Uncategorized – Page 90 – Instructions To A Young Life

A Life that Responds

The Lord has called the single men to be the initiators in relationships with single women. Women are called to be responders. If she is interested in the young man and he is suitable for her then she learns to respond to him. The young lady is not the initiator. For this way of life to be for a young lady she must put her trust in the Lord. If she will learn to live in His presence and put her trust in Him then she will thrive in life. If she trusts in herself then she will be constantly frustrated and defeated.

Psalm 52:8 But as for me, I am like a green olive tree in the house of God;
I trust in the lovingkindness of God forever and ever.

The Lord is the One who directs the hearts of all men.

Proverbs 21:1 The king’s heart is like channels of water in the hand of the Lord; He turns it wherever He wishes.

If she does not trust the Lord then she will be tempted to initiate or manipulate concerning young men. Either of these options are not God’s way. If she initiates or manipulates and she gets what she wants then she will never know if it is what the Lord wanted for her. When the trials come in the relationship then she will be tempted to doubt and in her time of need she will not have the assurance that the Lord brought about the relationship.

Proverbs 7:7-15 And I saw among the naive,
And discerned among the youths
A young man lacking sense,
Passing through the street near her corner;
And he takes the way to her house,
In the twilight, in the evening,
In the middle of the night and in the darkness.
And behold, a woman comes to meet him,
Dressed as a harlot and cunning of heart.
She is boisterous and rebellious,
Her feet do not remain at home;
She is now in the streets, now in the squares,
And lurks by every corner.
So she seizes him and kisses him
And with a brazen face she says to him:
“I was due to offer peace offerings;
Today I have paid my vows.
“Therefore I have come out to meet you,
To seek your presence earnestly, and I have found you.

The immoral woman is an initiator and manipulator. Often she also will have a pretense of religion, of being a good girl. However, the Bible says that her way is death.

Proverbs 2:16-19 To deliver you from the strange woman,
From the adulteress who flatters with her words;
That leaves the companion of her youth
And forgets the covenant of her God;
For her house sinks down to death
And her tracks lead to the dead;
None who go to her return again,
Nor do they reach the paths of life.

It is when we are struggling and doubting that we are tempted to take things into our hands and “make it happen”. The attitude that nobody else is looking after you so you need to look after yourself is against God’s ways. Abraham’s wife, Sarah, in the Old Testament came up with an idea to get a baby, rather than wait upon the Lord. It brought her much grief.

Genesis 16:3,4 After Abram had lived ten years in the land of Canaan, Abram’s wife Sarai took Hagar the Egyptian, her maid, and gave her to her husband Abram as his wife. He went in to Hagar, and she conceived; and when she saw that she had conceived, her mistress was despised in her sight.

In the same way, you will bring yourself grief also, if you take matters into your own hands. You may get what you “want” but will not want it in the end nor will it bring you any joy.

Proverbs 14:12 There is a way which seems right to a man, But its end is the way of death.

When a young lady responds to a young man then it makes him feel like a king. If you make a man feel like a king then he will want you to be his queen. It is well worth it to wait for God’s man and for God’s timing. If a man sees a young lady as a queen he will treat her as such.

Psalm 52:9 I will give You thanks forever, because You have done it,
And I will wait on Your name, for it is good, in the presence of Your godly ones.

In the end, if a young lady will trust in the Lord then she will give thanks to Him because she will know that He is the One who did it.

James 1:17 Every good thing given and every perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of lights, with whom there is no variation or shifting shadow.

A Life with Love as The Plan

Love is God’s plan and love was God’s plan from the beginning. God’s design was for Adam and Eve to be in a loving relationship with Him and His plan was for them to live together in a loving, harmonious relationship forever. Forever in love with Him and forever in love with each other. God is love and He made the first humans in His image.

God created man in His own image, in the image of God He created him; male and female He created them. Genesis 1:27

God blessed Adam and Eve. God made them both to rule. They were to be one and rule together in harmony with each other and in submission and fellowship with God.

Then God said, “Let Us make man in Our image, according to Our likeness; and let them rule over the fish of the sea and over the birds of the sky and over the cattle and over all the earth, and over every creeping thing that creeps on the earth.” Genesis 1:26

The Lord God blessed them and gave them instruction what to do. They were to multiply and fill the earth and subdue it. They were to rule over every living creature. In His goodness the Lord provided food for Adam and Eve and food for all of the animals. All that the Lord did in creation was very good. There was nothing to add to it and nothing to take from it.

God blessed them; and God said to them, “Be fruitful and multiply, and fill the earth, and subdue it; and rule over the fish of the sea and over the birds of the sky and over every living thing that moves on the earth.” Then God said, “Behold, I have given you every plant yielding seed that is on the surface of all the earth, and every tree which has fruit yielding seed; it shall be food for you; and to every beast of the earth and to every bird of the sky and to every thing that moves on the earth which has life, I have given every green plant for food”; and it was so. God saw all that He had made, and behold, it was very good. Genesis 1:28-31

All that God does is good because He is good. His ways are perfect and we can never add to them or take from them to make them better.

I know that everything God does will remain forever; there is nothing to add to it and there is nothing to take from it, for God has so worked that men should fear Him. Ecclesiastes 3:14

God is love and His plan from the beginning was that man would experience and live in His love.

The one who does not love does not know God, for God is love. I John 4:8

Often people want to know where they came from and what is their purpose in life. Humans are so intricately made that only One of infinite wisdom and power could have created them. God created man and woman to be in a loving relationship with Him. People will find their meaning in life when they fulfill the purpose for which they were created. God loves people and longs to be gracious to them and have compassion on them. How blessed are those people who long for Him.

Therefore the Lord longs to be gracious to you,

And therefore He waits on high to have compassion on you.

For the Lord is a God of justice;

How blessed are all those who long for Him. Isaiah 30:18

A Life of Peace and Great Peace

There is peace that can be received and there is also great peace that is available to any who desires it. Peace is the opposite of worry and fear. Everyone longs for peace in their lives, homes, marriages, relationships, neighborhoods and nation. Peace must first come to a person in their relationship with God before any lasting peace can come in other areas. The Bible says that everyone believes in God when they are born but it is man’s fallen nature to turn away from God either intentionally or unintentionally wander away from their Creator. A person can not experience lasting peace with others until they are at peace with God.

Peace I leave with you; My peace I give to you; not as the world gives do I give to you. Do not let your heart be troubled, nor let it be fearful. John 14:27

Jesus Christ is the only One who can give us peace with God. A person can receive His peace when they put their trust in Jesus Christ to be their Lord and Savior and believe that He died for their sins and that He was raised from the dead and is alive today. Jesus Christ is seated at the right hand of God and He intercedes for all who have put their trust in Him. When a person trusts in Jesus Christ then He replaces their worries, troubles and fears with His peace. It is an eternal peace from God that no one can take away nor is it a temporal peace as the world tries to give.

To guide our feet into the way of peace. Luke 1:79b

Not only did Jesus Christ come to give us peace but He also came to guide us in the way of peace with others.

When a man’s ways are pleasing to the Lord, He makes even his enemies to be at peace with him. Proverbs 16:7

The Lord teaches His ways, which are so wonderful and different from our ways, that when we live by His ways then not only our families and neighbors but even our enemies will be at peace with us.

Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all comprehension, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. Philippians 4:6,7

The Lord is so good to His children and He knows that at times we will start to feel anxious and so in His kindness He has given a provision for anxiety, and that provision is prayer. If a Christian is anxious then they need to take their anxieties and fears to the Lord in prayer with also an expression of thanksgiving, for God is in control of everything. The Lord promises to give His peace to the one who prays to Him about everything. A child of God can go through anything if they have His peace and it is available to all who will call on Him.

Those who love Your law have great peace, And nothing causes them to stumble. Psalm 119:165

Just as prayer, communicating with God, gives a person peace, there is also a great peace available for the person who loves God’s Word and loves listening to God communicate to them through His Word. The Lord speaks to His children through His Law, which is His Word.

Finally, brethren, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is of good repute, if there is any excellence and if anything worthy of praise, dwell on these things. The things you have learned and received and heard and seen in me, practice these things, and the God of peace will be with you. Philippians 4:8,9

Finally…if you are anxious, troubled or fearful then learn to dwell on whatever is true, honorable, right, pure, lovely, of good reputation, excellent and is worthy of praise. As you dwell on these things then you will be much less anxious. You must not watch or read what is wicked and evil, scary or fleshly, which only bring about more terrifying thoughts but discipline your mind and heart to focus on Jesus Christ and to abide in His Word. This will help to keep yourself wise in what is good and innocent in what is evil. It is the knowledge of God that brings peace and it is the knowledge of evil that brings turmoil with its anxieties and fears.

but I want you to be wise in what is good and innocent in what is evil. Romans 16:19b

God is a God pf peace and He wants His children to live in peace, free of worry and fears. Come to Him and let Him teach you His ways so that may learn to live in His love and truth. The outcome will be a life of peace.

Now the God of peace, who brought up from the dead the great Shepherd of the sheep through the blood of the eternal covenant, even Jesus our Lord, equip you in every good thing to do His will, working in us that which is pleasing in His sight, through Jesus Christ, to whom be the glory forever and ever. Amen. Hebrews 13:20,21

A Life that Understands Satisfaction in Marriage

Understanding What Brings Dissatisfaction in Marriage

Many of the problems that come in marriages and relationships are expectations. Expecting someone else to fulfill desires and needs in you that another can not fill. No one will ever be able to fulfill the expectations in another. Expectations destroy friendships, marriages and any relationship. Expectations set a person up for disappointments, ongoing ingratitude, anger and eventual bitterness. Expectations are desires, needs and standards that are ingrained in you because of your background, the way you were brought up, cultural expectations or from books or movies you have seen. Expectations are one of the major reasons for dissatisfaction in marriages. Satisfying marriages bring much happiness and less disappointment for both spouses.

Sheol and Abaddon are never satisfied, Nor are the eyes of man ever satisfied. Proverbs 27:20

Understanding What Brings Satisfaction in Marriages

Expectations are a lack of maturity. Nearly everyone when they get older and more mature will be honest with themselves and acknowledge that they had unrealistic expectations of their spouse when they were younger in their marriage. Happiness in marriage is dependent on satisfaction and satisfaction comes when our needs and desires are met. However, there is a difference between needs and desires. Fulfilled desires are gifts from God. Fulfilled needs are promises fulfilled by God. When a person learns to look to God for their needs and their desires to be fulfilled then they will find great satisfaction.

He has made everything beautiful in its time. He has also set eternity in the human heart; yet no one can fathom what God has done from beginning to end. I know that there is nothing better for people than to be happy and to do good while they live. That each of them may eat and drink, and find satisfaction in all their toil—this is the gift of God. Ecclesiastes 3:11-13

When a person understands that only God can give them satisfaction then they will learn to look to Him. He is the Creator and Giver of life and He loves to give to His children. He wants man to be satisfied in his marriage, his job and anything else that he undertakes.

The fear of the Lord leads to life, So that one may sleep satisfied, untouched by evil. Proverbs 19:23

And My people will be satisfied with My goodness,” declares the Lord. Jeremiah 31:14b

The Lord is man’s provider and He will never disappoint those who put their trust in Him. He will take care of their needs and they will never lack. The Christian life is a life of faith and a child of God will see God’s provision after he or she will trust God. Man will never be able to satisfy another. There will be eventual disappointment. When one learns to give their expectations to the Lord and leave them with Him then peace and satisfaction will be the outcome. When someone learns to be satisfied in God then they will be grateful for what the Lord gives and they will understand that no one can make them happy but the Lord.

Trust in the Lord and do good;
Dwell in the land and feed on His faithfulness.
Delight yourself in the Lord;
And He will give you the desires of your heart.
Commit your way to the Lord,
Trust also in Him, and He will do it. Psalm 37:3-5

A Life that Understands Meaning of “If only…”

Understanding the Meaning of “If only you had done this”

One of the aspects of getting older is seeing life in the past and seeing our mistakes. With the perspective of hindsight come regrets and pain. However, life does not have to be one of regrets. Not everyone has great regrets and the fewer regrets a person has the happier they will be. Life is made up of choices. Good choices bring happiness and bad choices bring pain. There is a book that tells us what the good choices are and how to avoid the pain of bad choices. Everyone should read this book before they make any choices and especially the very important choices. If a parent loves their child then they will teach their child what is in this book so that when the time comes they will make the right choices. The Lord is the One who wrote this book to help us and guide us through life. He loves us and gave us this book. However, He can not make us read and study it. We must make the decision that we will read, study and memorize it so that when the time comes to make decisions we will already know what to do.

“If only you had paid attention to My commandments! Then your well-being would have been like a river, And your righteousness like the waves of the sea. Isaiah 48:18

The Lord says to all of us, that if only we will pay attention to His commandments then our well being will never end, but flow continuously and our right decisions will be like the waves of the sea, which never stop. We will do what is right continually and our inner cup of joy and happiness will overflow. In other words, we will love life and live an incredible life. We will have the happiness that we long for and the love and respect that we need. This is the kind of life that the Lord wants for us. He has told us in His Word what we need to do in every area of life. If only…we will do it then we will thrive in life and we will be blessed in every area.

But one who looks intently at the perfect law, the law of liberty, and abides by it, not having become a forgetful hearer but an effectual doer, this man will be blessed in what he does. James 1:25

It is never too late to learn. If you have not been reading the Bible, God’s instruction manual for life, then begin today. Read it every morning when you get up and every evening before you go to bed. When a verse speaks to you then memorize it. If you will be faithful to do this and to do what it says then you will see changes in your life for the better. You will start to have great peace, quietness within and confidence when you make decisions. You will sleep better and not have so many doubts. You will truly be on the pathway of life.

And the work of righteousness will be peace,
And the service of righteousness, quietness and confidence forever.
Then my people will live in a peaceful habitation,
And in secure dwellings and in undisturbed resting places; Isaiah 32:17,18

A Life that Understands Why a Man Respects a Woman

Understanding a Woman’s Need for Respect

Women long for respect but many do not receive it. Respect is an aspect of love that says, “you are of great worth and worthy of honor”. Everyone wants respect and honor but few understand how to receive it. Love and respect are two of a woman’s biggest needs. They are both expressions of the same value, and that is, the worth of a person. Love and respect make a woman feel of great worth. When a woman does not receive respect and love then she starts to feel worthless. When she feels of less worth, then she makes poor decisions with bad consequences. A woman needs love and respect. A woman who fears God, which means that she lives a life respecting and honoring the Lord and doing what He says, is a woman who will be honored and respected.

Charm is deceitful and beauty is vain,
But a woman who fears the Lord, she shall be praised. Proverbs 31:30

Understanding the Nature of Respect

It is not charm and it is not beauty that causes a man to respect a woman. He may want to be with her temporarily because of her beauty and charm but if she is not a woman of godly character then he will not respect her nor desire to make a life commitment of marriage to her. In fact, if he is not of a good character then he may be tempted to use her and she will be exploited. Men respect a woman who is virtuous. A woman of virtue is not exploited by men. A virtuous woman is one who does not compromise what is right. There is a sense of what is right in our conscience. We may feel guilty the first time we violate our conscience but if we continue to go against our conscience then our conscience becomes hardened and it no longer seems wrong to us. This pattern continues and before long we are living a compromised life. The outcome of a compromised life is that men will no longer show respect for the one who has compromised. Not only will men lose respect for women who compromise but they will soon walk all over them.

You are the salt of the earth; but if the salt has become tasteless, how can it be made salty again? It is no longer good for anything, except to be thrown out and trampled under foot by men. Matthew 5:13

Understand How Respect and Honor Can Be Regained

A woman loses her freshness or saltiness when she compromises and violates her conscience. The word “violate” means to change. When a woman’s conscience is violated then she is changed. A man is not showing love and respect for any woman who he wants to become physically intimate with before marriage. He is loving himself and it is not love for her but it is lust for her. Any man who has sex with a woman before marriage is violating and using her. When a man uses and violates the woman then she is changed. She no longer feels worthy of the very honor, love and respect that she longs for and it now eludes her. She feels “worth-less”. Is she worth less than before? No, for she is of great worth to the Lord Jesus Christ. He loves her for who she is now and not merely for who she was or who she will become. Jesus Christ loves her for exactly who she is now, no matter how much she has compromised or been violated. If she will come to the Lord Jesus Christ and tell Him that she needs Him and that she wants to belong to Him then He will restore her worth. He is the only One who can change her into the beautiful woman she longs to be and give her the honor and respect that she longs for. He is God and He is able to restore her worth. She is worth so much to Him that He died for her. Come to Jesus Christ if you have compromised or been violated and let Him make you into a new creation of great value and worth.

Therefore if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creature; the old things passed away; behold, new things have come. II Corinthians 5:17

A Life that Understands Who Rules Your Husband

Understanding that Every Man Has One Who Is His Ruler

No man is a law unto himself but every man has One over him who is his head and rules him. The sooner a man recognizes who his Ruler is and submits himself to his Ruler’s laws then the happier he will be. The Lord made every man to be a king but the Lord says that He is the Ruler of the kings of the earth. No matter how much honor, position, rank and authority that a man is given in this life there is still One who rules over him and is his authority. The Lord Jesus Christ is Ruler over every man and He is the head of every family. Someone may well ask, “What if the man does not recognize the Lord Jesus Christ as his authority and ruler?” The answer to that question is that Jesus Christ is the Head of every man and home and whether a man or husband recognizes the Lordship, authority and rule of Jesus Christ, it does not change the fact that Jesus Christ is Lord of all. A man will be miserable and have sorrow in one form or another if he does not submit to Jesus Christ. He will have even greater misery if he mistreats his wife or his children. If a wife or child has put their trust in Jesus Christ and is being mistreated by their husband or father and cries out to the Lord Jesus Christ then the Lord will come and protect them. The Lord is ultimately the One whom we trust and He is very effective in dealing with an unruly husband or father. A wife who trusts in the Lord can submit to her husband because God is greater than her husband and promises to exercise His power in dealing with her husband if her husband does not love her and live with her in an understanding manner.

Wives, be subject to your own husbands, as to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife, as Christ also is the head of the church, He Himself being the Savior of the body. But as the church is subject to Christ, so also the wives ought to be to their husbands in everything. Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself up for her, Ephesians 5:22-25

But I want you to understand that Christ is the head of every man, and the man is the head of a woman, and God is the head of Christ. I Corinthians 11:3

Understanding What Both Husband and Wife Need to Do

There is an order of authority in the home. It is for our protection and provision. A person under authority can always go to the one who is their authority for protection and provision. With authority comes responsibility. The higher the authority then the greater the responsibility. The Lord is the final authority of which we are all under. However, His provision comes through the one whom He has given the responsibility to. Jesus loved His own who were in the world and He loved them to the end. The Lord has called the husband to love his wife in a sacrificial expression of love. This means that he is to die to himself and his desires in order to love his wife the way she needs to be loved. He is to live with her in an understanding manner. The Lord meets the one who wants to do life right and the Lord will teach the husband how to love his wife and when he becomes a father then the Lord will teach him how to love his children. In a similar way, a woman is to look to the Lord and He will teach her how, as a wife, she is to respect her husband and submit to him and as a mother, how she is to love her children. This is much easier to do if her husband loves her. The greatest thing a father can do for his children is to love their mother with a Christlike love. The greatest thing a mother can do for her children is to respect and honor their father. When children grow up in a loving home where the parents love the Lord and love each other then the children will learn to love and respect others also. The children will feel loved because when parents love each other then they will love their children. A person’s relationship with their spouse is an expression of their relationship with the Lord. Do not say that you love God if you do not love your spouse and your children.

If someone says, “I love God,” and hates his brother, he is a liar; for the one who does not love his brother whom he has seen, cannot love God whom he has not seen. I John 4:20

If you want to see the Lord act on your behalf then you must do what He says. He will protect you and He will very severely deal with your husband if he is not treating you right. If you are under God’s authority, which means, that you must live under your husband’s authority and submit to him then the Lord will act on your behalf. The Lord says that He will not hear a man’s prayers if the man does not love his wife and treat her right. The Lord says that He will not accept the husband’s worship if he mistreats his wife. The Lord says that if a man does not provide for his family then he is worse than an unbeliever, who will spend eternity in hell. The Lord says that there are some serious consequences for the husband and father who does fulfill his God given responsibilities. However, the wife and the children will not see God’s love unless they are doing what they ought to be doing. The Lord is the head of every man and the husband is the head of his wife and children. The wife needs to submit to the husband and the children need to obey their father. When they are submissive and obedient to the Lord then they need to cry out to the Lord if there is anything wrong. He will hear their cries to Him and answer them.

For in this way in former times the holy women also, who hoped in God, used to adorn themselves, being submissive to their own husbands; just as Sarah obeyed Abraham, calling him lord, and you have become her children if you do what is right without being frightened by any fear. You husbands in the same way, live with your wives in an understanding way, as with someone weaker, since she is a woman; and show her honor as a fellow heir of the grace of life, so that your prayers will not be hindered. I Peter 3:5-7

“This is another thing you do: you cover the altar of the Lord with tears, with weeping and with groaning, because He no longer regards the offering or accepts it with favor from your hand. Yet you say, ‘For what reason?’ Because the Lord has been a witness between you and the wife of your youth, against whom you have dealt treacherously, though she is your companion and your wife by covenant. Malachi 2:13-14

A Life that Has a Refuge

A refuge is a safe place. We all need a refuge. The Lord has a refuge for the Christian lady where she will always be safe. It is very important for a young lady to understand this truth. The Bible says that the Lord keeps us and the devil can not touch us.

I John 5:18 He who was born of God keeps him, and the evil one does not touch him.

If a young Christian lady is any danger it is very important that she runs to the Lord. She must speak the name of Jesus Christ in her situation. People have to block out God in order to do evil.

Proverbs 18:10 The name of the Lord is a strong tower; The righteous runs into it and is safe.

Pour out your heart to the Lord. He will come to you. Seek refuge in Him.

Psalm 62:8 Trust in Him at all times, O people; Pour out your heart before Him; God is a refuge for us.

He will be a shield to all who take refuge in Him. Don’t go where you should not go but if you find yourself being attacked in your thought life or by the accusations of others then go to the Lord and call on His name. He will help you and be a shield for you to extinguish the fiery darts of the evil one. If you are in physical danger He will be a shield for you. Nothing can touch you unless it first comes through Him.

Psalm 37:40 The Lord helps them and delivers them; He delivers them from the wicked and saves them, Because they take refuge in Him.

He is a very present help in trouble.

Psalm 46:1 God is our refuge and strength, A very present help in trouble.

There are many verses in the Bible about the Lord being a refuge for the Christian. However, unless we believe them they do not help us.

Hebrews 4:2 For indeed we have had good news preached to us, just as they also; but the word they heard did not profit them, because it was not united by faith in those who heard.

If we take His Word and believe what He says then we will possess His promises. They will become ours and we will have faith, hope and courage.

Hebrews 6:18 so that by two unchangeable things in which it is impossible for God to lie, we who have taken refuge would have strong encouragement to take hold of the hope set before us.

The book of Hebrews was written to the Christians whose homes had been taken from them and they had to flee Rome during the times of the early church. They were able to persevere under very trying circumstances only because they put their hope in Him.

James 1:12 Blessed is a man who perseveres under trial; for once he has been approved, he will receive the crown of life which the Lord has promised to those who love Him.

We are not to shrink back in the day of trial but we are to take refuge in Him and persevere so that we shall not be ashamed. It is the little trials that prepare us for the bigger trials. The Lord is a present help in time of trouble but you must call on Him.

Hebrews 10:37-39 For yet in a very little while,
He who is coming will come, and will not delay.
But My righteous one shall live by faith;
And if he shrinks back, My soul has no pleasure in him.

But we are not of those who shrink back to destruction, but of those who have faith to the preserving of the soul.

Faith is taking refuge in Him and believing what He says is true. When our faith is strong then our courage is strong and we are able to persevere. Discouragement means that we have lost our courage. The Lord says to be strong and courageous. He is coming again and His reward is with Him and for all who were faithful.

A Life that Understands that Your Husband is a King

Understanding God’s Design for a Man to Be a King

The Lord made every man to be a king. A king is a ruler and God made men to conquer and rule. A man needs a queen to share in his kingdom. The most important decision that a man makes, other than where he will spend eternity, is who will be his queen. An excellent wife is the crown of her husband. If he chooses an excellent wife then he will have far more advantages in life to conquer and rule. An excellent wife will be a wife that he can trust. She will only do him good and will not cause him grief. She will have his best interests in her mind and do what is right. She will give him honor. An excellent wife will not seek to get her own way but she will seek to do her husband’s will. She will not manipulate him or keep secrets from him, such as, how she spends money, where she goes and who she talks to. She will not talk about his struggles, weaknesses or faults with other women (not even with her mother). She will not correspond with other men. Her husband will be able to trust her completely and he will be able to delegate responsibilities to her. He will listen to her advice for she will have his best interests at heart and not have ulterior self-seeking motives. She will understand that a children’s glory is their father and she will teach their children to honor their father and she will not ever criticize him to their children. She will not ever say, “don’t tell your father”. If there is a question as to what to do, then she will say, “let us ask your father” and if he is not available then she will know her husband well enough to know what he would want them to do. An excellent wife will recognize her husband’s right to rule.

An excellent wife is the crown of her husband, Proverbs 12:4

Understanding How a Man Becomes a King

A man first learns to rule well by ruling his wife. This is not a bad thing but it is a good thing because it is her protection. She was deceived in the garden by the Serpent’s beauty and charm. She is still easily deceived. God made husband and wife to be joint rulers and she is also a ruler but her husband rules over her. God rules over the husband. If she will trust God then she can learn to trust God through her husband. The Lord will protect her from harm if she will trust the Lord. The Lord’s provision for protection for females is first their father and then their husband. They must stay under their God given authority. If they get out from or go against their God given authority then it is only a matter of time before they will be violated. After a man rules his wife then he rules his children. An excellent wife helps him to be king in their home. She teaches her children to obey their father, not only through her words, but through her example. When a man rules well in his household then he believes he can conquer in the world. He can face each day with confidence.

To the woman He said,
“I will greatly multiply
Your pain in childbirth,
In pain you will bring forth children;
Yet your desire will be for your husband,
And he will rule over you.” Genesis 3:16

Men are very different from women, not only physically, but psychologically. When a man is pleased with a woman then he will give up to half of his kingdom. He wants a queen who will share in his glory. He is looking for a trustworthy woman to love and one whom can give himself to and all that he has. If you become that excellent wife then you will have no regrets. Your husband and children will praise you and your works will praise you also. You will be a success and your husband will be a success also.

Her children rise up and bless her;
Her husband also, and he praises her, saying:
“Many daughters have done nobly,
But you excel them all.”
Charm is deceitful and beauty is vain,
But a woman who fears the Lord, she shall be praised.
Give her the product of her hands,
And let her works praise her in the gates. Proverbs 31:28-31

A Life that Understands the Need to Be Wise

Understand the Source of Wisdom

The Bible says that if a person is wise then they will experience the wonderful and sweet fruit of wisdom, which is love, purity, peace, gentleness, mercy, knowledge, honor, riches and life. However, if a person is not wise then they will experience the bitter fruit of not being wise, which is a broken heart, jealousy, envy, much grief, regret, guilt, shame, loneliness, bitterness, ignorance, a hard life, dishonor and death. There is nothing that can compare to wisdom. Wisdom gives life to life and keeps a person from experiencing the snares of death. Wisdom is available to all and whoever finds it loves his own soul. He who does not find wisdom neglects himself and brings grief to himself. Wisdom is more valuable than riches, honor, and power, for without wisdom all of these other things can destroy a person. A person may gain the whole world but without wisdom then he will never be satisfied and will only want more. Wisdom is a gift that comes from God. A person who is not a Christian can read God’s Word, which is the Bible, and receive knowledge but not wisdom. Wisdom is the illumination of knowledge to know what to do for a desired good result. Many people want wisdom without God but wisdom only comes from God. A nonChristian can only have knowledge and knowledge usually makes arrogant. It is when we humble ourselves before God that He will give us wisdom. Wisdom is necessary for true success. The success of the world will ultimately destroy a person if he does not get wisdom. It is only the Lord that gives riches, honor, power, etc. without sorrow.

Blessed is a person who finds wisdom,
And one who obtains understanding.
For her profit is better than the profit of silver,
And her produce better than gold.
She is more precious than jewels,
And nothing you desire compares with her.
Long life is in her right hand;
In her left hand are riches and honor.
Her ways are pleasant ways,
And all her paths are peace.
She is a tree of life to those who take hold of her,
And happy are those who hold on to her. Proverbs 3:13-18

Understand that Wisdom Is the Instruction for Life

Wisdom belongs to the Lord, who is the author of life. Wisdom is how to live life right so that you will be successful and experience great joy and gladness. Wisdom is protection from pain and wisdom is instruction on how to gain what is good. Most people ultimately learn wisdom from either experiencing the pain that comes from not doing wisdom or they experience the happiness that comes from doing wisdom. Wisdom is how to do life right. We recognize when life is done right but often we do not know how to do it for ourselves. We can see if someone has a good marriage but often we don’t know what to do to have a good marriage. We can see if another’s children are excelling in life but often we struggle with getting our child to do well. Wisdom is not elusive to the one who seeks God. The one who does not seek the Lord will not ever find wisdom. He may find knowledge but he will not receive wisdom. He will only know the pain in his heart of not doing wisdom. Wisdom belongs to the Lord and He gives it to those who know Him. The knowledge of God is understanding and the one who has understanding will also have wisdom.

Wisdom rests in the heart of one who has understanding, But in the heart of fools it is made known. Proverbs 14:33

If you will only ask the Lord for wisdom then He will give it to you. It is one of the few promises that the Lord gives to all, to whoever will ask Him for wisdom, that He will give it and give it generously. The Lord wants to help you. The Lord loves you. He is waiting for us to come to Him. If you are struggling in an area then go to Him and ask Him for wisdom.

But if any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask of God, who gives to all generously and without reproach, and it will be given to him. James 1:5

Get wisdom. Humble yourself before the Lord and acknowledge Jesus Christ as the source of true wisdom. You will be glad. Scoffing is turning our back on the Lord and on His ways. When we act according to our understanding or the bad counsel of others then we are the ones who suffer. God does not delight in your pain but He delights in the one who comes to Him, even if it is to avoid pain. Taste and see that the Lord is good. It is the kindness of God that leads us to repent of following our own thoughts and wanting to go our own ways. He loves you and His ways are good and kind.

If you are wise, you are wise for yourself, And if you scoff, you alone will bear it. Proverbs 9:12