Author: instructionstoayounglife.com

When I was younger I read in the Bible that the Lord came to give me an abundant life and also that if I would trust Him then I would never be disappointed. These were incredible promises and so I decided to see if they were true. That was almost fifty years ago. What I have written are the truths that the Lord has taught me through His Word and I found them to be true every time. The Bible is the lecture and life is the lab. If a truth does not hold up in the lab then it can not be counted on. Every one was true and I have sought to build my life on these truths. We have a family business and four adult children. I wish that I could give my life to everyone but since I can't, I can share the truths that kept me from needless stress and pain. My marriage is the closest thing to heaven on earth. We are more "in love" than ever before and our children bring us great joy. I realize that not everyone will agree with everything that is written. I did not always agree either until I put it to the test. The Bible says that "wisdom will be vindicated by her deeds". The fruit from these truths have been sweet for me. May you be richly blessed as I have been. If you are struggling with life or with finding and keeping love in your life then please consider reading these posts. They have been tested and are true. If you are not happy and satisfied with life or what you have been doing has not been "working" then please consider what is written in these blogs. https://www.instructionstoayounglife.com is about how to live a life full of meaning, purpose, happiness with peace, quietness and confidence. https://www.howtofindandkeeplove.com is about the greatest love story in history. If you are looking for love and wanting to keep love in your life then please read this blog. These truths and this same love is offered to any who are willing to listen and learn. https://www.adviceforwomenaboutmen.com or https://www.adviceforgirlsaboutboys.com is practical advice on how a girl is to relate to a young man and how a woman is to relate to a man. It is a blog on how to keep from getting hurt and how to have a great love life. If you have any questions then please email me at fafeja@yahoo.com

A Life with Love Makes a Promise

Love makes promises and lives by the promise. It is not loving for a man to live with a woman outside of marriage. A woman needs, desires and longs for security. If a man loves a woman then he will give her that security. He does so through a promise. A marriage proposal is a promise to love her and to provide for her and protect her. When he marries her then he begins to fulfill the promise that he has made to her.

I establish My covenant with you; and all flesh shall never again be cut off by the water of the flood, neither shall there again be a flood to destroy the earth.” God said, “This is the sign of the covenant which I am making between Me and you and every living creature that is with you, for all successive generations; I set My bow in the cloud, and it shall be for a sign of a covenant between Me and the earth. It shall come about, when I bring a cloud over the earth, that the bow will be seen in the cloud, and I will remember My covenant, which is between Me and you and every living creature of all flesh; and never again shall the water become a flood to destroy all flesh. When the bow is in the cloud, then I will look upon it, to remember the everlasting covenant between God and every living creature of all flesh that is on the earth.” And God said to Noah, “This is the sign of the covenant which I have established between Me and all flesh that is on the earth.” Genesis 9:11-17

The Lord loved Noah and all of mankind and made a promise to Noah and his descendants that He would never destroy mankind through a flood again. This promise was God’s love to give mankind security so that man would not be fearful when the rain would come again. The rainbow was the sign of God’s promise never to flood the earth again. The wedding ring that a man gives to a woman when he marries her is a sign of his love for her that he will be faithful to her and love her. She need not be fearful when the storms of life come because of her husband’s promise to her to love her for better or for worse, for richer or for poorer, and in sickness and in health. He will love her all the days of their lives as long as the two of them shall live.

I can do all things through Him who strengthens me. Phillipians 4:13

We can only do what God has called us to do and be who God has called us to be by His strength and grace. Marriage humbles the husband and the wife because they both must look to Him and rely on His strength for the marriage to grow strong and loving.

Two are better than one because they have a good return for their labor. For if either of them falls, the one will lift up his companion. But woe to the one who falls when there is not another to lift him up. Furthermore, if two lie down together they keep warm, but how can one be warm alone? And if one can overpower him who is alone, two can resist him. A cord of three strands is not quickly torn apart. Ecclesiastes 4:9-12

Marriage is one of God’s provisions for productivity and also from discouragement. Two are better than one and will have a good return for their labor. When one falls the other can lift the other one up. It is a comfort to sleep together with your spouse and especially on cold nights. However, when the Lord is the center of your marriage then your marriage will grow stronger and stronger and even more loving. There is grace that gives forgiveness and there will be reconciliation when one fails and a love that is restored and grows.

And He has said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for power is perfected in weakness.” II Corinthians 12:9a

The Lord will give His grace to the husband and the wife to fulfill the vows they made to God and the promises they made to each other on their wedding day. Marriage takes a lot of humility and grace but it is worth it. It is our pride that destroys our relationships and marriages.

and all of you, clothe yourselves with humility toward one another, for God is opposed to the proud, but gives grace to the humble. I Peter 5:5b

A Life that is Submissive

Submission is what described the life of our Lord. He was entirely submissive to the Father. A life of submission is a sweet life if understood correctly. It is when truths are distorted that we struggle. Submission is the correct response to authority. Jesus is our Lord and our Savior. Lordship means that we are in submission to His rule and authority. He has appointed others to be in authority over us and we are to submit to them. Submission is expressed through obedience.

Philippians 2:8 Being found in appearance as a man, He humbled Himself by becoming obedient to the point of death, even death on a cross.

We are to first submit ourselves to God.

James 4:7 Submit therefore to God. Resist the devil and he will flee from you.

We are to submit ourselves to the governing authorities in whatever human institution the Lord has us serving, whether it is in school or on a job or the local civil authority.

I Peter 2:13 Submit yourselves for the Lord’s sake to every human institution, whether to a king as the one in authority,

We are to submit ourselves to our spiritual leaders who have been entrusted with responsibility to oversee our spiritual well being, for they will give an account.

Hebrews 13:17 Obey your leaders and submit to them, for they keep watch over your souls as those who will give an account. Let them do this with joy and not with grief, for this would be unprofitable for you.

When you get married or if you are married now then you are to submit to your husband. Of course it may seem easier to submit to a loving, Christian husband but if you are not married to a Christian then the commandment does not change, you are still to submit to him. God’s grace is sufficient for keeping His commandments.

I Peter 3:1 In the same way, you wives, be submissive to your own husbands so that even if any of them are disobedient to the word, they may be won without a word by the behavior of their wives,

You are not obligated to submit to the husbands of other women but only to your own husband.

I Peter 3:5,6 For in this way in former times the holy women also, who hoped in God, used to adorn themselves, being submissive to their own husbands; just as Sarah obeyed Abraham, calling him lord, and you have become her children if you do what is right without being frightened by any fear.

The word “lord” in this verse is the same word as “Lord” in reference to Jesus Christ. The word is kureos. Your husband is your kureos and Jesus Christ is your Kureos. They both exercise lordship over you and are to be respected for their position. One is God and the other is man. One you see and obey him and the other you can not see but obey Him.

Genesis 12:11-13 It came about when he came near to Egypt, that he said to Sarai his wife, “See now, I know that you are a beautiful woman; and when the Egyptians see you, they will say, ‘This is his wife’; and they will kill me, but they will let you live. Please say that you are my sister so that it may go well with me because of you, and that I may live on account of you.”

Abram asked Sarai to say that she was his sister so that his life would not be in danger. Sarai obeyed her husband without being frightened by fear. It is when fear controls us that we take matters into our own hands and disobey God. The Lord protected Sarai because she was submissive to her husband. He did not allow any harm to come to her.

Genesis 12:17 But the Lord struck Pharaoh and his house with great plagues because of Sarai, Abram’s wife.

Only a person who knows her God and is secure in Him can live this kind of life. He will protect the one who takes refuge in Him and obeys Him.

Psalm 125:3 For the scepter of wickedness shall not rest upon the land of the righteous, So that the righteous will not put forth their hands to do wrong.

This verse means that God will not allow His people to do wrong because they represent Him and He rules with uprightness.

Psalm 45:6 Your throne, O God, is forever and ever; A scepter of uprightness is the scepter of Your kingdom.

The Lord also rules over all who are in authority. No one has any authority unless it has been given it ti him from God.

Psalm 103:19 The Lord has established His throne in the heavens, And His sovereignty rules over all.

A Life with Love Must Be Tested

If love is not tested then we will never know the depth and strength of our love. It is not until our love is tested will we know if it is genuine. We all want to say that we will be faithful in our love for another. That is the intent of our heart but what is the strength of our character? Love is a choice and it is a choice that we must make many times in order to stay faithful. We make the commitment to love another but we live out that commitment every day afterwards. Love is not a matter of words only but a matter of faithfulness in living out the words that we have made to another. That commitment that we make to love another will be tested. It is not a matter of “if” but “when” it will be tested.

We love, because He first loved us. I John 4:19

Love begins with experiencing God’s love. We love the Lord because He first loved us. When we experience His love then we can love others with an unconditional love, which is the way that we all want to be loved.

This is His commandment, that we believe in the name of His Son Jesus Christ, and love one another, just as He commanded us. I John 3:23

Our love for the Lord will be expressed in our love for our spouse, our family members and others.

You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your might. Deuteronomy 6:5

When we learn to love God with all of our heart, soul and might then we can love another. Loving God means loving others. We learn of love from God and we learn what it means to be faithful from Him also. Adam and Eve were tested in the garden of Eden. They failed the test and chose to not love God by loving themselves. The Lord continued to love them in spite of their lack of love for God and the rest of the Bible is the story of God’s love for Adam and Eve and all of their descendants and His faithfulness to show them that love.

The Lord God commanded the man, saying, “From any tree of the garden you may eat freely; but from the tree of the knowledge of good and evil you shall not eat, for in the day that you eat from it you will surely die.” Genesis 2:16,17

Adam and Eve were more concerned about “what was in it for them” than in being faithful to their Creator and God.

When the woman saw that the tree was good for food, and that it was a delight to the eyes, and that the tree was desirable to make one wise, she took from its fruit and ate; and she gave also to her husband with her, and he ate. Genesis 3:6,7

Eve was tested when she was tempted to eat of the tree which the Lord had said not to eat. She was tempted because of how she looked at the fruit of the tree. What Eve saw was “good” and “delightful” and “desirable”. However, it was not good but bad, it would not bring her delight but pain and it only seemed desirable but in the end she would regret it. That is how the test will be. It will seem appealing and tempting but will only destroy. If we fail the test then it will bring not only death to the love relationship but it will bring death to the soul.

For you have need of endurance, so that when you have done the will of God, you may receive what was promised. Hebrews 10:36

Every love relationship has a lot of promise. If we enter into a marriage covenant then it has the promise of a loving and trusting union between a man and a woman that will bring great joy, satisfaction and love that will grow as the two grow old together. The marriage relationship is the sweetest, warmest, most trusting and loving relationship on earth when it is done God’s way.

Whoever is wise, let him understand these things;
Whoever is discerning, let him know them.
For the ways of the Lord are right,
And the righteous will walk in them,
But transgressors will stumble in them. Hosea 14:9

God’s ways are right. Those who are wise will learn the ways of God and walk in them. Their marriage will be blessed. Those who are faithful in their relationship with God and in their marriage when they are tested will grow even stronger in their love. Testing brings trials and trials produce endurance. Endurance is what strengthens and perfects us. It is the relationships that endure the tests and trials of life that bring the lasting joy and satisfaction in life as they are made perfect and complete.

Consider it all joy, my brethren, when you encounter various trials, knowing that the testing of your faith produces endurance. And let endurance have its perfect result, so that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing. James 1:2-4

When you are tested through trials then persevere in doing what is right. Stay faithful. Walk by faith and not by feelings. Love can grow and be restored in relationships. Relationships are not easy but they are worth it. Do what is right. Don’t give up.

Blessed is a man who perseveres under trial; for once he has been approved, he will receive the crown of life which the Lord has promised to those who love Him. James 1:12

All love relationships will be tested. Your relationship and love for the Lord will be tested. Your marriage will be tested. Love is faithfulness and perseverance and those who are faithful and persevere to the end will be glad. Those who are faithful to the Lord will be faithful in their marriage.

For yet in a very little while,
He who is coming will come, and will not delay.
But My righteous one shall live by faith;
And if he shrinks back, My soul has no pleasure in him. But we are not of those who shrink back to destruction, but of those who have faith to the preserving of the soul. Hebrews 10:37-39

A Life that Does What is Required

The Lord made it clear in the Old Testament and the New Testament what He requires of us.

Micah 6:8 He has told you, O man, what is good;
And what does the Lord require of you
But to do justice, to love kindness,
And to walk humbly with your God?

Only God is good and so to do what He requires of us we must have Him in our life. He will live this kind of life through us.

Mark 10:18 And Jesus said to him, “Why do you call Me good? No one is good except God alone.

Righteousness and justice is the foundation of His throne.

Psalm 97:2 Clouds and thick darkness surround Him;
Righteousness and justice are the foundation of His throne.

He loves righteousness and justice.

Psalm 33:5 He loves righteousness and justice; The earth is full of the lovingkindness of the Lord.

His throne is established in lovingkindness and He seeks justice.

Isaiah 16:5 A throne will even be established in lovingkindness, And a judge will sit on it in faithfulness in the tent of David; Moreover, he will seek justice And be prompt in righteousness.

He will give the person who walks humbly with Him the wisdom in how to do justice and love kindness. This word for humbly is only mentioned twice in the Old Testament and here in Proverbs is the second time.

Proverbs 11:2 When pride comes, then comes dishonor, But with the humble is wisdom.

The Lord spoke to the religeous leaders that they were not putting emphasis on the weightier things of the law.

Matthew 23:23 Woe to you, scribes and Pharisees, hypocrites! For you tithe mint and dill and cummin, and have neglected the weightier provisions of the law: justice and mercy and faithfulness; but these are the things you should have done without neglecting the others.

This word faithfulness means submissive obedience to walking a life of faith in God or in other words, to walk humbly with your God.

A Life with Love Must Grow

Love is a choice and love abides in relationships. When loving choices are made in a relationship where love is then the love will grow in that relationship. Love is a flame that can be kindled by good choices and warm the hearts of the two people in the love relationship or the love can be quenched by bad choices and allow the hearts of the two people to grow cold toward each other.

To sum up, all of you be harmonious, sympathetic, brotherly, kindhearted, and humble in spirit; I Peter 3:8

The summing up of how a relationship should be is that it is to be harmonious. The two people are to be sympathetic towards each other and brotherly, kindhearted and humble in spirit.

Do not be bound together with unbelievers; for what partnership have righteousness and lawlessness, or what fellowship has light with darkness? II Corinthians 6:14

The first requirement for a harmonious marriage is that the union must be of two believers in Christ. If you are a believer and you are considering marriage to an unbeliever then you are going against the Lord and His counsel. His blessing will not be on your marriage.

To sum up, all of you be harmonious, sympathetic, brotherly, kindhearted, and humble in spirit; I Peter 3:8

The word sympathy means “a feeling of sorrow for someone else’s misfortune” or “a common feeling or understanding between people”. The place that someone should always be able to receive sympathy is in the marriage. A loving marriage doubles the joys and cuts the sorrows in half. Two people who love each other will share one another’s sorrows.

Be kind to one another, tender-hearted, forgiving each other, just as God in Christ also has forgiven you. Ephesians 4:32

We are not only to be sympathetic towards one another but we are to be tender hearted with each other. It is one thing to be sympathetic towards another when they suffer with struggles outside of the marriage but when someone does what is wrong within the marriage then that becomes much more difficult.

not returning evil for evil or insult for insult, but giving a blessing instead; for you were called for the very purpose that you might inherit a blessing. I Peter 3:9

One of the secrets to a great marriage is forgiveness. It is crucial to be kindhearted to one another by forgiving each other. No one is perfect and we all sin. When and if you marry then you will marry a sinner. They will mess up and you will mess up. The temptation is to return evil for evil or insult for insult, or in other words, “You did this so I will do that or I will withhold from you!” No, absolutely not, if you want a loving relationship all the days of your lives together, until death do you part, then you must learn to forgive. You must learn to give a blessing instead.

For He rescued us from the domain of darkness, and transferred us to the kingdom of His beloved Son, in whom we have redemption, the forgiveness of sins. Colossians 1:13,14

If you have received forgiveness from Jesus Christ for all of your sins then you can give forgiveness to another. Forgiveness is the greatest gift that you can give to another. There is no sin too great that Jesus Christ has not forgiven you. In the same way, there is no sin too great that you can not forgive in another. Forgiveness is forgiving them of their sins against you and forgiveness is the promise to never bring it up again. If you need to bring it up over and over again then it is not forgiveness. The Lord never brings up your sins to you of all that He has forgiven you.

As far as the east is from the west, So far has He removed our transgressions from us. Psalm 103:12

If you give to your spouse the gift of forgiveness then not only will you be giving them a blessing but you will receive a blessing from the Lord. For love to grow then there must be forgiveness. When someone shows love and forgiveness to another then they are like Christ.

For you have been called for this purpose, since Christ also suffered for you, leaving you an example for you to follow in His steps, who committed no sin, nor was any deceit found in His mouth; and while being reviled, He did not revile in return; while suffering, He uttered no threats, but kept entrusting Himself to Him who judges righteously; I Peter 2:21-23

While being reviled, Jesus did not revile in return. He never returned evil for evil or insult for insult nor did he make any threats. Jesus Christ continually kept entrusting Himself to God, the Father. Jesus Christ was our example of what we are to do when we are suffering, and we do suffer when are affected by the sins of someone else. We are to go to the Lord and entrust ourselves to Him.

Now for this very reason also, applying all diligence, in your faith supply moral excellence, and in your moral excellence, knowledge, and in your knowledge, self-control, and in your self-control, perseverance, and in your perseverance, godliness, and in your godliness, brotherly kindness, and in your brotherly kindness, love. II Peter 1:5-7

You will find that as you apply diligence in your pursuit of love in your marriage and you exercise self control (in your words and actions) and you persevere in it then you will become godly (which is like Christ), and then in your Christlikeness you will show kindness and love. This is truly the picture of marriage that God designed for it to be. Your love for each other will grow and abound. Your hearts will become knit together in love and you will become soulmates of one mind and one heart, as well as becoming one physically. This is the sweetest and most fulfilling of all relationships and is God’s gift to man and woman. It will be honey to your soul and life to your body when it is done God’s way.

A Life in Secret

There are three things that the Lord says that we need to do in secret. Again, He loves to reward His children when they do what pleases Him so He offers great rewards for these three matters of obedience. The Lord says that He sees in secret and He knows what we do in secret. He says that He will reward us openly. If you read the lives of the great men and women that God has used you will learn that they had their secret life with the Lord. Those who are not faithful in their secret life with the Lord eventually fall just as a tree whose roots are shallow or whose inside is rotten will fall. Your roots must go deep into his Word and into the soil of His love. If they do then your spiritual life will be nourished and you will prosper.

Jeremiah 17:7,8 Blessed is the man who trusts in the Lord
And whose trust is the Lord.
For he will be like a tree planted by the water,
That extends its roots by a stream
And will not fear when the heat comes;
But its leaves will be green,
And it will not be anxious in a year of drought
Nor cease to yield fruit.

First, when you give, you are to give in secret. You are to give to those who can not pay you back. You are to give to the poor.

Matthew 6:3 But when you give to the poor, do not let your left hand know what your right hand is doing, so that your giving will be in secret; and your Father who sees what is done in secret will reward you.

Second, when you pray, you are to pray in secret.

Matthew 6:6 But you, when you pray, go into your inner room, close your door and pray to your Father who is in secret, and your Father who sees what is done in secret will reward you.

Third, when you fast, you are to fast in secret.

Matthew 6:17,18 But you, when you fast, anoint your head and wash your face so that your fasting will not be noticed by men, but by your Father who is in secret; and your Father who sees what is done in secret will reward you.

Just as roots are not seen but produce the fruit on the tree for all to see, so you too, when your roots go deep with the Lord, the Lord will be glorified by the fruit of your life as you bear His fruit.

John 15:8 My Father is glorified by this, that you bear much fruit, and so prove to be My disciples.

May your trust in the Lord grow through maintaining your secret life with the Lord through prayer and meditation, fasting and giving.

Psalm 1:2,3 But his delight is in the law of the Lord,
And in His law he meditates day and night.
He will be like a tree firmly planted by streams of water,
Which yields its fruit in its season
And its leaf does not wither;
And in whatever he does, he prospers.

A Life with Love is a Mature Choice

Love is a choice and is not just a feeling. Feelings are based on emotions and emotions are fickle and can easily change with circumstances but love is a choice based on the character of the lover. A person is not ready for the responsibility of a love relationship between a man and a woman until their character is mature enough to make choices based on wisdom and not feelings.

Let our sons in their youth be as grown-up plants, Psalm 144:12a

A young man is not mature until they are as a grown up plant. Maturity should come to a young man in his youth. This is a picture of prosperity. When young men are not mature in their youth then there will be problems in the family and problems in the nation. A grown up plant is one that is strong.

The glory of young men is their strength, Proverbs 20:29

A young man must be strong. He must be strong not only physically but he must be strong spiritually, emotionally and mentally.

Let no one look down on your youthfulness, but rather in speech, conduct, love, faith and purity, show yourself an example of those who believe. I Timothy 4:12

A young man must show himself to be an example of maturity. His speech must be gracious. His conduct must be above reproach. A young man must know how to love with the love of Christ. He must be strong in his faith and have a pure heart.

He who loves purity of heart And whose speech is gracious, the king is his friend. Proverbs 22:11

The evidence of a young man’s maturity will be seen in the people who are attracted to him as his friends. When a young lady is considering a relationship with a young man she should look to see who his friends are. A deceitful or charming young man will tell her what she wants to hear but a wise young lady will look at the fruit of his life rather than the fruit of his lips to determine if he is genuine and worthy of her.

And our daughters as corner pillars fashioned as for a palace; Psalm 144:12b

A young woman is not mature enough to be in a love relationship with a young man until she is as a corner pillar. A corner pillar must be able to stand alone. If a corner pillar is wobbly or weak then the entire building will fall. A corner pillar must be strong and not dependent on others for its strength.

so that they may encourage the young women to love their husbands, to love their children, Titus 2:4

A young woman’s main responsibility when the Lord gives her a family is to love her husband and to love her children. A young woman must have learned what it means to fear the Lord in order to fulfill her God given privilege and responsibility.

Her children rise up and bless her;
Her husband also, and he praises her, saying:
“Many daughters have done nobly,
But you excel them all.”
Charm is deceitful and beauty is vain,
But a woman who fears the Lord, she shall be praised. Proverbs 31:28-30

If a young woman learns to fear the Lord and love Him then she will be ready for a love relationship. The fruit of her life will be such that her children will rise up and bless her and her husband will praise her.

Your adornment must not be merely external—braiding the hair, and wearing gold jewelry, or putting on dresses; but let it be the hidden person of the heart, with the imperishable quality of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is precious in the sight of God. I Peter 3:3,4

She will focus more on her relationship with the Lord and the inner beauty that comes from that relationship rather than on the outward beauty that will fade away with time. She will still seek to be beautiful but the beauty that comes from within will outshine the beauty that is on the outside.

To sum up, all of you be harmonious, sympathetic, brotherly, kindhearted, and humble in spirit; not returning evil for evil or insult for insult, but giving a blessing instead; for you were called for the very purpose that you might inherit a blessing. I Peter 3:8,9

The union of two mature people in marriage will be a blessing. They will be a blessing to each other, a blessing to their children and a blessing to the world. A great nation is made up of great families and great families are made up of great marriages and great marriages are made up of great Christians who are mature in their relationship with the Lord and mature as individuals.

A Life of Prayer

Prayer can be outlawed but it can never be stopped because the Lord made us to pray. It is a human instinct to pray. Sometimes people may get confused as to the One and only True God and so they will pray to a god that they have made, either in their minds or with their hands. However, there is only One God who hears and answers. There is only one group of people that He attends to their prayers.

I Peter 3:12 “For the eyes of the Lord are toward the righteous, And His ears attend to their prayer, But the face of the Lord is against those who do evil.”

Don’t get discouraged in your prayers. He hears them and answers them but He is not limited by time. It may just be a matter of time before you see the answer.

Luke 18:1 Now He was telling them a parable to show that at all times they ought to pray and not to lose heart,

We are to ask the Father in Jesus name and He will hear us.

John 16:23 In that day you will not question Me about anything. Truly, truly, I say to you, if you ask the Father for anything in My name, He will give it to you.

The Lord wants us to devote ourselves to prayer.

Acts 1:14 These all with one mind were continually devoting themselves to prayer, along with the women, and Mary the mother of Jesus, and with His brothers.

Our prayers for the nonChristian should always be for their salvation.

Romans 10:1 Brethren, my heart’s desire and my prayer to God for them is for their salvation.

We should pray for our spiritual leaders in our churches and missionaries.

Romans 15:30 Now I urge you, brethren, by our Lord Jesus Christ and by the love of the Spirit, to strive together with me in your prayers to God for me,

Pray for other Christians.

Ephesians 6:18 With all prayer and petition pray at all times in the Spirit, and with this in view, be on the alert with all perseverance and petition for all the saints,

Pray for yourself. He cares for you.

Philippians 4:6 Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God.

Always remember to give thanks in your prayers. He has done so much for us.

Colossians 4:2 Devote yourselves to prayer, keeping alert in it with an attitude of thanksgiving;

Pray for everyone and especially for your leaders.

I Timothy 2:1 First of all, then, I urge that entreaties and prayers, petitions and thanksgivings, be made on behalf of all men,

Pray that the Lord will save you from death, not just spiritual death, but death to your soul.

Hebrews 5:7 In the days of His flesh, He offered up both prayers and supplications with loud crying and tears to the One able to save Him from death, and He was heard because of His piety.

If you are struggling in your Christian life then go to one who can pray for you. The Lord has called us to pray for each other.

James 5:16 Therefore, confess your sins to one another, and pray for one another so that you may be healed. The effective prayer of a righteous man can accomplish much.

Finally, the end is near and you want to be found faithful in prayer. Prayer is talking to the Lord. Just talk to Him from your heart. He would rather you pour out your heart to Him then not pray at all or struggle with saying the right words. He knows your heart and He loves you. He wants to hear from you and He will hear you.

I Peter 4:7 The end of all things is near; therefore, be of sound judgment and sober spirit for the purpose of prayer.

A Life with Love Must Die to Self

We make the commitment to God to love our spouse when we get married on our wedding day but that commitment to love another is strengthened or weakened by the daily choices we make. The marriage vow is a vow to God and He is the One whom we love when we keep our vows. Our spouse is the recipient of our love for God in keeping our vow or our lack of love for God by not keeping our vow. Your love for your spouse is an expression of your love for God.

No one can serve two masters; for either he will hate the one and love the other, or he will be devoted to one and despise the other. Matthew 6:24

No man can serve two masters, either he will love one or hate the other. If you love God then you will follow Him and obey Him. He says that if you love Him then you must deny yourself. You can not serve God and self.

And He was saying to them all, “If anyone wishes to come after Me, he must deny himself, and take up his cross daily and follow Me. Luke 9:23

If you want to follow the Lord then you must deny yourself. This is lived out more in marriage than anywhere else. The question most often is not “do I love my spouse more than any other?”. Most people would probably be able to say “yes”. However, the question after we are married is more like, “do I love my spouse more than myself?”.

Truly, truly, I say to you, unless a grain of wheat falls into the earth and dies, it remains alone; but if it dies, it bears much fruit. John 12:24

Our lives are like a grain of wheat. It must die before it will bear fruit. If it refuses to die then it will remain alone. That is how love in a relationship is. If you refuse to die to yourself then you will remain alone but if you will die to yourself, your dreams, your expectations, your desires, etc. then you will bear much fruit and your marriage will bear much fruit. You will not be alone but your life will be filled with love. It sounds like a paradox but it is true. You must die to bear fruit.

He who loves his life loses it, John 12:25a

If you love your live then you will lose it. However, if you allow yourself to die with Christ on the cross, die to yourself, then you will live.

And He summoned the crowd with His disciples, and said to them, “If anyone wishes to come after Me, he must deny himself, and take up his cross and follow Me. Mark 8:34

When you come after Jesus Christ then you must deny yourself and take up your cross, die to yourself and follow Him. However, in doing so, you will find life. You will be set free from the things that bind you and frustrate you, which often are your own pursuits after your own desires. The Lord Jesus Christ will give you His life and desires in place of your life and desires.

I have been crucified with Christ; and it is no longer I who live, but Christ lives in me; and the life which I now live in the flesh I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave Himself up for me. Galatians 2:20

When Christ lives in you then He will love through you. He will love your spouse with His love. It will be an unselfish love that will build up and establish your marriage. It will be a love that will encourage and cause trust to grow in your life and in the life of your spouse. It will be a love that will thrive and grow.

But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control; against such things there is no law. Now those who belong to Christ Jesus have crucified the flesh with its passions and desires. Galatians 5:22-24

Many a person has lost their marriage because they refused to die to their self with its passions and desires. You can only die to yourself if you have another who will give His life to you. In death you receive life and in dying you learn to live.

But the desire of the righteous will be granted. Proverbs 10:24

The Lord wants to give you your desires that are His desires for you. However, when He gives them to you, the desires will be free of the sorrows that you would have received had you pursued them according to your ways.

It is the blessing of the Lord that makes rich, And He adds no sorrow to it. Proverbs 10:22

Follow the Lord with all of your heart and He will teach you His ways. He wants to give you a great marriage that is filled with love, joy, peace, patience and all of the other wonderful fruit of His Spirit. However, you must come to Him empty and let Him fill you. When you die to yourself then you become empty of yourself so that He can fill you with Himself, and He will live and love through you in the power of His Spirit. You will be able to say with all of the saints through the ages.

For to me, to live is Christ and to die is gain. Philippians 1:21

A Life that Stays In Love

Everyone wants to stay “in love” with the love of their life when they get married. You may not be married yet and are wondering why this would apply to you. It very much applies to any young lady who wants to and plans to get married. In fact, that is God’s will for most young ladies, but not all. However, what can you do now to help your marriage, if the Lord should choose to give you that gift?

Every older lady who is happily married knows the “secret” to staying in love. It should not be a secret but for whatever reason, not many know it or do it.

Your relationship with your husband will be an expression of your relationship with the Lord. You say you love the Lord? We know that if you are a Christian then you want to love God. A measure of how much you love the Lord is how much you love others.

I John 4:20 Whoever claims to love God yet hates a brother or sister is a liar. For whoever does not love their brother and sister, whom they have seen, cannot love God, whom they have not seen.

Just as God loves because He is love, in the same way, the recipient of your love should not be the source of your love but God should be the source. He can and will love through you.

I John 4:7,8 Dear friends, let us love one another, for love comes from God. Everyone who loves has been born of God and knows God. Whoever does not love does not know God, because God is love.

The Lord loved you when you were unlovable and it changed your life.

Romans 5:8 But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us.

The Lord wants you to keep yourself in His love. In other words, to stay in love with Him.

Jude 1:21 keep yourselves in God’s love as you wait for the mercy of our Lord Jesus Christ to bring you to eternal life.

The way you keep yourself in the love of Christ is to nurture the relationship and to not neglect it. Over and over again in the Bible the Lord reproves His people for neglecting their relationship with the Lord and slipping into a ritualistic pattern with Him. Most marriages fail because of neglect although nearly all begin with good intentions. Both people just get so busy and before they realize it their love for each other is lukewarm and then cold. Are you ever too busy to spend time with the Lord? Is your love just as fresh as when you first came into that relationship?

Matthew 23:23 “Woe to you, teachers of the law and Pharisees, you hypocrites! You give a tenth of your spices—mint, dill and cumin. But you have neglected the more important matters of the law—justice, mercy and faithfulness. You should have practiced the latter, without neglecting the former.

If you learn to be faithful in your relationship with the Lord then you will have gone a long way in cultivating an intimate marriage. If you learn to love, not based on what you will receive in return, but because the Lord has called you and enabled you to love then you will have learned the secret of staying “in love” with the one whom the Lord has called you to be one with here on earth.

If you are married: Just as the Lord wants you to delight yourself in Him and to want to be with Him, so too, if you are married, your husband wants you to want him. He married you because he thought that you did want him. Do you still delight in your husband just as when you were first married? Do you still get excited about seeing him? Just as God’s love changed your life, so too, your love and desire for your husband can motivate him to be the person that the Lord has designed him to be.

Titus 2:4 Then they can urge the younger women to love their husbands and children,

This word “love” in this verse in Titus means to “be a lover of their husband”, or “to want or delight in their husband”.