#Family – Page 40 – Instructions To A Young Life

A Life with Love Has An Enemy

Love has an enemy that wants to destroy it and the people in the relationship where love is. God is love and there will only be true love where God is but there is one who hates God and he will do everything he can to destroy what the Lord establishes. The Lord is the One who brings people together in marriage.

And He answered and said, “Have you not read that He who created them from the beginning made them male and female, and said, ‘For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh’? So they are no longer two, but one flesh. What therefore God has joined together, let no man separate.” Matthew 19:4-6

The Lord made the marriage to be between male and a female. He joins them together and they become one flesh. They are no longer two but one. The Lord’s blueprint for marriage is that the two people are to stay married until one of them dies and then the length of the marriage has been completed. However, the devil hates what God has ordained and he tries to destroy the love, the marriage and the people in the marriage. The enemy of love is not flesh and blood but it is spiritual forces.

Finally, be strong in the Lord and in the strength of His might. Put on the full armor of God, so that you will be able to stand firm against the schemes of the devil. For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the powers, against the world forces of this darkness, against the spiritual forces of wickedness in the heavenly places. Ephesians 6:10-12

Struggles will come in any marriage but if you recognize who the real enemy is then you can stand firm together and resist him.

Submit therefore to God. Resist the devil and he will flee from you. James 4:7

As both of you, or even if one of you, will recognize the real enemy then you can resist him and he will flee. You must be strong in the Lord and you resist him through submitting to God and in the strength of God’s might. He will have to flee.

But one whom you forgive anything, I forgive also; for indeed what I have forgiven, if I have forgiven anything, I did it for your sakes in the presence of Christ, so that no advantage would be taken of us by Satan, for we are not ignorant of his schemes. II Corinthians 2:10,11

Do not be ignorant of his schemes. He wants one of you to harbor unforgiveness in your heart. We all wrong each other and hurt each other, and often we are not even aware of it. If you will learn to forgive quickly then that keeps Satan from getting a foothold in the marriage. The Bible says that he is “an accuser of the brethren”. He wants to accuse each one of you to the other. He might say, something like, “If he really loved you then he would not do that.” Not so, for a man often does not know what will hurt his wife. He has to learn to live with her in an understanding way. It does not come naturally.

You husbands in the same way, live with your wives in an understanding way,

I peter 3:7

In the same way, a wife needs to learn how to respect her husband and love him the way that God designed. It is different from the way a wife “wants” to be loved. She will often love him the way she wants to be loved and the man will do the same. The older women are instructed to teach the younger women how to love their husbands.

so that they may encourage the young women to love their husbands, to love their children, to be sensible, pure, workers at home, kind, being subject to their own husbands, so that the word of God will not be dishonored. Titus 2:4,5

This word love in “to love their husbands” means that they are to want their husbands. A man marries a woman because he thinks that she wants him. If she does not communicate this after marriage then he will feel rejected.

Nevertheless, each individual among you also is to love his own wife even as himself, and the wife must see that she respects her husband. Ephesians 5:33

The devil will do what he can to get the man to not love his wife and to get the woman to not respect her husband. It takes two to destroy a relationship. A marriage is only dysfunctional if both people are not doing what the Lord called them to do. If only one person is disobedient then that person is dysfunctional and the obedience of their partner will help them become the wife or husband that the Lord called them to be.

In the same way, you wives, be submissive to your own husbands so that even if any of them are disobedient to the word, they may be won without a word by the behavior of their wives, as they observe your chaste and respectful behavior. I Peter 3:1,2

Marriage relationships are work but when they work the way the Lord designed then they are the sweetest relationships on earth. They are a taste of heaven to the marriage partners and they are salt and light to the rest of the world. When each partner does the work that God has called them to do and be the spouse that God designed them to be then God is glorified.

I glorified You on the earth, having accomplished the work which You have given Me to do. John 17:4

A Life with Love Can Be Misdirected

The heart is where the soul abides and where the seed of love is born and grows in people. The heart is our innermost being where we long for intimacy, that is, to know and to be known. The heart is where we are vulnerable and what we guard, for when we give our heart away then we give a part of us away as well.

Watch over your heart with all diligence, For from it flow the springs of life. Proverbs 4:23

It is in our heart that our deepest longings and desires are. In the secret places of our heart are our dreams and plans that we long to see fulfilled in our lives.

A plan in the heart of a man is like deep water,
But a man of understanding draws it out. Proverbs 20:5

A good friend or a good wife with understanding knows how to draw the plans out of their friend or spouse and encourage them to become the person they were designed to be and do the plans in their heart that they dream of doing. However, a good friend or good wife will also see when their friend or spouse’s heart is getting misdirected. Eve’s heart was misdirected when she started loving and desiring things that the Lord did not have for her. She exchanged the love of God for the love of the world.

Do not love the world nor the things in the world. If anyone loves the world, the love of the Father is not in him. For all that is in the world, the lust of the flesh and the lust of the eyes and the boastful pride of life, is not from the Father, but is from the world. The world is passing away, and also its lusts; but the one who does the will of God lives forever. I John 2:15-17

Eve’s heart started to be misdirected to temporal things that will not satisfy rather than listen to the Lord and choose to do what is right by doing His will, which will always bring satisfaction and much gladness. One of the meanings of righteousness is “doing what is right in God’s eyes”. Lawlessness is ignoring or neglecting God’s laws, principles, commands and truths and doing what you want to do. It will bring much sorrow. Jesus was the happiest man on earth because He loved righteousness and did what was right in God’s eyes.

“You have loved righteousness and hated lawlessness;
Therefore God, Your God, has anointed You
With the oil of gladness above Your companions.” Hebrews 1:9

So, even though the fruit seemed good to Eve it was not good. It was not right for her to do what the Lord had told them not to do. Not only did Eve no longer have the love of God in her but because her heart was misdirected she loved the world and was no longer happy. Sin only offers a passing pleasure which soon fades away. The sinner spends his life chasing the passing pleasures of sin he experiences for a moment but it is only an illusion. It will never satisfy.

By faith Moses, when he had grown up, refused to be called the son of Pharaoh’s daughter, choosing rather to endure ill-treatment with the people of God than to enjoy the passing pleasures of sin, Hebrews 11:24,25

Sadness came into the world through Adam and Eve’s sin and happiness was no longer there. It is only through being restored to a love relationship with God will we love righteousness and be genuinely happy. The Lord truly takes away our sin and our guilt and fills our heart with joy and happiness so much so that we want to joyfully sing of the Lord, His great love and His righteousness.

A Life with Love is Full of Faith

Love is faithful or, in other words, “full of faith” in the One who loves. If there is not faithfulness then there is not love. Eve was not faithful to the Lord when she ate the fruit. She no longer loved God.

When the woman saw that the tree was good for food, and that it was a delight to the eyes, and that the tree was desirable to make one wise, she took from its fruit and ate; Genesis 3:6a

Faithfulness is what the Lord looks for in those who serve Him because He knows that if they are not faithful then they do not love Him. If love is not your motive then whatever you do is going to be for selfish reasons even though it may “look” good to others. If you love God then you will love others. If you are faithful to God then you will be faithful to those to whom you are committed.

His master said to him, ‘Well done, good and faithful slave. You were faithful with a few things, I will put you in charge of many things; enter into the joy of your master.’ Matthew 25:23

Someone may well say that it does not matter what they do because God is going to do what He wants to do regardless. The Lord certainly can and does do what He wants to do but those who have that attitude are not faithful. Faithful means that we are full of faith and believe what He says and we do what He commands. Faith is what pleases the Lord and when we believe Him in faith and act on what He says it brings Him delight.

And without faith it is impossible to please Him, for he who comes to God must believe that He is and He is a rewarder of those who seek Him. Hebrews 11:6

Eve sinned because she did not act in faith on what the Lord had said and commanded them. She began reasoning in her heart about what was best for her rather than trusting what God had said.

and whatever is not from faith is sin. Romans 14:23b

The outcome of Eve not having faith and believing what God said was that she disobeyed God. She did what she wanted, what seemed good to her and what was delightful. It really did not matter what benefits the fruit had to offer because the Lord said not to do it. When you start reasoning in your heart then you have already started down the path of sinning.

There is no wisdom and no understanding
And no counsel against the Lord. Proverbs 21:30

Eve exchanged the truth of God for a lie and the outcome was sin. Every time we sin we also have exchanged the truth of God for a lie. We have believed the lies of the devil rather than the truth of God. The devil uses only one weapon to get us to sin and that is lies. Often we are deceived and do not realize it until it is too late and our resulting sin brings us death to our soul, in the form of grief, sorrow, guilt, regret and much pain. It also brings consequences in relationships and marriages. We were deceived and sinned because we listened to the lies of the devil rather than to the Lord.

He was a murderer from the beginning, and does not stand in the truth because there is no truth in him. Whenever he speaks a lie, he speaks from his own nature, for he is a liar and the father of lies. John 8:44

The only way that we will ever have the life that the Lord designed for us and the loving marriage and relationships that He intended is if we know God’s Word and if we are faithful to Him by believing what He says and obeying it.

And to whom did He swear that they would not enter His rest, but to those who were disobedient? So we see that they were not able to enter because of unbelief. Hebrews 3:18,19

Faith and obedience go together. You can not have one without the other. The Lord has a rest for us and it is heaven. Those who have believed and their faith is a living faith expressed through obedience will enter into heaven because they have believed on the One and Only Son of God, Jesus Christ.

A Life with Love Does Not Manipulate

Since Adam named the serpent then he knew the character of the serpent. The serpent was more crafty than any beast of the field. His name “serpent” means “to enchant”. The devil chose to disguise himself in the serpent because the serpent was enchanting and beautiful.

Now the serpent was more crafty than any beast of the field which the Lord God had made. And he said to the woman, “Indeed, has God said, ‘You shall not eat from any tree of the garden’?” The woman said to the serpent, “From the fruit of the trees of the garden we may eat; but from the fruit of the tree which is in the middle of the garden, God has said, ‘You shall not eat from it or touch it, or you will die.’” The serpent said to the woman, “You surely will not die! Genesis 3:1-4

When we are not trusting the Lord and His love for us then we want to be in control, thinking that we know better than the Lord and can not really trust Him with what is most important to us. We feel the need to “take matters into our own hands” to accomplish what we think would be best for us. Manipulation is not of the Lord and is neither loving nor respectful of another. It is our sinful nature that teaches us to manipulate and it can begin at an early age. A man may seek to manipulate through charm, money, power, words or actions. A man may also seek to manipulate a female through trying to make her feel sorry for him. A female should run from a man who is a manipulator just as a man should avoid a female who manipulates. Females can also manipulate through being enchanting or charming, through their beauty, tears, words or actions. It is not godlike but is more like the devil. Someone who is a manipulator can not be trusted.

When you sit down to dine with a ruler,
Consider carefully what is before you,
And put a knife to your throat
If you are a man of great appetite.
Do not desire his delicacies,
For it is deceptive food. Proverbs 23:1-3

It is only one who trusts the Lord who can be trusted. Don’t listen to what a person says but look at the fruit of their life. If they are trusting the Lord then the fruit will reveal what the person is like.

For each tree is known by its own fruit. For men do not gather figs from thorns, nor do they pick grapes from a briar bush. Luke 6:44

If you want a loving marriage and a godly life then you must learn to trust the Lord to give you what you need and to not manipulate to get what you want. He knows your needs and your desires. Learn to do what is right and to walk uprightly with Him and He will not withhold any good thing from you. Then and only then you will know that the partner that he gives to you in marriage is a gift from Him and not something that you brought about by your manipulation.

No good thing does He withhold from those who walk uprightly. Psalm 84:11b

This is important because in marriage, just as in life, storms will arise and you need to know without a doubt that it was the Lord that brought you two together. If you have that confidence then you will be able to weather the storms together and they will strengthen your marriage rather than weaken it. Trusting the Lord is doing it right. When you do life right then there will be peace, quietness and confidence. Manipulation is doing it wrong. When you do life wrong there will be doubt, stress and problems.

And the work of righteousness will be peace,
And the service of righteousness, quietness and confidence forever.

Isaiah 32:17

A Life with Love Does Not Tempt

Love does not tempt someone to do what is not right in the eyes of the Lord. The Bibles says that it is wrong for a man to look on a woman with lust for her.

“You have heard that it was said, ‘You shall not commit adultery’; but I say to you that everyone who looks at a woman with lust for her has already committed adultery with her in his heart. Matthew 5:27,28

Since the Lord says that it is sin for a man to look at a woman with lust then it is also wrong for a female to stir up lustful desires in a man that can not be fulfilled righteously. This stirring up of his flesh can be done by the way she dresses, the way she acts or the words that she says. Just as it is not loving for a man to lust after a woman neither is it loving for a woman to tempt a man to lust after her. God is love and God does not tempt people.

Let no one say when he is tempted, “I am being tempted by God”; for God cannot be tempted by evil, and He Himself does not tempt anyone. James 1:13

Satan tempts people to sin just as he sought to tempt Eve in the garden to sin. When a person tempts another person to do wrong then they are acting like the devil who seeks only to destroy.

The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I came that they may have life, and have it abundantly. John 10:10

Jesus Christ came to give life but Satan comes to bring death and destruction and he does it by tempting people to sin. Sin brings death spiritually, death to the soul and death to the body. After the death that sin brings there is guilt and after guilt there is judgment.

And inasmuch as it is appointed for men to die once and after this comes judgment, Hebrews 9:27

When a female tempts a man to look on her flesh in an inappropriate manner then she is seeking his death and destruction. She may think that he is giving her attention but just as her desire is selfish toward him, in the same way, his desire is selfish toward her. Love and selfishness are opposites and a man who is selfish will never be able to love a woman the way she longs to be loved. Also, a woman who can control a man by appealing to his flesh will never respect him the way a man longs to be respected. It is a “lose, lose” situation for both the man and the woman.

But each one is tempted when he is carried away and enticed by his own lust. Then when lust has conceived, it gives birth to sin; and when sin is accomplished, it brings forth death. James 1:14-16

Rather, a godly woman will be one who seeks to point a man to the Lord Jesus Christ. Her mind will be set on spiritual things rather than things of the flesh. She will bring life and peace to a man.

For the mind set on the flesh is death, but the mind set on the Spirit is life and peace, Romans 8:6

A man who finds a wife who is godly finds a good thing and obtains favor from the Lord.

He who finds a wife finds a good thing And obtains favor from the Lord. Proverbs 18:22

He will be blessed all of the days of her life. She will be faithful to him and will seek his good.

An excellent wife, who can find?
For her worth is far above jewels.
The heart of her husband trusts in her,
And he will have no lack of gain.
She does him good and not evil
All the days of her life. Proverbs 31:10-12

A Life with Love Must Have Truth

Love must have the truth. If there are lies then there is not love nor will there be love. Love and lies can not abide in the same person. Where there is love there must be truth.

Jesus said to him, “I am the way, and the truth, and the life; no one comes to the Father but through Me. John 14:6

God is love and God is truth. The only way that someone can have love in their life and know the truth is to have God in their life. No one can have God in their life apart from Jesus Christ for He is God’s only begotten Son and equal to God the Father. For this reason, no one can come to God, the Father, except through Jesus Christ, His Son.

Your word is truth. John 17:17b

You must know God’s Word to know the truth. When you know the truth then you will not be deceived and will be able to identify the lies and schemes of the devil. You also will not add to God’s Word for you will know what it says. Eve added to what the Lord had commanded them. He only said “not to eat of the tree of good and evil”. He did not say anything about touching the tree. Eve added those words to God’s words. The Lord gives us the grace to keep His Words but not the words that we add to His Words. He does not want us to add to what He has said.

The woman said to the serpent, “From the fruit of the trees of the garden we may eat; but from the fruit of the tree which is in the middle of the garden, God has said, ‘You shall not eat from it or touch it, or you will die.’” Genesis 3:2,3

We are to know the truth of God’s Word so that we can resist the devil, identify his lies and also so that we will not distort the Word of God to our own destruction.

in which are some things hard to understand, which the untaught and unstable distort, as they do also the rest of the Scriptures, to their own destruction.

II Peter 3:16b

If you want the life that the Lord intended for you and the marriage that He planned then you must know God’s Word. His Word is the blueprint and the instructions on how to experience God’s love and plan for your life. His Word will allow you to grow in the grace and knowledge of Him. Incline your ear to God’s Word rather than what the rest of the world is saying. Keep them in the midst of your heart and do not let them depart from your sight. God’s Words are life to those who find them and health not only to their bodies but to their relationships also.

My son, give attention to my words;
Incline your ear to my sayings.
Do not let them depart from your sight;
Keep them in the midst of your heart.
For they are life to those who find them
And health to all their body. Proverbs 4:20-22

A Life with Love Can Be Stolen

Love is a gift that the Lord gives. He wants every married couple to discover His gift of love and to keep it. When a man and a woman get married they both have great intentions to love one another and yet not all who find love end up keeping the deep and abiding love that can last a lifetime that the Lord planned for them. Many married couples either split up or end up existing together but few have a greater love for each other at the end of their lives together than they did at the beginning of their marriage.

The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I came that they may have life, and have it abundantly. John 10:10

God’s purpose for mankind was that they would experience and live life to the fullest. The Lord wanted life to overflow for men and women. However, just as the Lord gave Adam and Eve a choice when He created them, that they could choose life or death, so also there was one who did not want them to have the life that the Lord planned for them. The serpent, who was the devil in disguise, wanted Adam and Eve to choose death. He could not make them eat from the tree of the knowledge of good and evil so he had to find another way to get them to disobey God. He had to put doubt in their minds so that they might begin to question God and doubt His wisdom and love. However, since Adam had named the serpent, he may have been more familiar with his craftiness so the serpent came to Eve.

“Indeed”, he said, “has God said?” It was almost as though the serpent was saying, “Has God really said this?” The serpent focused on what they could not do. The Lord said that they could eat from any tree but the tree of the knowledge of good and evil. One of his schemes is that he will point out what you are not to do, as though the Lord is depriving you from something good. The devil is a liar and a thief and he comes only to do you harm and to cause you grief. The word “evil” means to cause grief and his name is the “evil one”.

The Lord tells us to resist the devil and he will flee. We are not to engage in conversation with him for he is a liar.

Submit therefore to God. Resist the devil and he will flee from you. James 4:7

If only…Eve had submitted to what the Lord had said and resisted the devil. How many “if only’s” do you have in your life? Regret is death to the soul and is the consequence of “if only I had…”. The fewer regrets you have in your life the happier you will be. Death to the soul comes from not submitting to the Lord and not doing exactly as He says to do. If you want love in your relationships and marriage and to experience life to the fullest then you must learn to submit to God and resist the devil.

Then Jesus was led up by the Spirit into the wilderness to be tempted by the devil. And after He had fasted forty days and forty nights, He then became hungry. And the tempter came and said to Him, “If You are the Son of God, command that these stones become bread.” But He answered and said, “It is written, ‘Man shall not live on bread alone, but on every word that proceeds out of the mouth of God.’” Matthew 4:1-4

The way that we resist the devil is to quote the Word of God. The devil tried to tempt Jesus to get Him to do something that was not the Father’s plan for Him but the only correct answer is “It is written…”. Jesus submitted to the Father’s will and resisted the devil. Jesus had no regrets and God’s love for the world could not be stolen by compromise.

For God so loved the world, that He gave His only begotten Son, that whoever believes in Him shall not perish, but have eternal life. John 3:16

It was because of Eve’s “if only…” that began the greatest love story ever known and that is the story of God’s redeeming love for the world by sending His Son to take the disgrace and punishment that Adam and Eve and the rest of us deserved. Jesus was faithful and obeyed the Father completely and in doing so restored the love relationship that was stolen and brought redemption to mankind. It is for this reason that He is what history is all about for history is really “His story”.

A Life with Love as Life

As long as Adam kept the commandment of God then he would live and he would be able to experience love and give love. The moment that he would disobey God then he would die.

The Lord God commanded the man, saying, “From any tree of the garden you may eat freely; but from the tree of the knowledge of good and evil you shall not eat, for in the day that you eat from it you will surely die.” Genesis 2:16,17

When Adam disobeyed God and experienced death then he began to abide in death rather than to abide in life. When death abides then love also dies.

We know that we have passed out of death into life, because we love the brethren. He who does not love abides in death. I John 3:14

God is life and in Him is no death. He who has God has life and he who does not have God abides in death.

And the testimony is this, that God has given us eternal life, and this life is in His Son. He who has the Son has the life; he who does not have the Son of God does not have the life. I John 5:11,12

Apart from God we only exist and abide in death. God made us to be in a love relationship with Himself but He gave us the freedom to choose. We could choose to be in that relationship with Him and abide in life and His love or we could go our own way and abide in death. Love is a choice, a commitment, a gift and is life. When we choose God and commit our lives to Him then we receive the gift of love and life and we are able to give love and share life with someone else. When we choose to disobey God and go our own way then we abide in death and we are not able to experience life or God’s love. We exist in a lonely world with little meaning other than getting through to the next day. We may think we love but it is only a shadow of the real thing. Often it is a “I love you because…”. It may be duty or survival or even a mutual friendship love with someone else but once the duty or benefit to self is over then the love fades.

Beloved, let us love one another, for love is from God; and everyone who loves is born of God and knows God. I John 4:7

The conditional love that is in the world can not compare to the unconditional love that the Lord shows and gives to those who know Him. The source of God’s love is God Himself and when He comes to live within someone then He fills them with His love and it is His love that He gives to them to give to others. This is the kind of love that makes a marriage sweet and strong. Not only does this kind of love make a marriage strong but it is the only kind of love that can make a friendship or familial relationship sweet and strong. He who has this kind of love truly lives and is able to give love to others.

A Life with Love is Vulnerable

Love makes us vulnerable because it sets us up for the possibility of rejection. However, vulnerability is a part of the marriage relationship and the fulfillment in marriage comes when there is love and total acceptance in the relationship. This is how God loves and this kind of mutual love in marriage can not be found anywhere else but in Him. It is His design and when we live according to His design then we will praise Him and thank Him for His wisdom, His kindness, His perfection and His amazing plan for us.

And the man and his wife were both naked and were not ashamed.

Genesis 2:25

If you want the kind of love that the Lord planned for your marriage then you must begin before marriage to follow His instructions. Every reference in the Bible to nakedness refers to shame except for the nakedness in marriage and the nakedness of babies and older people when they are helpless and dying.

He said, “Naked I came from my mother’s womb,
And naked I shall return there.
The Lord gave and the Lord has taken away.
Blessed be the name of the Lord.” Job 1:21

When you are naked without the protection of the marriage covenant then you open yourself up for your shame to be exposed and to be rejected by another.

“Your nakedness will be uncovered,
Your shame also will be exposed; Isaiah 47:3

Those who would have honored you will be tempted to despise you once they see your nakedness. Once you realize that you are no longer honored as you once were or should be honored then you, yourself will groan within and struggle with the lack of respect.

All who honored her despise her Because they have seen her nakedness; Even she herself groans and turns away. Lamentations 1:8

It is not love for a man to look on a woman in her nakedness unless he is married to her. Marriage is a commitment to love unconditionally the other and if he wants to see her nakedness before marriage then he is not loving her before marriage and will not love her after marriage. The Bible says that the eyes of man are never satisfied and he will not be satisfied for very long by what he sees before marriage if he sees a woman in her nakedness. If a woman allows a man to see her in her nakedness before marriage then she has exposed herself to her own shame and destruction.

Nor are the eyes of man ever satisfied. Proverbs 27:20b

Amnon thought he “loved” Tamar but he did not love Tamar, he lusted after Tamar. He wanted Tamar in her nakedness and wanted to lie with her. After he got what he wanted then he despised her. His hatred of her was greater than his “love” for her.

When she brought them to him to eat, he took hold of her and said to her, “Come, lie with me, my sister.” But she answered him, “No, my brother, do not violate me, for such a thing is not done in Israel; do not do this disgraceful thing! As for me, where could I get rid of my reproach? And as for you, you will be like one of the fools in Israel. Now therefore, please speak to the king, for he will not withhold me from you.” However, he would not listen to her; since he was stronger than she, he violated her and lay with her. Then Amnon hated her with a very great hatred; for the hatred with which he hated her was greater than the love with which he had loved her. And Amnon said to her, “Get up, go away!” II Samuel 13:11-15

It is disgraceful for a man and woman to be physically intimate before marriage. It is foolish for the man and he violates the woman and brings disgrace to her. The fulfillment of a man’s lust sows the seeds for the death of love and respect in a marriage. It is only a matter of time before the seed grows and produces the bad fruit of distrust and disrespect. If he does not marry the girl that he has violated then he is adding sin to sin. God is not mocked and it is only a matter of time before he will start reaping the consequences of his actions.

But she said to him, “No, because this wrong in sending me away is greater than the other that you have done to me!” Yet he would not listen to her. Then he called his young man who attended him and said, “Now throw this woman out of my presence, and lock the door behind her.” II Samuel 13:16,17

If you want the kind of love in your marriage that the Lord designed then you must learn His ways and do them. His love for you is perfect and His ways are perfect. His plan for you is love, for you to love and to be loved unconditonally. This is the way He loves and it is a love that accepts, protects, cherishes and lifts up each spouse to a higher lever of intimacy than they ever dreamed. This is the vulnerability in marriage that every married person longs for, to be loved for exactly who we are without the fear of rejection.

There is no fear in love; but perfect love casts out fear, I John 4:18

A Life with Love Must Have a Builder

Adam and Eve needed the Lord and they needed Him to instruct them and to show them how to do life. The sooner that we realize that we are the clay and that the Lord is the Potter then the happier and stronger our lives and marriages will be.

But now, O Lord, You are our Father,
We are the clay, and You our potter;
And all of us are the work of Your hand. Isaiah 64:8

We are the work of God’s hands and He made us in love and His plan for our lives is to be loved and to love. This is why He calls us His “beloved”, because He wants us to be loved by Him. We belong to Him and that means that we are to “be longing” for Him. He longs to love us and how blessed are those who long for Him and His love.

Therefore the Lord longs to be gracious to you,
And therefore He waits on high to have compassion on you.
For the Lord is a God of justice;
How blessed are all those who long for Him. Isaiah 30:18

As you yield to the Potter and allow Him who made you to build your life, relationships and marriage then you will thrive. He knows exactly what is perfect for you and He loves you perfectly. Your labor will be in vain until you come to the place in your life of surrender to Him and allow Him to be your Lord and Savior.

Unless the Lord builds the house,
They labor in vain who build it;
Unless the Lord guards the city,
The watchman keeps awake in vain.
It is vain for you to rise up early,
To retire late,
To eat the bread of painful labors;
For He gives to His beloved even in his sleep. Psalm 127:1,2

Not only will He build your life and marriage but He will also give to those who are loved by Him even while they sleep! Do you know His love and are you one of His beloved children? Are you weary of trying to make it on your own? He invites you to come to Him. He will give you rest from your labor in vain.

“Come to Me, all who are weary and heavy-laden, and I will give you rest. Take My yoke upon you and learn from Me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For My yoke is easy and My burden is light.” Matthew 11:28-30

Faith is coming to Him. He is gentle and humble in heart and you will find rest for your soul as you learn to take His yoke for His yoke is easy and His burden is light.