of His amazing promises and is a picture of His grace. He says that He will give wisdom to anyone who will ask Him and He will give it generously. He also says that He will not reproach you, which means that He will not reproach you for your lack of wisdom but rather He has been wanting you to ask Him for wisdom so that He can give it to you. Do you need wisdom in your relationships? Ask Him and He will give it to you. It is much better to have wisdom and to do it right from the beginning rather than wait for things to go wrong and then need wisdom. However, either way, He will give you His wisdom to build your marriage right and He will give you wisdom to correct the problems when things go wrong if you will ask Him.

And by knowledge the rooms are filled
With all precious and pleasant riches. Proverbs 24:4

You will find that as you build your life, relationships and marriage on God’s wisdom and it is established on understanding then the days will be filled with all precious and pleasant riches. Your cup will overflow with much blessing and great joy. Your life and your marriage will be a blessing to many.

A Life with Love is Good

Love is good and one of the meanings of the word “good” in the Bible is “the highest form of love”. The Lord is good and He only seeks what is good for us and His actions towards us are the highest expressions of love. When He created man He created man to be loved and to love.

For the Lord is good;
His lovingkindness is everlasting
And His faithfulness to all generations. Psalm 100:5

When God sent His only begotten Son into the world it was to show His love for the world. His redeeming love was sacrificial, costly, of great value and of the highest form. Jesus Christ died for us while we were sinners and had no love for Him or desire to trust and obey Him.

But God demonstrates His own love toward us, in that while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us. Romans 5:8

The Lord is good and no evil dwells with Him. Evil is the opposite of love and those who do evil seek to hurt, harm and to cause grief.

For You are not a God who takes pleasure in wickedness;
No evil dwells with You. Psalm 5:4

The devil is the one who is evil and seeks your harm and hurt. He is a liar and will do what he can to bring you grief. He lied to Eve.

The serpent said to the woman, “You surely will not die! For God knows that in the day you eat from it your eyes will be opened, and you will be like God, knowing good and evil.” Genesis 3:4,5

He said that she would not die but that her eyes would be opened and she would be like God. Every word was a lie. She would die and her actions brought about her own death. Satan always tries to minimize the consequences.

For the wages of sin is death, but the free gift of God is eternal life in Christ Jesus our Lord. Romans 6:23

He said that her eyes would be opened but rather she became blind and it was not until Jesus Christ came to open the eyes of the blind, that we could see spiritually.

Then the eyes of the blind will be opened Isaiah 35:5a

He said that she would be like God, but no, she became like the devil, for the devil did not do what was right in the sight of God and unrighteousness was found in him. The devil rebelled against God by doing what he wanted to do rather than what the Lord wanted him to do.

“You were blameless in your ways
From the day you were created
Until unrighteousness was found in you. Ezekiel 28:15

He said that she would know good and evil, but she no longer knew what was good but only what was evil. She no longer knew God’s love for her. The word “know” is to experience. She no longer experienced God’s love. The devil lied about God for God does not “experience” any evil and as long as Adam and Eve did what the Lord wanted them to do then they also would never “know” evil.

Your eyes are too pure to approve evil, And You can not look on wickedness Habakkuk 1:13

Eve exchanged the truth of God for a lie and the consequences of her actions brought death to her life and her relationship with Adam. The love that God had given them was no longer in the relationship as God was no longer present.

A Life with Love Does What is Right

When Adam and Eve were in the garden of Eden before they sinned they did not need any rules other than the one that the Lord had given to them. They loved God and they loved each other. Their love was perfect for God and for each other because their hearts were pure. They had never known any evil.

The Lord God commanded the man, saying, “From any tree of the garden you may eat freely; but from the tree of the knowledge of good and evil you shall not eat, for in the day that you eat from it you will surely die.” Genesis 2:16,17

If Adam and Eve had never sinned then they would not have ever needed any more rules or laws to live by. The Lord only gives commandments for our good and our protection. He does not give us commandments to deprive us of anything that would be good for us. The Lord knew that it would not be good for Adam and Eve to come into the knowledge of evil. They would lose their innocence and purity. They would be tempted in ways that the Lord never designed for them to be tempted. The Lord gives the same commandment in the New Testament and that is to not have the knowledge of evil.

For the report of your obedience has reached to all; therefore I am rejoicing over you, but I want you to be wise in what is good and innocent in what is evil. Romans 16:19

The Lord wants us to wise in what is good but innocent in what is evil. We need to be mature in our thinking but babies in the knowledge of evil.

Brethren, do not be children in your thinking; yet in evil be infants, but in your thinking be mature. I Corinthians 14:20

When we become knowledgeable in evil then our thinking has become defiled by what we have seen or heard. When our thinking has become impure then we are not holy in our behavior. One sin always leads to another if we do not repent. The Lord has commanded us to be holy, which means that we are to be separate from the world and do what is right in God’s sight. Then we will be available for the Lord to use us.

As obedient children, do not be conformed to the former lusts which were yours in your ignorance, but like the Holy One who called you, be holy yourselves also in all your behavior; because it is written, “You shall be holy, for I am holy.”

I Peter 1:14-16

When we are holy then the world will know that Jesus Christ is Lord.

I will vindicate the holiness of My great name which has been profaned among the nations, which you have profaned in their midst. Then the nations will know that I am the Lord,” declares the Lord God, “when I prove Myself holy among you in their sight. Ezekiel 36:23

When we compromise and do not do what is right then we have lost the power and influence in the world that God designed for us to have with the people who have yet to come to know Him. When those who know God sin then the world may say, “they are no different than me” or “they do the same things that I do so I do not have to listen to what they say”.

Like a trampled spring and a polluted well, Is a righteous man who gives way before the wicked. Proverbs 25:26

Before Adam and Eve sinned they were holy. They lost their holiness and they lost their power. The Lord Jesus Christ came to make us holy. He wants us to be innocent in what is evil. The less we know of evil the less we will sin. The more we know of evil then the more we will sin. Evil does not destroy us unless we do it. There is a difference between evil being done to us and being around evil against our will and us voluntarily learning about evil through entertainment or deceiving ourselves by saying “there is some good in this book, movie, etc.” even though there is also the knowledge of evil. You are subjecting yourself to evil when you voluntarily learn about it through compromise. You are bringing destruction to yourself. When you bring destruction to yourself then you are also bringing destruction to anyone with whom you are in a relationship and especially a marriage relationship. The Lord loves us and gives us instructions and commandments to protect us from destroying ourselves and each other. Love keeps His commandments.

and you shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, and with all your soul, and with all your mind, and with all your strength.’ The second is this, ‘You shall love your neighbor as yourself.’ There is no other commandment greater than these.” Mark 12:30,31

When you love the Lord your God with all of your heart, soul, mind and strength and your neighbor as yourself then you will have fulfilled all of God’s commandments. You will have loved and done what is right in God’s sight. You will be holy in all your behavior. Your life will have power and evil will not destroy you.

the power of an indestructible life. Hebrews 7:16