guidance for women – Page 2 – Instructions To A Young Life

A Married Life Filled with Love

There are things that destroy love and there are requirements of love that are essential to lasting love. One of the roots of true love is moral excellence. There must be trust and respect to have true love in a marriage and the prerequisite to love, trust and respect is moral excellence. If you want true love within the marriage then you need to have moral excellence before marriage. Moral excellence is not compromising morally. If someone has moral excellence before marriage then they will almost always have moral excellence after marriage. Immorality is taking something that is not yours to take. A man has no right to any physical affection that he would not have with his sister. Any kind of physical affection has meaning to a female. Until a man takes a woman to be his wife he is to treat her with the same respect that he would treat his sister or mother.

II Peter 1:5-7 Now for this very reason also, applying all diligence, in your faith supply moral excellence, and in your moral excellence, knowledge, and in your knowledge, self-control, and in your self-control, perseverance, and in your perseverance, godliness, and in your godliness, brotherly kindness, and in your brotherly kindness, love.

A good measure of how to treat another one of the opposite sex is if this person married your best friend would there be any awkwardness. You do not know who you will marry so do not speculate or presume. Through presumption comes strife.

Proverbs 13:10a Through pride and presumption come nothing but strife,

A great marriage is when two people become one in every way. Marriage is the only way it is possible for two people to become one spiritually, mentally, emotionally and physically. When there is a violation of God’s ways then it prevents the oneness from happening and that leads to emptiness and frustration. Moral excellence is the requirement for oneness and love, trust and respect is what allows oneness to happen. Oneness spiritually can happen with anyone who is a Christian and so for there to be spiritual oneness in marriage both spouses must be Christians.

II Corinthians 6:14,15 Do not be bound together with unbelievers; for what partnership have righteousness and lawlessness, or what fellowship has light with darkness? Or what harmony has Christ with Belial, or what has a believer in common with an unbeliever?

Once there is the common faith in Christ then it is good for there to be attraction of a friendship. This is the oneness of soul. Again, no physical because that is a lack of moral excellence and once there is the physical then the soul aspect becomes secondary. The Lord chose Eve to first be a companion to Adam and a great marriage is great companionship and friendship. In a great marriage there is a great need for clear communication and this is developed through friendship. One of the best ways to see what a person is like is to see how they interact in a group of friends. When a man and a woman spend much time alone together, even on the friendship level, then at least one of them will become emotionally attached and the breaking of the friendship will be painful and especially if there has been any defrauding. Defrauding is communicating that there is more to the relationship than there really is. Defrauding is a lack of moral excellence.

I Thessalonians 4:3-8 For this is the will of God, your sanctification; that is, that you abstain from sexual immorality; that each of you know how to possess his own vessel in sanctification and honor, not in lustful passion, like the Gentiles who do not know God; and that no man transgress and defraud his brother in the matter because the Lord is the avenger in all these things, just as we also told you before and solemnly warned you. For God has not called us for the purpose of impurity, but in sanctification. So, he who rejects this is not rejecting man but the God who gives His Holy Spirit to you.

The third aspect of oneness in a great marriage is the oneness physically. You will be very glad if you wait. There is a peace, comfort, joy, security and great love for the couples who wait until marriage for the physical. It is so great that the Lord says that the man will outshine the sun when he comes out of his bedroom on his wedding night.

Psalm 19:1-5 The heavens are telling of the glory of God;
And their expanse is declaring the work of His hands.
Day to day pours forth speech,
And night to night reveals knowledge.
There is no speech, nor are there words;
Their voice is not heard.
Their line has gone out through all the earth,
And their utterances to the end of the world.
In them He has placed a tent for the sun,
Which is as a bridegroom coming out of his chamber;

A man loses as much as a woman if he compromises before his wedding night. He has made his wife feel guilty and when they are intimate after marriage it will be a reminder to her of her guilt. She will not trust him like she would if he had exercised self control before marriage. Before marriage she may have thought it was love but after marriage she will realize that it was lust. They both lose and will struggle for the oneness that God designed.

A Married Life Overflowing with Love

Everyone who is married longs for there to be true love in the marriage. Love is the sweet fragrance of a great marriage and the if you have love in your marriage then it truly cuts your sorrows in half and doubles your joys. Without love then life and marriage is much harder and eventually can become bitter or lifeless. Love softens the blows that life sometimes brings that are out of our control. Love is the oil in relationships and without it relationships are a grind that can wear us down. Most marriages begin with good intentions but many do not know how to live out the desires and dreams that were there at the beginning.

I John 4:7,8 Beloved, let us love one another, for love is from God; and everyone who loves is born of God and knows God. The one who does not love does not know God, for God is love.

God is love and there is no love a part from God. We do not know love a part from the Lord and we can not love a part from the Lord Jesus Christ. There may be duty, obligation or even a selfish love a part from the Lord but there will never be an agape love which is an unselfish, unconditional love apart from Jesus Christ. God came to us through Jesus Christ to show us what true love is and how we can experience it and know it. You must have Christ in your life to love and to be loved. We are untrusting creatures and don’t even know how to receive or give love. When we come into an encounter with Jesus Christ and receive Him then we are loved just the way we are and we can learn to love others just the way they are.

Romans 5:8 But God demonstrates His own love toward us, in that while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us.

God loves us. Christ died for us when we did not love Him and had turned our back on Him. Jesus Christ loves us just the way we are with an unconditional, agape love. We are complete in Him and do not need the approval of others. He will always have our back and will never turn His back on us. He will never leave us or forsake us, even when it feels as though all others have and we are alone.

Hebrews 13:4,5 Marriage is to be held in honor among all, and the marriage bed is to be undefiled; for fornicators and adulterers God will judge. Make sure that your character is free from the love of money, being content with what you have; for He Himself has said, “I will never desert you, nor will I ever forsake you,”

We do not need to have the “boastful pride of man” nor do we need to fulfill the lusts of the flesh or the lusts of the eyes when we have Christ. He is our glory and He will never leave us. We do not have to ever be lonely again. Being lonely is not His will and He wants His people to have a home. He wants you to have a home.

Psalm 68:6 God makes a home for the lonely;
He leads out the prisoners into prosperity,
Only the rebellious dwell in a parched land.

Rebellion is simply wanting to go your own way. If you have gone your own way and you are lonely in your marriage then turn to the Lord with all of your heart. He will fill your loneliness and fill you with love for your marriage partner. He will teach you how to love His way.

Galatians 6:9,10 Let us not lose heart in doing good, for in due time we will reap if we do not grow weary. So then, while we have opportunity, let us do good to all people, and especially to those who are of the household of the faith.

The word “good” means the “highest form of love”. The Lord will show you how to “do good” to your spouse. In due time you will reap if you do not grow weary. He will show you the opportunities to do good. The Lord will teach you.

A Life that Begins Marriage Right

The beginning of marriage starts before you even meet the person that you are to marry. This may sound a little strange but most, if not all, of the problems in marriage are the weeds of the seeds that were planted before marriage. How much easier it is to only plant good plants with good fruit in our marriage rather than to allow the seeds of weeds or plants with bad fruit to be sown. We all reap what we sow.

Galatians 6:7-9 Do not be deceived, God is not mocked; for whatever a man sows, this he will also reap. For the one who sows to his own flesh will from the flesh reap corruption, but the one who sows to the Spirit will from the Spirit reap eternal life. Let us not lose heart in doing good, for in due time we will reap if we do not grow weary.

There are three enemies of a great marriage. These three enemies will destroy the love that God designed. A great marriage can be the closest experience to heaven if done God’s way. The Lord designed for marriage to be the closest picture of God’s love.

I John 2:15,16 Do not love the world nor the things in the world. If anyone loves the world, the love of the Father is not in him. For all that is in the world, the lust of the flesh and the lust of the eyes and the boastful pride of life, is not from the Father, but is from the world.

The word “lust” literally means desire. When we lust for something then we are simply desiring something that is outside of God’s will. God’s will is perfect and His love is perfect. When we succumb to a lust then we have given in to a desire that is not a part of His will and it will bring destruction to our lives and the lives of those around us. A great marriage is made of two people who have learned to not give in to the lust of the flesh or the lust of the eyes. They also have recognized the deceitfulness and emptiness of the boastful pride of life. These three things will destroy love in a marriage but they must be dealt with in a person’s life before they are married. We take into a marriage who we are. If we have failed in these areas then we are taking into our marriage the seeds of failure that will reap a marriage without true love or respect. You can not keep covered up who you are in your heart.

James 1:12-17 Blessed is a man who perseveres under trial; for once he has been approved, he will receive the crown of life which the Lord has promised to those who love Him. Let no one say when he is tempted, “I am being tempted by God”; for God cannot be tempted by evil, and He Himself does not tempt anyone. But each one is tempted when he is carried away and enticed by his own lust. Then when lust has conceived, it gives birth to sin; and when sin is accomplished, it brings forth death. Do not be deceived, my beloved brethren. Every good thing given and every perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of lights, with whom there is no variation or shifting shadow.

It is through learning to persevere under the trials of life that our character is formed. Blessed in the man or woman and blessed will be their marriage if they have learned before marriage to flee from temptation and to turn to the Lord with all of their heart to receive His grace to do life right. If you can seek Jesus Christ and learn to walk in His ways before marriage then your marriage will be a picture of life rather than death. If you give into your lusts before marriage then you will be greatly tempted after marriage and it is you, yourself who will bring about the death of your marriage. Marriage is a gift from the Lord that He wants to give to His children but it must be done God’s way.

Ecclesiastes 3:14 I know that everything God does will remain forever; there is nothing to add to it and there is nothing to take from it, for God has so worked that men should fear Him.

The Lord is perfect in all His ways and there is nothing to add to it and nothing to take from it. God has so worked that we should fear and honor Him. He is good and His love is perfect. When you do marriage God’s way then you will praise Him for His good and perfect gift.

Philippians 4:13 I can do all things through Him who strengthens me.

It is most important to remember than you can only have a great marriage through Jesus Christ alone. He is the One who designed marriage and He is the One who will give you the strength and wisdom in how to do marriage right. If you did not start marriage right then He will help you if you turn to Him with all of your heart. Where sin, which is giving into lust, abounds His grace and love abounds all the more. There is no life and no marriage that is beyond His grace and mercy.

Romans 5:20b,21 but where sin increased, grace abounded all the more, so that, as sin reigned in death, even so grace would reign through righteousness to eternal life through Jesus Christ our Lord.

Just as when sin reigns in a person’s life there will be death when grace reigns in a person’s life then there will be righteousness, or in other words, the life and marriage will be done right with the outcome of life. However, the grace, righteousness and life is only through Jesus Christ.

A Life Free of Snags and Snares

There are two things that will hold us back from fulfilling the purposes of our life and they are snags and snares. A snag is something that is beyond our control but will be an obstacle to achieving our purpose in life. A snare is a trap that ensnares us and is something that will hold us back.

Proverbs 13:14 The teaching of the wise is a fountain of life, To turn aside from the snares of death.

Wisdom will help you recognize the snares so that you can turn aside from them rather than fall into the snares of death.

Proverbs 14:27 The fear of the Lord is a fountain of life, That one may avoid the snares of death.

When a person fears the Lord then they will avoid the snares of death. They will stay away from the paths where the snares are hidden traps to ensnare the foolish who walk along the paths that lead to death.

Proverbs 22:5 Thorns and snares are in the way of the perverse; He who guards himself will be far from them.

A perverse person is one who is perverted in their thinking and one expression of a perverted person is that they will use curse words. Guard your mouth and your will protect yourself. One of the first ways that children learn to rebel is in their language. When you have children never allow them to use curse words. Children are attracted to other children by the language they use, whether it is pure or perverted.

Proverbs 17:20 He who has a crooked mind finds no good, And he who is perverted in his language falls into evil.

The only way that your children will never use perverted language is if they never hear it. Do you ever use curse words or watch movies with curse words? You may think that this is not important but young men are attracted to a lady whose speech is gracious rather than perverted. A man and a woman who will make a good marriage will not use curse words.

Proverbs 22:11 He who loves purity of heart
And whose speech is gracious, the king is his friend.

Fearing the Lord and not using curse words go together. The person who fears the Lord will be careful in their speech and even more than that, they will be careful what they listen to, knowing that the mouth speaks from that which fills the heart.

Proverbs 8:13 The fear of the Lord is to hate evil; Pride and arrogance and the evil way And the perverted mouth, I hate.

Snags in life are situations that we have no control over but they hold us back. What do you do about snags? Well, to those who love the Lord, the snag is something that will allow them to see His power and His love for them. He can and will remove it if that is His will. He is greater than all and will not allow anything to happen that will prevent His will and plan from being accomplished in your life. He causes all things to work together for good to those who love Him.

Romans 8:28 And we know that God causes all things to work together for good to those who love God, to those who are called according to His purpose.

The Lord wants us to walk by faith and trust Him. He will accomplish His purposes in our life and when He removes the snags it will be His confirmation that this is something that He wants to accomplish.

Job 42:2 I know that You can do all things, And that no purpose of Yours can be thwarted.

Give thanks to the Lord for the snag for he wants you to trust Him. There is nothing impossible with Him.

Matthew 19:26 And looking at them Jesus said to them, “With people this is impossible, but with God all things are possible.”

Man’s impossiblities are God’s opportunities. Trust Him and see His salvation. He delights in showing His glory.

John 11:40 Jesus said to her, “Did I not say to you that if you believe, you will see the glory of God?”

Jesus is saying the same thing to us today, “Did I not say to you that if you believe, you will see the glory of God?” Is there something that is holding you back that is our of your control? Thank the Lord for it and be still and know that He is God. He will be exalted in your life, for He is God. He will accomplish the purposes for which He created you.

Psalm 46:10 “Cease striving and know that I am God; I will be exalted among the nations, I will be exalted in the earth.”

A Life that Is Wise

Wisdom is applying God’s instructions and commands to your life and living accordingly. Wisdom is living out God’s Word and living by God’s ways in every area of your life. All of our life is connected in one way or another. What we did yesterday affects our life today. What we will do tomorrow will have an impact on us and will bring us life or death to our soul and our body.

Proverbs 9:12 If you are wise, you are wise for yourself,
And if you scoff, you alone will bear it.

What goes into our mind influences our decisions just as what goes into our body affects the health of our body. If you want to be mentally and emotionally healthy then you must guard what goes into your mind and heart.

Proverbs 4:23 Watch over your heart with all diligence,
For from it flow the springs of life.

You may not want to apply God’s Words to you life just as when we were younger we did not want to always eat vegetables but if we ate what was right then our body would function right. If you will live by God’s Words, whether you like them or not, then you will function right in your mind and your heart. You will be healthy mentally and emotionally. You will be very pleased with the outcome. You will not be disappointed.

Proverbs 3:5,6 Trust in the Lord with all your heart
And do not lean on your own understanding.
In all your ways acknowledge Him,
And He will make your paths straight.

You will not always understand God’s ways and that is okay. You do not need to understand them to do them just as you may not understand how a computer works to use it. The more you keep God’s commandments then the more you will understand them. However, understanding comes after obedience to them.

Proverbs 4:20-22 My son, give attention to my words;
Incline your ear to my sayings.
Do not let them depart from your sight;
Keep them in the midst of your heart.
For they are life to those who find them
And health to all their body.

Wisdom will bring life to your spirit, soul and body.

Proverbs 4:5-9 Acquire wisdom! Acquire understanding!
Do not forget nor turn away from the words of my mouth.
Do not forsake her, and she will guard you;
Love her, and she will watch over you.
The beginning of wisdom is: Acquire wisdom;
And with all your acquiring, get understanding.
Prize her, and she will exalt you;
She will honor you if you embrace her.
She will place on your head a garland of grace;
She will present you with a crown of beauty.

If you do not forget her, forsake her nor turn away from the words of her mouth then wisdom will guard you from making wrong decisions. Love her and she will watch over you. Wisdom will help you marry the right person and teach you how to have a great marriage. Wisdom will prevent you from making stupid decisions on your job, in relationships and in every other area. The number of mistakes that you have made in life is an indication of how often you have needed wisdom. How many regrets do you have and how many missed opportunities? Again, wisdom will keep you from these things. Often people will say after great pain that they are a better person for it but if that is so then they would want other people to go through the pain so that they could learn also. You are not a better person for the mistakes that you made but you are a better person for the lesson that you learned. However, how much sweeter life would have been if you had known the right thing to do so that you would not have had to learn the hard way. Who wants to live a life of tears and mistakes? You are not stronger at the broken places but you are more vulnerable where you have fallen so you guard the broken places much more.

Proverbs 4:7-9 The beginning of wisdom is: Acquire wisdom;
And with all your acquiring, get understanding.
Prize her, and she will exalt you;
She will honor you if you embrace her.
She will place on your head a garland of grace;
She will present you with a crown of beauty.

How much sweeter life is with wisdom. When you get wisdom and understanding them you will realize what a precious treasure that you have. You will prize her and embrace wisdom. Wisdom, in turn, will exalt you and honor you. She will place on your head a garland of grace and present you with a crown of beauty. Wisdom will give you that beauty that nothing else can compare to and you will radiate from the inside to the outside. All desirable things can not compare with wisdom.

Proverbs 8:11 For wisdom is better than jewels;
And all desirable things cannot compare with her.

Proverbs 8:17-21 “I love those who love me;
And those who diligently seek me will find me.
“Riches and honor are with me,
Enduring wealth and righteousness.
“My fruit is better than gold, even pure gold,
And my yield better than choicest silver.
“I walk in the way of righteousness,
In the midst of the paths of justice,
To endow those who love me with wealth,
That I may fill their treasuries.

Do you love doing life? Are you excited about what each day holds for you? Are you excited about the future? The Lord wants you to live life to the fullest and you can only do this by wisdom. Just as in a sport, the athlete who gets better and better enjoys the sport proportionately. So it is with life, the more wisdom that you have then the more you will look forward to each day and enjoy life.

Proverbs 10:23 Doing wickedness is like sport to a fool,
And so is wisdom to a man of understanding.

A Life that Lives Above Circumstances

There is a promise in the Bible that is an amazing promise and it is one that says if you do a certain thing then you will ride on the heights of the earth. This means that you will live above the circumstances of every day life. However, as with many of His promises, there is a condition. What does the Lord require of you to live this incredible life?

Isaiah 58:13,14 “If because of the sabbath, you turn your foot
From doing your own pleasure on My holy day,
And call the sabbath a delight, the holy day of the Lord honorable,
And honor it, desisting from your own ways,
From seeking your own pleasure
And speaking your own word,
Then you will take delight in the Lord,
And I will make you ride on the heights of the earth;
And I will feed you with the heritage of Jacob your father,
For the mouth of the Lord has spoken.”

The Lord established the Sabbath commandment at the beginning of creation when the Lord Himself rested on the seventh day of the week. Was He tired? No, the Bible says that the Lord God does not get tired.

Isaiah 40:28 Do you not know? Have you not heard? The Everlasting God, the Lord, the Creator of the ends of the earth does not become weary or tired. His understanding is inscrutable.

The Lord was setting the pattern for work and for life by His example. He does not only teach us but He shows us how to live life. He gave us a day of rest because He is good. He did not make man for the Sabbath but the Sabbath for man.

Mark 2:27 Jesus said to them, “The Sabbath was made for man, and not man for the Sabbath.

Often people will say that they wish they had a day where they did not have to do anything. He has given us a day every week to rest and become refreshed in our relationship with Him. It is not “family day” or a day that we can do things we want to do and because we enjoy them then it is not considered work. No, rather He makes it very clear that we are not to do our own pleasure or live life our way. We are not to seek our own pleasure or speak our own words but we are to honor Him by honoring His holy day. He says that if we do this then we will ride on the heights of the earth. Holy means that it is set a part for Him.

Revelation 1:10 I was in the Spirit on the Lord’s day,

This is the Apostle John speaking. Since Jesus Christ rose again from the dead on Sunday, the first day of the week, Sunday became the Sabbath day for the Christians after the resurrection. Sunday became the day that was set a part from the other days of the week so that they might get together and worship the Lord and rest.

Deuteronomy 5:12-14 ‘Observe the sabbath day to keep it holy, as the Lord your God commanded you. Six days you shall labor and do all your work, but the seventh day is a sabbath of the Lord your God; in it you shall not do any work, you or your son or your daughter or your male servant or your female servant or your ox or your donkey or any of your cattle or your sojourner who stays with you, so that your male servant and your female servant may rest as well as you.

The Lord considered the setting aside one day a week and not doing any work so important that He made it one of the Ten commandments. You will find that if you will keep this commandment then the quality of your life will become much better and you will also “take delight in the Lord”, as He promises.

Psalm 37:4 Delight yourself in the Lord;
And He will give you the desires of your heart.

One of the beautiful characteristics of the Lord is that He does not make you do anything. You don’t have to obey any of His commandments. However, because He is so incredibly good He promises a reward if we delight ourselves in Him. He will give us the desires of our heart.

A Married Life Overflowing with Love

I John 4:7,8 Beloved, let us love one another, for love is from God; and everyone who loves is born of God and knows God. The one who does not love does not know God, for God is love.

Romans 5:8 But God demonstrates His own love toward us, in that while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us.

Hebrews 13:4,5 Marriage is to be held in honor among all, and the marriage bed is to be undefiled; for fornicators and adulterers God will judge. Make sure that your character is free from the love of money, being content with what you have; for He Himself has said, “I will never desert you, nor will I ever forsake you,”

Psalm 68:6 God makes a home for the lonely;
He leads out the prisoners into prosperity,
Only the rebellious dwell in a parched land.

Galatians 6:9,10 Let us not lose heart in doing good, for in due time we will reap if we do not grow weary. So then, while we have opportunity, let us do good to all people, and especially to those who are of the household of the faith.

A Life that Responds

The Lord has called His daughters to be responders. First of all, we need to learn to respond to Him. He is the great pursuer and He longs to have a relationship with you and to fellowship with you on a daily basis and even moment by moment. He loves it when you pray to Him about everything.

Proverbs 15: 8 The sacrifice of the wicked is an abomination to the Lord, But the prayer of the upright is His delight.

He wants you to pray to Him about everything and not to worry about anything.

I Peter 3:4 but let it be the hidden person of the heart, with the imperishable quality of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is precious in the sight of God.

A lady needs to learn to cast all of her cares on Him.

I Peter 5:7 casting all your anxiety on Him, because He cares for you.

He wants you to become a woman after His heart and to learn to respond to His heart rather than go through the motions of being religious.

Deuteronomy 5:29 Oh that they had such a heart in them, that they would fear Me and keep all My commandments always, that it may be well with them and with their sons forever!

David was a man after God’s heart and that is why the Lord chose him to be king of Israel. The Lord will use you in a way that will bring you great joy when you learn to be a woman after God’s heart.

Acts13:22 After He had removed him, He raised up David to be their king, concerning whom He also testified and said, ‘I have found David the son of Jesse, a man after My heart, who will do all My will.’

The Lord is looking for one who will give their heart completely to Him. He will support you and you will abide in His love.

II Chronicles 16:9 For the eyes of the Lord move to and fro throughout the earth that He may strongly support those whose heart is completely His. You have acted foolishly in this. Indeed, from now on you will surely have wars.”

If the Lord is for you then who can be against you? You will always come out victorious. He will withhold nothing from you that you need.

Romans 8:31,32 What then shall we say to these things? If God is for us, who is against us? He who did not spare His own Son, but delivered Him over for us all, how will He not also with Him freely give us all things?

A Life that is Helped and Helps

We all need to help and to be helped. We need to help each other stay on God’s path. We need each other and the Lord has provisions for us. There are three layers of relationships that ladies need to help them stay on God’s path and do what is right.

Hebrew 13:7 Remember those who led you, who spoke the word of God to you; and considering the outcome of their way of life, imitate their faith.

The top layer are those whom you look up to and respect. If you can have a loving relationship with this person then that is great but sometimes it may be someone you admire from a distance whose life inspires you. However, you definitely need some people in the upper layer who love you and will pray for you and keep you accountable. This person sees your needs and wants to see you grow in the Lord. Find people who are growing in their relationship with the Lord whom you want to be like and you want to go where they are going in life. Be careful who you aspire to be like because you will become like the person you allow to teach you. Choose godly women who love the Lord. Look at the fruit in their lives.

Luke 6:40 A pupil is not above his teacher; but everyone, after he has been fully trained, will be like his teacher.

The second layer are the friends that you choose. This layer will love you and want to be with you. Both of you agree that you want to be faithful to the Lord, which means that you want to be faithful to honor your parents or husband, or you both want to be faithful in school or on the job.

Amos 3:3 “Can two walk together, unless they be agreed?”

You both want to follow the Lord and you stimulate one another to do that very thing. You will stick with each other through thick and thin, no matter what the circumstances.

Proverbs 18: 24 …there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother.

You also want your closest friends to be wise people who seek the Lord, fear and respect Him and want to be a disciple of Jesus. A wise person lives each day as though it is his last so that he will be ready to meet the Lord.

Proverbs 13:20 He who walks with wise men will be wise, But the companion of fools will suffer harm.

A fool lives as if there is no God.

Psalm 14:1 The fool has said in his heart, “There is no God.”

Who you choose as your friends is one of the most important decisions you will make in life. Choose right and you will treasure them and you will bless each other. Choose wrong and you will end up in situations you never intended to be and you will go places you never wanted to go. A true friend is more concerned about your relationship with the Lord than your relationship with them.

Proverbs 17:17 A friend loves at all times,

The last layer is the bottom layer and this layer are the girls or young ladies who look up to you. This layer keeps you on the straight and narrow because you do not want to disappoint them. Often they think that you can do no wrong. Of course you know the truth about yourself but they truly believe the best in you. Also, this layer is important because the Lord tells us to reach out to others and especially to those who can not pay you back. The Lord Himself will make sure that your life is watered if you water others.

Proverbs 11:25 The generous man will be prosperous, And he who waters will himself be watered.

The Lord Himself was like this.

Philippians 2:3-5 Do nothing from selfishness or empty conceit, but with humility of mind regard one another as more important than yourselves; do not merely look out for your own personal interests, but also for the interests of others. Have this attitude in yourselves which was also in Christ Jesus,

If you are missing a layer then ask the Lord to provide and then seek out opportunities to meet people. This principle is seen in life with grandparents, parents and children. Also, Jesus looked to the Father and had the disciples, especially Peter, James and John as friends and reached out to the multitude.

An easy way to remember this is to call it the “oreo” principle. (If you like oreo cookies.) The top layer are those who love you in spite of your faults and the bottom layer are those who love you but do not see your faults. Then the sweet stuff in the middle are your friends who see the good, the bad and the ugly but who love you anyway and who will be there for you. Can it get any better? How is your “oreo” principle?

A Life that is Wise

A life that is wise is spared much heartache and pain. A wise young lady does not have to learn from hindsight, which are her mistakes, but she has the foresight to avoid the pain that comes from mistakes. People are not better people because of the mistakes that they made but they are better people because of the knowledge that they learned from their mistakes. How much better it is to learn the knowledge beforehand so that we do not have the baggage of painful and broken relationships or habits and patterns that are difficult to change. Wisdom is having the knowledge to get the desired result. Prudence is the wisdom of how to avoid undesirable results. Wisdom and prudence go hand and hand.

Proverbs 16:16 How much better it is to get wisdom than gold!

Proverbs 8:12 I, wisdom, dwell with prudence.

No amount of money can heal a broken heart. Wisdom keeps a life of regrets from characterizing your life.