#Marriageadvice – Page 3 – Instructions To A Young Life

A Life with Love Honors Another

Then Noah began farming and planted a vineyard. He drank of the wine and became drunk, and uncovered himself inside his tent. Ham, the father of Canaan, saw the nakedness of his father, and told his two brothers outside. But Shem and Japheth took a garment and laid it upon both their shoulders and walked backward and covered the nakedness of their father; and their faces were turned away, so that they did not see their father’s nakedness. When Noah awoke from his wine, he knew what his youngest son had done to him. Genesis 9:20-24

Noah drank wine and became drunk. Drinking wine is mentioned in the Bible as not being wise.

Wine is a mocker, strong drink a brawler, And whoever is intoxicated by it is not wise. Proverbs 20:1

If you want to be mocked then drink wine and if you want fighting in your life and marriage then drink alcohol. Alcohol has destroyed more families and more lives than we will ever know. It is wisdom to stay away from it. The Bible also says that drinking wine is not loving.

It is good not to eat meat or to drink wine, or to do anything by which your brother stumbles. Romans 14:21

The word “good” means the highest form of love. Therefore, the highest form of love towards anyone is to not cause them to stumble. Wine is a stumbling block to many and you have no idea who it is a stumbling block until they have stumbled over it. The Lord has one of the biggest warnings towards those who are stumbling blocks.

but whoever causes one of these little ones who believe in Me to stumble, it would be better for him to have a heavy millstone hung around his neck, and to be drowned in the depth of the sea. “Woe to the world because of its stumbling blocks! For it is inevitable that stumbling blocks come; but woe to that man through whom the stumbling block comes! Matthew 18:6,7

Noah lived a life of wisdom and honor and only did a little foolishness. However, it is his foolishness that is much remembered.

Dead flies make a perfumer’s oil stink, so a little foolishness is weightier than wisdom and honor. Ecclesiastes 10:1

His foolishness brought much pain and sorrow to one of his sons and one of his grandsons. Ham saw his father naked and went and told his brothers.

Above all, keep fervent in your love for one another, because love covers a multitude of sins. I Peter 4:8

Rather than covering his father’s shame, Ham made it known. Love covers a multitude of sins and love covers shame. Ham did not honor his father.

Honor your father and your mother, as the Lord your God has commanded you, that your days may be prolonged and that it may go well with you on the land which the Lord your God gives you. Deuteronomy 5:16

It did not go well with Ham because he did not honor his father. As a result, it did not go well with one of Ham’s sons. As a parent it is more painful to see your children suffer than it would be to bear the suffering yourself and especially if you are the cause of the grief. Love acts wisely and love honors. How important it is for parents to not allow their children to ever see them naked. When a parent allows this to happen then that parent is setting their child up for failure and making it more difficult for the child to fulfill God’s commandment to honor their mother and father.

All who honored her despise her
Because they have seen her nakedness; Lamentations 1:8b

Also, it is neither good or wise for a young lady to allow any man to see her nakedness before marriage. It will cause the man to not have as much respect for her after marriage and many a man will not marry a woman once he has seen her nakedness. A woman needs to keep her mystique and a man needs for a woman to keep her purity. If a man wants a female to unclothe herself then he does not love her. A man who will abuse his wife is also a man who can not wait until marriage for the physical. If a woman will have high standards for herself and not compromise physically then the man will rise to those standards and honor her and treat her with love and respect.

Woe to you who make your neighbors drink, Who mix in your venom even to make them drunk So as to look on their nakedness!“You will be filled with disgrace rather than honor. Now you yourself drink and expose your own nakedness. The cup in the Lord’s right hand will come around to you, And utter disgrace will come upon your glory. Habakkuk 2:15,16

The glory of a young man is his strength, whether it is his physical strength or the strength of his character. It is to his shame and disgrace to give his date or “friend” anything to intoxicate her in hopes of seeing her nakedness. A young lady’s glory is her purity and her beauty. It is a disgrace and shame for her to give to someone else what is reserved only for her husband and in marriage.

And Joseph her husband, being a righteous man and not wanting to disgrace her, Matthew 1:19

When Mary, the mother of Jesus, became pregnant with Jesus and was “with child” before marriage, Joseph, who was engaged to her and being “a righteous man”, did not want to disgrace her. Joseph did not understand that it was the Lord, through His Holy Spirit, who had appointed this to happen. It was not until the angel came to him in a dream and let him know that the Messiah was coming into the world through Mary, did Joseph understand that Mary was still a virgin and had remained faithful and pure. Joseph had to have felt hurt and betrayed, however, righteousness is doing what is right in God’s eyes, and Joseph knew that the “right thing to do” was to not make known any shame and disgrace. Joseph not only loved Mary but he loved the Lord and wanted to do what was right. If someone wants a good marriage then they must have a godly marriage and a godly marriage is doing what is right in God’s eyes. Doing what is right is God’s eye is doing life, love, and relationships according to God’s design.

A Life with Love Means Becoming One

When two people agree then they can walk together through life without constant contentions and conflicts. When two agree then they have sweet fellowship together. It does not mean that they both don’t have different opinions on nonessentials or different tastes, but they do agree on the major tenants of life.

Can two walk together, unless they are agreed? Amos 3:3

God’s design for a love relationship is diversity but unity.

implore you to walk in a manner worthy of the calling with which you have been called, with all humility and gentleness, with patience, showing tolerance for one another in love, being diligent to preserve the unity of the Spirit in the bond of peace. Ephesians 4:1b-3

Marriage is meant to be a long lasting love relationship of a man and a woman that is characterized also by peace and joy. It is crucial that a couple who plans to spend their lives together in a loving marriage be united in Spirit.

Now may the God of peace Himself sanctify you entirely; and may your spirit and soul and body be preserved complete, I Thessalonians 5:23a

There are three aspects of humans and they are the spirit, soul and body. Union of the spirit brings lasting satisfaction, union of the soul brings continual satisfaction and union in the body brings momentary satisfaction in marriage. To have unity in the marriage it must be a union of the spirit, soul and body.

Beyond all these things put on love, which is the perfect bond of unity. Colossians 3:14

There must be love in the spirit. If someone has different spiritual values than you, then you will not have unity in the spirit. They will not love what you love nor will they value what you value. There will be a continual conflict of the spirit.

Do not be bound together with unbelievers; for what partnership have righteousness and lawlessness, or what fellowship has light with darkness? II Corinthians 6:14

The most important aspect of a relationship is to have the same spiritual values. Our spiritual values is at the core of our being. Your spiritual values define who you are. What you do in life comes out of who you are. Look at the product of a person’s life to see what their spiritual values are. Look at where they spend their time and their money to know what they value. Also, do not allow the other aspects of a relationship to get in the way or go before the spiritual. The physical attraction can blind a person to the spiritual values. Do not allow yourself to become physically involved with someone until marriage. Who you marry is one of the most important decisions in life. You need to see clearly and hear clearly.

being of the same mind, maintaining the same love, united in spirit, intent on one purpose. Philippians 2:2b

Not only is it important to be united in spirit but it is also important to be of the same mind in order to maintain the same unity of love. Being of one mind is the oneness of soul and will allow you and your spouse to become true soulmates. Oneness of soul will bring oneness of purpose in life. When you both have the same purpose in life then you will work together rather than work against each other. Your burdens will be lighter because you have someone who shares them with you. Your troubles will seem smaller and your joys will be much greater when you both are of the same mind and intent on the same purpose.

Do nothing from selfishness or empty conceit, but with humility of mind regard one another as more important than yourselves; do not merely look out for your own personal interests, but also for the interests of others. Philippians 2:3,4

Life becomes much sweeter when you and your marriage partner do nothing from selfishness or conceit but each of you consider the other more important than yourself. In a loving marriage someone always has your back. You don’t have to live in a continual me first, survival mode. Each one of you will complement the other in strengths and gifts. A great marriage is like a lifelong dance with each partner learning to live in harmony with the other rather than stepping on each other and hurting one another. A great marriage is when each partner feels like they are the blessed one and that their spouse is the better half. When both people feel this way in a marriage then there is not only a great marriage but there will be great love. Just as two people must learn to dance together in harmony so two people in a marriage must learn to live together in love and unity. It begins, continues and ends with each one honoring the other as more important than themselves.

Marriage is to be held in honor among all, and the marriage bed is to be undefiled; for fornicators and adulterers God will judge. Hebrews 13:4

The last aspect of a loving marriage with unity is where there is the union of the two bodies. When a person is sexually intimate with another they become one with that person. It is most important that you are only one in body with your spouse. There will be difficulty in becoming one in body if there is not oneness in spirit and soul. There will be difficulty in marriage if one or both have been immoral before marriage and there will also be struggles if one of the partners has looked at pornography. Anything that is evil in God’s sight will be a thief and rob you of the good gift that He wants to give to you. The Lord says no to what will bring harm to you now and later on in life.

Do not be bound together with unbelievers; for what partnership have righteousness and lawlessness, or what fellowship has light with darkness? Or what harmony has Christ with Belial, or what has a believer in common with an unbeliever? Or what agreement has the temple of God with idols? For we are the temple of the living God; just as God said, “I will dwell in them and walk among them;
And I will be their God, and they shall be My people. II Corinthians 6:14-16

If you want to have a great marriage and walk through life with the sweet companionship and loyalty of another who will love you for better or for worse, for richer or for poorer and in sickness and in health then you must become one in spirit, soul and body. It begins with becoming a Christian and then learning what it means to walk with the Lord in the light of His Word. He will teach you how to love and what it means to become one with another.

I in them and You in Me, that they may be perfected in unity, so that the world may know that You sent Me, and loved them, even as You have loved Me. John 17:23

When a person becomes a Christian then Jesus Christ comes and lives within them and lives through them. He teaches us to first walk with Him so that we can walk in unity with others. He perfects us in unity as we get to know Him and His great love for us. He came to love us and to teach us how to love others with His perfect love. We can not love with the kind of love that our spouse needs apart from Him. We can’t love, He never said we could, but He can love through us and He always said He would. Marriage makes us aware of our selfishness and our conceit but Jesus makes us aware of His love and His power to live and love through us.

Therefore, since we have a great high priest who has passed through the heavens, Jesus the Son of God, let us hold fast our confession. For we do not have a high priest who cannot sympathize with our weaknesses, but One who has been tempted in all things as we are, yet without sin. Therefore let us draw near with confidence to the throne of grace, so that we may receive mercy and find grace to help in time of need. Hebrews 4:14-16

A Life with Love Makes a Promise

Love makes promises and lives by the promise. It is not loving for a man to live with a woman outside of marriage. A woman needs, desires and longs for security. If a man loves a woman then he will give her that security. He does so through a promise. A marriage proposal is a promise to love her and to provide for her and protect her. When he marries her then he begins to fulfill the promise that he has made to her.

I establish My covenant with you; and all flesh shall never again be cut off by the water of the flood, neither shall there again be a flood to destroy the earth.” God said, “This is the sign of the covenant which I am making between Me and you and every living creature that is with you, for all successive generations; I set My bow in the cloud, and it shall be for a sign of a covenant between Me and the earth. It shall come about, when I bring a cloud over the earth, that the bow will be seen in the cloud, and I will remember My covenant, which is between Me and you and every living creature of all flesh; and never again shall the water become a flood to destroy all flesh. When the bow is in the cloud, then I will look upon it, to remember the everlasting covenant between God and every living creature of all flesh that is on the earth.” And God said to Noah, “This is the sign of the covenant which I have established between Me and all flesh that is on the earth.” Genesis 9:11-17

The Lord loved Noah and all of mankind and made a promise to Noah and his descendants that He would never destroy mankind through a flood again. This promise was God’s love to give mankind security so that man would not be fearful when the rain would come again. The rainbow was the sign of God’s promise never to flood the earth again. The wedding ring that a man gives to a woman when he marries her is a sign of his love for her that he will be faithful to her and love her. She need not be fearful when the storms of life come because of her husband’s promise to her to love her for better or for worse, for richer or for poorer, and in sickness and in health. He will love her all the days of their lives as long as the two of them shall live.

I can do all things through Him who strengthens me. Phillipians 4:13

We can only do what God has called us to do and be who God has called us to be by His strength and grace. Marriage humbles the husband and the wife because they both must look to Him and rely on His strength for the marriage to grow strong and loving.

Two are better than one because they have a good return for their labor. For if either of them falls, the one will lift up his companion. But woe to the one who falls when there is not another to lift him up. Furthermore, if two lie down together they keep warm, but how can one be warm alone? And if one can overpower him who is alone, two can resist him. A cord of three strands is not quickly torn apart. Ecclesiastes 4:9-12

Marriage is one of God’s provisions for productivity and also from discouragement. Two are better than one and will have a good return for their labor. When one falls the other can lift the other one up. It is a comfort to sleep together with your spouse and especially on cold nights. However, when the Lord is the center of your marriage then your marriage will grow stronger and stronger and even more loving. There is grace that gives forgiveness and there will be reconciliation when one fails and a love that is restored and grows.

And He has said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for power is perfected in weakness.” II Corinthians 12:9a

The Lord will give His grace to the husband and the wife to fulfill the vows they made to God and the promises they made to each other on their wedding day. Marriage takes a lot of humility and grace but it is worth it. It is our pride that destroys our relationships and marriages.

and all of you, clothe yourselves with humility toward one another, for God is opposed to the proud, but gives grace to the humble. I Peter 5:5b

A Life with Love Must Be Tested

If love is not tested then we will never know the depth and strength of our love. It is not until our love is tested will we know if it is genuine. We all want to say that we will be faithful in our love for another. That is the intent of our heart but what is the strength of our character? Love is a choice and it is a choice that we must make many times in order to stay faithful. We make the commitment to love another but we live out that commitment every day afterwards. Love is not a matter of words only but a matter of faithfulness in living out the words that we have made to another. That commitment that we make to love another will be tested. It is not a matter of “if” but “when” it will be tested.

We love, because He first loved us. I John 4:19

Love begins with experiencing God’s love. We love the Lord because He first loved us. When we experience His love then we can love others with an unconditional love, which is the way that we all want to be loved.

This is His commandment, that we believe in the name of His Son Jesus Christ, and love one another, just as He commanded us. I John 3:23

Our love for the Lord will be expressed in our love for our spouse, our family members and others.

You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your might. Deuteronomy 6:5

When we learn to love God with all of our heart, soul and might then we can love another. Loving God means loving others. We learn of love from God and we learn what it means to be faithful from Him also. Adam and Eve were tested in the garden of Eden. They failed the test and chose to not love God by loving themselves. The Lord continued to love them in spite of their lack of love for God and the rest of the Bible is the story of God’s love for Adam and Eve and all of their descendants and His faithfulness to show them that love.

The Lord God commanded the man, saying, “From any tree of the garden you may eat freely; but from the tree of the knowledge of good and evil you shall not eat, for in the day that you eat from it you will surely die.” Genesis 2:16,17

Adam and Eve were more concerned about “what was in it for them” than in being faithful to their Creator and God.

When the woman saw that the tree was good for food, and that it was a delight to the eyes, and that the tree was desirable to make one wise, she took from its fruit and ate; and she gave also to her husband with her, and he ate. Genesis 3:6,7

Eve was tested when she was tempted to eat of the tree which the Lord had said not to eat. She was tempted because of how she looked at the fruit of the tree. What Eve saw was “good” and “delightful” and “desirable”. However, it was not good but bad, it would not bring her delight but pain and it only seemed desirable but in the end she would regret it. That is how the test will be. It will seem appealing and tempting but will only destroy. If we fail the test then it will bring not only death to the love relationship but it will bring death to the soul.

For you have need of endurance, so that when you have done the will of God, you may receive what was promised. Hebrews 10:36

Every love relationship has a lot of promise. If we enter into a marriage covenant then it has the promise of a loving and trusting union between a man and a woman that will bring great joy, satisfaction and love that will grow as the two grow old together. The marriage relationship is the sweetest, warmest, most trusting and loving relationship on earth when it is done God’s way.

Whoever is wise, let him understand these things;
Whoever is discerning, let him know them.
For the ways of the Lord are right,
And the righteous will walk in them,
But transgressors will stumble in them. Hosea 14:9

God’s ways are right. Those who are wise will learn the ways of God and walk in them. Their marriage will be blessed. Those who are faithful in their relationship with God and in their marriage when they are tested will grow even stronger in their love. Testing brings trials and trials produce endurance. Endurance is what strengthens and perfects us. It is the relationships that endure the tests and trials of life that bring the lasting joy and satisfaction in life as they are made perfect and complete.

Consider it all joy, my brethren, when you encounter various trials, knowing that the testing of your faith produces endurance. And let endurance have its perfect result, so that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing. James 1:2-4

When you are tested through trials then persevere in doing what is right. Stay faithful. Walk by faith and not by feelings. Love can grow and be restored in relationships. Relationships are not easy but they are worth it. Do what is right. Don’t give up.

Blessed is a man who perseveres under trial; for once he has been approved, he will receive the crown of life which the Lord has promised to those who love Him. James 1:12

All love relationships will be tested. Your relationship and love for the Lord will be tested. Your marriage will be tested. Love is faithfulness and perseverance and those who are faithful and persevere to the end will be glad. Those who are faithful to the Lord will be faithful in their marriage.

For yet in a very little while,
He who is coming will come, and will not delay.
But My righteous one shall live by faith;
And if he shrinks back, My soul has no pleasure in him. But we are not of those who shrink back to destruction, but of those who have faith to the preserving of the soul. Hebrews 10:37-39

A Life that Understands that Your Husband is a King

Understanding God’s Design for a Man to Be a King

The Lord made every man to be a king. A king is a ruler and God made men to conquer and rule. A man needs a queen to share in his kingdom. The most important decision that a man makes, other than where he will spend eternity, is who will be his queen. An excellent wife is the crown of her husband. If he chooses an excellent wife then he will have far more advantages in life to conquer and rule. An excellent wife will be a wife that he can trust. She will only do him good and will not cause him grief. She will have his best interests in her mind and do what is right. She will give him honor. An excellent wife will not seek to get her own way but she will seek to do her husband’s will. She will not manipulate him or keep secrets from him, such as, how she spends money, where she goes and who she talks to. She will not talk about his struggles, weaknesses or faults with other women (not even with her mother). She will not correspond with other men. Her husband will be able to trust her completely and he will be able to delegate responsibilities to her. He will listen to her advice for she will have his best interests at heart and not have ulterior self-seeking motives. She will understand that a children’s glory is their father and she will teach their children to honor their father and she will not ever criticize him to their children. She will not ever say, “don’t tell your father”. If there is a question as to what to do, then she will say, “let us ask your father” and if he is not available then she will know her husband well enough to know what he would want them to do. An excellent wife will recognize her husband’s right to rule.

An excellent wife is the crown of her husband, Proverbs 12:4

Understanding How a Man Becomes a King

A man first learns to rule well by ruling his wife. This is not a bad thing but it is a good thing because it is her protection. She was deceived in the garden by the Serpent’s beauty and charm. She is still easily deceived. God made husband and wife to be joint rulers and she is also a ruler but her husband rules over her. God rules over the husband. If she will trust God then she can learn to trust God through her husband. The Lord will protect her from harm if she will trust the Lord. The Lord’s provision for protection for females is first their father and then their husband. They must stay under their God given authority. If they get out from or go against their God given authority then it is only a matter of time before they will be violated. After a man rules his wife then he rules his children. An excellent wife helps him to be king in their home. She teaches her children to obey their father, not only through her words, but through her example. When a man rules well in his household then he believes he can conquer in the world. He can face each day with confidence.

To the woman He said,
“I will greatly multiply
Your pain in childbirth,
In pain you will bring forth children;
Yet your desire will be for your husband,
And he will rule over you.” Genesis 3:16

Men are very different from women, not only physically, but psychologically. When a man is pleased with a woman then he will give up to half of his kingdom. He wants a queen who will share in his glory. He is looking for a trustworthy woman to love and one whom can give himself to and all that he has. If you become that excellent wife then you will have no regrets. Your husband and children will praise you and your works will praise you also. You will be a success and your husband will be a success also.

Her children rise up and bless her;
Her husband also, and he praises her, saying:
“Many daughters have done nobly,
But you excel them all.”
Charm is deceitful and beauty is vain,
But a woman who fears the Lord, she shall be praised.
Give her the product of her hands,
And let her works praise her in the gates. Proverbs 31:28-31

A Life Understanding that Love is a Gift

God’s design for mankind is love. His plan for all people is that they are to know and live in God’s love and they are to love one another. Love is a gift to some one else. Love can not be earned through works. If one has to work to get something then it is not a gift. Love is a choice for the giver of love and love is a gift to the receiver of love. The receiver must choose to respond and receive the gift of love. Love can be accepted and it can be rejected. The one who loves must have the gift to be able to give it away. Love is a power for good towards another and there is only One who is the source of all power and all love and that is God. God is love. God created man for man to be loved and to love. God created and chose Adam and Eve to receive His gift of love. Love is relational. Adam and Eve rejected God’s gift of love and rejected their relationship with God. Love has boundaries and when Adam and Eve would not accept God’s boundaries then they no longer were able to live in God’s love for them as He designed. Life and love has boundaries for the good of all. Parents set boundaries for their children, if they love them. When we reject God’s boundaries then we reject His love and what is good for us and we choose grief. Grief brings sorrow, pain, sadness, depression and anger.

The foolishness of man ruins his way, And his heart rages against the Lord. Proverbs 19:3

Understand Life without Love

Only a fool would reject God’s love and yet the Bible says that because of Adam and Eve’s foolish decision to reject God that we all come into the world with a foolish heart. The Bible says that what a fool does is stupid. Every stupid decision that anyone ever makes is because they did not go to the Lord and seek His counsel. They acted on their own and did what they wanted to do. God never causes grief. We only bring it on ourselves. Drugs and therapy can not take away our grief, depression, anger, etc. It is not until we are changed from the inside will we ever be free of the things that cause destruction within us. Only God can change us on the inside. Only God can set us free.

Therefore if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creature; the old things passed away; behold, new things have come. II Corinthians 5:17

All of us have messed up in life. There is not a single person that has done life right except for Jesus Christ. He did life right because He is God and He came to love us, to forgive us, to clean up our messes, to restore us and to live through us. He not only teaches us the right way to live so that we can live in His love and be happy but He actually comes and lives within us through the power of His Holy Spirit. He makes us a new person and the old things pass away. There is only one way to be restored to God’s love and that is through Jesus Christ. Each one of us must receive Jesus Christ into our life to be our Lord and Savior.

But as many as received Him, to them He gave the right to become children of God, even to those who believe in His name, John 1:12

A Life with Love Unites

The Lord said in His Word that love is the perfect bond of unity. There will be no unity without love.

Beyond all these things put on love, which is the perfect bond of unity. Colossians 3:14

There will be no peace without unity and very little will be accomplished without unity.

being diligent to preserve the unity of the Spirit in the bond of peace. Ephesians 4:3

Unity must be preserved just as love must be preserved. You can not have one without the other. Love and unity can be lost and when a group of any people is divided against itself then it will fall.

If a house is divided against itself, that house will not be able to stand. Mark 3:25

Many people want to live life without God. However, God is love and without God there will be no love or unity or peace. When God is removed from a marriage, home, community, city or nation then there will be fighting, stress, constant struggle, arguing, bitter jealousy and selfish ambition. The people will bite and devour one another and ultimately end up destroying each other. Only a fool lives as if there is no god.

But if you bite and devour one another, take care that you are not consumed by one another. Galatians 5:15

The Lord has called us to love and to be at peace with one another. It is only possible through God. Jesus Christ came to set us free. Freedom begins on the inside when Jesus Christ sets us free from the things within that enslave us, whether it is bad thoughts, a bad feeling or attitude or bad habits and actions. There is not freedom on the outside if there is not freedom on the inside. We are controlled from within and unless we are controlled by what is good then we gravitate towards what is bad.

For you were called to freedom, brethren; only do not turn your freedom into an opportunity for the flesh, but through love serve one another. Galatians 5:13

It is only when God controls us through His Spirit that we can love one another. It is our flesh that is selfish and destroys us. When a person gives their life to the Lord then He gives them His Spirit. Love comes and lives within them and love starts to live through them.

But I say, walk by the Spirit, and you will not carry out the desire of the flesh. For the flesh sets its desire against the Spirit, and the Spirit against the flesh; for these are in opposition to one another, Galatians 5:16,17a

We are our own enemy when we allow the flesh to control us. It is our flesh that enslaves us. It is our flesh that destroys us, our marriages, our families, our cities and our nations. God’s Spirit is greater than our flesh and when God’s Spirit controls us then we do what is right. When people do what is right then we will love one another. We will help one another. We will be strong and there will be peace, quietness and confidence. Our strength must come from God and God must be our strength.

How blessed is the man whose strength is in You, Psalm 84:5a

Blessed means happy. Blessed are the people whose God is the Lord Jesus Christ. Blessed are the marriages where love abounds. Blessed are the children in whose homes God is honored. Blessed is the nation that trusts in the Lord and really mean that in God they trust. Blessed are the communities, cities and lands where God’s name is remembered. He will come and bless those who honor Jesus Christ, the only true Lord God and Savior.

in every place where I cause My name to be remembered, I will come to you and bless you. Exodus 20:24b

A Life with Love Believes the Truth

When it comes to many areas in life there are many people who have no problem with accepting the truth. Most people understand that if you eat lots of carbs and don’t exercise then you will gain weight. Most people understand that you can not spend your money recklessly and still be able to pay your bills. Most students understand if they want to stay in school then they must study. However, when it comes to love, many people think that they can have it all. They want to be able to do what they want to do but they still want their partner to be faithful. They want to marry someone who has not slept around but they want to be able to do what they want to do. They want love and respect and they want their lusts and desires also. However, just like the rest of life, it does not work that way. You reap what you sow.

Do not be deceived, God is not mocked; for whatever a man sows, this he will also reap. Galatians 6:7

Many people do not want to “live under God’s laws” but they want everyone else to. They want their “freedom” but they do not want someone else to murder them, steal from them or lie to them. The Lord did not give those laws for His sake but for our sake so that we might live in peace with one another. He does not want to “control” us but He wants us to live in harmony and love one another. He does not need us but we need Him. For this reason, the Bible calls a person a fool when they live as if there is no god. In the same way, the Lord gave us laws of truth that will set us free when we live by them. Life and marriage is good to those who will believe what God says and live by His truths. He teaches us to love one another. It is wonderful to be in love and stay in love with the same person throughout your mature years. It is wonderful to not worry about sexually transmitted diseases or the many diseases that come from having more than one partner. Most cervical cancers in women are because they had more than one partner. It is wonderful to not worry if your child will be born blind because you had more than one intimate partner. The Lord made these “rules” or “laws” or “truths” for our sake.

But it shall come about, if you do not obey the Lord your God, to observe to do all His commandments and His statutes with which I charge you today, that all these curses will come upon you and overtake you: “The Lord will send upon you curses, confusion, and rebuke, in all you undertake to do, until you are destroyed and until you perish quickly, on account of the evil of your deeds, because you have forsaken Me. The Lord will make the pestilence cling to you until He has consumed you from the land where you are entering to possess it. The Lord will smite you with consumption and with fever and with inflammation and with fiery heat and with the sword and with blight and with mildew, and they will pursue you until you perish…The Lord will smite you with the boils of Egypt and with tumors and with the scab and with the itch, from which you cannot be healed. The Lord will smite you with madness and with blindness and with bewilderment of heart; You shall betroth a wife, but another man will violate her; Deuteronomy 28:15, 20-23, 27-28, 30a

All these are curses that we bring upon ourselves when we try to do life and love our way and try to “have it all”. Life and love are not any different from everything else. To have one thing then you must give up another.

Now it shall be, if you diligently obey the Lord your God, being careful to do all His commandments which I command you today, the Lord your God will set you high above all the nations of the earth. All these blessings will come upon you and overtake you if you obey the Lord your God…The Lord will make you abound in prosperity, in the offspring of your body and in the offspring of your beast and in the produce of your ground, in the land which the Lord swore to your fathers to give you. The Lord will open for you His good storehouse, the heavens, to give rain to your land in its season and to bless all the work of your hand; and you shall lend to many nations, but you shall not borrow. The Lord will make you the head and not the tail, and you only will be above, and you will not be underneath, if you listen to the commandments of the Lord your God, which I charge you today, to observe them carefully, and do not turn aside from any of the words which I command you today, to the right or to the left, to go after other gods to serve them. Deuteronomy 28:1-2,11-14

No one can make you eat healthy or spend less money to keep you healthy and your life in order. No one can make anyone study to stay in school. How easy it is to see the lives of other people. Why is there so much pain from relationships? Why do so many people who begin with love end up hating one another? Pain comes when the truth is ignored. It is the truth that if you will obey the commands and instructions of the Lord, which He gave to us for our good, then you will be blessed. Your life will be blessed and your marriage will be blessed. Your children will be blessed and all that you do will be blessed. Love and belief are choices. We can choose to believe and love God and we will be blessed or we can choose to go our own way. God is good and He is loving. He made a provision for us to know Him and follow Him through Jesus Christ. He made a way for us and His way is good. If you want a good life and a good marriage then He offers it to you through following Him. Obedience comes before understanding. After you obey then you will understand.

A Life with Love Gives Significance

Only someone greater can bless and give significance to someone else.

Now the Lord said to Abram,

“Go forth from your country,
And from your relatives
And from your father’s house,
To the land which I will show you;
And I will make you a great nation,
And I will bless you,
And make your name great;
And so you shall be a blessing;
And I will bless those who bless you,
And the one who curses you I will curse.
And in you all the families of the earth will be blessed.” Genesis 12:1-3

God is greater than all and He is the One who gave Abraham his purpose and meaning in life and He is the One who gives all men and women and children their significance of who they are. He is the Creator and we are His creation. He made us in His image and made us and has given our lives meaning and purpose. When we are restored to a relationship with Him then we will find the meaning and purpose for our lives. He so loved us that He sent His Son to bring us back to Himself.

For Christ also died for sins once for all, the just for the unjust, so that He might bring us to God, I Peter 3:18a

We could not find our way to God so He provided a way for us. When we come to Him then He restores us to a relationship with Him and we become His child.

But as many as received Him, to them He gave the right to become children of God, even to those who believe in His name, John 1:12

We become His child by becoming born again into His family.

Jesus answered, “Truly, truly, I say to you, unless one is born of water and the Spirit he cannot enter into the kingdom of God. That which is born of the flesh is flesh, and that which is born of the Spirit is spirit. Do not be amazed that I said to you, ‘You must be born again.’ John 3:5-7

When we are born again into His family then we have an inheritance.

but you have received a spirit of adoption as sons by which we cry out, “Abba! Father!” The Spirit Himself testifies with our spirit that we are children of God, and if children, heirs also, heirs of God and fellow heirs with Christ, if indeed we suffer with Him so that we may also be glorified with Him. Romans 8:15b-17

The word “Abba” is the same as the affectionate name “Daddy”. We can call God, who becomes our heavenly Father, once we come to know Him, then we can call Him “Daddy”. It is an intimate relationship with God that the Lord brings us into when we come to know Him. We also receive eternal life, which begins the moment we come to know Him. Eternal life is not just living forever but it is knowing God.

This is eternal life, that they may know You, the only true God, and Jesus Christ whom You have sent. John 17:3

Also, when we come to know Him and become His child and become an heir then we also inherit a blessing.

for you were called for the very purpose that you might inherit a blessing. I Peter 3:9b

The Lord gives us meaning and purpose in life when we give our lives to Him. His design is that we would be a blessing to the world. God blesses people so that they might be a blessing. God gives us love so that we might give love to others. God gives us forgiveness so that we might forgive others. The Lord blessed Abraham so that he might be a blessing. The Lord said that through Abraham all of the families of the earth would be blessed because it was through Abraham that Jesus Christ, the Messiah, came into the world.

For when God made the promise to Abraham, since He could swear by no one greater, He swore by Himself, saying, “I will surely bless you and I will surely multiply you.” And so, having patiently waited, he obtained the promise. For men swear by one greater than themselves, and with them an oath given as confirmation is an end of every dispute. In the same way God, desiring even more to show to the heirs of the promise the unchangeableness of His purpose, interposed with an oath, so that by two unchangeable things in which it is impossible for God to lie, we who have taken refuge would have strong encouragement to take hold of the hope set before us. Hebrews 6:13-18

Jesus Christ is the hope of all who have put their trust in Him. We live by faith and wait patiently for Him. Jesus Christ gives meaning and purpose to life. God is love and His love is expressed through Jesus Christ to the world. When Christ lives in a person then they have significance and then they can truly love others because they do not need to get their significance from someone else. Jesus Christ validates them and gives their life meaning. A person is free when they know Christ because they do not need to look to someone else for meaning, purpose, love, validation, significance or any of the other needs that are deep within us. Jesus Christ sets a person free and they are able to love, to forgive and to bless others.

It was for freedom that Christ set us free; Galatians 5:1a

You can never truly love until you are loved. God loves you and has offered you a gift of a great love, and that is to become His child.

See how great a love the Father has bestowed on us, that we would be called children of God; and such we are. I John 3:1