Tag: #love

A Life Understanding Man’s Need for a Lover

God’s design for a wife is that she is to be her husband’s lover. A man’s need for a wife is deeply embedded in his need for a lover. God’s design is so good that a husband will not only be satisfied with his wife as his lover but he will be intoxicated with her love. When Adam saw Eve, his response was (WOW!). The original Hebrew can not adequately translate it into English but that was basically his response.

The man said, “This is now bone of my bones,
And flesh of my flesh;
She shall be called Woman,
Because she was taken out of Man.” Genesis 2:23

The Lord still wants to give a wife to a husband and the Bible says that if the man does it right then on his wedding night he will be so lit up on her love that he will outshine the sun.

In the heavens God has pitched a tent for the sun.
It is like a bridegroom coming out of his chamber, Psalm 19:4b,5a

Understanding a Wife’s Gift to Her Husband as His Lover

A female has the unique privilege to be called a gift, a reward and a favor to a man. The Lord made man with a physical appetite for the most intimate expression of love. A woman does not have the same physical appetite. A woman longs for the love of a man just as a man longs to love a woman. If a man has physical intimacy with a woman outside of marriage then it is “like sitting down and eating a steak dinner”. It will satisfy his appetite for the moment but it will not satisfy his deepest longings and needs. A man longs to know and be known. The word for physical intimacy in the Bible was that the husband was “to know” his wife. A man wants his wife to be unknown by all other men. She is to belong to him alone. A woman is a mystery to a man in many ways and that mystique that she has is part of her beauty. She is a much finer aspect of creation. Her beauty is not just physical but it is in her character, it is in her purity, it is in her innocence and it is her manner.

Enjoy life with the woman whom you love all the days of your fleeting life which He has given to you under the sun; for this is your reward in life and in your toil in which you have labored under the sun. Ecclesiastes 9:9

Understand that God’s ways are the best for girls and women. He does all things well. If you will keep yourself pure and become the woman that God designed you to be then you will be beautiful to the man God gives you to and will be treated like a queen by your king. A man has only one heart and life to give and he wants to give it to a girl who has not been with another man. There is something within a man that compels him to treat a woman of fine character and beauty with respect. Beauty is on the inside and causes any woman to be beautiful to the man that God has designed for her. Also, marry a man who has kept himself pure then he will be faithful to you as he has learned to keep his physical appetites under control.

IF you have not stayed pure then ask God to cleanse your heart, mind and soul. Give yourself to the Lord and He will make you into a new creation. He is the Creator and He is the only One who can make all things new. He can and will restore your purity if you give yourself to Him, but then you must keep yourself pure by His strength. There is always hope in God no matter how much a person has messed up, if they will turn to Him.

Therefore if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creature; the old things passed away; behold, new things have come. II Corinthians 5:17

A Life Understanding a Man’s Need for a Wife

When God created man and the rest of creation it was good. There was not anything to add to it or anything to take from it. The Bible says that God works in such  a way so than man would fear (which means a very awe inspiring respect) Him and honor Him. Man was made perfect and all of creation was made perfect so that it was a delight to the Lord. However, the Lord said that it was not good for the man to be alone. It was not good then and it is not good now. A man needs a wife. He needs her support, her companionship, her love and respect and when he has a good wife then he becomes an even better man than he would be alone. Her encouragement, her response to him, her smiles, her affections, her happiness in being his wife inspires him to even greater heights than what he would do alone. An excellent wife is his crown and makes him a king who can conquer much and achieve much when there is peace and harmony in his kingdom.

An excellent wife is the crown of her husband, But she who shames him is like rottenness in his bones. Proverbs 12:4

Understanding What a Man Needs in a Wife

A man needs a wife. If a woman learns to become an excellent wife then she will be greatly exalted for the first thing that anyone notices about a king is his crown. A king’s crown is his glory. A man does not need someone who will shame him. The Bible says that a man will encounter the “reproofs of life” and those reproofs of life are very effective in correcting a man. A man needs his wife’s support, love, intimacy, friendship, companionship and trust. You will be more precious than jewels to him when you become the wife that God wants you to be.

An excellent wife, who can find? For her worth is far above jewels. Proverbs 31:10

Do not be a man’s conscience. A man fights with his conscience and if you want fighting in your marriage and home then that is a sure way to get it.

A Life Understanding the Man’s Leadership Role

The Lord made man to rule and gave him the position to rule over creation. The Lord made man to work and to rule in the world. Every man is a king in his own eyes. This is not a bad thing because they Lord made man to be a ruler. Man is not egotistical in feeling this way but he does need help to rule. He longs for a queen to rule with him and be a helper and a support to him. The Lord said that it was not good for the man to be alone.

Then the Lord God said, “It is not good for the man to be alone; I will make him a helper suitable for him.” Genesis 2:18

Understanding the Woman’s Support Role

He needs a woman to be his queen and his helper and support. He will recognize her by the fact that the Lord has made her to be suitable for him and to correspond to him. This means that she will understand his heart and she will respond to his heart. The Lord made her to be a support to him and such a strong support that the word has the meaning to be as strong as cement. She will not waver in her support of him but will believe in him when no one else does.  She will be so important to him that he will see her as a savior in many ways. (The word “helper” in this verse refers to the wife and it is the only time in Scripture where it refers to a person. Every other time it refers to God.) She will be stronger than him emotionally but he will be stronger than her physically. They will need each other and as they become one then they will conquer together. They will share each other’s joys and sorrows and each other’s successes and failures. When he is down, she will be up so that they do not sink together. They will encourage and pray for one another. Together they will make it if they will put their trust in the Lord because God has decreed it.

The man gave names to all the cattle, and to the birds of the sky, and to every beast of the field, but for Adam there was not found a helper suitable for him. So the Lord God caused a deep sleep to fall upon the man, and he slept; then He took one of his ribs and closed up the flesh at that place. The Lord God fashioned into a woman the rib which He had taken from the man, and brought her to the man. The man said,

“This is now bone of my bones,
And flesh of my flesh;
She shall be called Woman,
Because she was taken out of Man.” Genesis 2:20-23

Understand that a young lady who learns to treat a man like a king will never lack male friends. When a young lady can see who the young man is becoming and be an encouragement then she will thrive in her relationships and friendships with men. Most men long to be a king, because that is who God has made them to be, but they still lack the confidence and maturity. As a young man chooses to follow the Lord then he will become the person that God designed him to be and he will one day look for the girl who sees him as the man of God that was created to rule in God’s creation. He is not looking for a girl who will compete with him or who feels the need to “put him in his place”. There is plenty of competition and the world is continually “putting him in his place”. He needs a comforter and one who will encourage him. He needs a girl who will believe the best in him and see him for the person that God sees him as. He needs a girl who will stick with him and love and respect him in times of better or worse. A man who believes in the Lord will believe in what the Lord has for him and blessed will be the young lady who becomes his helper, his support and his queen. He will choose her to be his wife and he will be her husband.

A Life that Is Kind

It is often easy to be kind to those who are kind to us but what separates Christians from others is that they are to be like their Lord who was kind to evil and ungrateful people.

Luke 6:35b …for He Himself is kind to ungrateful and evil men.

The Lord says that difficult times will come and people will be ungrateful except the Lord wants us to love them and to be kind to them anyway.

II Timothy 3:1,2 But realize this, that in the last days difficult times will come. For men will be lovers of self, lovers of money, boastful, arrogant, revilers, disobedient to parents, ungrateful…

It is hard to be kind to ungrateful and evil people and the only way that we can do it is through Him and by His Holy Spirit. He showed us His way when He loved us.

Romans 5:8 But God demonstrates His own love toward us, in that while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us.

The light shines the brightest when it is the darkest and the Lord has told us that we are the light of the world. Even though we may not want to and it is not in us to be kind to evil and ungrateful people the Lord still wants us to be kind and loving. It is when we are the most like Jesus that the world will see in us something that they do not have. If we love those who are like us or who are loving and kind then we are not any different than the rest of the world.

Luke 6:32,33 If you love those who love you, what credit is that to you? For even sinners love those who love them. If you do good to those who do good to you, what credit is that to you? For even sinners do the same.

Our Heavenly Father wants us to be like Him and wants the world to see Jesus in us. The only way that they can see Jesus in us is if we respond to people the way Jesus would have if He were here on earth. He wants others to see Jesus just as if He were in the flesh, in other words, He wants us to live out in the flesh the life of Christ.

Luke 6:35,36 But love your enemies, and do good, and lend, expecting nothing in return; and your reward will be great, and you will be sons of the Most High; for He Himself is kind to ungrateful and evil men. Be merciful, just as your Father is merciful.

He has adopted us into His family and told us what it means to be His child. The Lord has called us to be different and when we are then the world will see Christ in us.

Matthew 5:44-48 But I say to you, love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you, so that you may be sons of your Father who is in heaven; for He causes His sun to rise on the evil and the good, and sends rain on the righteous and the unrighteous. For if you love those who love you, what reward do you have? Do not even the tax collectors do the same? If you greet only your brothers, what more are you doing than others? Do not even the Gentiles do the same? Therefore you are to be perfect, as your heavenly Father is perfect.

 

A Life Understanding a Man’s Need to Lead

The Lord made men and women to rule. Both men and women are to lead. Each one has their own sphere of influence. The Lord designed for man to rule in the world. A man is born to be a leader. He is to lead not only in the world and in his workplace but also in his home. It does not mean that he is better than anyone, for leadership is a position given by God. A man must first learn to lead and he does so by being under leadership. There is a chain of authority that begins with God. As long as Adam was under God’s leadership and authority then he would rule well. A man who wants to do what is right will recognize and respect authority in others. For this reason, an older man can be under a younger man. A man understands that with authority comes responsibility. A man will respect another man, even if he is younger, by his wisdom and skill in leading and his faithfulness to fulfill his responsibility.  A man was made to lead as the Lord leads and when he does, those who are under him are blessed.

‘He who rules over men righteously,
Who rules in the fear of God,
Is as the light of the morning when the sun rises,
A morning without clouds,
When the tender grass springs out of the earth,
Through sunshine after rain.’ II Samuel 23:3b,4

Women were also made to rule but when Eve sinned the Lord put her under Adam’s authority. The Lord did this to protect her from being deceived again. Girls were never designed to be on their own even when they are older than the “legal” age. They are to go from their father’s authority to their husband’s authority. It is the father who gives his daughter to the man who is to love her and be her leader. For this reason, it is very important that a daughter stay under her father’s authority until marriage. Her father is her protection from boys and later men who would like to take advantage of her. Her father loves his daughter and will not give his daughter to a man who will be abusive.

So then both he who gives his own virgin daughter in marriage does well,  I Corinthians 7:38a

Do understand that a woman can not see through a man but a man can see through another man. Do go to your father for advice on any boy that is interested in you. When your father sees that you are looking to him for advice then he will most likely want to give it. However, if your father thinks that you have already made up your mind to do what you want to do then he will often not say anything. You need your father’s counsel. Other than your decision to become a Christian, the most important decision that you will make will be who you marry. The Lord gave you parents and especially fathers, to help you.

A Life Understanding a Man’s Work

Understanding Men and His Work

Man was made from the dust, or in other words, man was made from the earth and he relates to the earth. Men do not mind getting dirty when they work because it is a part of work. One of the first things that the Lord gave man to do was to work. He gave him a job to do and that was to cultivate the earth and to name the animals. Men need to work in the world. Men receive their identity and self respect from their work. One of the first things that a man is asked is. “what do you do?”. When a man can take healthy pride in his work that he has done his best then he feels good about himself. A man is at home in the world and he feels at home when he is outside in nature. A man appreciates what he works for. A good man wants to work for what he gets and he does not want handouts. A man respects another man’s work and understands that he needs to be paid for his services. A man needs to be respected in his work and the Lord gave man a job to do in naming the animals and the Lord respected Adam’s work. Whatever name Adam gave to an animal, then that became the animal’s name and the Lord accepted it.

Then the Lord God took the man and put him into the garden of Eden to cultivate it and keep it. Genesis 2:15

Out of the ground the Lord God formed every beast of the field and every bird of the sky, and brought them to the man to see what he would call them; and whatever the man called a living creature, that was its name. Genesis 2:19

Understanding Women and Her Work

Woman was made from a person and she relates to people. She was not given a job in the world to do like Adam was given. Her job was to be Adam’s helper or support. The word “support” literally has the meaning of being something like cement. She is to be such a support to Adam that he knows that she will be faithful and immovable in her support of him. He needs for her to become all that God designed her to be so that he can become all that God designed him to be. A woman gets her identity and love from people. Often as a child, a girl will play with dolls and pretend to be a “mommy” and she will imagine what it will be like when she has her “own” family and home. As she matures she will be sometimes be asked. “do you have a boyfriend?” and when she is older the first question that she is often asked is, “are you married?” or “do you have children?”. Later on in life, she will be asked, “do you have grandchildren?”. She sees herself as who she is in relationship to people and will say that she is a mother or grandmother. If she works outside of the home she will usually go into a people oriented field, such as doctor, nurse, teacher, etc. A woman also can make an excellent business woman but for different reasons than a man. However, a mother who works outside of her home is often torn between her job and her family. When her children are conceived, they are a part of her. She begins to be intimately acquainted with her children even when they are in her womb. When a working mother comes home she will work some more because God made her world to be her home and her home is a major part of her world. No one can take care of her home and children like she can and the Lord made her that way. Just as a man takes pride in his job, so a woman takes pride in her home and her family. She cares about the way her home looks and how her children are fed and dressed. God made her to nurture and to make a home for her family. She does not like dirt and some women will clean and clean their home. A man has to learn these things. It is not natural for him, but if he loves his wife and children then he will seek to learn what is important to his wife in the home and with the children.

Then the Lord God said, “It is not good for the man to be alone; I will make him a helper suitable for him.” Genesis 2:18

So the Lord God caused a deep sleep to fall upon the man, and he slept; then He took one of his ribs and closed up the flesh at that place. The Lord God fashioned into a woman the rib which He had taken from the man, and brought her to the man. The man said,

“This is now bone of my bones,
And flesh of my flesh;
She shall be called Woman,
Because she was taken out of Man.” Genesis 2:21-23

Understand that men and women are different. They were each made unique and they are wired differently. One is not better than the other but they are very different. Their longings, desires and needs are different. The more you understand the needs of a young man then the more you will be blessed and the less you will be hurt. You will be far more satisfied when you learn to appreciate the differences and not try to make men like women nor women like men. A man is happiest when he is fulfilling his calling as a man and a woman is happiest when she is fulfilling her calling as a woman.

A Life Understanding Boys and Men

Do Receive Understanding

As with anything, if you want to understand a subject matter then the best way to understand it is to go to the one who created the subject. The one who created anything can give you the greatest understanding, not only “about” the subject but the understanding of the “manner” of the subject.

The fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom, And the knowledge of the Holy One is understanding. Proverbs 9:10

If a girl wants to understand boys or if women want to understand men then they must go to the One who created man in the beginning. Not only will He give them understanding but He will give them instruction (which is wisdom) on what to do and what not to do so that they may not get hurt. Many girls and women have been hurt by boys and men simply because they did not understand boys and men.

Do Not Trust Your Own Understanding

Do not trust your own understanding of males of what you think they are like. A female will look at a male through their own perspective and try to “figure” him out. A male is made completely different than a female.  He thinks completely different than a female, he acts completely different and he does not have feelings the way a female does. Neither a male or female is right or wrong but they are different and will have different perspectives, thoughts, actions and reactions to the same situations. Do not trust in what you think you should do or in what your friends think you should do.

Trust in the Lord with all your heart And do not lean on your own understanding. Proverbs 3:5

Do trust in the Lord with all of your heart and go to the Lord and ask Him for wisdom and understanding. He wants to help you.

A Life with Love is A Promise Kept

Love is keeping a promise. When one does not keep their promises then they lose all credibility, not only with the one whom they have broken the promise, but with all others. A promise made should be a promise kept. Love gives trust, worth, security, peace, significance, joy and every other good thing that we can imagine but the one who loves is only as good as their word.

in the hope of eternal life, which God, who cannot lie, promised long ages ago, Titus 1:2

God made a promise to Adam and Eve after they sinned that He would have a provision for them. There would come One who would crush Satan on the head. In destroying the work and power of the devil, God would also free man from the power of sin and death through the One whom He would send. The Bible is the history of the Lord fulfilling His promises to man through sending the gift of Jesus Christ, His only begotten Son, through whom we can receive eternal life. For this reason the Bible is the history or “his story” of God’s faithfulness.

The Lord God said to the serpent, “Because you have done this,
Cursed are you more than all cattle,
And more than every beast of the field;
On your belly you will go,
And dust you will eat
All the days of your life;
And I will put enmity
Between you and the woman,
And between your seed and her seed;
He shall bruise you on the head,
And you shall bruise him on the heel.” Genesis 3:14,15

Jesus is the good news that we have heard and He is the One whom God sent to bruise Satan on the head. Jesus Christ defeated death when He went to the cross and God raised Him from the dead. He is alive and those who have put their trust in Him will also receive eternal life. God’s promise beginning with Adam and Eve and again to Abraham and Sarah and again and again through His Words to the prophets was fulfilled in Jesus Christ.

that God has fulfilled this promise to our children in that He raised up Jesus, as it is also written in the second Psalm, ‘You are My Son; today I have begotten You.’ Acts 13:33

Since everyone beginning with Adam and Eve have sinned then it is true that everyone is in need of the promised salvation through faith in Jesus Christ.

But the Scripture has shut up everyone under sin, so that the promise by faith in Jesus Christ might be given to those who believe. Galatians 3:22

The promise of salvation is a promise of life, not only in this life but an eternal life that will be forever. Those who believe in Jesus Christ will never die.

This is the promise which He Himself made to us: eternal life. I John 2:25

God promised a Savior who would come and die for the world. His name is Jesus Christ and He will save His people from their sins.

She will bear a Son; and you shall call His name Jesus, for He will save His people from their sins.” Now all this took place to fulfill what was spoken by the Lord through the prophet: “Behold, the virgin shall be with child and shall bear a Son, and they shall call His name Immanuel,” which translated means, “God with us.” Matthew 1:21-23

This Savior, Jesus Christ, would be crucified, dead and buried and raised from the grave on the third day. He appeared to those who were on earth and then He ascended into heaven.

After that He appeared to more than five hundred brethren at one time, most of whom remain until now, but some have fallen asleep; then He appeared to James, then to all the apostles; and last of all, as to one untimely born, He appeared to me also. I Corinthians 15:6-8

God promised to send the Holy Spirit after Jesus Christ ascended into heaven and the Holy Spirit came and lives within those who belong to Christ.

Therefore having been exalted to the right hand of God, and having received from the Father the promise of the Holy Spirit, He has poured forth this which you both see and hear. Acts 2:33

Those who hear the message of truth, the Good News of salvation and believe in Jesus Christ are sealed in Christ with the Holy Spirit of promise.

In Him, you also, after listening to the message of truth, the gospel of your salvation—having also believed, you were sealed in Him with the Holy Spirit of promise, Ephesians 1:13

The Lord has been faithful and He has fulfilled His promises that He has made in His time. He is faithful to His promises. He has promised to come again and in His time will fulfill that promise also.

Let us hold fast the confession of our hope without wavering, for He who promised is faithful; Hebrews 10:23

Jesus Christ is coming again to receive those who believe in Him. He is faithful and blessed will be those who are full of faith and have believed His promises.

If I go and prepare a place for you, I will come again and receive you to Myself, that where I am, there you may be also. John 14:3

There are and will be many who will laugh and mock at His promises just as they did in the days of Noah. However, God is faithful to His promises and He will not be mocked.

Know this first of all, that in the last days mockers will come with their mocking, following after their own lusts, and saying, “Where is the promise of His coming? For ever since the fathers fell asleep, all continues just as it was from the beginning of creation.” For when they maintain this, it escapes their notice that by the word of God the heavens existed long ago and the earth was formed out of water and by water, through which the world at that time was destroyed, being flooded with water. But by His word the present heavens and earth are being reserved for fire, kept for the day of judgment and destruction of ungodly men. But do not let this one fact escape your notice, beloved, that with the Lord one day is like a thousand years, and a thousand years like one day. II Peter 3:3-8

It is only God’s mercy that continues to allow men, women and children to call on Him. He wants all to repent and come to Him. He wants all to be saved.

The Lord is not slow about His promise, as some count slowness, but is patient toward you, not wishing for any to perish but for all to come to repentance. II Peter 3:9

He takes no delight in anyone perishing. Whoever will call on Him can be saved. He is not slow about His promise of coming again.

But if the wicked man turns from all his sins which he has committed and observes all My statutes and practices justice and righteousness, he shall surely live; he shall not die. All his transgressions which he has committed will not be remembered against him; because of his righteousness which he has practiced, he will live. Do I have any pleasure in the death of the wicked,” declares the Lord God, “rather than that he should turn from his ways and live? Ezekiel 18:21-23

If you have not done so, while you have the opportunity, turn to the Lord and turn away from your sins. The Lord will not remember your sins when He comes again if you turn to Jesus Christ. The Lord wants to give you life. He is a merciful God and is patient, not desiring for any to perish.

…even so must the Son of Man be lifted up; so that whoever believes will in Him have eternal life. John 3:14b, 15

Love is a choice and He is calling to you in love to come to Him so that your sins may be washed away. He is a forgiving God and He loves you.

As far as the east is from the west, So far has He removed our transgressions from us. Psalm 103:12

The east and the west never meet and this is how far that the Lord will separate your sins from you. You will never see them again and He will not remember them or hold them against you.

I, even I, am the one who wipes out your transgressions for My own sake,
And I will not remember your sins. Isaiah 43:25

The Lord keeps His promises. Love is a promise made and a promise kept.

A Life with Love Is Not Prideful

After Adam sinned he hid himself because he was afraid. He was afraid of how the Lord would respond. No longer was Adam responding to the Lord in obedience but Adam initiated sin and now he was anticipating God’s response. He speculated and presumed that the Lord would not be pleased and may even be angry so he hid himself. The relationship now had gotten turned around because Adam had sinned and it was no longer according to God’s blueprint. God is the initiator and man is the responder. The One who is the leader and begins the relationship is the initiator.

Then God said, “Let Us make man in Our image, according to Our likeness; and let them rule over the fish of the sea and over the birds of the sky and over the cattle and over all the earth, and over every creeping thing that creeps on the earth.” God created man in His own image, in the image of God He created him; male and female He created them. God blessed them; and God said to them, “Be fruitful and multiply, and fill the earth, and subdue it; and rule over the fish of the sea and over the birds of the sky and over every living thing that moves on the earth.” Genesis 1:26-28

God began the love relationship with man and God had a plan for Adam and Eve. He gave them a purpose in life and a calling. He gave the man and woman glory when He made them in the image of God. He crowned them with honor.

What is man that You take thought of him,
And the son of man that You care for him?
Yet You have made him a little lower than God,
And You crown him with glory and majesty!
You make him to rule over the works of Your hands;
You have put all things under his feet,
All sheep and oxen,
And also the beasts of the field,
The birds of the heavens and the fish of the sea,
Whatever passes through the paths of the seas. Psalm 8:4-8

Adam and Eve in their pride and foolishness disobeyed God and were no longer responding to His love for them. They thought they knew better than God. They became in a sense like God but since they were not God, they failed miserably and lost everything. They lost their fellowship with God and they lost their glory and honor. They lost the trust that God had in them. They lost their home. They lost the joy of being in God’s presence. They lost experiencing His love. They lost it all because of their pride.

When pride comes, then comes dishonor,
But with the humble is wisdom. Proverbs 11:2

In a similar way, the man is the leader in his relationship with a woman. He is to be the initiator and she is to be the responder. The man is the one who initiates and begins the marriage. God has made the husband to be primarily responsible for the marriage.

Then the Lord God said, “It is not good for the man to be alone; I will make him a helper suitable for him.” Genesis 2:18

The woman is called to respond to and follow her husband. It is a woman’s pride that makes her want to control the relationship. It is not God’s blueprint for marriage. God made the man first and brought the woman to him. If you want your marriage to be successful then you must follow God’s plan and have your marriage be built after God’s blueprint.

So the Lord God caused a deep sleep to fall upon the man, and he slept; then He took one of his ribs and closed up the flesh at that place. The Lord God fashioned into a woman the rib which He had taken from the man, and brought her to the man. The man said, “This is now bone of my bones,
And flesh of my flesh;
She shall be called Woman,
Because she was taken out of Man.” Genesis 2:21-23

The marriage relationship is to be a picture of God’s relationship with man. If you are a wife then your relationship with your husband is a picture of your relationship with the Lord. If you are a husband then your relationship with your wife is a picture of how well you understand and know the Lord and His love and how obedient you are to Him.

This mystery is great; but I am speaking with reference to Christ and the church. Nevertheless, each individual among you also is to love his own wife even as himself, and the wife must see to it that she respects her husband. Ephesians 5:32,33

If a wife is and does as God has called her to be and do, then she will be the crown of her husband. She will receive glory and be crowned with honor.

An excellent wife is the crown of her husband, Proverbs 12:4a

If the husband does and is as God would have him then he will have that excellent wife whose worth far exceeds jewels. His heart will trust her and he will not lack gain. She will do him good all the days of her life.

An excellent wife, who can find?
For her worth is far above jewels.
The heart of her husband trusts in her,
And he will have no lack of gain.
She does him good and not evil
All the days of her life. Proverbs 31:10-12

A Life that Overcomes Bitterness

Bitterness is one of the most damaging emotions. Bitterness can be an unresolved hurt in our hearts. Someone hurt us and we can still feel it as if it just happened yesterday. Bitterness can be a wound that has never been healed. It will cause you trouble and poison many.

Hebrews 12:15 See to it that no one comes short of the grace of God; that no root of bitterness springing up causes trouble, and by it many be defiled;

When sin abounds then God’s grace abounds also but unless we receive His grace and are healed from the hurt and pain of wounds from others we will become bitter.

Romans 5:20,21 The Law came in so that the transgression would increase; but where sin increased, grace abounded all the more, so that, as sin reigned in death, even so grace would reign through righteousness to eternal life through Jesus Christ our Lord.

Grace reigns through righteousness to eternal life which is through Jesus Christ our Lord. When you do what is right after someone has done you wrong, and you can only do this through God’s grace, then you will be set free from the bitterness which would result from not experiencing His grace. If you will turn to Him in your pain then He will heal you and restore you.

Exodus 15:26 And He said, “If you will give earnest heed to the voice of the Lord your God, and do what is right in His sight, and give ear to His commandments, and keep all His statutes, I will put none of the diseases on you which I have put on the Egyptians; for I, the Lord, am your healer.”

The opposite of bitterness is thankfulness. He will remove the bitterness and fill your heart with gratitude and joy. Only the Lord can do this but He can and He wants to.

I Thessalonians 5:18 in everything give thanks; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus.

Bitterness also comes from forsaking the Lord.

Jeremiah 2:19 Your own wickedness will correct you,
And your apostasies will reprove you;
Know therefore and see that it is evil and bitter
For you to forsake the Lord your God,
And the dread of Me is not in you,” declares the Lord God of hosts.

Bitterness can come from the misfortune of bereavement.

Ruth 1:20 She said to them, “Do not call me Naomi; call me Mara, for the Almighty has dealt very bitterly with me.

The Lord healed Naomi and she became the great great grandmother of King David. The Lord restored her joy. She trusted the Lord and He was faithful to her.

Ruth 4:16,17 Then Naomi took the child and laid him in her lap, and became his nurse. The neighbor women gave him a name, saying, “A son has been born to Naomi!” So they named him Obed. He is the father of Jesse, the father of David.

Bitterness can come from unfulfilled desires and longings. Hannah was greatly sorrowful that she could not have any children.

I Samuel 1:10 She, greatly distressed, prayed to the Lord and wept bitterly.

Hannah turned to the Lord and the Lord heard her prayer and gave her a son, who became the last judge and first prophet in Israel. Her prayer that is recorded became Mary’s prayer when she found out that she was going to bear a Son and His name would be Jesus, the Son of God.

I Samuel 2:1,2 Then Hannah prayed and said, “My heart exults in the Lord;
My horn is exalted in the Lord,
My mouth speaks boldly against my enemies,
Because I rejoice in Your salvation.
There is no one holy like the Lord,
Indeed, there is no one besides You,
Nor is there any rock like our God.

When you experience great loss then you might feel bitter. Job lost everything but his wife and then she also tried to get him to forsake the Lord.

Job 3:20 Why is light given to him who suffers,
And life to the bitter of soul,

Job was faithful to the Lord and the Lord restored his fortunes and gave him even more.

Job 42:10 The Lord restored the fortunes of Job when he prayed for his friends, and the Lord increased all that Job had twofold.

Great sorrow and pain comes to all of us at some time in our life. How we respond to it will determine whether our life becomes bitter or sweet. If we turn to Him, He is faithful and will not disappoint you, for that is the promise He has made to us.

Romans 10:11 For the Scripture says, “Whoever believes in Him will not be disappointed.”

If you don’t turn to Him then your bitterness will eat you up and destroy you from the inside and will make it’s way out through your countenance and your tongue. Not only will it destroy you but it will defile those around you, as mentioned earlier. Don’t substitute what the Lord wants to give to you. His plan for you is sweet. It is the devil who wants to rob you through bitterness.

Isaiah 5:20 Woe to those who call evil good, and good evil;
Who substitute darkness for light and light for darkness;
Who substitute bitter for sweet and sweet for bitter!

Turn to the Lord in you sorrow, loss, disappointment and unfulfilled desires and longings. He will give to you even more than what you can imagine and He has a plan for your life that is good for you and sweet.