A Life that Understands Who Rules Your Husband

Understanding that Every Man Has One Who Is His Ruler

No man is a law unto himself but every man has One over him who is his head and rules him. The sooner a man recognizes who his Ruler is and submits himself to his Ruler’s laws then the happier he will be. The Lord made every man to be a king but the Lord says that He is the Ruler of the kings of the earth. No matter how much honor, position, rank and authority that a man is given in this life there is still One who rules over him and is his authority. The Lord Jesus Christ is Ruler over every man and He is the head of every family. Someone may well ask, “What if the man does not recognize the Lord Jesus Christ as his authority and ruler?” The answer to that question is that Jesus Christ is the Head of every man and home and whether a man or husband recognizes the Lordship, authority and rule of Jesus Christ, it does not change the fact that Jesus Christ is Lord of all. A man will be miserable and have sorrow in one form or another if he does not submit to Jesus Christ. He will have even greater misery if he mistreats his wife or his children. If a wife or child has put their trust in Jesus Christ and is being mistreated by their husband or father and cries out to the Lord Jesus Christ then the Lord will come and protect them. The Lord is ultimately the One whom we trust and He is very effective in dealing with an unruly husband or father. A wife who trusts in the Lord can submit to her husband because God is greater than her husband and promises to exercise His power in dealing with her husband if her husband does not love her and live with her in an understanding manner.

Wives, be subject to your own husbands, as to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife, as Christ also is the head of the church, He Himself being the Savior of the body. But as the church is subject to Christ, so also the wives ought to be to their husbands in everything. Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself up for her, Ephesians 5:22-25

But I want you to understand that Christ is the head of every man, and the man is the head of a woman, and God is the head of Christ. I Corinthians 11:3

Understanding What Both Husband and Wife Need to Do

There is an order of authority in the home. It is for our protection and provision. A person under authority can always go to the one who is their authority for protection and provision. With authority comes responsibility. The higher the authority then the greater the responsibility. The Lord is the final authority of which we are all under. However, His provision comes through the one whom He has given the responsibility to. Jesus loved His own who were in the world and He loved them to the end. The Lord has called the husband to love his wife in a sacrificial expression of love. This means that he is to die to himself and his desires in order to love his wife the way she needs to be loved. He is to live with her in an understanding manner. The Lord meets the one who wants to do life right and the Lord will teach the husband how to love his wife and when he becomes a father then the Lord will teach him how to love his children. In a similar way, a woman is to look to the Lord and He will teach her how, as a wife, she is to respect her husband and submit to him and as a mother, how she is to love her children. This is much easier to do if her husband loves her. The greatest thing a father can do for his children is to love their mother with a Christlike love. The greatest thing a mother can do for her children is to respect and honor their father. When children grow up in a loving home where the parents love the Lord and love each other then the children will learn to love and respect others also. The children will feel loved because when parents love each other then they will love their children. A person’s relationship with their spouse is an expression of their relationship with the Lord. Do not say that you love God if you do not love your spouse and your children.

If someone says, “I love God,” and hates his brother, he is a liar; for the one who does not love his brother whom he has seen, cannot love God whom he has not seen. I John 4:20

If you want to see the Lord act on your behalf then you must do what He says. He will protect you and He will very severely deal with your husband if he is not treating you right. If you are under God’s authority, which means, that you must live under your husband’s authority and submit to him then the Lord will act on your behalf. The Lord says that He will not hear a man’s prayers if the man does not love his wife and treat her right. The Lord says that He will not accept the husband’s worship if he mistreats his wife. The Lord says that if a man does not provide for his family then he is worse than an unbeliever, who will spend eternity in hell. The Lord says that there are some serious consequences for the husband and father who does fulfill his God given responsibilities. However, the wife and the children will not see God’s love unless they are doing what they ought to be doing. The Lord is the head of every man and the husband is the head of his wife and children. The wife needs to submit to the husband and the children need to obey their father. When they are submissive and obedient to the Lord then they need to cry out to the Lord if there is anything wrong. He will hear their cries to Him and answer them.

For in this way in former times the holy women also, who hoped in God, used to adorn themselves, being submissive to their own husbands; just as Sarah obeyed Abraham, calling him lord, and you have become her children if you do what is right without being frightened by any fear. You husbands in the same way, live with your wives in an understanding way, as with someone weaker, since she is a woman; and show her honor as a fellow heir of the grace of life, so that your prayers will not be hindered. I Peter 3:5-7

“This is another thing you do: you cover the altar of the Lord with tears, with weeping and with groaning, because He no longer regards the offering or accepts it with favor from your hand. Yet you say, ‘For what reason?’ Because the Lord has been a witness between you and the wife of your youth, against whom you have dealt treacherously, though she is your companion and your wife by covenant. Malachi 2:13-14

A Life that Understands that Your Husband is a King

Understanding God’s Design for a Man to Be a King

The Lord made every man to be a king. A king is a ruler and God made men to conquer and rule. A man needs a queen to share in his kingdom. The most important decision that a man makes, other than where he will spend eternity, is who will be his queen. An excellent wife is the crown of her husband. If he chooses an excellent wife then he will have far more advantages in life to conquer and rule. An excellent wife will be a wife that he can trust. She will only do him good and will not cause him grief. She will have his best interests in her mind and do what is right. She will give him honor. An excellent wife will not seek to get her own way but she will seek to do her husband’s will. She will not manipulate him or keep secrets from him, such as, how she spends money, where she goes and who she talks to. She will not talk about his struggles, weaknesses or faults with other women (not even with her mother). She will not correspond with other men. Her husband will be able to trust her completely and he will be able to delegate responsibilities to her. He will listen to her advice for she will have his best interests at heart and not have ulterior self-seeking motives. She will understand that a children’s glory is their father and she will teach their children to honor their father and she will not ever criticize him to their children. She will not ever say, “don’t tell your father”. If there is a question as to what to do, then she will say, “let us ask your father” and if he is not available then she will know her husband well enough to know what he would want them to do. An excellent wife will recognize her husband’s right to rule.

An excellent wife is the crown of her husband, Proverbs 12:4

Understanding How a Man Becomes a King

A man first learns to rule well by ruling his wife. This is not a bad thing but it is a good thing because it is her protection. She was deceived in the garden by the Serpent’s beauty and charm. She is still easily deceived. God made husband and wife to be joint rulers and she is also a ruler but her husband rules over her. God rules over the husband. If she will trust God then she can learn to trust God through her husband. The Lord will protect her from harm if she will trust the Lord. The Lord’s provision for protection for females is first their father and then their husband. They must stay under their God given authority. If they get out from or go against their God given authority then it is only a matter of time before they will be violated. After a man rules his wife then he rules his children. An excellent wife helps him to be king in their home. She teaches her children to obey their father, not only through her words, but through her example. When a man rules well in his household then he believes he can conquer in the world. He can face each day with confidence.

To the woman He said,
“I will greatly multiply
Your pain in childbirth,
In pain you will bring forth children;
Yet your desire will be for your husband,
And he will rule over you.” Genesis 3:16

Men are very different from women, not only physically, but psychologically. When a man is pleased with a woman then he will give up to half of his kingdom. He wants a queen who will share in his glory. He is looking for a trustworthy woman to love and one whom can give himself to and all that he has. If you become that excellent wife then you will have no regrets. Your husband and children will praise you and your works will praise you also. You will be a success and your husband will be a success also.

Her children rise up and bless her;
Her husband also, and he praises her, saying:
“Many daughters have done nobly,
But you excel them all.”
Charm is deceitful and beauty is vain,
But a woman who fears the Lord, she shall be praised.
Give her the product of her hands,
And let her works praise her in the gates. Proverbs 31:28-31

A Life that Understands the Need to Be Wise

Understand the Source of Wisdom

The Bible says that if a person is wise then they will experience the wonderful and sweet fruit of wisdom, which is love, purity, peace, gentleness, mercy, knowledge, honor, riches and life. However, if a person is not wise then they will experience the bitter fruit of not being wise, which is a broken heart, jealousy, envy, much grief, regret, guilt, shame, loneliness, bitterness, ignorance, a hard life, dishonor and death. There is nothing that can compare to wisdom. Wisdom gives life to life and keeps a person from experiencing the snares of death. Wisdom is available to all and whoever finds it loves his own soul. He who does not find wisdom neglects himself and brings grief to himself. Wisdom is more valuable than riches, honor, and power, for without wisdom all of these other things can destroy a person. A person may gain the whole world but without wisdom then he will never be satisfied and will only want more. Wisdom is a gift that comes from God. A person who is not a Christian can read God’s Word, which is the Bible, and receive knowledge but not wisdom. Wisdom is the illumination of knowledge to know what to do for a desired good result. Many people want wisdom without God but wisdom only comes from God. A nonChristian can only have knowledge and knowledge usually makes arrogant. It is when we humble ourselves before God that He will give us wisdom. Wisdom is necessary for true success. The success of the world will ultimately destroy a person if he does not get wisdom. It is only the Lord that gives riches, honor, power, etc. without sorrow.

Blessed is a person who finds wisdom,
And one who obtains understanding.
For her profit is better than the profit of silver,
And her produce better than gold.
She is more precious than jewels,
And nothing you desire compares with her.
Long life is in her right hand;
In her left hand are riches and honor.
Her ways are pleasant ways,
And all her paths are peace.
She is a tree of life to those who take hold of her,
And happy are those who hold on to her. Proverbs 3:13-18

Understand that Wisdom Is the Instruction for Life

Wisdom belongs to the Lord, who is the author of life. Wisdom is how to live life right so that you will be successful and experience great joy and gladness. Wisdom is protection from pain and wisdom is instruction on how to gain what is good. Most people ultimately learn wisdom from either experiencing the pain that comes from not doing wisdom or they experience the happiness that comes from doing wisdom. Wisdom is how to do life right. We recognize when life is done right but often we do not know how to do it for ourselves. We can see if someone has a good marriage but often we don’t know what to do to have a good marriage. We can see if another’s children are excelling in life but often we struggle with getting our child to do well. Wisdom is not elusive to the one who seeks God. The one who does not seek the Lord will not ever find wisdom. He may find knowledge but he will not receive wisdom. He will only know the pain in his heart of not doing wisdom. Wisdom belongs to the Lord and He gives it to those who know Him. The knowledge of God is understanding and the one who has understanding will also have wisdom.

Wisdom rests in the heart of one who has understanding, But in the heart of fools it is made known. Proverbs 14:33

If you will only ask the Lord for wisdom then He will give it to you. It is one of the few promises that the Lord gives to all, to whoever will ask Him for wisdom, that He will give it and give it generously. The Lord wants to help you. The Lord loves you. He is waiting for us to come to Him. If you are struggling in an area then go to Him and ask Him for wisdom.

But if any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask of God, who gives to all generously and without reproach, and it will be given to him. James 1:5

Get wisdom. Humble yourself before the Lord and acknowledge Jesus Christ as the source of true wisdom. You will be glad. Scoffing is turning our back on the Lord and on His ways. When we act according to our understanding or the bad counsel of others then we are the ones who suffer. God does not delight in your pain but He delights in the one who comes to Him, even if it is to avoid pain. Taste and see that the Lord is good. It is the kindness of God that leads us to repent of following our own thoughts and wanting to go our own ways. He loves you and His ways are good and kind.

If you are wise, you are wise for yourself, And if you scoff, you alone will bear it. Proverbs 9:12

A Life with Love is a Gift

Love is not elusive nor is it a fantasy but love is a gift. Love is a gift that God gives to mankind from Him and it is the most pleasant and desirable of all God’s gifts.

Love is patient, love is kind and is not jealous; love does not brag and is not arrogant, does not act unbecomingly; it does not seek its own, is not provoked, does not take into account a wrong suffered, does not rejoice in unrighteousness, but rejoices with the truth; bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Love never fails; I Corinthians 13:5-8a

Love enters the heart and changes a person from the inside to the outside. When someone knows that they are loved then they are secure and satisfied. Love takes away fears, humiliation, shame, rejection, anxieties and every other negative thing that destroys us. Love can not be bought and there is not anything anyone can do to work for love. Love is a gift from the giver. Love must be received as a gift.

But now faith, hope, love, abide these three; but the greatest of these is love. I Corinthians 13:13

Faith will one day be done away with because it won’t be necessary. Hope will one day be fulfilled. Love will never end. Love is eternal and those who have love will live eternally. God is love and when a person becomes a Christian then God comes to live in them and when He comes into their life then love comes into their heart.

The one who does not love does not know God, for God is love. I John 4:8

God is love and God created man to be loved. Man turned his back on God’s love and chose to go his own way. God’s love did not change and He sent Jesus Christ, His only begotten Son into the world to show mankind His great love.

By this the love of God was manifested in us, that God has sent His only begotten Son into the world so that we might live through Him. I John 4:9

Jesus Christ lived a perfect life, died for our sins and rose again. He is coming again for those who love Him, so that they might be with Him forever. He will love them forever and they will live forever in His love. The gift of God’s love comes through receiving Jesus Christ as Lord and Savior.

For I am convinced that neither death, nor life, nor angels, nor principalities, nor things present, nor things to come, nor powers, nor height, nor depth, nor any other created thing, will be able to separate us from the love of God, which is in Christ Jesus our Lord. Romans 8:38,39

There is nothing that can separate us from God’s love once we have received it. God’s love is forever. When we receive Jesus Christ then He releases us from our sins.

and from Jesus Christ, the faithful witness, the firstborn of the dead, and the ruler of the kings of the earth. To Him who loves us and released us from our sins by His blood— Revelation 1:5

This gift is offered to all and any who will come to Jesus Christ can receive God’s gift of love. Jesus Christ will never leave the one who comes to Him and receives Him. When we receive Jesus Christ then we receive God’s love and we come into His kingdom.

For He rescued us from the domain of darkness, and transferred us to the kingdom of His beloved Son, in whom we have redemption, the forgiveness of sins. Colossians 1:13,14

When we turn from ourselves to God to follow Him then He transfers us from the kingdom of darkness to the kingdom of His beloved Son, Jesus Christ, in whom we receive forgiveness of all of our sins.

that if you confess with your mouth Jesus as Lord, and believe in your heart that God raised Him from the dead, you will be saved; for with the heart a person believes, resulting in righteousness, and with the mouth he confesses, resulting in salvation. For the Scripture says, “Whoever believes in Him will not be disappointed.” For there is no distinction between Jew and Greek; for the same Lord is Lord of all, abounding in riches for all who call on Him; for “Whoever will call on the name of the Lord will be saved.” Romans 10:9-13

When we receive Jesus Christ then we also receive God’s gift of love. When Jesus Christ comes into our life then God loves us with the same love with which He loves Jesus. This is an amazing fact. We, who are sinners, and Jesus Christ who never sinned are loved with the same love.

so that the world may know that You sent Me, and loved them, even as You have loved Me. John 17:23b

Do you feel loved? Do you know that there is One who loves you? Have you received the gift of love? His love for you will never leave nor will His love ever fail.

for He Himself has said, “I will never desert you, nor will I ever forsake you,” Hebrews 13:5b

A Life Strong in Storms of Life

Building your life is like building a house. If it is done right then it will stand when the storms come. However, it is too late to build your life during the storms, it must be done during the sunshiney days. You will be secure and will not be fearful if you build it with the right foundation and the right materials.

Proverbs 14:1 A wise woman builds her house but a foolish woman tears it down with her own hands.

The wise woman builds her life on the Word of God so she will be ready when the storms come. She will gain wisdom through the trials to strengthen her life so that she will not  be anxious or depressed over the outcome. Neither will she be boastful for she understands that there is a Master Builder who has a design and a plan and He does not make mistakes.

I Corinthians 3:11 For no man can lay a foundation other than the one which is laid, which is Jesus Christ.
Jesus Christ is the only foundation for any life that stands strong. Everything else will ultimately fail. A life must be built upon His Word, for He and His Word are equal.
Psalm 138:2 For You have magnified Your word according to all Your name.
The Lord invites all to come to Him. Listen to what He says and do it.

Luke 6:47-49 “Everyone who comes to Me and hears My words and act on them, I will show you whom he is like: he is like a man building a house, who dug deep and laid a foundation on the rock; and when a flood occurred, the torrent burst against that house and could not shake it, because it had been well built But the one who has heard and has not acted accordingly, is like a man who built a house on the ground without any foundation; an the torrent burst against it and immediately it collapsed, and the ruin of that house was great.”

If you will do exactly as the Master Builder and One who made you has instructed you, then your life will be firmly rooted and will stand strong when the storms come. You will not panic because you acted wisely.

Proverbs 24:3 By wisdom a house is built,
And by understanding it is established;

Finally, if you trust in the Lord and build your life on His Word then He will build it through you.

Psalm 127:1a Unless the Lord builds the house,
They labor in vain who build it;

 

 

A Life that Understands Blueprint for Marriage

Understand that There is a Blueprint for Marriage

God’s blueprint for marriage is perfect. God’s blueprint for marriage is right. Another word for God’s way in marriage is righteousness. Where there is righteousness then there will be peace, quietness and confidence. When these qualities are not present in a relationship then that is an indication that something is not being done right. Go back to the blueprint. Look at the blueprint for before marriage and the blueprint for after marriage. Some things that are wrong before marriage are right after marriage and some other things that are right before marriage are wrong after marriage. It is wrong for a girl to submit to a guy before marriage and it is wrong for her to not submit after marriage. (A girl is to obey her father before marriage and after marriage she is to submit to her husband). It is wrong for a girl and boy to know each other physically before marriage and it is wrong to withhold the physical after marriage. (Love must rule and both the spouses must be considerate of each other. There are also times when the sexual aspect should not be experienced, such as during a woman’s time of month and around six weeks after she has a baby. The length of time is in the Bible, it differs for a girl baby and a boy baby.) There is a time and place for everything. Many marriage problems are because the relationship was not done right before marriage and the couple reaps the bad fruit in the marriage. Other marriage problems are because the blueprint was not followed after marriage due to ignorance about God’s ways. God created man and woman equal. There is equality in marriage but there is also an order for the good and protection of the woman. There are also different responsibilities that come with the different positions. There are many things that are not mentioned and if it is not defined in the Bible, then it does not matter which spouse does it. For example, there is no mention of cooking, changing diapers, etc. nor is it wrong for the wife to work, etc. as long as her responsibilities in the home are attended to properly. Again, if life is not being done right, then there will not be peace, quietness or confidence. If each spouse is in a right relationship with God then the good fruit of love, joy and peace will be seen in their marriage. If a marriage is done right then there will be the good fruit in the children of good manners (respect towards others), good behavior and a love for the Lord. If a family is done right, then that family will have the good fruit of love for others and will be a blessing and light to the world. (These are also the qualifications of a leader.)

By wisdom a house is built,
And by understanding it is established;
And by knowledge the rooms are filled
With all precious and pleasant riches.
A wise man is strong,
And a person of knowledge increases power.
For by wise guidance you will wage war,
And in an abundance of counselors there is victory. Proverbs 24:3-6

Understand Destruction that Comes From No Blueprint in Marriage

Much time is spent in planning a wedding but much more time needs to be spent in planning the marriage. Plan and take care of your marriage and God will use your marriage to take care of you. It is not good for man to be alone and God designed marriage for people so that they would not be alone. Woe to one who falls and there is not one who loves them to pick them up. We need someone in our lives to love and to love us. We need someone who we can trust and who will be there during times of better or worse. When there are children we need parents to raise them and not a single parent or no parent. God’s plan from the beginning was good and it was loving. God’s plan still is good and it is still loving but we must follow His plan to experience that love and His goodness. Read God’s Word and do it. The Lord has much to say about the time in a relationship before marriage and how to prepare for marriage and much to say about marriage. Nearly everything that is in the world about marriage is either a lie or a truth mixed with lies. God is not a God of confusion. If you seek Him then you will find Him, if you seek Him with all of your heart. He is light and in Him you will see light. He will show you what you need to do each step of the way.

“Now why do you call Me, ‘Lord, Lord,’ and do not do what I say? Everyone who comes to Me and hears My words and acts on them, I will show you whom he is like: he is like a man building a house, who dug deep and laid a foundation on the rock; and when there was a flood, the river burst against that house and yet it could not shake it, because it had been well built. But the one who has heard and has not acted accordingly is like a man who built a house on the ground without a foundation; and the river burst against it and it immediately collapsed, and the ruin of that house was great.” Luke 6:46-49

Now is the time to build your life on the Lord and His Words. When the storm comes then it is too late to build. Not everyone who calls Jesus Lord belongs to Him. Jesus Christ is only your Lord if you do what He says. Act on what He says and then you will often understand it. Do not wait to understand it and then act on it. That is not faith. Faith is trusting the Lord in what He says and doing it. Faith is building your life on His Word. When you live this way then you will not be confused and He will help you and guide you. The Lord meets the one who delights in living according to God’s ways. Trust Him and you will not be disappointed.

A Life with Love on How to Love

Love is not random nor are some people just lucky to find love. Love does not just happen with two people. Just as there are principles in finance and laws of nature so there are laws and principles on love. Within a person there must be the root for love and the right nurturing for love to grow and mature. There is a root for love and just as the roots produce the fruit in nature so love is a fruit with a certain root within an individual. We can not produce a true and lasting love on our own. It must be produced within us and love must have the necessary root so that it might bear the fruit of love. Without this root there will be no true and lasting love. When there is a lasting and true love between two people then there will also be the other characteristic of a loving relationship and, that is, there will be trust. Love and trust are in all great marriages.

Now for this very reason also, applying all diligence, in your faith supply moral excellence, and in your moral excellence, knowledge, and in your knowledge, self-control, and in your self-control, perseverance, and in your perseverance, godliness, and in your godliness, brotherly kindness, and in your brotherly kindness, love. II Peter 1:5-7

Moral excellence is the characteristic of anyone who is worthy of trust. A morally excellent person is one who will not compromise. They don’t lie, cheat or steal. They don’t deceive others nor slander others. A morally excellent person keeps their commitments even to their own hurt. Their word is good and can be trusted. These characteristics are what we want in our leaders, neighbors, friends and marriage partners, but more important than desiring them in others, is for us to cultivate them within ourselves. How blessed is the person who has a leader, neighbor, friend or spouse with moral excellence and even more blessed is the person whose own life is characterized by moral excellence. The root of true love is moral excellence.

Grace and peace be multiplied to you in the knowledge of God and of Jesus our Lord; II Peter 1:2

The beginning of moral excellence is a knowledge of God. All moral excellence is based in God. Some people want to do good without God, but it is impossible to do good with a pure heart, on our own, for our very own hearts are corrupted. When life is all about self then there will be a conflict of interest. If there is One greater than ourselves that we want to please, then we will be willing to sacrifice what we want, for the knowledge of Him. When we want to please Him then we will know Him and when we know Him then grace and peace will be multiplied to us. Grace and peace are found in Jesus Christ. We can not give to others what we ourselves do not have. When we receive grace and peace then we can give grace and peace to others.

seeing that His divine power has granted to us everything pertaining to life and godliness, through the true knowledge of Him who called us by His own glory and excellence. II Peter 1:3

When we know the Lord Jesus Christ and we receive His grace and peace then He also gives us His divine power in everything that pertains to life and living a Christlike life. This divine power comes through the true knowledge of Him. We must know the Lord, not merely know about Him, but we must know Him with our heart, soul and mind. This is how we receive the true knowledge of God that comes through His Word, which is the revelation of who He is. He has called us to know Him and He wants us to share in His glory and excellence. We do this through following Him in obedience to His Word.

For by these He has granted to us His precious and magnificent promises, so that by them you may become partakers of the divine nature, having escaped the corruption that is in the world by lust. II Peter 1:4

The Lord wants us to have a loving marriage and relationships where there is trust. The Lord plans only good for us. He wants us to escape the corruption that is in the world. The corruption in the world comes from the evil desires of others and if we don’t become like Christ, who is good and loving, then we too, will be corrupted by lust. Lust is the same Greek word as desire. A desire becomes a lust when it is desire that is out of the will of God. God’s will is moral excellence. The only way that we can become partakers of the divine nature is through the promises of God. The promises of God are magnificent, glorious and excellent. When we live according to His Words and His promises then we will live a magnificent, glorious and excellent life. In doing so, we will become trustworthy and will be a blessing to many. If we choose to live according to our own ways and desires then much grief will come to us and many broken and damaged relationships. Our lives will become corrupted.

For indeed we have had good news preached to us, just as they also; but the word they heard did not profit them, because it was not united by faith in those who heard. Hebrews 4:2

Faith in the Lord Jesus Christ is the beginning of moral excellence. Not just believing that Jesus Christ lived, but also believing that He is the Son of God, that He lived for you, that He died for you, that He was raised from the dead for you and He lives today for you to know Him. He loves you. This is the good news. However, this good news will only profit those who believe it and unite themselves to Christ in faith. When a person comes to Christ then they receive Jesus Christ into their life and their life starts to become transformed in that excellent and glorious likeness of Christ through His precious and magnificent promises.

A Life that Understands Marriage Needs a Builder

Understand that a Marriage Needs a Master Builder

Just as with any aspect of creation, to understand it, we must go to the creator. To understand a work of art, it helps to know the artist. To fully comprehend the building plans we must know the builder. The Lord is the One who created marriage. Marriage is a beautiful picture of God’s love and He gave us a building plan for His design for marriage. If marriage is done right then it is the most wonderful, fulfilling, exciting, loving and joyful experience on earth. It truly can be heaven on earth, but only if it is done God’s way. Just as He gave us a blueprint for marriage, He also said that if we would allow Him, then He would build our marriage. The Lord is a wonderful Master Builder, who does all things well. We will experience His wonder, His love, His glory, His wisdom, His power, His riches and His peace if we let Him build, not only our lives, but our relationships and marriage. He is good and His ways are perfect.

Unless the Lord builds a house, They who build it labor in vain; Psalm 127:1a

Understand the Devastation and Destruction that Comes with No Master Builder

There is such a tendency to think that we “can do it”. That is nothing but pride. We can only do what is right by God’s grace. The Lord is the only One who has done life right and it is only when we come to Him, in humility, will we learn His righteousness, which is “doing life right”. When we do life and marriage right then there will be love, joy and peace. When we don’t do life right then there will not be any peace, quietness or confidence.

Woe to him who builds his house without righteousness, Jeremiah 22:13a

There are so many lies out in the world about marriage. Some people say that there can not be a loving marriage or that people who love each other do not have to get married. They are right, no one has to “get married” but the love will not last. No one has to choose the Lord or walk in His ways. Love is a choice and the Lord does not force anyone to choose Him or to follow His ways. However, the Lord is not mocked. God’s ways are true and He is faithful. If you want life, love and peace then you must follow the One who is life, love and peace and who gives life, love and peace to those who belong to Him. If you listen to lies then you will respond to lies. If you respond to a lie then your response will always be wrong. The first thing you need to do is listen to the truth. The truth can be found in God’s Word. Know the Lord and know His Word. You can learn His Word a little by little and as you do so then you will grow in Him and in His love. You will learn to do what is right and your life will soon take on a much greater meaning and you will find much fulfillment in life. Your life and marriage will be blessed and you will have great joy and much love. You will be blessed and you will be a blessing.

Trust in the Lord with all your heart
And do not lean on your own understanding.
In all your ways acknowledge Him,
And He will make your paths straight.
Do not be wise in your own eyes;
Fear the Lord and turn away from evil. Proverbs 3:5-7

A Life that Is Faithful and Full of Faith

Since there is some unfaithfulness in marriages the question comes up, “What should a wife do if her husband has been unfaithful to her?”. That is an excellent question. What should a wife do? She should be faithful. She should always do what is right. Just because her husband has been unfaithful to his marriage vows it does not mean that she should be unfaithful to her marriage vows. Marriage vows are made to God. They are not made to each other but to God. She should keep her marriage vows to God…to love her husband for better or for worse. Circumstances do not change our vows. Vows to God can not be annulled. A marriage is a permanent oneness and is “until death do us part”. A wife is to stay with her husband and not leave him.

But to the married I give instructions, not I, but the Lord, that the wife should not leave her husband I Corinthians 7:10

It is the Lord that says that she should not leave her husband. The Lord is very much able to deal with her husband. Her husband is not her responsibility. It is her responsibility to be the wife that God designed for her to be and to fulfill her responsibilities to the Lord. She needs to not say anything to her husband, nor should she tell other people what he has done, but rather she is to find a older godly woman who she can talk to and confide in about her situation. The Lord will take care of the wife if she will trust in the Lord even if her husband does not treat her right. Sarah was a beautiful example of this when Abraham was willing for another man to have sexual relations with his wife. Sarah trusted the Lord and the Lord did not allow the man to touch her. A woman’s biggest protection is to be in God’s will and to obey the Lord.

In the same way, you wives, be submissive to your own husbands so that even if any of them are disobedient to the word, they may be won without a word by the behavior of their wives, as they observe your chaste and respectful behavior. Your adornment must not be merely external—braiding the hair, and wearing gold jewelry, or putting on dresses; but let it be the hidden person of the heart, with the imperishable quality of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is precious in the sight of God. For in this way in former times the holy women also, who hoped in God, used to adorn themselves, being submissive to their own husbands; just as Sarah obeyed Abraham, calling him lord, and you have become her children if you do what is right without being frightened by any fear. I Peter 3:1-6

Although it is very painful for the wife when a husband has been unfaithful to his wife, it will be even more painful to disobey the Lord in what He says. John the Baptist got his head cut off because he told King Herod that he had his brother’s wife, and he did not say “ex-wife”. If you were ever married to a person then you are still their wife. If you are married to another man then you are committing adultery. If your husband divorced you and you were not unfaithful to him, then he is also guilty of his adultery and your adultery, of being married to another man. God’s design is for one man to be married to one woman and vice versa. Anything beyond this is adultery, unless one of the spouses have died. It does not matter who counsels you otherwise, there is no justification for remarriage of any kind for a divorced person while their spouse is still living, even if they have not seen their original spouse for years and even if the original spouse has remarried.

For the married woman is bound by law to her husband while he is living; but if her husband dies, she is released from the law concerning the husband. So then, if while her husband is living she is joined to another man, she shall be called an adulteress; but if her husband dies, she is free from the law, so that she is not an adulteress though she is joined to another man. Romans 7:2,3

Faithfulness to the Lord and His ways is not easy. It was not easy for Jesus to be faithful to the Father and go to the cross. However, if anyone wants to follow Jesus then it means following Him in what He says. God’s teaching on marriage is sometimes difficult but it is His way. Even His apostles struggled with it but they all ended up getting married except for Paul, and they were faithful to the Lord even to the point of death.

The disciples *said to Him, “If the relationship of the man with his wife is like this, it is better not to marry.” Matthew 19:10

Adultery only happens when someone has sexual relations other than their spouse. If a woman is unfaithful to her husband then she alone is responsible for her adultery. However, if a man divorces his wife and she remarries then she commits adultery and he is also responsible for her adultery because he divorced her. He also is a divorced man and whoever marries a divorced man commits adultery and the divorced man also commits adultery. This is what this verse is referring to, that the husband becomes responsible also for the adultery of his wife if she remarries. If a woman does not have sexual relations with anyone but her husband then she is not an adulteress. A man can not “make” his wife commit adultery unless she remarries. Whoever marries a divorced woman commits adultery because she is still her original husband’s wife. If a man divorces his wife and marries another woman then he is committing adultery and also bigamy. He now has two wives.

but I say to you that everyone who divorces his wife, except for the reason of unchastity, makes her commit adultery; and whoever marries a divorced woman commits adultery. Matthew 5:32

Everyone who divorces his wife and marries another commits adultery, and he who marries one who is divorced from a husband commits adultery. Luke 16:18

There are no exceptions. And do not say that it was a mistake to marry the original spouse.

When you make a vow to God, do not be late in paying it; for He takes no delight in fools. Pay what you vow! It is better that you should not vow than that you should vow and not pay. Do not let your speech cause you to sin and do not say in the presence of the messenger of God that it was a mistake. Why should God be angry on account of your voice and destroy the work of your hands? Ecclesiastes 5:4-6

A Life that Understands Marriage Needs Foundation

Understand that a Marriage Needs a Solid Foundation

Love and marriage does not just happen but it needs to be built. Just as anything that is built to last must have the right foundation, so it is with love and marriage. If the love relationship in marriage is to last through the storms of life then it must be built on the right foundation. The storms will come and will test the love and the marriage. If the relationship is built on the right foundation then you need not fear. Testing always reveals the weaknesses, so during the storms things might seem sometimes fragile, do not fear, but be faithful and the storm will soon pass.

For no one can lay a foundation other than the one which is laid, which is Jesus Christ. I Corinthians 3:11

Understand You Responsibility In Building Your Marriage

Jesus Christ and His Word is the only foundation that will stand the trials of life. Every marriage will be tried and tested through the storms that come it’s way. If the marriage is built on the Lord then He will cause it to stand. We are weak but He is strong and He is faithful. Read, meditate on and study God’s Word and do according to all that is written in it and then your marriage will be successful. God’s grace is getting up after falling down and not losing our desire or the power to do life right, which is according to God’s Word. Though a Christian may fall, the Lord lifts him up and holds his hand. If you fall or fail, then get back up and do it right. Marriage is humbling but it is a good humbling because when we truly love someone then we want to change. Marriage may reveal how little we love someone else and generally we find that the one we want to love more than our spouse is ourselves. Marriage reveals our selfishness but the Lord wants to make us like Him, who was not selfish at all, but loved to the end. Jesus was faithful to love and to consider others more important than himself.

But each person must be careful how he builds on it. I Corinthians 3:10b

Understand that you are either building your marriage or you are tearing it down. A marriage is built day by day. To build a marriage right then you must be faithful every day to do what is right, even when you do not feel like it. If you build your love and marriage on God’s Word then you will receive great comfort and love the rest of your life. If you do not build it on God’s Word then you will receive much grief and heartache. The Lord gives us everything we need to build our marriage on the right foundation, which is Jesus Christ. He also gives us what we need to build it where it will stand through the storms and be a comfort, support and refuge throughout our lives. Get help from others. Go to women who have a successful marriage and ask them what they have done. The Lord provides older women to help younger women. Ask the Lord to help you. The Lord delights in helping those who want to do it right and who ask Him for help.

The wise woman builds her house, But the foolish tears it down with her own hands. Proverbs 14:1

The only way that a person can have the right foundation in marriage is if they have the right foundation in their own life. If you have not given your life to Jesus Christ, to follow Him and love Him, then you can do that today. He will come into your life and He will start rebuilding your life the way it needs to be. He gives a person not only a new foundation, but a new start. He takes the bad and gives the good. He knows what you need and He will fulfill you and be your Good Shepherd. He loves you and if you will trust Him then He will teach you and lead you in the right way. Not only will your marriage be able to stand but your life will stand through the storms. He will give you peace, joy and great love.

Behold, I stand at the door and knock; if anyone hears My voice and opens the door, I will come in to him and will dine with him, and he with Me. Revelation 3:20