Author: instructionstoayounglife.com

When I was younger I read in the Bible that the Lord came to give me an abundant life and also that if I would trust Him then I would never be disappointed. These were incredible promises and so I decided to see if they were true. That was almost fifty years ago. What I have written are the truths that the Lord has taught me through His Word and I found them to be true every time. The Bible is the lecture and life is the lab. If a truth does not hold up in the lab then it can not be counted on. Every one was true and I have sought to build my life on these truths. We have a family business and four adult children. I wish that I could give my life to everyone but since I can't, I can share the truths that kept me from needless stress and pain. My marriage is the closest thing to heaven on earth. We are more "in love" than ever before and our children bring us great joy. I realize that not everyone will agree with everything that is written. I did not always agree either until I put it to the test. The Bible says that "wisdom will be vindicated by her deeds". The fruit from these truths have been sweet for me. May you be richly blessed as I have been. If you are struggling with life or with finding and keeping love in your life then please consider reading these posts. They have been tested and are true. If you are not happy and satisfied with life or what you have been doing has not been "working" then please consider what is written in these blogs. https://www.instructionstoayounglife.com is about how to live a life full of meaning, purpose, happiness with peace, quietness and confidence. https://www.howtofindandkeeplove.com is about the greatest love story in history. If you are looking for love and wanting to keep love in your life then please read this blog. These truths and this same love is offered to any who are willing to listen and learn. https://www.adviceforwomenaboutmen.com or https://www.adviceforgirlsaboutboys.com is practical advice on how a girl is to relate to a young man and how a woman is to relate to a man. It is a blog on how to keep from getting hurt and how to have a great love life. If you have any questions then please email me at fafeja@yahoo.com

A Life with Love is a Gift

Love is not elusive nor is it a fantasy but love is a gift. Love is a gift that God gives to mankind from Him and it is the most pleasant and desirable of all God’s gifts.

Love is patient, love is kind and is not jealous; love does not brag and is not arrogant, does not act unbecomingly; it does not seek its own, is not provoked, does not take into account a wrong suffered, does not rejoice in unrighteousness, but rejoices with the truth; bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Love never fails; I Corinthians 13:5-8a

Love enters the heart and changes a person from the inside to the outside. When someone knows that they are loved then they are secure and satisfied. Love takes away fears, humiliation, shame, rejection, anxieties and every other negative thing that destroys us. Love can not be bought and there is not anything anyone can do to work for love. Love is a gift from the giver. Love must be received as a gift.

But now faith, hope, love, abide these three; but the greatest of these is love. I Corinthians 13:13

Faith will one day be done away with because it won’t be necessary. Hope will one day be fulfilled. Love will never end. Love is eternal and those who have love will live eternally. God is love and when a person becomes a Christian then God comes to live in them and when He comes into their life then love comes into their heart.

The one who does not love does not know God, for God is love. I John 4:8

God is love and God created man to be loved. Man turned his back on God’s love and chose to go his own way. God’s love did not change and He sent Jesus Christ, His only begotten Son into the world to show mankind His great love.

By this the love of God was manifested in us, that God has sent His only begotten Son into the world so that we might live through Him. I John 4:9

Jesus Christ lived a perfect life, died for our sins and rose again. He is coming again for those who love Him, so that they might be with Him forever. He will love them forever and they will live forever in His love. The gift of God’s love comes through receiving Jesus Christ as Lord and Savior.

For I am convinced that neither death, nor life, nor angels, nor principalities, nor things present, nor things to come, nor powers, nor height, nor depth, nor any other created thing, will be able to separate us from the love of God, which is in Christ Jesus our Lord. Romans 8:38,39

There is nothing that can separate us from God’s love once we have received it. God’s love is forever. When we receive Jesus Christ then He releases us from our sins.

and from Jesus Christ, the faithful witness, the firstborn of the dead, and the ruler of the kings of the earth. To Him who loves us and released us from our sins by His blood— Revelation 1:5

This gift is offered to all and any who will come to Jesus Christ can receive God’s gift of love. Jesus Christ will never leave the one who comes to Him and receives Him. When we receive Jesus Christ then we receive God’s love and we come into His kingdom.

For He rescued us from the domain of darkness, and transferred us to the kingdom of His beloved Son, in whom we have redemption, the forgiveness of sins. Colossians 1:13,14

When we turn from ourselves to God to follow Him then He transfers us from the kingdom of darkness to the kingdom of His beloved Son, Jesus Christ, in whom we receive forgiveness of all of our sins.

that if you confess with your mouth Jesus as Lord, and believe in your heart that God raised Him from the dead, you will be saved; for with the heart a person believes, resulting in righteousness, and with the mouth he confesses, resulting in salvation. For the Scripture says, “Whoever believes in Him will not be disappointed.” For there is no distinction between Jew and Greek; for the same Lord is Lord of all, abounding in riches for all who call on Him; for “Whoever will call on the name of the Lord will be saved.” Romans 10:9-13

When we receive Jesus Christ then we also receive God’s gift of love. When Jesus Christ comes into our life then God loves us with the same love with which He loves Jesus. This is an amazing fact. We, who are sinners, and Jesus Christ who never sinned are loved with the same love.

so that the world may know that You sent Me, and loved them, even as You have loved Me. John 17:23b

Do you feel loved? Do you know that there is One who loves you? Have you received the gift of love? His love for you will never leave nor will His love ever fail.

for He Himself has said, “I will never desert you, nor will I ever forsake you,” Hebrews 13:5b

A Life that is Comforted

One of the blessings of being a child of God is that we are never without comfort. He is a God and Father of comfort who comforts His children in whatever struggle we have.

II Corinthians 1:3 Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies and God of all comfort,

He comforts us so that we also may be able to comfort others when they have the same or similar struggles.

II Corinthians 1:4 who comforts us in all our affliction so that we will be able to comfort those who are in any affliction with the comfort with which we ourselves are comforted by God.

The Lord comforts us when we are depressed. Depression is an affliction. The Lord comforts us in our afflictions.

II Corinthians 7:6 But God, who comforts the depressed,

The Lord comforts us through His Word and His Holy Spirit. Go to Him in your pain. He has not left you alone. He said that He would not leave us without comfort. The word orphan literally means “comfortless”. He said He would not leave us as orphans but He would send the Holy Spirit to comfort us.

John 14:16-18 I will ask the Father, and He will give you another Helper, that He may be with you forever; that is the Spirit of truth, whom the world cannot receive, because it does not see Him or know Him, but you know Him because He abides with you and will be in you. “I will not leave you as orphans; I will come to you.

The Lord unites us through our struggles and through our comfort, that we might be one in Him. We need each other.

II Corinthians 1:6,7 But if we are afflicted, it is for your comfort and salvation; or if we are comforted, it is for your comfort, which is effective in the patient enduring of the same sufferings which we also suffer; and our hope for you is firmly grounded, knowing that as you are sharers of our sufferings, so also you are sharers of our comfort.

Is there anyone in your life who needs comfort? We are the body of Christ. We are His heart, His hands and His feet. The Lord has allowed you to go through suffering so that you might bring comfort to others in the same affliction. When we suffer we become aware of the suffering of others. Someone else will be comforted through your love and refreshed through you.

Philemon 1:7 For I have come to have much joy and comfort in your love, because the hearts of the saints have been refreshed through you, brother.

We are comforted through the faith in the Lord of our brothers and sisters in Christ. The Lord is using you and you are not always aware of it. Keep standing firm in Him.

I Thessalonians 3:7 for this reason, brethren, in all our distress and affliction we were comforted about you through your faith;

When you spend time with Him and walk with Him then you know His love and experience His comfort. You also receive hope through His grace and are strengthened for every good work and word that He has called you to do.

II Thessalonians 2:16,17 Now may our Lord Jesus Christ Himself and God our Father, who has loved us and given us eternal comfort and good hope by grace, comfort and strengthen your hearts in every good work and word.

A Life with Love Lives By Faith

Abraham chose to believe in God and God chose Abraham to bless Him.

Now the Lord said to Abram,

“Go forth from your country,
And from your relatives
And from your father’s house,
To the land which I will show you;
And I will make you a great nation,
And I will bless you,
And make your name great;
And so you shall be a blessing;
And I will bless those who bless you,
And the one who curses you I will curse.
And in you all the families of the earth will be blessed.” Genesis 12:1-3

When Abraham chose to believe in God then he merely responded to the knowledge of God that the Lord puts within each one of us.

For the wrath of God is revealed from heaven against all ungodliness and unrighteousness of men who suppress the truth in unrighteousness, because that which is known about God is evident within them; for God made it evident to them. For since the creation of the world His invisible attributes, His eternal power and divine nature, have been clearly seen, being understood through what has been made, so that they are without excuse. For even though they knew God, they did not honor Him as God or give thanks, but they became futile in their speculations, and their foolish heart was darkened. Professing to be wise, they became fools, Romans 1:18-22

God is love and He loves all of mankind. Love is God’s plan. Adam and Eve suppressed the truth and that same sin has continued to this day. God’s wrath is against all of the ungodliness and unrighteousness of man that has come about from suppressing the truth about God. Man for some reason does not want to believe that God loves him. Believing God is faith. Faith is not just believing there is a God but faith is coming to Him since He is God and believing His love and putting your trust in Him. Abraham did not just believe that there is a God but he lived according to that faith. His faith was not just an intellectual faith, his faith dictated his actions.

You believe that God is one. You do well; the demons also believe, and shudder. But are you willing to recognize, you foolish fellow, that faith without works is useless? Was not Abraham our father justified by works when he offered up Isaac his son on the altar? You see that faith was working with his works, and as a result of the works, faith was perfected; and the Scripture was fulfilled which says, “And Abraham believed God, and it was reckoned to him as righteousness,” and he was called the friend of God. James 2:19-23

Abraham was called God’s friend because he believed in God. His father was an idol worshiper and suppressed the truth of God. Abraham chose to walk by faith and not by sight and God blessed him. The Lord is still blessing all who do not suppress the truth but respond to the knowledge of God and live by faith.

And without faith it is impossible to please Him, for he who comes to God must believe that He is and that He is a rewarder of those who seek Him. Hebrews 11:6

The Lord rewarded Abraham when he stepped out in faith and obedience and left his country and his relatives. The Lord made him a great nation and made his name great. The Lord blessed him and made him a blessing. The Lord is still looking for those who will trust Him with all of their heart so that He can pour out His love on them.

For the eyes of the Lord move to and fro throughout the earth that He may strongly support those whose heart is completely His. You have acted foolishly in this. Indeed, from now on you will surely have wars. II Chronicles 16:9

The Bible says that a fool lives as if there is no God. A fool is wise in his own eyes but a fool has suppressed the truth and missed out on experiencing God’s love and goodness, on knowing God, on being blessed, on being a blessing, on peace in this life and everything good in the life to come. The fool has exchanged the truth of God for a lie and has chosen his own idols, which can never satisfy him or give him the peace and security that he longs for. His idols can not bless him nor love him. When a man acts foolishly and does not believe in God then he brings conflict upon himself. He will surely have wars within and without, in his marriage and in his home and in his nation.

But the wicked are like the tossing sea,
For it cannot be quiet,
And its waters toss up refuse and mud.
“There is no peace,” says my God, “for the wicked.” Isaiah 57:20,21

The Lord first gives us the faith to believe in Him and then He lets us see and know His love and He gives us peace on the inside.

Peace I leave with you; My peace I give to you; not as the world gives do I give to you. Do not let your heart be troubled, nor let it be fearful. John 14:27

Is your heart fearful about anything? By faith come to Him. He will take your fears and He will give you His comfort and love. He loves you.

There is no fear in love; but perfect love casts out fear, I John 4:18a

Are you worried or anxious or is your heart troubled about anything? By faith come to Him. He will take your fears and give you His peace. He cares for you.

casting all your anxiety on Him, because He cares for you. I Peter 5:7

A Life of Discipline

Most people feel the need for more discipline in their lives but fewer people are willing to discipline themselves. Discipline is the training that forms our character. A good parent will discipline their children with the ultimate goal of the child having self discipline. The Lord does not punish His children but He disciplines His children. In fact, He says that if you are without discipline then you are not a child.

Hebrews 12:8 But if you are without discipline, of which all have become partakers, then you are illegitimate children and not sons.

The Lord disciplines us for our good, that we might become more like Him.

Hebrews 12:10 For they disciplined us for a short time as seemed best to them, but He disciplines us for our good, so that we may share His holiness.

The Lord tells us not to regard lightly His discipline or faint when He reproves us.

Hebrews 12:5 and you have forgotten the exhortation which is addressed to you as sons, “My son, do not regard lightly the discipline of the Lord, Nor faint when you are reproved by Him;

He disciplines us because He loves us. Just as a parent takes special care to train and discipline the child whom they love.

Hebrews 12:6 For those whom the Lord loves He disciplines, And He scourges every son whom He receives.”

Discipline produces in us endurance so that we will be faithful to the end. Thank the Lord for the discipline that He gives you.

Hebrews 12:7 It is for discipline that you endure; God deals with you as with sons; for what son is there whom his father does not discipline?

However, discipline is painful. Just as some children need more discipline than other children, in the same way, if we learn to obey and do what is right then we will receive less discipline from the Lord.

Hebrews 12:11 All discipline for the moment seems not to be joyful, but sorrowful; yet to those who have been trained by it, afterwards it yields the peaceful fruit of righteousness.

The Lord exhorts us in His Word to discipline ourselves for the purpose of godliness. The word disciple comes from the word discipline. We are to have discipline in our lives so that we will do what is right. The outcome of a disciplined life is peace.

I Timothy 4:7,8 …On the other hand, discipline yourself for the purpose of godliness; for bodily discipline is only of little profit, but godliness is profitable for all things, since it holds promise for the present life and also for the life to come.

Since discipline can be painful and it is very necessary in life. How much better it is to discipline yourself to obey the Lord and to do what is right than to be disciplined by Him, to keep you from further sorrow and shame. He has given us everything that we need to live a disciplined life.

II Timothy 1:7 For God has not given us a spirit of timidity, but of power and love and discipline.

Is there anything in your life that you need to change or that you have been slack in? Turn to Him with all of your heart. He loves you and wants you to become like Him. He wants you to know and experience the peaceful fruit of righteousness.

Revelation 3:19 Those whom I love, I reprove and discipline; therefore be zealous and repent.

Be zealous and repent so that you will not experience His discipline.

A Life with Love Unites

The Lord said in His Word that love is the perfect bond of unity. There will be no unity without love.

Beyond all these things put on love, which is the perfect bond of unity. Colossians 3:14

There will be no peace without unity and very little will be accomplished without unity.

being diligent to preserve the unity of the Spirit in the bond of peace. Ephesians 4:3

Unity must be preserved just as love must be preserved. You can not have one without the other. Love and unity can be lost and when a group of any people is divided against itself then it will fall.

If a house is divided against itself, that house will not be able to stand. Mark 3:25

Many people want to live life without God. However, God is love and without God there will be no love or unity or peace. When God is removed from a marriage, home, community, city or nation then there will be fighting, stress, constant struggle, arguing, bitter jealousy and selfish ambition. The people will bite and devour one another and ultimately end up destroying each other. Only a fool lives as if there is no god.

But if you bite and devour one another, take care that you are not consumed by one another. Galatians 5:15

The Lord has called us to love and to be at peace with one another. It is only possible through God. Jesus Christ came to set us free. Freedom begins on the inside when Jesus Christ sets us free from the things within that enslave us, whether it is bad thoughts, a bad feeling or attitude or bad habits and actions. There is not freedom on the outside if there is not freedom on the inside. We are controlled from within and unless we are controlled by what is good then we gravitate towards what is bad.

For you were called to freedom, brethren; only do not turn your freedom into an opportunity for the flesh, but through love serve one another. Galatians 5:13

It is only when God controls us through His Spirit that we can love one another. It is our flesh that is selfish and destroys us. When a person gives their life to the Lord then He gives them His Spirit. Love comes and lives within them and love starts to live through them.

But I say, walk by the Spirit, and you will not carry out the desire of the flesh. For the flesh sets its desire against the Spirit, and the Spirit against the flesh; for these are in opposition to one another, Galatians 5:16,17a

We are our own enemy when we allow the flesh to control us. It is our flesh that enslaves us. It is our flesh that destroys us, our marriages, our families, our cities and our nations. God’s Spirit is greater than our flesh and when God’s Spirit controls us then we do what is right. When people do what is right then we will love one another. We will help one another. We will be strong and there will be peace, quietness and confidence. Our strength must come from God and God must be our strength.

How blessed is the man whose strength is in You, Psalm 84:5a

Blessed means happy. Blessed are the people whose God is the Lord Jesus Christ. Blessed are the marriages where love abounds. Blessed are the children in whose homes God is honored. Blessed is the nation that trusts in the Lord and really mean that in God they trust. Blessed are the communities, cities and lands where God’s name is remembered. He will come and bless those who honor Jesus Christ, the only true Lord God and Savior.

in every place where I cause My name to be remembered, I will come to you and bless you. Exodus 20:24b

A Life that is Prosperous

Three times in the Bible the Lord says that if you will do a certain thing then your life will be prosperous. This is a promise with a condition but it is well worth the work. However, unless your heart wants to do it then you will not be able to persevere. You must want to please the Lord in all that you do. This activity helps you learn to do what pleases Him.

Joshua 1:8 This book of the law shall not depart from your mouth, but you shall meditate on it day and night, so that you may be careful to do according to all that is written in it; for then you will make your way prosperous, and then you will have success.

You must humble yourself before the Lord and ask Him how you can learn His ways. He says that He teaches the humble His way. God’s Word teaches us His way but His Spirit is what gives us the understanding.

Psalm 25:9 He leads the humble in justice, And He teaches the humble His way.

Again, the Lord says in Scripture, if you will meditate on God’s Word and delight in His Word then the Lord says that in whatever you do you will be prosperous.

Psalm 1:2,3 But his delight is in the law of the Lord,
And in His law he meditates day and night.
He will be like a tree firmly planted by streams of water,
Which yields its fruit in its season
And its leaf does not wither;
And in whatever he does, he prospers.

Again, in the New Testament, the Lord mentions again this activity of looking intently at the Word of God and doing what it says.

James 1:25 But one who looks intently at the perfect law, the law of liberty, and abides by it, not having become a forgetful hearer but an effectual doer, this man will be blessed in what he does.

Do you feel God’s blessing in your life? Do you need His blessing? If you have never done this then why don’t you ask the Lord to help you? What is it that the Lord wants you to do? He wants you to learn to meditate on His Word and live by what He says in His Word. Meditation is putting God’s Word in your heart and thinking about what it means and how it applies to your life.

Psalm 119:48 And I shall lift up my hands to Your commandments, Which I love; And I will meditate on Your statutes.

Go to a Christian who puts God’s Word in their heart and seeks to live by it and ask them to help you. It is a great reward and a great promise because the Lord wants you to spend time with Him and delight in Him. It is through His Word that He speaks to His children. He wants to communicate with you and wants you to fellowship with Him.

A Life with Love Believes the Truth

When it comes to many areas in life there are many people who have no problem with accepting the truth. Most people understand that if you eat lots of carbs and don’t exercise then you will gain weight. Most people understand that you can not spend your money recklessly and still be able to pay your bills. Most students understand if they want to stay in school then they must study. However, when it comes to love, many people think that they can have it all. They want to be able to do what they want to do but they still want their partner to be faithful. They want to marry someone who has not slept around but they want to be able to do what they want to do. They want love and respect and they want their lusts and desires also. However, just like the rest of life, it does not work that way. You reap what you sow.

Do not be deceived, God is not mocked; for whatever a man sows, this he will also reap. Galatians 6:7

Many people do not want to “live under God’s laws” but they want everyone else to. They want their “freedom” but they do not want someone else to murder them, steal from them or lie to them. The Lord did not give those laws for His sake but for our sake so that we might live in peace with one another. He does not want to “control” us but He wants us to live in harmony and love one another. He does not need us but we need Him. For this reason, the Bible calls a person a fool when they live as if there is no god. In the same way, the Lord gave us laws of truth that will set us free when we live by them. Life and marriage is good to those who will believe what God says and live by His truths. He teaches us to love one another. It is wonderful to be in love and stay in love with the same person throughout your mature years. It is wonderful to not worry about sexually transmitted diseases or the many diseases that come from having more than one partner. Most cervical cancers in women are because they had more than one partner. It is wonderful to not worry if your child will be born blind because you had more than one intimate partner. The Lord made these “rules” or “laws” or “truths” for our sake.

But it shall come about, if you do not obey the Lord your God, to observe to do all His commandments and His statutes with which I charge you today, that all these curses will come upon you and overtake you: “The Lord will send upon you curses, confusion, and rebuke, in all you undertake to do, until you are destroyed and until you perish quickly, on account of the evil of your deeds, because you have forsaken Me. The Lord will make the pestilence cling to you until He has consumed you from the land where you are entering to possess it. The Lord will smite you with consumption and with fever and with inflammation and with fiery heat and with the sword and with blight and with mildew, and they will pursue you until you perish…The Lord will smite you with the boils of Egypt and with tumors and with the scab and with the itch, from which you cannot be healed. The Lord will smite you with madness and with blindness and with bewilderment of heart; You shall betroth a wife, but another man will violate her; Deuteronomy 28:15, 20-23, 27-28, 30a

All these are curses that we bring upon ourselves when we try to do life and love our way and try to “have it all”. Life and love are not any different from everything else. To have one thing then you must give up another.

Now it shall be, if you diligently obey the Lord your God, being careful to do all His commandments which I command you today, the Lord your God will set you high above all the nations of the earth. All these blessings will come upon you and overtake you if you obey the Lord your God…The Lord will make you abound in prosperity, in the offspring of your body and in the offspring of your beast and in the produce of your ground, in the land which the Lord swore to your fathers to give you. The Lord will open for you His good storehouse, the heavens, to give rain to your land in its season and to bless all the work of your hand; and you shall lend to many nations, but you shall not borrow. The Lord will make you the head and not the tail, and you only will be above, and you will not be underneath, if you listen to the commandments of the Lord your God, which I charge you today, to observe them carefully, and do not turn aside from any of the words which I command you today, to the right or to the left, to go after other gods to serve them. Deuteronomy 28:1-2,11-14

No one can make you eat healthy or spend less money to keep you healthy and your life in order. No one can make anyone study to stay in school. How easy it is to see the lives of other people. Why is there so much pain from relationships? Why do so many people who begin with love end up hating one another? Pain comes when the truth is ignored. It is the truth that if you will obey the commands and instructions of the Lord, which He gave to us for our good, then you will be blessed. Your life will be blessed and your marriage will be blessed. Your children will be blessed and all that you do will be blessed. Love and belief are choices. We can choose to believe and love God and we will be blessed or we can choose to go our own way. God is good and He is loving. He made a provision for us to know Him and follow Him through Jesus Christ. He made a way for us and His way is good. If you want a good life and a good marriage then He offers it to you through following Him. Obedience comes before understanding. After you obey then you will understand.

A Life with Love Gives Significance

Only someone greater can bless and give significance to someone else.

Now the Lord said to Abram,

God is greater than all and He is the One who gave Abraham his purpose and meaning in life and He is the One who gives all men and women and children their significance of who they are. He is the Creator and we are His creation. He made us in His image and made us and has given our lives meaning and purpose. When we are restored to a relationship with Him then we will find the meaning and purpose for our lives. He so loved us that He sent His Son to bring us back to Himself.

For Christ also died for sins once for all, the just for the unjust, so that He might bring us to God, I Peter 3:18a

We could not find our way to God so He provided a way for us. When we come to Him then He restores us to a relationship with Him and we become His child.

But as many as received Him, to them He gave the right to become children of God, even to those who believe in His name, John 1:12

We become His child by becoming born again into His family.

Jesus answered, “Truly, truly, I say to you, unless one is born of water and the Spirit he cannot enter into the kingdom of God. That which is born of the flesh is flesh, and that which is born of the Spirit is spirit. Do not be amazed that I said to you, ‘You must be born again.’ John 3:5-7

When we are born again into His family then we have an inheritance.

but you have received a spirit of adoption as sons by which we cry out, “Abba! Father!” The Spirit Himself testifies with our spirit that we are children of God, and if children, heirs also, heirs of God and fellow heirs with Christ, if indeed we suffer with Him so that we may also be glorified with Him. Romans 8:15b-17

The word “Abba” is the same as the affectionate name “Daddy”. We can call God, who becomes our heavenly Father, once we come to know Him, then we can call Him “Daddy”. It is an intimate relationship with God that the Lord brings us into when we come to know Him. We also receive eternal life, which begins the moment we come to know Him. Eternal life is not just living forever but it is knowing God.

This is eternal life, that they may know You, the only true God, and Jesus Christ whom You have sent. John 17:3

Also, when we come to know Him and become His child and become an heir then we also inherit a blessing.

for you were called for the very purpose that you might inherit a blessing. I Peter 3:9b

The Lord gives us meaning and purpose in life when we give our lives to Him. His design is that we would be a blessing to the world. God blesses people so that they might be a blessing. God gives us love so that we might give love to others. God gives us forgiveness so that we might forgive others. The Lord blessed Abraham so that he might be a blessing. The Lord said that through Abraham all of the families of the earth would be blessed because it was through Abraham that Jesus Christ, the Messiah, came into the world.

For when God made the promise to Abraham, since He could swear by no one greater, He swore by Himself, saying, “I will surely bless you and I will surely multiply you.” And so, having patiently waited, he obtained the promise. For men swear by one greater than themselves, and with them an oath given as confirmation is an end of every dispute. In the same way God, desiring even more to show to the heirs of the promise the unchangeableness of His purpose, interposed with an oath, so that by two unchangeable things in which it is impossible for God to lie, we who have taken refuge would have strong encouragement to take hold of the hope set before us. Hebrews 6:13-18

Jesus Christ is the hope of all who have put their trust in Him. We live by faith and wait patiently for Him. Jesus Christ gives meaning and purpose to life. God is love and His love is expressed through Jesus Christ to the world. When Christ lives in a person then they have significance and then they can truly love others because they do not need to get their significance from someone else. Jesus Christ validates them and gives their life meaning. A person is free when they know Christ because they do not need to look to someone else for meaning, purpose, love, validation, significance or any of the other needs that are deep within us. Jesus Christ sets a person free and they are able to love, to forgive and to bless others.

It was for freedom that Christ set us free; Galatians 5:1a

You can never truly love until you are loved. God loves you and has offered you a gift of a great love, and that is to become His child.

See how great a love the Father has bestowed on us, that we would be called children of God; and such we are. I John 3:1

A Life with Love Involves the Will

Our soul is made up of our mind, will and emotions. Man is made up of spirit, soul and body. The decisions that we make in life are expressed through our body but made through our soul. Every decision that we make involves our soul and affects our soul. Love is an expression of the soul. We choose to love with our mind and our will and it affects our emotions. We choose to hate with our mind and our will and it also affects our emotions. We choose to believe with our mind and our will and it affects our destiny. Loving and believing are a choice of the mind and will. When we respond to God’s love and believe in Jesus Christ, God’s Son, then our spirit becomes alive. It is in our spirit that we worship and communicate with God. It is with our soul that we communicate with each other. It is with our spirit, soul and body that we love God and love another.

Now may the God of peace Himself sanctify you entirely; and may your spirit and soul and body be preserved complete, without blame at the coming of our Lord Jesus Christ. I Thessalonians 5:23

When we love God and love another as God has called us to do then our spirit, soul and body are preserved. When we sin against God and each other then we bring destruction to ourselves. Our spirit is made complete in Christ at the time of our conversion, if we are a Christian. Our soul is being made complete through our obedience to the Lord. Our soul experiences life when we do what is right. Our soul experiences death when we do what is wrong. The death to our soul is the sick feeling we have when the guilt comes and all the other feelings of regret. Guilt brings torment to the soul.

Therefore, putting aside all filthiness and all that remains of wickedness, in humility receive the word implanted, which is able to save your souls. James 1:21

God’s Word can be implanted in our soul and saves our soul. God’s Word gives life to our soul. Just as someone who receives a heart transplant because his heart is not functioning right, so we need to receive God’s Word implanted because our thoughts are not right. We have been corrupted in our mind, will and emotions. When we receive God’s Word into our soul then it transforms our mind, will and emotions so that we will know what is right. Our mind will tell us the right thing to do and our will carries it out. The happiness we experience in our emotions is because we did what was right.

“You have loved righteousness and hated lawlessness;
Therefore God, Your God, has anointed You
With the oil of gladness above Your companions.” Hebrews 1:9

Sin is lawlessness and when we sin then we experience death to the soul.

Everyone who practices sin also practices lawlessness; and sin is lawlessness. I John 3:4

Everyone does just what he wants to do. If a man loves a woman then he will show love to her. Many women try to make excuses for a man when he does not call, come see her, etc. but it is because he does not want to. There are always exceptions when something urgent does come up, but love will always want to make up what was missed. In the same way, many people try to make excuses for themselves about why they do not believe in God and/or do what He wants them to do, but the bottom line is that they do not want to believe in God. They do not want to do what He says. Belief and love are a matter of the will. A person does just what they want to do.

And this commandment we have from Him, that the one who loves God should love his brother also. I John 4:21

The Lord would not have commanded us to do something that we could not do. Every marriage that fails is because someone gave up in their mind and will to love their spouse. Everyone messes up. Love is covering another’s mess. Shame is making it known. We cover up messes with our will and we make messes known with our will. Love is not always easy but it is worth it. When you are committed to loving another then it is only a matter of time before you will make a mess and you will be thankful that the other chose to love you.

Where no oxen are, the manger is clean, But much revenue comes by the strength of the ox. Proverbs 14:4

When you are single and live alone then there are not many messes but there is no love. When a married couple have no children then their home is clean. However, there is great joy being in a loving marriage and there also is great fulfillment in having children. Many messes come in relationships but much happiness comes when life is done right.

A Life with Love Must Be a Wise Choice

One of the most misunderstood aspects of love is that many think that love is a feeling. Love is a choice of the mind and will and the emotions and feelings will follow. The soul is made up of the mind, will and emotions and is what allows you to enjoy all of the gifts that God, in His love, gives to mankind. One of His most precious gifts is a lover, friend, companion and soulmate whom you can go through life with and share in the joy of life. Love is a commitment and should be entered into with your mind and your will and if possible, very little emotion. When you make a major decision in life, such as, where you want to live, or go to school, or what career you want to pursue, then you use your mind. With your mind you try to make the choice objectively so that you can see clearly. How much greater is the decision as to whom you will marry and share life.

If it is disagreeable in your sight to serve the Lord, choose for yourselves today whom you will serve: whether the gods which your fathers served which were beyond the River, or the gods of the Amorites in whose land you are living; but as for me and my house, we will serve the Lord.” Joshua 24:15

The most important qualification for a marriage partner is who the other person chooses to serve. If you are a Christian and they are not then you will be miserable and they will be unhappy also because you all will not be of the same mind. They will have their god ad you will want to love the Lord God. You will not be able to share your greatest joys with the person who serves a different god. Who you serve is who you will love. Love is a choice in the God whom you choose to follow and worship. Whoever or whatever is your god will be the center of your life. If a person is self centered then they want to be their own god. If money is a person’s god then that will be the motivational factor in their life. If the Lord Jesus Christ is your God then you will want to please Him. No one can serve two masters and a marriage and home can not serve two masters. You will hate his god and he will hate your god if you both do not have to same Master in life.

No one can serve two masters; for either he will hate the one and love the other, or he will be devoted to one and despise the other. You cannot serve God and wealth. Matthew 6:24

You and your spouse must be of the same mind, otherwise there will not be unity. If you both are on the same page with the same mind then there will be little disagreement when it comes to decisions, and especially major decisions.

Now I exhort you, brethren, by the name of our Lord Jesus Christ, that you all agree and that there be no divisions among you, but that you be made complete in the same mind and in the same judgment. I Corinthians 1:10

You both will want to have the same purpose in life, which means that you will be going in the same direction overall. Everything that you do will be towards the same goal. When you have the same purpose in life then each one of you will help the other achieve their unique calling and purpose in life and you both will complement each other rather than hinder one another. Each victory will be both of your victories and each sorrow will be shared. You will not cry alone.

make my joy complete by being of the same mind, maintaining the same love, united in spirit, intent on one purpose. Philippians 2:2

The more united that two married people are then the more each individual will achieve their full potential in life. The happier each one will be, will be directly proportional to the sameness in mind, the uniting of love and the oneness of purpose. However, all of this is only possible if both in the marriage are of one spirit. Two people can only be of one spirit if they are spiritually alive. Only Jesus Christ can make a person spiritually alive. When two people become spiritually alive then they have the capacity to be of one soul with each other. It is during the pre-marriage phase of a friendship that two people discover whether they are meant for one another. You must see the other person objectively for each of your own benefit.

Do not be bound together with unbelievers; for what partnership have righteousness and lawlessness, or what fellowship has light with darkness? Or what harmony has Christ with Belial, or what has a believer in common with an unbeliever? II Corinthians 6:14,15

Marriage is one of the greatest joys when it is done God’s way. The sexual intimacy is reserved for marriage and the only way that you will know if God brings you together is when you come to the altar to say your vows to God. He brings two people together and joins them. If you enter into physical intimacy before marriage then you will not see clearly if this person is the one. You are only robbing yourself of another one of God’s gifts and you are also blinding your own eyes to what you need to see in the other person. Once two people become physically intimate then they can no longer see objectively.

So they are no longer two, but one flesh. What therefore God has joined together, let no man separate.” Matthew 19:6

Marriage protects the love. The vows are made to keep us faithful to our spouse. The vows are made to God and vows made to God can not be broken. They must be kept. If they are kept then both of you will be blessed and both of you will grow in the love of the Lord. Life and marriage were made to be sweet and they can be, but only, if you follow the instructions of the One who is the Author of life and the Giver of good gifts.