truth – Page 2 – Instructions To A Young Life

A Life that Does Not Give Away Intimacy

There is a saying, “If the milk is free why buy the cow?”. There are certain gifts that have been given to us and that a young lady should not give away except to the right person at the right time. She should not give away her body to men but it is to be saved for her husband alone and only should be given to him after he has taken her in marriage. Marriage is a man’s commitment to a young lady to love her, to cherish her, to protect her, to provide for her and ultimately to lay down his life for her. Many a man will make promises to get what they want and then once they have gotten their desires then they never fulfill their promises. Engagement is not marriage and the same rules for dating apply during the engagement period.

I Corinthians 6:18-20 Flee immorality. Every other sin that a man commits is outside the body, but the immoral man sins against his own body. Or do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit who is in you, whom you have from God, and that you are not your own? For you have been bought with a price: therefore glorify God in your body.

Marriage is not a 50/50 proposition but it is a 100/100 relationship. Each one gives all of oneself to the other so that they might become one. However, what is right before marriage is wrong after marriage. It is right to abstain from sexual relations before marriage and wrong to withhold from each other after marriage. There is a saying that girls that do “it” before marriage don’t want to do “it” after marriage so it is foolish for both to compromise God’s standard of morality. God is not mocked. He has His standards for our good and we are foolish not to abide by what He has said.

Galatians 6:7,8 Do not be deceived, God is not mocked; for whatever a man sows, this he will also reap. For the one who sows to his own flesh will from the flesh reap corruption, but the one who sows to the Spirit will from the Spirit reap eternal life.

Moral excellence is the root of true love in a marriage and it is expressed through waiting until after the wedding to have a physical relationship. If two people are morally excellent in their standards then they will trust each other after they are married. If a man and woman compromise before marriage then the trust will not be there as it could have been had they waited.

II Peter 1:5-7 Now for this very reason also, applying all diligence, in your faith supply moral excellence, and in your moral excellence, knowledge, and in your knowledge, self-control, and in your self-control, perseverance, and in your perseverance, godliness, and in your godliness, brotherly kindness, and in your brotherly kindness, love.

If you have compromised God’s moral standard then it is not too late to repent but there needs to be repentance and though that may be hard it is necessary. Repentance means that you are turning your back on your sin and turning to God. However, you must keep turning to the Lord so that you do not fall back into your old ways. You also must flee from temptation. Temptations are often much stronger if you have tasted of the pleasures of that particular sin. You do not miss what you have never known.

II Timothy 2:22 Now flee from youthful lusts and pursue righteousness, faith, love and peace, with those who call on the Lord from a pure heart.

You can, by God’s grace, keep His standards of righteousness. God is faithful and will provide a way of escape to the one who calls on Him and puts their trust in Jesus Christ.

I Corinthians 10:13 No temptation has overtaken you but such as is common to man; and God is faithful, who will not allow you to be tempted beyond what you are able, but with the temptation will provide the way of escape also, so that you will be able to endure it.

A Life with The Few

The choice is yours whether to be with the few who choose to live right or the many who choose to live according to their fleshly desires. The only way that you can live right is to choose Jesus and if you don’t then you will sooner or later choose to make the wrong decisions. You will be deceived by your own desires.

Matthew 7:14 For the gate is small and the way is narrow that leads to life, and there are few who find it.

The Lord gives you the opportunity to choose Him now. He is knocking on the door of your heart.

Revelation 3:20 Behold, I stand at the door and knock; if anyone hears My voice and opens the door, I will come in to him and will dine with him, and he with Me.

If you do not choose to follow Jesus Christ now then the day will come when you will want to but it will be too late. You will knock but no one will answer.

Luke 13:22-28 And He was passing through from one city and village to another, teaching, and proceeding on His way to Jerusalem. And someone said to Him, “Lord, are there just a few who are being saved?” And He said to them, “Strive to enter through the narrow door; for many, I tell you, will seek to enter and will not be able. Once the head of the house gets up and shuts the door, and you begin to stand outside and knock on the door, saying, ‘Lord, open up to us!’ then He will answer and say to you, ‘I do not know where you are from.’ Then you will begin to say, ‘We ate and drank in Your presence, and You taught in our streets’; and He will say, ‘I tell you, I do not know where you are from; depart from Me, all you evildoers.’ In that place there will be weeping and gnashing of teeth when you see Abraham and Isaac and Jacob and all the prophets in the kingdom of God, but yourselves being thrown out.

There will be much weeping when you see others but you yourself will not enter into the kingdom of heaven.

Matthew 22:14 For many are called, but few are chosen.”

Many are called but only a few respond. Just as in the days of Noah, there was eating and drinking but no thought of tomorrow. It was seize the day and eat and drink.

I Peter 3:18-22 For Christ also died for sins once for all, the just for the unjust, so that He might bring us to God, having been put to death in the flesh, but made alive in the spirit; in which also He went and made proclamation to the spirits now in prison, who once were disobedient, when the patience of God kept waiting in the days of Noah, during the construction of the ark, in which a few, that is, eight persons, were brought safely through the water. Corresponding to that, baptism now saves you—not the removal of dirt from the flesh, but an appeal to God for a good conscience—through the resurrection of Jesus Christ, who is at the right hand of God, having gone into heaven, after angels and authorities and powers had been subjected to Him.

Many are seeking God but do not know the way to Him. This harvest of seekers is plentiful and He expects those who have received salvation to share the Gospel with others. The Gospel literally means “good news” and the goods news is that the Lord wants all to be saved.

Matthew 9:37 Then He said to His disciples, “The harvest is plentiful, but the workers are few.

He also wants His children to walk in a manner worthy of the calling with which we have been called.

I Thessalonians 2:12 so that you would walk in a manner worthy of the God who calls you into His own kingdom and glory.

The Lord has called us to be His bride and the bride is to adorn herself in white. Those who have been faithful to Him will be counted worthy to walk with Him.

Revelation 3:4 But you have a few people in Sardis who have not soiled their garments; and they will walk with Me in white, for they are worthy.

The Lord never said that it would be easy but He does say that it will be worth it. Where are you in your journey? Have you responded to His call to become one whom He has chosen to be His? If you have responded are you sharing the good news of the gospel? How are you doing in your walk with Him? Are you walking in a manner worthy of Him? It is not too late to respond to Him and surrender your life to Him. He will put you on His path and will help you walk with Him in a manner worthy of the great calling to be His bride. He loves you.

Revelation 19:7,8 Let us rejoice and be glad and give the glory to Him, for the marriage of the Lamb has come and His bride has made herself ready.” It was given to her to clothe herself in fine linen, bright and clean; for the fine linen is the righteous acts of the saints.

A Life with A Great Love

Love is the greatest of all gifts and without love a person will die. They first will die in their soul and then their body will die. We all need to be loved and we can not truly love others unless we ourselves are loved.

But now faith, hope, love, abide these three; but the greatest of these is love. I Corinthians 13:13

It is love that gives our lives significance and worth. The greater the love, the greater the worth and significance a person feels.

See how great a love the Father has bestowed on us, that we would be called children of God; and we are. I John 3:1a

The greater the cost of the love reveals the worth of the love.

For God so loved the world, that He gave His only begotten Son, that whoever believes in Him shall not perish, but have eternal life. John 3:16

Love must come from the one who loves for it to be unconditional love. Otherwise, it is a selfish love, that is a “I love you because…” of what you can do for me or what you can give to me. A selfish love is not really love because once the condition is gone then the love is no longer there.

…for God is love. I John 4:8b

The Lord is the only One who has perfect love. His love is unconditional. Unconditional love is not based on the object of the love but it flows from the one who loves. There is no other love as the love which God has for us. A new word had to be created when God came to earth through Jesus Christ. The love that God showed to the world is “agape” love. It is a love that was shown to mankind on the cross. It is a love that gave when the recipient did not deserve it. It is a love that can not be comprehended except through Jesus Christ.

But God demonstrates His own love toward us, in that while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us. Romans 5:8

The Father sent His only Begotten Son to die for us when we were helpless.

For while we were still helpless, at the right time Christ died for the ungodly. Romans 5:6

There was nothing that we could do to save ourselves. There was nothing that we could do to help ourselves from the judgment that each one of us deserves. There may be degrees of the expression of wrong that each of us does but each one of us has sinned against God in some way or form. The Lord made man upright but man, himself, has failed to live an upright life.

Behold, I have found only this, that God made men upright, but they have sought out many devices. Ecclesiastes 7:29

Everyone has messed up. As hard as anyone can try, he can never live up to perfection. He will always fail.

Indeed, there is not a righteous man on earth who does good and who never sins. Ecclesiastes 7:20

The Lord in His great love for us knows that man has failed and so He made a provision for man at His own expense. He paid for our failures with His own payment.

In this is love, not that we loved God, but that He loved us and sent His Son to be the propitiation for our sins. I John 4:10

Propitiation means that God satisfied the payment for our failures. It is a legal term meaning that He took care of the justice that was due to us. The judgment that was ours, He took on Himself and experienced the punishment that we deserved.

knowing that you were not redeemed with perishable things like silver or gold from your futile way of life inherited from your forefathers, but with precious blood, as of a lamb unblemished and spotless, the blood of Christ. I Peter 1:18,19

Jesus Christ paid for our sins through shedding His blood on the cross. He died for everyone. He died for each one of us so that each one of us could live forever. Death was never in God’s plan for mankind. Life was His plan and He made it possible through His death, through which He offers us the gift of life.

I came that they may have life, and have it abundantly. John 10:10b

Jesus Christ offers this gift of life to everyone. Each of us messed up and earned death but because of the great love of God, He offers the gift of life to everyone.

For the wages of sin is death, but the free gift of God is eternal life in Christ Jesus our Lord. Romans 6:23

Eternal life is a free gift. There is nothing we can do to deserve it. There is nothing we can do to pay for it. There is nothing we can do to earn it. However, we must receive it as a gift.

But as many as received Him, to them He gave the right to become children of God, even to those who believe in His name, John 1:12

The way that we receive this gift of eternal life is to pray and ask Him for it. We do this by calling on His name. When we confess the Lord Jesus Christ with our mouth and believe in our heart we will be saved.

that if you confess with your mouth Jesus as Lord, and believe in your heart that God raised Him from the dead, you will be saved; for with the heart a person believes, resulting in righteousness, and with the mouth he confesses, resulting in salvation. For the Scripture says, “Whoever believes in Him will not be disappointed.” For there is no distinction between Jew and Greek; for the same Lord is Lord of all, abounding in riches for all who call on Him; for “Whoever will call on the name of the Lord will be saved.” Romans 10:9-13

The Lord Jesus says that not only will we be saved and given eternal life and but He promises an abundant life and a life where we will not be disappointed. These are amazing promises that are offered to everyone but only experienced by those who receive Jesus Christ as their Lord and Savior. He must become our Lord for Him to become our Savior. When He becomes our Lord then He takes away our sin as “He is the Lamb of God who takes away the sin of the world”. Then He becomes our Savior then He saves us from our sins, for as it is written, “you shall call His name Jesus, for He will save His people from their sins”.

The next day he saw Jesus coming to him and said, “Behold, the Lamb of God who takes away the sin of the world! John 1:29

She will bear a Son; and you shall call His name Jesus, for He will save His people from their sins.” Matthew 1:21

See how great a love the Father has offered to us, that we should be His children and be called by His name. This is a love that can only be received. We can not fully understand it. However, when we receive this great love our lives are changed forever. We not only receive great worth and significance but we also receive the ability to trust Him. Once we trust Him with our life then we can trust Him with everything else. It is this love that gives us faith and hope. The faith to trust and the hope to believe in Him.

He who did not spare His own Son, but delivered Him over for us all, how will He not also with Him freely give us all things? Romans 8:32

For it is God’s great love that gives meaning to all things. Without Him we can do nothing.

Love never fails; I Corinthians 13:8a

But now faith, hope, love, abide these three; but the greatest of these is love. I Corinthians 13:13

A Life that Is Merciful

Everyone loves a merciful person and they not only do others good but they do themselves good when they are merciful.

Proverbs 11:17 The merciful man does himself good,
But the cruel man does himself harm.

The Lord says that the merciful person will receive mercy.

Matthew 5:7 Blessed are the merciful, for they shall receive mercy.

It was in God’s mercy that He redeemed us.

Isaiah 63:9 In all their affliction He was afflicted, And the angel of His presence saved them; In His love and in His mercy He redeemed them, And He lifted them and carried them all the days of old.

The merciful person is one who thinks of others and shows God’s love to others. When Jesus showed mercy to someone then those around glorified God saying that the Lord cared for them. When we show mercy to others then they feel as though the Lord has visited them and cares for them.

Luke 7:11-16 Soon afterwards He went to a city called Nain; and His disciples were going along with Him, accompanied by a large crowd. Now as He approached the gate of the city, a dead man was being carried out, the only son of his mother, and she was a widow; and a sizeable crowd from the city was with her. When the Lord saw her, He felt compassion for her, and said to her, “Do not weep.” And He came up and touched the coffin; and the bearers came to a halt. And He said, “Young man, I say to you, arise!”The dead man sat up and began to speak. And Jesus gave him back to his mother. Fear gripped them all, and they began glorifying God, saying, “A great prophet has arisen among us!” and, “God has visited His people!”

Compassion moves a person to act and then the recipient receives mercy and feels as though God has visited him. The word visited means “cares for”. He believes that God cares for him. When you are afflicted in any way there is no greater comfort than to feel that God has come to you and cares for you. We actually can be His ambassadors to the world by representing Him and showing mercy to others. When we show mercy to others then they can hear the truth of the Gospel.

Luke 6:36 Be merciful, just as your Father is merciful.

We want the Lord to be merciful to us and He has and He will again but He wants us in turn to show mercy to others. This is the characteristic of a Christian, that they are like their Father.

Hebrews 8:12 “For I will be merciful to their iniquities,
And I will remember their sins no more.”

If you belong to the Lord then He said that He is merciful to you and that He will remember your sins no more. Is there someone that you need to show mercy to and remember their sins no more, or are you still keeping an account? Love does not keep an account of sins of others.

I Corinthians 13:4,5 Love is patient, love is kind and is not jealous; love does not brag and is not arrogant, does not act unbecomingly; it does not seek its own, is not provoked, does not take into account a wrong suffered,

Forgiveness is the promise never to bring it up again. Have you shown mercy, as the Lord has shown you mercy, and forgiven from your heart?

Matthew 18:33-35 Should you not also have had mercy on your fellow slave, in the same way that I had mercy on you?’ And his lord, moved with anger, handed him over to the torturers until he should repay all that was owed him. My heavenly Father will also do the same to you, if each of you does not forgive his brother from your heart.”

You will be blessed if you show mercy for He Himself has said, “Blessed are the merciful for they shall receive mercy”.

A Life that Loves Much

Do you want to have a great love for God? Loving the Lord with all of your heart, soul and mind is the most exciting and fulfilling life on earth. To one who has never done it then they have no idea the thrill there is in being completely sold out to Him and for everything in your life to revolve around Him. It is the sweetest life imaginable and brings great contentment, satisfaction, security, peace, joy, love and many other great things that are too numerous to mention. Loving the Lord with all your heart, soul and mind truly is the great commandment.

Matthew 22:36-38 “Teacher, which is the great commandment in the Law?” And He said to him, “‘You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, and with all your soul, and with all your mind.’ This is the great and foremost commandment.

How can you get this incredible great love for the Lord and want to live it out daily in every area of your life? It can not be drummed up but must come from our relationship with Him. The first step is to realize how great a sinner you are. We have all sinned greatly against the Lord and we deserve the worst imaginable punishment. All of creation has fulfilled the purpose for which the Lord created them except for mankind. We have all rebelled against our Creator and gone our own way. We have turned our back on Him.

Luke 7:47 For this reason I say to you, her sins, which are many, have been forgiven, for she loved much; but he who is forgiven little, loves little.

How easy it is to compare ourselves to others and say to ourselves, “I am not that bad” for we see others who seem worse in our eyes. We are not much different than the man who went to the Lord and prayed that he would not be like others. We may not pray that prayer but we may say it in our hearts.

Luke 18:11,12 The Pharisee stood and was praying this to himself: ‘God, I thank You that I am not like other people: swindlers, unjust, adulterers, or even like this tax collector. I fast twice a week; I pay tithes of all that I get.’

Yes, it is much easier to keep an account of what we have done right and to keep an account of the sins of others. The Lord was not pleased with this man. However, the Lord heard the other man who came to pray, for this second man remembered his own sins and how unworthy he is to come before the Lord.

Luke 18:13,14 But the tax collector, standing some distance away, was even unwilling to lift up his eyes to heaven, but was beating his breast, saying, ‘God, be merciful to me, the sinner!’ I tell you, this man went to his house justified rather than the other; for everyone who exalts himself will be humbled, but he who humbles himself will be exalted.”

So, loving the Lord with all of our heart, soul and mind begins with the proper perspective of ourselves, that we are sinners of the worse degree and we are not worthy to even come into His presence.

John 14:23 Jesus answered and said to him, “If anyone loves Me, he will keep My word; and My Father will love him, and We will come to him and make Our abode with him.

If you want to love the Lord with all your heart, soul and mind then you must keep His Words and do what He says. However, to do this then you must know what He says so that you can do it. The person who wants to love the Lord with all their heart, soul and mind must know His Word. To the degree that you know His Word is to the degree that you can keep His words and to the degree that you keep His word is to the degree that you love Him.

I John 2:4-6 The one who says, “I have come to know Him,” and does not keep His commandments, is a liar, and the truth is not in him; but whoever keeps His word, in him the love of God has truly been perfected. By this we know that we are in Him: the one who says he abides in Him ought himself to walk in the same manner as He walked.

The Lord promises us that if we will keep His word then His love will be perfected in us and He will make His abode in us. When the Lord lives in you then there is nothing that can separate you from Him and His love. His love will abide in you and you will abide in His love. You will love Him and you will love life for He is life. This is the secret to a fulfilling life.

A Life with Few Regrets

If you jump off a building and you get hurt then you will regret it. In the same way, most people do very similar things and get hurt, however, they don’t make the connection that what they did caused the hurt and it wasn’t hitting the ground that caused the hurt. The pain was caused by jumping off of the building. They may say to themselves, “I am not going to hit the ground the next time”. A life of few regrets is a life that makes the connection between what they do and the consequences that follow.

Colossians 3:25 For he who does wrong will receive the consequences of the wrong which he has done, and that without partiality.

God is not mocked. We may think that we get away with something but we don’t. Whatever we sow that shall we reap.

Galatians 6:7 Do not be deceived, God is not mocked; for whatever a man sows, this he will also reap.

Some people’s consequences follow immediately and other’s consequences follow later. It is all a matter of time, whether sooner or later. If you were to jump off a building, you would feel free of all restraints when you are in free fall, but in a matter of time you would be hurt. This is why people feel “free” at first when they go against God’s laws.

I Timothy 5:24,25 The sins of some men are quite evident, going before them to judgment; for others, their sins follow after. Likewise also, deeds that are good are quite evident, and those which are otherwise cannot be concealed.

Some people will go with the wrong kind of person over and over again and wonder why they get hurt over and over again. If you find that you are experiencing the same kind of hurt over and over again then go to someone one who will speak the truth to you and help you. People can only take so much pain before it starts to destroy them or make them bitter. Bitterness is unresolved pain. The pain may be in your marriage, finances, job, relationships, family and unless the action that causes the pain is understood and corrected then the pain will continue.

Deuteronomy 28:1-8a and 13b,14 Now it shall be, if you diligently obey the Lord your God, being careful to do all His commandments which I command you today, the Lord your God will set you high above all the nations of the earth. All these blessings will come upon you and overtake you if you obey the Lord your God: “Blessed shall you be in the city, and blessed shall you be in the country. Blessed shall be the offspring of your body and the produce of your ground and the offspring of your beasts, the increase of your herd and the young of your flock. Blessed shall be your basket and your kneading bowl. Blessed shall you be when you come in, and blessed shall you be when you go out. The Lord shall cause your enemies who rise up against you to be defeated before you; they will come out against you one way and will flee before you seven ways. The Lord will command the blessing upon you in your barns and in all that you put your hand to, and He will bless you…if you listen to the commandments of the Lord your God, which I charge you today, to observe them carefully, and do not turn aside from any of the words which I command you today, to the right or to the left, to go after other gods to serve them.

To sum it up, the Lord will open up heaven and bless you until you can hardly stand it and then He will bless you even more if you will follow, obey Him and not go after other gods. The blessings are all of the good things in life that the Lord wants to give you but you must keep His ways and commandments. The gods of our day are not only the different eastern religions but also money, materialism, pleasure, sports and many more things that we give our hearts and time to rather than to the Lord.

Deuteronomy 28:15-20 But it shall come about, if you do not obey the Lord your God, to observe to do all His commandments and His statutes with which I charge you today, that all these curses will come upon you and overtake you: “Cursed shall you be in the city, and cursed shall you be in the country. Cursed shall be your basket and your kneading bowl. Cursed shall be the offspring of your body and the produce of your ground, the increase of your herd and the young of your flock. Cursed shall you be when you come in, and cursed shall you be when you go out. The Lord will send upon you curses, confusion, and rebuke, in all you undertake to do, until you are destroyed and until you perish quickly, on account of the evil of your deeds, because you have forsaken Me.

Deuteronomy 28:28-30a and 33b,34 The Lord will smite you with madness and with blindness and with bewilderment of heart; and you will grope at noon, as the blind man gropes in darkness, and you will not prosper in your ways; but you shall only be oppressed and robbed continually, with none to save you. You shall betroth a wife, but another man will violate her… and you will never be anything but oppressed and crushed continually. You shall be driven mad by the sight of what you see.

To sum this life up, you will not prosper and even if you do there will be a curse with it. You may be “successful” on your job but someone else may take the heart of your spouse and your children or some other curse. You may see achievement in another area but the personal cost will not be worth it because what you lose will often be a much greater treasure than what you gained. You will finally feel like you are going crazy or will do whatever you can to try to mentally escape what is happening. For this reason many drink or take drugs (often prescription) but they are only numbing agents and you have to eventually face your regrets.

John 10:10 The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I came that they may have life, and have it abundantly.

The Lord came that you may have life and the blessings that come with the life He gives to His children. It is Satan who deceives people into thinking that these “other gods” or things will bring fulfillment and happiness. The Lord says that He will not disappoint those who put their trust in Him. You will never regret following Him and doing what He says but you will one day, if not now, regret not following Him.

Joshua 24:15 If it is disagreeable in your sight to serve the Lord, choose for yourselves today whom you will serve…but as for me and my house, we will serve the Lord.

Ultimately, the choice is yours.

A Life that Understands God’s Design for The Wife

God’s ways are perfect and they are good. The Lord gave us marriage as a gift and for our good. God’s design is for the husband to love and honor his wife and for the wife to respect and love her husband. A husband needs to be respected and a wife needs to be loved. If a husband loves his wife then his wife will want to respect her husband and in the same way, if a wife respects her husband then the husband will want to love and cherish his wife. Together they are a picture of God’s relationship with His people, which is a love relationship. When we live according to God’s ways then we will know significance and worth and feel secure and free. When we follow His ways by faith then we receive understanding. Often we want to understand first and then follow but we are to “trust and obey” the Lord and then we receive understanding. The husband is not to “lord over the wife” and the wife is not to “go her own way”. The Lord has made the husband and wife to be one. It is the most intimate of all relationships and when experienced according to God’s design it becomes the sweetest of all relationships and brings much comfort and joy to both the husband and wife. They each need the other. It is true that “it is not good for man to be alone”. This applies to both men and women. Even though sometimes the Lord gives the grace for someone to not marry, it is God’s design for most to marry. I hope that this post will bring you encouragement and instruction on how to have not only life in your marriage but an abundant life in your marriage. Jesus Christ came that we might not only have life but an abundant life. He loves us and gave His life for us that we might know love, peace and joy, which comes through Him. This post is God’s design for the wife in the marriage.

A wife is a gift to her husband. So much so that the Lord uses the word helper in Genesis 2, which can also be translated savior. It is the only time in Scripture that word is referred to a person. Every other time that word refers to God.

Then the Lord God said, “It is not good for the man to be alone; I will make him a helper suitable for him.” Genesis 2:18

That is how important a wife is to her husband. When she is a godly wife then she is truly like the Proverbs 31 wife and she “does him good all the days of her life” and “the heart of her husband trusts in her and he has no lack of gain”. She does not bring her husband grief but she is so valuable to him that he not only desires her but he needs her.

An excellent wife, who can find?
For her worth is far above jewels.
The heart of her husband trusts in her,
And he will have no lack of gain.
She does him good and not evil
All the days of her life. Proverbs 31:10-12

The second word the Lord uses is that she is “suitable” to him. This word means in the Hebrew that she is to “correspond to him”. When the word correspond is broken down then it literally means “cor” and “respond”. She is to respond to his heart, since “cor” means heart. This is a beautiful picture of God’s people (the church) as we are to be like King David and be a people after God’s own heart.

Then the Lord God said, “It is not good for the man to be alone; I will make him a helper suitable for him.” Genesis 2:18

There are truths in God’s Word concerning marriage that are often overlooked. One of these truths is that “moral excellence” is the root of true love. A wife longs to feel loved by her husband. If she feels loved then she will want to do anything to please him because that is how the Lord has made her. However, if a couple has compromised morally before their marriage then they have sown seeds of destruction that are manifested after their marriage. This truth is found in II Peter 1. The Lord tells us seven characteristics that we must have if we want Christian love in our relationships. The first is to supply moral excellence.

Now for this very reason also, applying all diligence, in your faith supply moral excellence, and in your moral excellence, knowledge, and in your knowledge, self-control, and in your self-control, perseverance, and in your perseverance, godliness, and in your godliness, brotherly kindness, and in your brotherly kindness, love. II Peter 1:5-7

It is the female that allows a man to touch her in ways that are reserved for marriage. The Lord instructs the man not to “touch” a woman in Corinthians. The Lord says that it is not good for a man to touch a woman. The word “good” means the highest form of love. So, the way a man shows love to a woman is to wait until marriage to touch her. This is important because once there is touch in a relationship between a man and a woman then the relationship changes. She has given part of herself to the man. Not only has the relationship changed in that way but also the female begins to be deceived. She can no longer see clearly.

Now concerning the things about which you wrote, it is good for a man not to touch a woman. I Corinthians 7:1

There is another truth important in marriage relationships and this truth is to protect the female, especially when she can’t see clearly. This truth is in Corinthians that “the father gives the daughter away” to the man she is to marry. He transfers the authority and responsibility to the “husband to be” at the wedding ceremony. Since a woman is so easily deceived she is to never be out from under protection and authority. Her father is her protection from the Lord before marriage and her husband is her protection from the Lord after marriage. Sometimes when a wife does not feel loved by her husband then she needs to ask herself these two questions: “Did we morally compromise before marriage?” and “Did my father want me to marry him?” She may say to herself that her father did not say anything but that is usually because he knew that she would do it anyway. These truths are very important to understand because a female can never see through a man. She needs her father to see the man for who he is. A father will not want to give his daughter to a man that he does not approve of for his daughter. This truth is also very important to understand from a female point of view. If she violated these truths then she married this man out of disobedience and wanting to “go her own way” and then when she wants to leave him because she does not feel loved then the disobedience is continuing and now she wants to “go her own way” again. If she can get someone who has authority in the church to say that she can leave her husband then it seems that she has approval to leave her husband.

Older women likewise are to be reverent in their behavior, not malicious gossips nor enslaved to much wine, teaching what is good, so that they may encourage the young women to love their husbands, to love their children, to be sensible, pure, workers at home, kind, being subject to their own husbands, so that the word of God will not be dishonored. Titus 2:3-5

However, the Lord has given the responsibility to older women to teach the younger women to “love their husbands”. An older woman can see through the manipulative tactics of another woman whereas a pastor can not. The Lord has made men to protect women and often a woman can appeal to that aspect in a pastor so that he will tell her that if she is being abused then she should leave her husband.

But to the married I give instructions, not I, but the Lord, that the wife should not leave her husband. I Corinthians 7:10

Even if a woman is in a marriage that is difficult then the Lord has given her clear instruction on what a wife should do. He says in I Corinthians 7:10 “But to the married I give instructions, not I, but the Lord, that the wife should not leave her husband”. This is very clear and straightforward. She is not to leave. When a wife leaves her husband then she is relieving him of the responsibility of marriage that comes with the authority that God has given to him. She is getting out from her God given authority. She is allowing herself to be influenced and deceived by the evil one. She has no protection from the lies that she hears in her heart and the lies that she hears from others. She has opened herself up to much greater pain and grief. It is very rare that a man will abuse a woman that he respects. She sowed the seeds of disrespect before they were married. However, the marriage is not hopeless, for with the Lord, there is always hope.

In the same way, you wives, be submissive to your own husbands so that even if any of them are disobedient to the word, they may be won without a word by the behavior of their wives, as they observe your chaste and respectful behavior. Your adornment must not be merely external—braiding the hair, and wearing gold jewelry, or putting on dresses; but let it be the hidden person of the heart, with the imperishable quality of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is precious in the sight of God. For in this way in former times the holy women also, who hoped in God, used to adorn themselves, being submissive to their own husbands;just as Sarah obeyed Abraham, calling him lord, and you have become her children if you do what is right without being frightened by any fear. I Peter 3:1-6

The answer is not for her to leave. Rather the answer is for her to apply I Peter 3: 1-6 This passage is very important to understand when the first four words are understood. “In the same way” is referring to being mistreated as Jesus was and to do what Jesus did, if we are His follower. Jesus was reviled and suffered greatly. However, He kept entrusting Himself to Him to judges righteously. The Lord will deal with a husband who mistreats his wife. It is important to understand that nearly every wife will “feel” mistreated at some time or other and some will feel “abused”. Whether she is suffering unjustly or justly the Lord will help her. Women can be very sensitive to things that a man is totally unaware of and she may feel unloved and unappreciated. Sometimes a man has to learn how to “love” his wife. If a woman responds to her husband in a God given way then he will learn how to live with her in an understanding manner. This is crucial for a husband to understand as each wife is uniquely made.

You husbands in the same way, live with your wives in an understanding way…I Peter 3:7a

The next truth in the I Peter 3:1-6 passage is that she is to submit to her own husband. She is not obligated to submit to any other man. A woman can only submit and respond to one man. The expression of her submissiveness to her husband is obedience, “being submissive to their own husbands; just as Sarah obeyed Abraham, calling him lord,”.

Jesus Christ is a wife’s LORD and her husband is her lord.

But as the church is subject to Christ, so also the wives ought to be to their husbands in everything. Ephesians 5:24

Submission is obedience. Obedience is the expression of submissiveness. They are hand and glove. This is very important as a woman may be tempted to say to herself, “I am submitting to him but I don’t have to obey him”. The Lord has called her to not only submit but to obey her husband.

The Lord says that a woman is not to say that she made a mistake in marrying the man.

Do not let your speech cause you to sin and do not say in the presence of the messenger of God that it was a mistake. Why should God be angry on account of your voice and destroy the work of your hands? Ecclesiastes 5:6

What are the works of her hands? It is her children. One of the reasons why the Lord says that He hates divorce is because of what it does to the children.

This is another thing you do: you cover the altar of the Lord with tears, with weeping and with groaning, because He no longer regards the offering or accepts it with favor from your hand. Yet you say, ‘For what reason?’ Because the Lord has been a witness between you and the wife of your youth, against whom you have dealt treacherously, though she is your companion and your wife by covenant. But not one has done so who has a remnant of the Spirit. And what did that one do while he was seeking a godly offspring? Take heed then to your spirit, and let no one deal treacherously against the wife of your youth. For I hate divorce,” says the Lord, the God of Israel, “and him who covers his garment with wrong,” says the Lord of hosts. “So take heed to your spirit, that you do not deal treacherously.” Malachi 2:13-16

How many children have been hurt by divorce? How it must grieve the heart of the Lord. What is the answer for the wife if her husband mistreats her? She is to keep her marriage vow.

When you make a vow to God, do not be late in paying it; for He takes no delight in fools. Pay what you vow! Ecclesiastes 5:4,5

The marriage vow is made to God. It is not ended until death. Even it one of the married persons is unfaithful it does not nullify the marriage vow of the other. The Lord gives instruction on what a wife should do if she does leave her husband.

(but if she does leave, she must remain unmarried, or else be reconciled to her husband), I Corinthians 7:11a

Again, the Lord speaks to this issue in His Word.

But if when you do what is right and suffer for it you patiently endure it, this finds favor with God. I Peter 2:20b

Many struggles in marriages come from not following God’s blueprint for marriage. However, He says that when His ways are not kept then grace abounds. Grace abounds to do the right thing. This grace is not a freedom to do what we want or “as a covering for evil”. This grace is the ability to live in obedience to God’s ways.

but where sin increased, grace abounded all the more, Romans 5:20b

The Lord says in His Word that, “God meets the one who delights in doing righteousness”. Righteousness is doing it right, which is obeying His commandments and living God’s way. Another verse is “the work of righteousness is peace and the service of righteousness is quietness and confidence forever”. How wonderful it is when God’s people live according to God’s ways. There is peace in the home and grace truly reigns through righteousness, that is, living according to God’s blueprint.

so grace would reign through righteousness to eternal life through Jesus Christ our Lord. Romans 5:21b

It is only by God’s grace that a husband and wife can learn to “consider one another more important than themselves”, which is the attitude that characterized Jesus Christ. The biggest enemy to love is selfishness and it is only in Christ that someone can learn to love in an unselfish manner. When this is done in the marriage then this couple experiences the greatest of all loves and they become a fragrant aroma of God’s love to all who know them.

Do nothing from selfishness or empty conceit, but with humility of mind regard one another as more important than yourselves; do not merely look out for your own personal interests, but also for the interests of others. Have this attitude in yourselves which was also in Christ Jesus, Philippians 2:3-5

A Life with a Home Within

When we become a believer in Jesus Christ then the Lord comes to live within us through His Holy Spirit and He makes a home within us where He comes to dwell in us.

I will ask the Father, and He will give you another Helper, that He may be with you forever; the Spirit of truth, whom the world cannot receive, because it does not see Him or know Him, but you know Him because He abides with you and will be in you. John 14:16,17

The Holy Spirit is not only a Helper who is always present in times of trouble but He is also a Comforter who comforts us in our sorrows and struggles.

But the Helper, the Holy Spirit, whom the Father will send in My name, He will teach you all things, and bring to your remembrance all that I said to you. Peace I leave with you; My peace I give to you; not as the world gives do I give to you. Do not let your heart be troubled, nor let it be fearful. John 14:26,27

The Lord wants us to learn to abide, or in other words, live in Him, who is the home within us so that we might live continually in His love and comfort, and also in His strength and His instruction.

I will instruct you and teach you in the way which you should go; I will counsel you with My eye upon you. Psalm 32:8

The way that the Holy Spirit counsels us is through God’s Word. The Lord tells us to abide in His Word and let His Words abide in us. The word “abide” means to make your home in such a place, or in other words, make it your abode. So, as we make God’s Word dwell within us and we dwell within His Word then we will experience His comfort and love and know His instruction and protection. His Word is our refuge and home, a place of sweet contentment.

If you abide in Me, and My words abide in you, ask whatever you wish, and it will be done for you. My Father is glorified by this, that you bear much fruit, and so prove to be My disciples. Just as the Father has loved Me, I have also loved you; abide in My love. John 15:7-9

When we learn to abide in Him and have His Words abide in us then He says that we can ask whatever we wish and it will be done for us. This promise shows how much the Lord wants us to learn to abide in Him and let His Words abide in us. The value of the promise shows the importance of the instruction. When we abide in His Word then His thoughts take the place of our thoughts and His ways take the place of our ways. Everything we do in life is a response to the thoughts within us. If those thoughts are negative and destructive then our actions will be negative and destructive. If the thoughts within us are good then our actions will be good, not only for us but for all who are around us.

“For My thoughts are not your thoughts,
Nor are your ways My ways,” declares the Lord.
“For as the heavens are higher than the earth,
So are My ways higher than your ways
And My thoughts than your thoughts. Isaiah 55:8,9

The Lord’s thoughts are good and they will bring you great comfort. His ways are perfect and as we learn them and do them we will experience His great love.

Just as the Father has loved Me, I have also loved you; abide in My love. If you keep My commandments, you will abide in My love; just as I have kept My Father’s commandments and abide in His love. These things I have spoken to you so that My joy may be in you, and that your joy may be made full. John 15:9-11

God’s commandments are His ways. We learn His ways through His commandments which are in His Word. When His Word abides in us then it helps us keep His commandments. When we keep His commandments we experience His love and our joy is made full.

Incline your ear and hear the words of the wise,
And apply your mind to my knowledge;
For it will be pleasant if you keep them within you,
That they may be ready on your lips.
So that your trust may be in the Lord,
I have taught you today, even you.
Have I not written to you excellent things
Of counsels and knowledge,
To make you know the certainty of the words of truth
That you may correctly answer him who sent you? Proverbs 22:17-21

How do we abide in God’s Word and how do we have it abide in us. We do this by reading God’s Word and then by memorizing it and putting it in our heart. As we do this then God’s Word becomes more and more pleasant for us. We learn the certainty or the “truth” of the words of truth. Then one day when He calls us home and we meet the Lord Jesus face to face we will be able to correctly answer to the One who has loved us so much that He died for us that we might have an abundant life here on earth and eternal life in the life to come.

“Come to Me, all who are weary and heavy-laden, and I will give you rest. Take My yoke upon you and learn from Me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For My yoke is easy and My burden is light.” Matthew 11:28-30

Do you need comfort and love? Are you weary of turmoil within and a heaviness in your soul. Come to Jesus Christ. He will give you rest. Learn from Him for He is gentle and humble of heart and you will find rest for your souls. The Lord Jesus Christ does not turn away anyone who calls on Him. His arms are open wide. He went to the cross and died for all of us. He rose from the dead and lives again and will come again for those who have come to Him in this life.

A Life with Prudence

Wisdom is how to achieve a desire result. For example, if you want to have a long and satisfying marriage then you need wisdom on what to do to have this happen. If you want to be successful in your career then you need wisdom as to how to make this happen. Prudence is how to avoid an undesirable result. If you want a long and satisfied marriage then you need prudence to know what to avoid so that your marriage does not fall apart. If you want to be successful then you need to not only know what to do but you need to know what not to do so that you do not fail. Wisdom is knowing what to do and prudence is understanding what not to do.

Proverbs 8:12 “I, wisdom, dwell with prudence,
And I find knowledge and discretion.

Wisdom and prudence go hand in hand. They are the two different sides of the coin and you need both. They dwell together and with them you will also find knowledge and discretion.

Proverbs 8:11 “For wisdom is better than jewels;
And all desirable things cannot compare with her.

Wisdom is more precious than jewels and all desirable things can not compare with wisdom and prudence.

Proverbs 8:17-21 “I love those who love me;
And those who diligently seek me will find me.
“Riches and honor are with me,
Enduring wealth and righteousness.
“My fruit is better than gold, even pure gold,
And my yield better than choicest silver.
“I walk in the way of righteousness,
In the midst of the paths of justice,
To endow those who love me with wealth,
That I may fill their treasuries.

Wisdom loves those who love wisdom. If you diligently seek for wisdom then you will find wisdom. Wisdom is in the way of righteousness and in the paths of justice.

Proverbs 8:35,36 “For he who finds me finds life
And obtains favor from the Lord.
“But he who sins against me injures himself;
All those who hate me love death.”

When you find wisdom and prudence then you will find life and you will obtain favor from the Lord. Those who neglect the discipline of learning wisdom and prudence will experience grief and death. The prudent person sees the evil that an action will cause and they will hide from it. The naive person is one who does not know wisdom. We all come into the world naive and we must learn wisdom.

Proverbs 22:3 The prudent sees the evil and hides himself,
But the naive go on, and are punished for it.

Are you naive and do not know what to do? Ask the Lord and He will give you wisdom and you will find that when you seek the Lord that you will discover wisdom for in Jesus Himself is hidden all the treasures of wisdom and knowledge.

Colossians 2:2,3 that their hearts may be encouraged, having been knit together in love, and attaining to all the wealth that comes from the full assurance of understanding, resulting in a true knowledge of God’s mystery, that is, Christ Himself, in whom are hidden all the treasures of wisdom and knowledge.

This is one of the reasons that the people were amazed at His teaching for He was teaching them God’s ways, which is the expression of wisdom. The Lord wants to give you prudence and wisdom so that you may avoid the snares of death.

Proverbs 1:4 To give prudence to the naive, To the youth knowledge and discretion,

Do you lack wisdom and prudence? Do you struggle in any areas? Do you struggle with bad habits or bad thoughts? Are you frustrated or feel defeated in any area? Ask the Lord for wisdom and prudence. He wants to give to you and will give to you generously that you may be perfect and complete lacking in nothing.

James 1:5 But if any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask of God, who gives to all generously and without reproach, and it will be given to him.

A Life with Kindness

We all long to be around kind people and we want others to show kindness to us.

What is desirable in a man is his kindness, Proverbs 11:22a

Kindness comes to those who are kind.

Will they not go astray who devise evil? But kindness and truth will be to those who devise good. Proverbs 14:22

Kindness is not a characteristic that comes naturally. We are all basically selfish and self centered. Kindness is a character quality that must be learned and received. We learn kindness when we receive kindness.

With the kind You show Yourself kind; Psalm 18:25a

There is a cycle in our lives. When we are shown kindness then we learn to be kind. When we are kind then we receive kindness from others. However, if we are all basically self centered where do we begin to learn kindness.

Or do you think lightly of the riches of His kindness and tolerance and patience, not knowing that the kindness of God leads you to repentance? Romans 2:4

The Lord is kind and when we experience the kindness of God then that is the beginning of our repentance. Repentance is turning from ourselves to God. Repentance is recognizing the selfishness in ourselves and turning to the Lord Jesus Christ to change us.

But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, Galatians 5:22

We can not change ourselves but the Lord changes us when we become born again by His Spirit. When we are born again, we receive His Spirit and become His child. We are born into His family and He becomes our Father. He is kind and the fruit of His Spirit within us is kindness. When He comes to live within us then He shows His kindness to us and enables us to be kind to others.

When we are kind to others then we will experience more and more the kindness of God. When we experience the kindness of God then we want to show kindness to others even more. It is a beautiful cycle that the Lord gives to us. Before we realize it our life is full on the inside and we will no longer feel empty as we did when our life was all about us and satisfying our desires and needs.

The generous man will be prosperous, And he who waters will himself be watered. Proverbs 11:25

The outcome for the person who learns to be kind is that their life will be satisfied and full of meaning and the Lord will water their life. The hand that gives is always full but the hand that receives is always empty.