Love in marriage – Page 32 – Instructions To A Young Life

A Life with Love as Life

As long as Adam kept the commandment of God then he would live and he would be able to experience love and give love. The moment that he would disobey God then he would die.

The Lord God commanded the man, saying, “From any tree of the garden you may eat freely; but from the tree of the knowledge of good and evil you shall not eat, for in the day that you eat from it you will surely die.” Genesis 2:16,17

When Adam disobeyed God and experienced death then he began to abide in death rather than to abide in life. When death abides then love also dies.

We know that we have passed out of death into life, because we love the brethren. He who does not love abides in death. I John 3:14

God is life and in Him is no death. He who has God has life and he who does not have God abides in death.

And the testimony is this, that God has given us eternal life, and this life is in His Son. He who has the Son has the life; he who does not have the Son of God does not have the life. I John 5:11,12

Apart from God we only exist and abide in death. God made us to be in a love relationship with Himself but He gave us the freedom to choose. We could choose to be in that relationship with Him and abide in life and His love or we could go our own way and abide in death. Love is a choice, a commitment, a gift and is life. When we choose God and commit our lives to Him then we receive the gift of love and life and we are able to give love and share life with someone else. When we choose to disobey God and go our own way then we abide in death and we are not able to experience life or God’s love. We exist in a lonely world with little meaning other than getting through to the next day. We may think we love but it is only a shadow of the real thing. Often it is a “I love you because…”. It may be duty or survival or even a mutual friendship love with someone else but once the duty or benefit to self is over then the love fades.

Beloved, let us love one another, for love is from God; and everyone who loves is born of God and knows God. I John 4:7

The conditional love that is in the world can not compare to the unconditional love that the Lord shows and gives to those who know Him. The source of God’s love is God Himself and when He comes to live within someone then He fills them with His love and it is His love that He gives to them to give to others. This is the kind of love that makes a marriage sweet and strong. Not only does this kind of love make a marriage strong but it is the only kind of love that can make a friendship or familial relationship sweet and strong. He who has this kind of love truly lives and is able to give love to others.

A Life with Love is Vulnerable

Love makes us vulnerable because it sets us up for the possibility of rejection. However, vulnerability is a part of the marriage relationship and the fulfillment in marriage comes when there is love and total acceptance in the relationship. This is how God loves and this kind of mutual love in marriage can not be found anywhere else but in Him. It is His design and when we live according to His design then we will praise Him and thank Him for His wisdom, His kindness, His perfection and His amazing plan for us.

And the man and his wife were both naked and were not ashamed.

Genesis 2:25

If you want the kind of love that the Lord planned for your marriage then you must begin before marriage to follow His instructions. Every reference in the Bible to nakedness refers to shame except for the nakedness in marriage and the nakedness of babies and older people when they are helpless and dying.

He said, “Naked I came from my mother’s womb,
And naked I shall return there.
The Lord gave and the Lord has taken away.
Blessed be the name of the Lord.” Job 1:21

When you are naked without the protection of the marriage covenant then you open yourself up for your shame to be exposed and to be rejected by another.

“Your nakedness will be uncovered,
Your shame also will be exposed; Isaiah 47:3

Those who would have honored you will be tempted to despise you once they see your nakedness. Once you realize that you are no longer honored as you once were or should be honored then you, yourself will groan within and struggle with the lack of respect.

All who honored her despise her Because they have seen her nakedness; Even she herself groans and turns away. Lamentations 1:8

It is not love for a man to look on a woman in her nakedness unless he is married to her. Marriage is a commitment to love unconditionally the other and if he wants to see her nakedness before marriage then he is not loving her before marriage and will not love her after marriage. The Bible says that the eyes of man are never satisfied and he will not be satisfied for very long by what he sees before marriage if he sees a woman in her nakedness. If a woman allows a man to see her in her nakedness before marriage then she has exposed herself to her own shame and destruction.

Nor are the eyes of man ever satisfied. Proverbs 27:20b

Amnon thought he “loved” Tamar but he did not love Tamar, he lusted after Tamar. He wanted Tamar in her nakedness and wanted to lie with her. After he got what he wanted then he despised her. His hatred of her was greater than his “love” for her.

When she brought them to him to eat, he took hold of her and said to her, “Come, lie with me, my sister.” But she answered him, “No, my brother, do not violate me, for such a thing is not done in Israel; do not do this disgraceful thing! As for me, where could I get rid of my reproach? And as for you, you will be like one of the fools in Israel. Now therefore, please speak to the king, for he will not withhold me from you.” However, he would not listen to her; since he was stronger than she, he violated her and lay with her. Then Amnon hated her with a very great hatred; for the hatred with which he hated her was greater than the love with which he had loved her. And Amnon said to her, “Get up, go away!” II Samuel 13:11-15

It is disgraceful for a man and woman to be physically intimate before marriage. It is foolish for the man and he violates the woman and brings disgrace to her. The fulfillment of a man’s lust sows the seeds for the death of love and respect in a marriage. It is only a matter of time before the seed grows and produces the bad fruit of distrust and disrespect. If he does not marry the girl that he has violated then he is adding sin to sin. God is not mocked and it is only a matter of time before he will start reaping the consequences of his actions.

But she said to him, “No, because this wrong in sending me away is greater than the other that you have done to me!” Yet he would not listen to her. Then he called his young man who attended him and said, “Now throw this woman out of my presence, and lock the door behind her.” II Samuel 13:16,17

If you want the kind of love in your marriage that the Lord designed then you must learn His ways and do them. His love for you is perfect and His ways are perfect. His plan for you is love, for you to love and to be loved unconditonally. This is the way He loves and it is a love that accepts, protects, cherishes and lifts up each spouse to a higher lever of intimacy than they ever dreamed. This is the vulnerability in marriage that every married person longs for, to be loved for exactly who we are without the fear of rejection.

There is no fear in love; but perfect love casts out fear, I John 4:18

A Life with Love Must Have a Builder

Adam and Eve needed the Lord and they needed Him to instruct them and to show them how to do life. The sooner that we realize that we are the clay and that the Lord is the Potter then the happier and stronger our lives and marriages will be.

But now, O Lord, You are our Father,
We are the clay, and You our potter;
And all of us are the work of Your hand. Isaiah 64:8

We are the work of God’s hands and He made us in love and His plan for our lives is to be loved and to love. This is why He calls us His “beloved”, because He wants us to be loved by Him. We belong to Him and that means that we are to “be longing” for Him. He longs to love us and how blessed are those who long for Him and His love.

Therefore the Lord longs to be gracious to you,
And therefore He waits on high to have compassion on you.
For the Lord is a God of justice;
How blessed are all those who long for Him. Isaiah 30:18

As you yield to the Potter and allow Him who made you to build your life, relationships and marriage then you will thrive. He knows exactly what is perfect for you and He loves you perfectly. Your labor will be in vain until you come to the place in your life of surrender to Him and allow Him to be your Lord and Savior.

Unless the Lord builds the house,
They labor in vain who build it;
Unless the Lord guards the city,
The watchman keeps awake in vain.
It is vain for you to rise up early,
To retire late,
To eat the bread of painful labors;
For He gives to His beloved even in his sleep. Psalm 127:1,2

Not only will He build your life and marriage but He will also give to those who are loved by Him even while they sleep! Do you know His love and are you one of His beloved children? Are you weary of trying to make it on your own? He invites you to come to Him. He will give you rest from your labor in vain.

“Come to Me, all who are weary and heavy-laden, and I will give you rest. Take My yoke upon you and learn from Me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For My yoke is easy and My burden is light.” Matthew 11:28-30

Faith is coming to Him. He is gentle and humble in heart and you will find rest for your soul as you learn to take His yoke for His yoke is easy and His burden is light.

A Life with Love as A Commitment

Just as love is a choice and not a feeling, love is also a commitment to another person. Love chooses to commit oneself to another person. There are different levels of commitment for the different levels of love. The most intimate level of love is the marriage of a husband and wife. Marriage between a man and a woman is the only relationship where there is a oneness of spirit, soul and body.

The Lord God fashioned into a woman the rib which He had taken from the man, and brought her to the man. The man said,

“This is now bone of my bones,
And flesh of my flesh;
She shall be called Woman,
Because she was taken out of Man.” Genesis 2:22,23

The Lord is the One who gave Eve to Adam. The Lord gave Eve to Adam so that they might be joined to the Lord in fellowship and relationship and be joined to each other in marriage. She was to be his companion, helpmate and lover. For the man to be joined to his wife the way that God designed he needs to leave his father and mother.

For this reason a man shall leave his father and his mother, and be joined to his wife; and they shall become one flesh.

Genesis 2:24

A man’s loyalty can not be divided between his parents and his wife. His loyalty must be to his wife. He is still to honor his parents but he now “belongs” to his wife, which means that he is to “be longing to be with his wife”. He is not to allow his heart to be separated between his parents and his wife. He is to be completely committed to his wife…spiritually, emotionally and physically. He is not only to leave his parents physically but also emotionally.

He who separates himself seeks his own desire, He quarrels against all sound wisdom. Proverbs 18:1

A husband is to love his wife as he loves himself. He is to nourish her and cherish her. He is to love her as his own body and he is to love her in an unconditional way. He will find that as he does this that she will trust and respect him. She will respond to him and will want him.

So husbands ought also to love their own wives as their own bodies. He who loves his own wife loves himself; for no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it,

Ephesians 5:28,29a

In God’s design the husband and wife experienced the most loving and sweetest relationship between humans. They were naked and not ashamed. Everyone longs to be accepted for exactly who they are without any pretenses. This is a gift that the Lord gives to a couple in a God centered marriage done God’s way.

And the man and his wife were both naked and were not ashamed. Genesis 2:25

Adam and Eve were able to experience this most intimate relationship with each other because they had an intimate relationship with the Lord. It is not until one is totally honest and “naked” before the Lord can they be totally honest with their spouse. When people have experienced the unconditional love of God then they are able to give that unconditional love to another.

In this is love, not that we loved God, but that He loved us and sent His Son to be the propitiation for our sins. Beloved, if God so loved us, we also ought to love one another. I John 4:10,11

Unconditional love accepts and loves the other person just the way they are even with their faults, flaws and failures. God demonstrated His love towards us when we did not love Him, while we were still His enemies, by sending His Son, Jesus Christ to die for our sins and to take the punishment that we deserved.

But God demonstrates His own love toward us, in that while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us. Romans 5:8

God loves us perfectly and when a married couple experiences that perfect love then it casts out all fear and they are able to love each other the way they need to be loved. They can be naked and not ashamed.

There is no fear in love; but perfect love casts out fear

I John 4:18

A Life with Love is Not Alone

Love can not exist by itself. Love is relational. Adam needed a companion to share life with and one with whom he could be of one spirit, one soul and one body. Together they were the image of God and were to be fruitful, multiply, fill the earth and subdue it.

Then the Lord God said, “It is not good for the man to be alone; I will make him a helper suitable for him.” Genesis 1:18

The word “suitable” means “corresponding to” in the original language that the Bible was written. The prefix “cor” means heart so the design was that the woman that God would bring to Adam would respond to Adam’s heart. She would know his innermost needs and longings and she would respond to his heart. The Lord made woman to be a responder and she can’t and won’t respond to just any man but God’s plan is that she will respond to the man that God has designed for her to be his helper. For this reason it is important that the husband love his wife so that she will learn to respond to him in the way God designed. The marriage relationship is a picture of God’s relationship with His people. The wife is to respond to her husband just as the Lord wants us to respond to His heart.

… He raised up David to be their king, concerning whom He also testified and said, ‘I have found David the son of Jesse, a man after My heart, who will do all My will.’ Acts 13:22b

A wife who responds to her husband’s heart will do what her husband’s will is and not her own will. For this reason she will be of great worth to her husband and his heart will trust her.

An excellent wife, who can find?
For her worth is far above jewels.
The heart of her husband trusts in her,
And he will have no lack of gain.

Proverbs 31:10,11

When a wife learns to respond to her husband’s heart and he trusts her then she will fulfill her role as his “helper”. This word “helper” literally means savior and this is the only time in Scripture where it is used in reference to a person. She will be that important to him and he will have no lack of gain. He will have found a good thing and she will bring him favor from God.

He who finds a wife finds a good thing
And obtains favor from the Lord. Proverbs 18:22

Each person will find their satisfaction in life when they fulfill the role for which they were created. That person will be blessed and will be a blessing to many. The word “blessed” means happy. When a wife discovers what the Lord has for her then she will bring great happiness to her husband and she will also find happiness in accomplishing the work that God has given her to do. Since every woman and every man is different then the relationship will look different as each man’s heart and each woman is uniquely made by God. However, the promises, commands and instructions do not change. They will only be expressed in different ways. The outcome will be the same. Her husband will praise her and God will be glorified. There will be love, respect and trust in the marriage.

Her children rise up and bless her;
Her husband also, and he praises her, saying:
“Many daughters have done nobly,
But you excel them all.”
Charm is deceitful and beauty is vain,
But a woman who fears the Lord, she shall be praised.

Proverbs 31:28-30

A Life with Love is not Prideful

After Adam sinned he hid himself because he was afraid. He was afraid of how the Lord would respond. No longer was Adam responding to the Lord in obedience but Adam initiated sin and now he was anticipating God’s response. He speculated and presumed that the Lord would not be pleased and may even be angry so he hid himself. The relationship now had gotten turned around because Adam had sinned and it was no longer according to God’s blueprint. God is the initiator and man is the responder. The One who is the leader and begins the relationship is the initiator.

Then God said, “Let Us make man in Our image, according to Our likeness; and let them rule over the fish of the sea and over the birds of the sky and over the cattle and over all the earth, and over every creeping thing that creeps on the earth.” God created man in His own image, in the image of God He created him; male and female He created them. God blessed them; and God said to them, “Be fruitful and multiply, and fill the earth, and subdue it; and rule over the fish of the sea and over the birds of the sky and over every living thing that moves on the earth.” Genesis 1:26-28

God began the love relationship with man and God had a plan for Adam and Eve. He gave them a purpose in life and a calling. He gave the man and woman glory when He made them in the image of God. He crowned them with honor.

What is man that You take thought of him,
And the son of man that You care for him?
Yet You have made him a little lower than God,
And You crown him with glory and majesty!
You make him to rule over the works of Your hands;
You have put all things under his feet,
All sheep and oxen,
And also the beasts of the field,
The birds of the heavens and the fish of the sea,
Whatever passes through the paths of the seas. Psalm 8:4-8

Adam and Eve in their pride and foolishness disobeyed God and were no longer responding to His love for them. They thought they knew better than God. They became in a sense like God but since they were not God, they failed miserably and lost everything. They lost their fellowship with God and they lost their glory and honor. They lost the trust that God had in them. They lost their home. They lost the joy of being in God’s presence. They lost experiencing His love. They lost it all because of their pride.

When pride comes, then comes dishonor,
But with the humble is wisdom. Proverbs 11:2

In a similar way, the man is the leader in his relationship with a woman. He is to be the initiator and she is to be the responder. The man is the one who initiates and begins the marriage. God has made the husband to be primarily responsible for the marriage.

Then the Lord God said, “It is not good for the man to be alone; I will make him a helper suitable for him.” Genesis 2:18

The woman is called to respond to and follow her husband. It is a woman’s pride that makes her want to control the relationship. It is not God’s blueprint for marriage. God made the man first and brought the woman to him. If you want your marriage to be successful then you must follow God’s plan and have your marriage be built after God’s blueprint.

So the Lord God caused a deep sleep to fall upon the man, and he slept; then He took one of his ribs and closed up the flesh at that place. The Lord God fashioned into a woman the rib which He had taken from the man, and brought her to the man. The man said, “This is now bone of my bones,
And flesh of my flesh;
She shall be called Woman,
Because she was taken out of Man.” Genesis 2:21-23

The marriage relationship is to be a picture of God’s relationship with man. If you are a wife then your relationship with your husband is a picture of your relationship with the Lord. If you are a husband then your relationship with your wife is a picture of how well you understand and know the Lord and His love and how obedient you are to Him.

This mystery is great; but I am speaking with reference to Christ and the church. Nevertheless, each individual among you also is to love his own wife even as himself, and the wife must see to it that she respects her husband. Ephesians 5:32,33

If a wife is and does as God has called her to be and do, then she will be the crown of her husband. She will receive glory and be crowned with honor.

An excellent wife is the crown of her husband, Proverbs 12:4a

If the husband does and is as God would have him then he will have that excellent wife whose worth far exceeds jewels. His heart will trust her and he will not lack gain. She will do him good all the days of her life.

An excellent wife, who can find?
For her worth is far above jewels.
The heart of her husband trusts in her,
And he will have no lack of gain.
She does him good and not evil
All the days of her life. Proverbs 31:10-12

A Life with Love Has Great Joy

Love brings great joy to the one who loves and to the one who is loved. Joy is different than happiness. Happiness comes from what is happening but joy comes from something else. Joy comes from being in the presence of God.

You will make known to me the path of life;
In Your presence is fullness of joy;
In Your right hand there are pleasures forever. Psalm 16:11

When Adam and Eve walked with God in the garden of Eden and knew His presence then they had fullness of joy. Fullness of joy meant that they were filled with joy. They walked the path of life with God and were filled with His joy. Not only did they know much joy, but they experienced His pleasures. They knew life, joy and pleasure. Everything that they had was given to them. When they sinned then they traded life for death, joy for despair and His pleasures for the counterfeit pleasure of the world, which is an illusion and leaves one feeling even more empty once the feeling of pleasure leaves.

for the joy of the Lord is your strength. Nehemiah 8:10b

The joy of the Lord brings strength. Death, despair and emptiness drain a person of the strength that God designed for them. Without joy then relationships become a drudgery and a burden. Not only does the joy of the Lord lighten the load of everyday life and but His joy keeps the love in relationships. When we turn to the Lord and take refuge in Him then we can know His joy.

But let all who take refuge in You be glad, Let them ever sing for joy; And may You shelter them, That those who love Your name may exult in You. Psalm 5:11

Joy comes from His salvation. You know when someone has come into a personal relationship with the Lord because that person wants to sing for joy.

Sing for joy in the Lord, O you righteous ones; Praise is becoming to the upright. Psalm 33:1

They have experienced God’s love and presence and they can’t hid their joy. They want to share that joy with others.

Restore to me the joy of Your salvation
And sustain me with a willing spirit.
Then I will teach transgressors Your ways,
And sinners will be converted to You. Psalm 52:12,13

When God sent His only begotten Son, Jesus Christ, into the world to restore man to his relationship with God then He also restored the joy of the Lord within man by giving His Holy Spirit to the one who has come to trust Him. Joy characterizes the child of God because he has once again come into God’s presence through Christ. Joy also characterizes the couple who have built their marriage according to God’s design.

But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, Galatians 5:22

The joy of the Lord goes in both directions. Adam and Eve brought the Lord great joy when they walked with Him and enjoyed that sweet fellowship. He loved them and He delighted in their communication and in His relationship.

But the prayer of the upright is His delight. Proverbs 15:8b

We, too, can still bring the Lord great delight when we walk with Him and pray to Him. We know His joy as we come into His presence. His joy is like a fragrant aroma in our relationships and also as we go through the day. When we walk with Him then we hate sin and anything that grieves His Spirit because we love Him know that the joy of being with Him is like no other joy and there is nothing to compare with Him.

Therefore be imitators of God, as beloved children; and walk in love, just as Christ also loved you and gave Himself up for us, an offering and a sacrifice to God as a fragrant aroma. Ephesians 5:1,2

We also realize that sin destroys the joy in our marriage and relationships. Before Adam and Eve had sinned they had that sweet communion with the Lord and with each other because they obeyed Him and knew Him. If you are married then you will see that as you and your spouse each seek to please the Lord then your hearts will become knit together and your love will deepen for the Lord and for each other. You will not want to do anything to quench the Spirit for it will quench the love and joy that the Lord gives to those who live in His presence. As a married couple learns to live together in His presence then their love relationship with the Lord and each other will be a sweet aroma to everyone around them and the rest of the world.

But thanks be to God, who always leads us in triumph in Christ, and manifests through us the sweet aroma of the knowledge of Him in every place. For we are a fragrance of Christ to God among those who are being saved and among those who are perishing; II Corinthians 2:14,15

A Life with Love Gives Freely

When the Lord created Adam, the Lord told Adam that he could eat freely of any tree in the garden.

The Lord God commanded the man, saying, “From any tree of the garden you may eat freely; Genesis 2:16

Love gives freely. A gift is something that is not worked for and there is nothing that you can do to earn it, but you must receive it. The Lord offered His love and provision to Adam. Adam lacked nothing when he lived in the garden that the Lord had created. The Lord offers His love to all the descendants of Adam and Eve. He again gives us the freedom to choose Him, for that is love, and He paid the price to give His love and He freely gives His gift of love to anyone who will ask Him. For God so loved He gave.

But God, being rich in mercy, because of His great love with which He loved us, even when we were dead in our transgressions, made us alive together with Christ (by grace you have been saved), and raised us up with Him, and seated us with Him in the heavenly places in Christ Jesus, so that in the ages to come He might show the surpassing riches of His grace in kindness toward us in Christ Jesus. For by grace you have been saved through faith; and that not of yourselves, it is the gift of God; not as a result of works, so that no one may boast. Ephesians 2:4-9

God, who is rich in mercy, because of His great love with which He loved us gave. He gave His best and His only begotten beloved Son so that we might be able to know Him and walk with Him in a loving relationship. The cross is the greatest expression of love. Salvation is a free gift for any who come to the Lord in faith and that gift of salvation comes through the price that someone else paid.

Freely you received, freely give. Matthew 10:8b

If we only understood the Lord’s love for us then we would realize how much He delights in giving to us. He not only gave up His only Son, but He says that He will freely give us all things. Wow!

He who did not spare His own Son, but delivered Him over for us all, how will He not also with Him freely give us all things? Romans 8:32

When we have the Spirit of the Lord living within us then we will know the things freely given to us by God.

Now we have received, not the spirit of the world, but the Spirit who is from God, so that we may know the things freely given to us by God,

I Corinthians 2:12

In love, God destined us to be His children. It was His plan all along and when Adam and Eve sinned then love found a way to restore us to Him. When you love someone then you want the relationship to be restored. You are not thinking how you want justice fulfilled, no, you are thinking of how can we be reconciled again. God sent His only begotten Son to die for the world because He loved the world. God was willing to take the punishment that we deserve so that we could be restored to Him. He fulfilled and satisfied the need for justice but it was because He loved us. Justice was fulfilled when Adam and Eve died but for them to live again and be restored to God, the Lord had to take their death so that they would never have to die again. He gave to man His righteousness and took man’s unrighteousness. Man owed a debt he could not pay and so God paid a debt that He did not owe. The debt was paid on the cross.

In love He predestined us to adoption as sons through Jesus Christ to Himself, according to the kind intention of His will, to the praise of the glory of His grace, which He freely bestowed on us in the Beloved. In Him we have redemption through His blood, the forgiveness of our trespasses, according to the riches of His grace which He lavished on us. Ephesians 1:4b-8a

The Lord has freely bestowed on us His grace, which is in Christ Jesus. The Lord has given freely to us and He wants us to give freely to others in need. We were the needy that Jesus came to love and He has also put the needy amongst us so that we will freely give to them as He has given to us. Jesus wants us to love others as He has loved us. He came to earth to love, not to judge.

For God did not send the Son into the world to judge the world, but that the world might be saved through Him. John 3:17

The Lord wants our faith to be a living faith. He wants us to live it out as He lived His faith out when He walked among men and women over two thousand years ago.

If a brother or sister is without clothing and in need of daily food, and one of you says to them, “Go in peace, be warmed and be filled,” and yet you do not give them what is necessary for their body, what use is that? Even so faith, if it has no works, is dead, being by itself. James 2:15-17

The Lord wants us to live out the love that He has put in our hearts when we came to know Him. The one who does not love does not know God, for God is love.

We know love by this, that He laid down His life for us; and we ought to lay down our lives for the brethren. But whoever has the world’s goods, and sees his brother in need and closes his heart against him, how does the love of God abide in him? Little children, let us not love with word or with tongue, but in deed and truth. I John 3:16-18

Freely you received, freely give.

A Life with Love that Is Patient

The Lord called Adam into a trustful and loving relationship and He wanted Adam to trust Him to meet his needs and to provide for Adam in His time. The Lord said that He would provide a helper suitable for Adam but it was not yet His timing. The Lord had something else for Adam to do before He brought along the one whom He had created for Adam.

Then the Lord God said, “It is not good for the man to be alone; I will make him a helper suitable for him.” Out of the ground the Lord God formed every beast of the field and every bird of the sky, and brought them to the man to see what he would call them; and whatever the man called a living creature, that was its name. The man gave names to all the cattle, and to the birds of the sky, and to every beast of the field, but for Adam there was not found a helper suitable for him. Genesis 2:18-20

There are three M’s in a man’s life and they need to be in a certain order. A young man must first choose who his Master will be. He must decide if the Lord God will be his Master and if he will follow and obey Him. After choosing his Master then a young man needs to find his mission in life. The Lord promises that those who choose Him will hear His voice so that they can follow Him. He will lead the young man into the calling or mission that He has designed the young man to fulfill. Then the Lord will bring into his life a mate who will be that “helper suitable” for him.

It is best for the man to “be asleep” and allow the Lord to bring him a wife rather than for the man to go looking for a wife. The Bible says that the “eyes of man are never satisfied” and if he allows his eyes to choose the “one” for him then she may not be the one that God has chosen and he will not be satisfied with her as time goes on.

Charm is deceitful and beauty is vain,
But a woman who fears the Lord, she shall be praised. Proverbs 31:30

If a young man allows the Lord to choose the wife for him then he will not be disappointed. He will be exhilarated with her love.

Be exhilarated always with her love. Proverbs 5:19b

Adam was thrilled with Eve and expressed his excitement when Eve was given to him. In the original language, the way Adam expressed was “WOW”!!

The man said,“This is now bone of my bones,
And flesh of my flesh;
She shall be called Woman,
Because she was taken out of Man.” Genesis 2:23