A Life with Love Does Not Change

Love does not change. If it does then it is not love. God is love and He does not change. There are two things that will not change and it is these two things that give us security in this world and security for all eternity. When Adam and Eve sinned God’s love did not change for them. He loved them as much as he had loved them before. It was Adam and Eve who had changed and they could no longer experience God’s love.

“For I, the Lord, do not change; Malachi 3:6a

It was God, the Father and Jesus, the Son of God who said in the beginning, “Let us make man in our image.”

Then God said, “Let Us make man in Our image, according to Our likeness; and let them rule over the fish of the sea and over the birds of the sky and over the cattle and over all the earth, and over every creeping thing that creeps on the earth.” Genesis 1:26

Jesus Christ is God’s only begotten Son, equal with God, the Father, and He does not change.

Jesus Christ is the same yesterday and today and forever. Hebrews 13:8

God’s Word does not change. Those who have put their trust in Jesus Christ have been born again into His family through the living and enduring Word of God. It endures forever and will never change.

for you have been born again not of seed which is perishable but imperishable, that is, through the living and enduring word of God. For, “All flesh is like grass,
And all its glory like the flower of grass.
The grass withers,
And the flower falls off,
But the word of the Lord endures forever.” I Peter 1:23-25a

When God made Adam and Eve, his plan for them was love. He said that if they would keep His commandments then they would live and not die. His plan was for them to live in His love for all eternity. He never designed that they would experience grief, death, guilt, fear, shame, regret, slavery or any of the other horrible consequences of disobeying Him and rejecting living in His love. When they sinned He did not reject them. They rejected God. He still loved them and came up with another provision for them to live in His love. His provision was to be a sacrificial love so that man could “see” how much God loved them. Those who receive this sacrificial love will live forever in God’s love and will never need to hide again.

“Do not let your heart be troubled; believe in God, believe also in Me. In My Father’s house are many dwelling places; if it were not so, I would have told you; for I go to prepare a place for you. If I go and prepare a place for you, I will come again and receive you to Myself, that where I am, there you may be also. John 14:1-3

God loves you and He says that one day He will come back and take those who love Him to the home that He has prepared for them. Jesus Christ said that He would die and rise again from the dead and He did, just as He said. He is risen and and will raise us up also to live forever with Him in His love, just as He says. He is our hope. We do not need to fear. He says that He loves us and God will never lie. We can trust Him and His Word completely. Let not your heart be troubled you who have believed in God and His Word. He is alive and you also will live with Him. God does not change.

A Life with Love Can Be Rejected

Love to the soul is like food for the body. We need it, we long for it if we do not have it and we will do almost anything to get it. This is where many a young person gets into trouble. Looking for love in the wrong places. A price can not be put on love because it is the greatest gift that you can ever receive from another and only a fool exchanges love. God is the source of all love and He offers His love to every single person in the world. The Bible describes the fool as one who rejects God’s love and lives as if there is no God. Adam and Eve rejected God’s love when they chose to live as if there was no God. They disobeyed the God of the universe and thought they knew better than their Creator.

The fool has said in his heart,”There is no God.” They are corrupt, they have committed abominable deeds; Psalm 14:1a

When Adam and Eve rejected God’s love and did not obey the Lord and His command for them they sinned and their hearts became not only foolish but wicked. They received a sinful nature because now they had a sinful heart that was both foolish and wicked.

The wicked, in the haughtiness of his countenance, does not seek Him.
All his thoughts are, “There is no God.” Psalm 10:4

Not only did Adam and Eve not seek the Lord but they hid from Him when they heard the sound of God walking in the garden. The wicked person also will seek to avoid Christians who are living for the Lord. Haughtiness is another word for pride. It is our pride that does not want to need God or seek Him.

They heard the sound of the Lord God walking in the garden in the cool of the day, and the man and his wife hid themselves from the presence of the Lord God among the trees of the garden. Then the Lord God called to the man, and said to him, “Where are you?” He said, “I heard the sound of You in the garden, and I was afraid because I was naked; so I hid myself.” Genesis 3:8-10

Adam and Eve hid themselves because they were ashamed and guilty. When they hid from God they could no longer experience His love for them. His love had not changed but they had changed. Sin does this to us. It changes us and all of our relationships. We become insecure and we not only want to hide from God but we want to cover ourselves up around others. We don’t want to be vulnerable. We have rejected God and His love when we sin and now we are fearful that others will reject us. The most secure people in the world are those who have experienced God’s salvation and live in fellowship with the Lord and obey His commands. They have nothing to fear.

The Lord is my light and my salvation;
Whom shall I fear?
The Lord is the defense of my life;
Whom shall I dread? Psalm 27:1

A Life with Love that Came Again

It was love that came again to earth when God sent His only begotten Son to reconcile men and women to God and the love relationship with God that God planned from the beginning. Jesus Christ came to restore everything that man lost and He gave even more.

For God so loved the world, that He gave His only begotten Son, that whoever believes in Him shall not perish, but have eternal life. John 3:16

God gave, for love gives, and the gift of His Son is available for anyone who wants to be restored to a love relationship with God. He came to die that He might give life to anyone who will believe in Him. Those who believe will never be separated from His love ever again.

For I am convinced that neither death, nor life, nor angels, nor principalities, nor things present, nor things to come, nor powers, nor height, nor depth, nor any other created thing, will be able to separate us from the love of God, which is in Christ Jesus our Lord. Romans 8:38,39

Jesus Christ came to earth through the seed of the woman just as God said He would. He was born of a virgin since He is God, Himself.

Mary said to the angel, “How can this be, since I am a virgin?” The angel answered and said to her, “The Holy Spirit will come upon you, and the power of the Most High will overshadow you; and for that reason the holy Child shall be called the Son of God. Luke 1:34,35

Jesus grew in wisdom and in stature and in favor with God and man.

And Jesus kept increasing in wisdom and stature, and in favor with God and men. Luke 2:52

Jesus was made in the likeness of sinful man so that He could relate to our struggles and temptations and yet, He never sinned. Jesus came as an offering for our sin and as a result sin was condemned in the flesh. There is therefore now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus.

Therefore there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus. For the law of the Spirit of life in Christ Jesus has set you free from the law of sin and of death. For what the Law could not do, weak as it was through the flesh, God did: sending His own Son in the likeness of sinful flesh and as an offering for sin, He condemned sin in the flesh, Romans 8:1-3

Jesus had to learn the Word of God and He had to learn obedience. Jesus Christ was faithful to what God had commanded Him. He took the condemnation that we deserved and so we have been set free from the penalty of death. After He died and rose again, making purification of sins, then He sat down at the right hand of God.

When He had made purification of sins, He sat down at the right hand of the Majesty on high Hebrews 1:3b

If we have received Jesus Christ as our Lord and Savior then we can come to Him, for He is our high priest, who prays for us and delights in our coming to Him. He sits on a throne of grace and gives mercy and grace to those who come to Him.

For we do not have a high priest who cannot sympathize with our weaknesses, but One who has been tempted in all things as we are, yet without sin. Therefore let us draw near with confidence to the throne of grace, so that we may receive mercy and find grace to help in time of need. Hebrews 4:15,16

God made men and women to be in a love relationship with Him. He never reproved them for their failure to keep His commandment but provided a way for them to be restored to the love relationship with Him. Love does not blame. Love finds a way. Love perseveres. Love pursues the relationship. Love gives. Love sacrifices. God did all of this when He sent Jesus Christ to die for the world, that whoever believes in Him, may be restored to the love relationship that God planned from the beginning. He took everything that man lost in the garden and restores those as well. He not only restores the love but He restores the peace and the joy also. He brings healing to our souls and bodies. He heals our relationships that have been broken through sin.

Therefore if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creature; the old things passed away; behold, new things have come. Now all these things are from God, who reconciled us to Himself through Christ II Corinthians 5:17,18a

He is alive today and you will find Him if you seek Him. He is seeking to have a love relationship with you.

For I delivered to you as of first importance what I also received, that Christ died for our sins according to the Scriptures, and that He was buried, and that He was raised on the third day according to the Scriptures, I Corinthians 15:3,4

He loves you!

A Life with Love Is Still the Plan

When Adam and Eve disobeyed the command that the Lord had given them for their own protection there had to be consequences or they would have continued in their rebellion against the Lord. He did not accuse them and He still loved them. The plan had not changed but the way for the plan to become a reality had changed. Adam and Eve had not been faithful and could not be trusted.

Then the Lord God said, “Behold, the man has become like one of Us, knowing good and evil; and now, he might stretch out his hand, and take also from the tree of life, and eat, and live forever”— Genesis 3:23

Now, that Adam and Eve had eaten of the tree of the knowledge of good and evil they MIGHT stretch out their hand again and take also of the tree of life and eat of that one also and then they would live forever in their sin. Death had come into the world but with the death the Lord promised a provision so that they might live again forever with the Lord, never to die again.

The Lord God said to the serpent, “Because you have done this,
Cursed are you more than all cattle,
And more than every beast of the field;
On your belly you will go,
And dust you will eat
All the days of your life;
And I will put enmity
Between you and the woman,
And between your seed and her seed;
He shall bruise you on the head,
And you shall bruise him on the heel.” Genesis 3:14,15

From the very beginning the Lord promised a provision for man, that he might have hope and not despair. The Lord God promised that He would send a Savior who would crush Satan on the head. This Savior that God was promising would be born of the woman. This was God’s love and goodness towards Adam and Eve and all who would be born through them. Sin brings death but God promises life to all who will believe in His provision, His only begotten Son, Jesus Christ.

For God so loved the world, that He gave His only begotten Son, that whoever believes in Him shall not perish, but have eternal life. John 3:16

Those who believe in Jesus Christ have their sin taken away, for He is the Lamb of God, who takes away the sin of the world. This word “sin” is all encompassing of the rebellion that is in all of us of wanting to be our own Lord and not wanting anyone to rule over us. It includes all of the sins that we have committed as a result of wanting to be our own Lord.

The next day he saw Jesus coming to him and said, “Behold, the Lamb of God who takes away the sin of the world! John 1:29

It is not until we repent of wanting to “make our own decisions and run our own lives” will we be able to experience His plan of love for our lives. He does not take away our freedom when we trust Him and turn to Him but for the first time we will experience true freedom.

Jesus answered them, “Truly, truly, I say to you, everyone who commits sin is the slave of sin. The slave does not remain in the house forever; the son does remain forever. So if the Son makes you free, you will be free indeed.

John 8:34-36

You experience true freedom when you repent of your sin and turn to the Lord. He also, becomes your Savior and He saves you from your sins.

She will bear a Son; and you shall call His name Jesus, for He will save His people from their sins.” Matthew 1:21

Have you received the greatest gift of all? The gift of Jesus Christ, God’s only begotten Son, as your Lord and Savior? This gift is offered freely to whoever wants to become His disciple and follow Him in faith and obedience. Love was God’s plan and still is God’s plan but the only way anyone can live in that plan is by becoming God’s child by receiving Jesus Christ into their life.

But as many as received Him, to them He gave the right to become children of God, even to those who believe in His name, John 1:12

The Lord says that “Today is the day of salvation”. Don’t let this day end without knowing for certain that you have a home in heaven with God for all eternity. Whoever calls on Him will be saved.

that if you confess with your mouth Jesus as Lord, and believe in your heart that God raised Him from the dead, you will be saved; for with the heart a person believes, resulting in righteousness, and with the mouth he confesses, resulting in salvation. For the Scripture says, “Whoever believes in Him will not be disappointed.” For there is no distinction between Jew and Greek; for the same Lord is Lord of all, abounding in riches for all who call on Him; for “Whoever will call on the name of the Lord will be saved.” Romans 10:9-13

A Life with Love Makes a Home

We all need a home. A home is different from a house. A home is where you feel loved and secure. A home is where you can go anytime and you are always welcome. It is your home and it was made for you to dwell there. A home offers protection from the world and the elements. The storms of this world, whether emotional or physical, can be cold and seem cruel and relentless at times but if you have a home then you have a shelter. We all long for a place where we feel loved and secure that we can call our home. When Adam and Eve sinned they lost their home. Sin and rebellion sometimes does that to us. The devil lies about or minimizes the consequences of sin and the price that we pay for not obeying the Lord. It probably did not occur to Adam and Eve that they would lose their home.

therefore the Lord God sent him out from the garden of Eden, to cultivate the ground from which he was taken. Genesis 3:23

The Lord had to send them out from the garden, where life was a delight, lest they eat of the tree of life and live forever in their sinful state. Love makes a home for the lonely and the Lord began preparing a place for Adam and Eve, where they would be safe and secure and which would never be taken away from them but that home would come later for those who would put their faith in Jesus Christ.

“Do not let your heart be troubled; believe in God, believe also in Me. In My Father’s house are many dwelling places; if it were not so, I would have told you; for I go to prepare a place for you. If I go and prepare a place for you, I will come again and receive you to Myself, that where I am, there you may be also. John 14:1-3

Adam and Eve still had a choice of whether or not they were going to love God or go their own way and do their own thing. However, because of sin, life becomes harder and Adam’s work was harder because the land had weeds and thistles. Work was no longer the delight that it had been before. He could rebel again, and make it even harder for himself, or he could learn to trust and obey the Lord and God’s help would be available for him even in his difficulty.

Then the Lord God said, “Behold, the man has become like one of Us, knowing good and evil; and now, he might stretch out his hand, and take also from the tree of life, and eat, and live forever”—therefore the Lord God sent him out from the garden of Eden, to cultivate the ground from which he was taken. So He drove the man out; and at the east of the garden of Eden He stationed the cherubim and the flaming sword which turned every direction to guard the way to the tree of life. Genesis 3:22-24

It was God’s love that sent Adam out of the garden. It is God’s love that gives us a home. If we will not rebel against the Lord but learn to trust Him then He makes a home for the lonely.

God makes a home for the lonely;
He leads out the prisoners into prosperity,
Only the rebellious dwell in a parched land. Psalm 68:6

A Life with Love is to Be With

Love is to be with the one whom you love. A person’s presence is one of the greatest gifts that they can give to the one whom they love. The Lord gave Eve to be with Adam.

The man said, “The woman whom You gave to be with me, Genesis 3:12

It is not good for anyone to be alone for very long.

Then the Lord God said, “It is not good for the man to be alone; I will make him a helper suitable for him.” Genesis 2:18a

The Lord made us to be in a relationship with Him and to be in relationship with others. Woe to the person who falls and there is not another to lift him up.

Two are better than one because they have a good return for their labor. For if either of them falls, the one will lift up his companion. But woe to the one who falls when there is not another to lift him up. Furthermore, if two lie down together they keep warm, but how can one be warm alone? And if one can overpower him who is alone, two can resist him. A cord of three strands is not quickly torn apart. Ecclesiastes 4:9-12

A marriage with Jesus Christ as the head of the marriage and family will not quickly or easily be torn apart. One who is married will not stay down when they fall if their partner will life them up through prayer and encouragement. A family that prays together stays together.

And He went up on the mountain and summoned those whom He Himself wanted, and they came to Him. And He appointed twelve, so that they would be with Him and that He could send them out to preach, Mark 3:13,14

Jesus chose His disciples because He wanted them to be with Him. He wanted them to be with Him before they served Him. The Lord made man because He wanted man to be with Him. He did not need man but He loved man and delighted in Him. In a similar way, the Lord made Eve to be with Adam.

The Lord God fashioned into a woman the rib which He had taken from the man, and brought her to the man. Genesis 2:12a

The Lord gives a wife to a man to first be with her husband. Notice that the Lord did not give Eve any job to do other than to respond to her husband. A woman needs to be with her husband and learn to respond to him first and then to love her husband by serving and helping him according to his needs. A man marries a woman because he believes she wants to be with him. A man longs to be wanted just as a woman longs to be loved.

so that they may encourage the young women to love their husbands,Titus 2:4a

The word “love” in this verse means to be with and delight in, in other words, to want her husband. This is the only time in the Bible this particular word is used. It means that the wife is to be a “lover of her husband, in other words, to delight in him”. This is also what the Lord desires in His bride, the church. Jesus Christ wants us to delight ourselves in Him.

Delight yourself in the Lord;
And He will give you the desires of your heart. Psalm 37:4

Even greater is the fact that the Lord delights in His children.

But the blameless in their walk are His delight. Proverbs 11:20b

The Lord loves those who are His and especially delights when they come to Him in prayer.

But the prayer of the upright is His delight. Proverbs 15:8b

Love means to be with the one whom you love. The Lord loves it when we come to Him and delight ourselves in Him. A husband loves it when his wife wants him and even more when she tells him she wants him. A wife loves it when her husband wants to just be with her and listen to her. Children will do almost anything for their parent to be with them. If you love someone then you want to be with them. Jesus Christ came down to earth to be with man so that He could remove the barriers forever so that man could be with God forever.

For Christ also died for sins once for all, the just for the unjust, so that He might bring us to God, I Peter 3:18a

A Life with Love Needs Good Friends

If you want to find love and keep love in your life and in your marriage then you need good friends. You will become like your friends. If you choose good friends then you will do what is good and right. If you spend time with people who compromise and do what is wrong then it is only a matter of time before you will do what is wrong. Love needs to be nurtured and a truly good friend will encourage faithfulness, love and respect in your life, marriage and friendships.

Do not be deceived: “Bad company corrupts good morals.” I Corinthians 15:33

Moral excellence is the root of true love. Love and trust go together and if there is not moral excellence then there will not be true love. Bad friends corrupts good morals. When Adam and Eve sinned the Lord asked them who told them they were naked and had they eaten from the tree of which He told them not to eat.

And He said, “Who told you that you were naked? Have you eaten from the tree of which I commanded you not to eat?” Genesis 3:11

Eve should never have been talking with the serpent. When the serpent questioned whether the Lord had really said something that was evidence enough that he was bad company. The serpent questioning God’s Word engaged Eve in a dialogue of which the serpent would eventually question the consequences of disobeying.

Now the serpent was more crafty than any beast of the field which the Lord God had made. And he said to the woman, “Indeed, has God said, ‘You shall not eat from any tree of the garden’?” Genesis 3:1

The serpent questioned what the Lord said and then he questioned whether anything would happen. He put doubt in Eve’s mind. Someone who doubts God’s Word can not be trusted.

The serpent said to the woman, “You surely will not die! Genesis 3:4

The Lord did say not to eat from the tree and the Lord did indeed say that they would die if they did so. If the Lord says something then He wants us to believe it. It does not matter if no one else believes it. Unbelief leads to disobedience. If you want to grow strong in love and faithful in obedience then you need to have good friends who will point you to the One who is love.

Beloved, let us love one another, for love is from God; and everyone who loves is born of God and knows God. The one who does not love does not know God, for God is love. I John 4:7,8

A true friend will be more concerned about your relationship with the Lord and what is best for you than their friendship with you. They will want what is best for you over what you think of them.

Faithful are the wounds of a friend,
But deceitful are the kisses of an enemy. Proverbs 27:6

We all have a need for friends. If you are a wise and good friend to others then you will attract the same kind of people who will want to have you as a friend. A true friend loves at all times and will protect you from being vulnerable to the wrong kind of people.

A friend loves at all times, Proverbs 17:17a

A wise mother will know her child’s friends. She will ask “who were you with?” and “who told you to do that?”. Other than choosing to follow the Lord the second most important decision is “who” will be your friends. If you want to guard and keep the love in your marriage then you will be very careful who your friends are. Many an adulterous affair has happened with a good friend of the couple. If someone is not faithful to the Lord then they can not be trusted. Also, a husband should never be alone with another woman other than his wife nor should a wife be alone with any other man other than her husband.

Many a man proclaims his own loyalty, But who can find a trustworthy man? Proverbs 20:6

Many a person will proclaim or pretend to be a friend but truly good friends are rare and more precious than anything money can buy. Jesus Christ came to be our friend when He laid down His life for us. Those who choose Him first to be their friend will learn what true friendship is and will recognize a true friend when one comes into their life.

Greater love has no one than this, that one lay down his life for his friends. John 15:13

When you are married then your best friend should be your spouse. Friendship is the union of two souls and the Lord brought Eve along to be Adam’s companion and friend. A great marriage is made up of not only two lovers but two soulmates.

A Life with Love Must Be Together

Love must be together. Love is relational and relationships must be nurtured to grow strong. The Lord brings a man and a woman together in marriage to be with each other. Your marriage will not grow strong and your love will not grow deeper unless there is an investment of your money and your time. These are the treasures that each of us have and when we invest our treasures in the marriage then our heart will be in it also. The love has become cold in many a marriage simply because the relationship was neglected and the two people have drifted apart. Each one invested their time, energy and money elsewhere and their heart was no longer with their spouse.

For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also. Luke 12:34

The more shared experiences then the stronger the marriage. Just as in the past when they used to make a rope strong, it was made of many many little strands of hemp. It was almost impossible to even cut through a thick rope. In the same way, the more shared experiences that married couples have then the stronger the bonds of marriage will be and when the enemy attacks then it will have a much harder time breaking the bonds of marriage. Love grows through sharing each others joys and sorrows.

Be kind to one another, tender-hearted, forgiving each other, just as God in Christ also has forgiven you. Therefore be imitators of God, as beloved children; and walk in love, just as Christ also loved you and gave Himself up for us, an offering and a sacrifice to God as a fragrant aroma. Ephesians 4:32-5:2

Your marriage and love will deepen as you each learn to be kind to one another, tender hearted, forgiving each other just as Christ also has forgiven us. As you and your spouse learn to walk in love and to consider the other one more important than one’s ownself then your marriage will be a fragrant aroma to the Lord and to the world.

Marriage is to be held in honor among all, and the marriage bed is to be undefiled; Hebrews 13:4a

As you can see, it says marriage bed, not marriage beds. A marriage will not grow strong if each of the married partners sleep in a different bed. Don’t do it. The Lord will help you if one of you has a hard time sleeping. There is something about sharing the same bed that keeps a couple together.

So they are no longer two, but one flesh. What therefore God has joined together, let no man separate. Matthew 19:6

Separation is opposite of being together. The devil tries first to separate a married couple and then divorce is often next. If someone counsels you to separate then they are not with God but against God. Let no man separate, means let no man counsel you to separate nor let another come in between you and your spouse. A woman should never confide in any other man other than her husband. She should not go to a pastor or a male counselor to get marriage help. A woman can almost always get a man’s sympathy and a man can not see through a woman’s tears, hurts, etc. and give her the truth of what she needs to hear.

The first to plead his case seems right,
Until another comes and examines him. Proverbs 18:17

A man can not see through a woman and a woman can not see through a man. In the same way, a man should not go to a woman for counsel. Older men can help a younger man to learn to love his wife and to understand her and older women are God’s provision to help women in learning how to love and respect their husband.

A Life with Love Has An Enemy

Love has an enemy that wants to destroy it and the people in the relationship where love is. God is love and there will only be true love where God is but there is one who hates God and he will do everything he can to destroy what the Lord establishes. The Lord is the One who brings people together in marriage.

And He answered and said, “Have you not read that He who created them from the beginning made them male and female, and said, ‘For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh’? So they are no longer two, but one flesh. What therefore God has joined together, let no man separate.” Matthew 19:4-6

The Lord made the marriage to be between male and a female. He joins them together and they become one flesh. They are no longer two but one. The Lord’s blueprint for marriage is that the two people are to stay married until one of them dies and then the length of the marriage has been completed. However, the devil hates what God has ordained and he tries to destroy the love, the marriage and the people in the marriage. The enemy of love is not flesh and blood but it is spiritual forces.

Finally, be strong in the Lord and in the strength of His might. Put on the full armor of God, so that you will be able to stand firm against the schemes of the devil. For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the powers, against the world forces of this darkness, against the spiritual forces of wickedness in the heavenly places. Ephesians 6:10-12

Struggles will come in any marriage but if you recognize who the real enemy is then you can stand firm together and resist him.

Submit therefore to God. Resist the devil and he will flee from you. James 4:7

As both of you, or even if one of you, will recognize the real enemy then you can resist him and he will flee. You must be strong in the Lord and you resist him through submitting to God and in the strength of God’s might. He will have to flee.

But one whom you forgive anything, I forgive also; for indeed what I have forgiven, if I have forgiven anything, I did it for your sakes in the presence of Christ, so that no advantage would be taken of us by Satan, for we are not ignorant of his schemes. II Corinthians 2:10,11

Do not be ignorant of his schemes. He wants one of you to harbor unforgiveness in your heart. We all wrong each other and hurt each other, and often we are not even aware of it. If you will learn to forgive quickly then that keeps Satan from getting a foothold in the marriage. The Bible says that he is “an accuser of the brethren”. He wants to accuse each one of you to the other. He might say, something like, “If he really loved you then he would not do that.” Not so, for a man often does not know what will hurt his wife. He has to learn to live with her in an understanding way. It does not come naturally.

You husbands in the same way, live with your wives in an understanding way,

I peter 3:7

In the same way, a wife needs to learn how to respect her husband and love him the way that God designed. It is different from the way a wife “wants” to be loved. She will often love him the way she wants to be loved and the man will do the same. The older women are instructed to teach the younger women how to love their husbands.

so that they may encourage the young women to love their husbands, to love their children, to be sensible, pure, workers at home, kind, being subject to their own husbands, so that the word of God will not be dishonored. Titus 2:4,5

This word love in “to love their husbands” means that they are to want their husbands. A man marries a woman because he thinks that she wants him. If she does not communicate this after marriage then he will feel rejected.

Nevertheless, each individual among you also is to love his own wife even as himself, and the wife must see that she respects her husband. Ephesians 5:33

The devil will do what he can to get the man to not love his wife and to get the woman to not respect her husband. It takes two to destroy a relationship. A marriage is only dysfunctional if both people are not doing what the Lord called them to do. If only one person is disobedient then that person is dysfunctional and the obedience of their partner will help them become the wife or husband that the Lord called them to be.

In the same way, you wives, be submissive to your own husbands so that even if any of them are disobedient to the word, they may be won without a word by the behavior of their wives, as they observe your chaste and respectful behavior. I Peter 3:1,2

Marriage relationships are work but when they work the way the Lord designed then they are the sweetest relationships on earth. They are a taste of heaven to the marriage partners and they are salt and light to the rest of the world. When each partner does the work that God has called them to do and be the spouse that God designed them to be then God is glorified.

I glorified You on the earth, having accomplished the work which You have given Me to do. John 17:4

A Life with Love Can Be Lost

When Adam and Eve ate of the tree of the knowledge of good and evil the Lord said that they would die. The Bible says that the sin brings death. Man earned death when he sinned.

For the wages of sin is death, Romans 6:23a

The death that man experiences is first in his spirit. Man becomes separated from God spiritually. The spirit is what God made to commune with God. God is Spirit and those who know Him communicate in a spiritual way with God. They worship Him in spirit, they pray or talk with Him through their spirit and He speaks to them through their spirit. Man is the only spiritual creation that God made and separates man from the rest of all creation. When God made man in His image part of that was that God made man spiritual, to know Him and to be in a relationship with Him. That love relationship was lost when man sinned.

God is spirit, and those who worship Him must worship in spirit and truth.” John 4:24

The death that man next feels is the death to his soul. This death brings the shame of evil and the knowledge of the good that they have lost. One of the aspects of the meaning of good is the highest form of love and so when we sin then we lose experiencing and feeling love from the One whom we have sinned against. The relationship is no longer the same until it is restored. The love has been lost. God still loved man when he sinned but man no longer felt that love. It was lost to him. The soul is made up of the mind, will and emotions. Death to the soul brings the knowledge of the good thing that we had and we lost through our own foolish actions. It is that sick feeling of regret that we feel after we sin. Also, because we have sinned now our will has become a slave of sin and we sin again in the same manner even though with our mind we know it is not good.

Jesus answered them, “Truly, truly, I say to you, everyone who commits sin is the slave of sin. John 8:34

The last death that we will experience will be death to our body. This death is the destruction that we bring to ourselves through our sin. When we sin we lose the healthy love that we should have to take care of our own body. If Adam and Eve had not sinned then they would have never died. They would have been able to live forever in the presence of God and experienced the delight and joy of being in the garden with Him. We have all inherited the death that Adam brought to us when he sinned. Sickness and death is a part of the curse that came when man rebelled against God by not obeying Him.

Therefore, just as through one man sin entered into the world, and death through sin, and so death spread to all men, because all sinned— Romans 5:12

So, when man sinned he not only came into the knowledge of evil and lost his innocence and experienced shame but he also came into the knowledge of good. This knowledge of good is what revealed the darkness and sickness of sin and with it came great fear. The knowledge of good that man had now lost was the experiential knowledge of the love, the peace and the incredible joy and delight of a perfect relationship with God and the rest of creation. This knowledge of good brought the torment that one feels knowing what they have lost. One does not miss what one has never known. The knowledge of evil takes away the innocence of trust, of true love, of believing the best and of not fearing. Man lost everything pertaining to life when he ate of the tree of the knowledge of good and evil but most importantly he lost the delight of living in and experiencing God’s perfect love every second of every day. Adam and Eve also lost the perfect love that they had for each other and with it the trust and innocence in their marriage.

There is no fear in love; but perfect love casts out fear, I John 4:18a