A Life with Love is Not Easily Angered

Anger is an emotion that can easily destroy love. Only a fool will allow anger to control him and it is best to not be angry at all.

Do not be eager in your heart to be angry, For anger resides in the bosom of fools. Ecclesiastes 7:9

A person who is slow to get angry is greater than the mighty. He who rules his spirit shows more power than he who captures a city.

He who is slow to anger is better than the mighty, And he who rules his spirit, than he who captures a city. Proverbs 16:32

Love is not easily angered because love and understanding sees the need in the other person rather than the desire in one’s own self to get angry.

He who is slow to anger has great understanding, But he who is quick-tempered exalts folly. Proverbs 14:29

The angry person does not realize that once they are over their anger the damage has been done in the spirit of the other ones who have seen it. Anger destroys intimacy in a marriage and a family because it puts fear in the one who is vulnerable. A wife is vulnerable to her husband and children are vulnerable to parents. Fear keeps the vulnerable one from opening up.

A man’s discretion makes him slow to anger, And it is his glory to overlook a transgression. Proverbs 19:11

It is a wise and discreet person who is slow to anger. It is a loving person who overlooks mistakes and shortcomings in others. It is love that covers a multitude of sins.

Above all, keep fervent in your love for one another, because love covers a multitude of sins. I Peter 4:8

A wise person is slow to anger and a prudent person conceals dishonor. A loving person is one who conceals dishonor in someone else. They will not seek to exalt themselves at the expense of someone else.

A fool’s anger is known at once, But a prudent man conceals dishonor. Proverbs 12:16

Anger pours gas on a potentially explosive situation whereas love pours water on a fire. A wise and loving person will learn to turn away from anger.

Scorners set a city aflame, But wise men turn away anger. Proverbs 29:8

Anger and wrath are related and so is fretting. Fretting is another word for being anxious and when we are anxious then it leads to evildoing. Doing evil is usually taking things into our own hands to deal with a situation and the outcome will not be good.

Rest in the Lord and wait patiently for Him;
Do not fret because of him who prospers in his way,
Because of the man who carries out wicked schemes.
Cease from anger and forsake wrath;
Do not fret; it leads only to evildoing.
For evildoers will be cut off,
But those who wait for the Lord, they will inherit the land.
Yet a little while and the wicked man will be no more;
And you will look carefully for his place and he will not be there.
But the humble will inherit the land
And will delight themselves in abundant prosperity. Psalm 37:7-11

The opposite of anger is to trust in the Lord, rest in Him and wait for Him. We can only do that if we know Him and know His love. If you do get angry with someone and say or do something that is not right then go to the person and ask their forgiveness for what you have done.

He who conceals his transgressions will not prosper, But he who confesses and forsakes them will find compassion. Proverbs 28:13

Don’t try to conceal your angry response by excusing or justifying what you have done or blaming someone else by saying they caused your anger. Maybe what they did was wrong but it does not excuse our response if it is not right. If we confess our sins to one another and forsake them then we will find compassion. Ask for prayer from another who has struggled and seen victory. All of us can relate to being angry but it does not justify us being that way.

Therefore, confess your sins to one another, and pray for one another so that you may be healed. James 5:16

My brethren, if any among you strays from the truth and one turns him back, let him know that he who turns a sinner from the error of his way will save his soul from death and will cover a multitude of sins. James 5:19,20

It is the soul of the angry person who dies when they get angry and say and do things that they regret. We need each other to help us in our struggles when we stray from the truth of God’s ways. Ask the Lord to help you find an older Christian who will pray for you and who you can talk with and confess your sins to so that they can turn you back to the Lord and His truth.

A Life with Love is Wise

True love will always act with wisdom. Love seeks only the best for the other and wisdom are the practical steps of action of what we need to do to get where we want to go. If we want a loving marriage then we need wisdom to know what we need to do so that our marriage will be filled with love. Most people know what they want but they do not know how to get there. Most people get married wanting for their marriage to be filled with love but too often the love fades and then the marriage dies.

A wise man will hear and increase in learning, And a man of understanding will acquire wise counsel, Proverbs 1:5

A wise person will always be learning in the ways of love. Wisdom and understanding often go together and the wise and understanding person will acquire as much wisdom and counsel that they can get. The fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom and knowledge of the Lord is understanding. The Lord is love and wisdom and He is the One who created man and woman and so He understands what each of us needs far more than we do. The more we know Him then the more we will understand how to love. Only a fool will try to do relationships on their own and especially marriage and family.

The fear of the Lord is the beginning of knowledge; Fools despise wisdom and instruction. Proverbs 1:7

Much of the grief in relationships begins with the tongue and what we say. Wisdom will teach you what to say and what not to say. You can never take back your words and much of our regrets have to do with what we said in the emotion of the moment.

The heart of the wise instructs his mouth Proverbs 16:23a

Your tongue can also bring much healing to your spouse. All of us have been hurt and disappointed in life and we bring that baggage into our marriages. There is nothing sweeter than for a spouse to know our hurts and pains and to love us through the difficult times.

…the tongue of the wise brings healing. Proverbs 12:18b

A home is meant to be a refuge from the storms of life. It is a taste of heaven to come home to a loving spouse. When you give love then you will receive love. Often where you are weak your spouse is strong and both of you will learn wisdom from each other on how to love. Loving is a learning process and we need to love in actions and words. Wisdom will teach us how to love in word and deed.

Little children, let us not love with word or with tongue, but in deed and truth. I John 3:18

If you feel a need for wisdom or you don’t know what to do in your marriage then ask God for wisdom. He promises that He will give wisdom to all who ask Him. God is the source of all wisdom and He will give you wisdom for what you need to do.

But if any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask of God, who gives to all generously and without reproach, and it will be given to him. James 1:5

With the Lord is wisdom and counsel. There is no counsel apart from Him. The person who seeks the Lord will find Him when they seek Him with all their heart. They will also discover wisdom and their life will be sweet and good. They will soar in life and their marriage and children will be blessed. If you miss the Lord you will have missed it for all eternity and there will be no end to their misery.

With Him are wisdom and might; To Him belong counsel and understanding. Job 12:13

There is much counsel contrary to the ways of God. You will not recognize the lies that permeate our world unless you know God’s ways and His truth. Good counsel will never go against what the Lord has said in His Word.

There is no wisdom and no understanding And no counsel against the Lord. Proverbs 21:30

Wisdom is more important than money and yet how much time is spent seeking wealth over wisdom. The most important things in life money can not buy and we lose them through a lack of wisdom. Once they are gone it is never the same. We value the love in our marriage, our families, our friends and the well being of our health, our emotions and minds, and yet money can not buy any of these but wisdom tells us what we need to discover and preserve them.

How much better it is to get wisdom than gold! And to get understanding is to be chosen above silver. Proverbs 16:16

He who gets wisdom loves his own soul.

He who gets wisdom loves his own soul; He who keeps understanding will find good. Proverbs 19:8

There is nothing that compares to wisdom. Wisdom is different from knowledge. Wisdom is the right application of knowledge. The Lord stores up wisdom for those who love Him. If you are wise then you are wise for yourself. If you neglect wisdom or do not seek it then you will be the one who suffers from the lack of wisdom.

If you are wise, you are wise for yourself, And if you scoff, you alone will bear it. Proverbs 9:12

When you find wisdom then you will be blessed and those who live under your influence will be blessed. Wisdom is more precious than jewels and all desirable things can not compare with wisdom. You will also discover knowledge, prudence, discernment, understanding and discretion.

“For wisdom is better than jewels;
And all desirable things cannot compare with her. “I, wisdom, dwell with prudence,
And I find knowledge and discretion. Proverbs 8:11,12

A Life with Love Is a Response

Love is a response to love. We can only love to the extent that we have known love. We can only know love through God since He is the source of love and God is love. When we love God then we will know the Lord and His love and we will be known by Him. It is then that we can love others with a God like love.

but if anyone loves God, he is known by Him. I Corinthians 8:3

God loves us and when we experience His great love for us then we want to love Him back. It is only when our hearts are evil that we do not want to love One who loves us so deeply and so sacrificially. The Lord is good and only does good towards us. The opposite of good is evil. One aspect of the meaning of good is the highest form of love and one of the meanings of evil is to cause grief. The Lord loves us and shows us good. We are the ones who bring Him grief and sadness by not loving Him and by rejecting His love for us. When we do not love God then we not only bring grief to God but we bring grief on ourselves. We also bring grief on those whom God has called us to love.

He who returns evil for good, Evil will not depart from his house. Proverbs 17:13

Since our hearts are evil we can not love God the way we need to so when we come to Him then He gives us a new heart to love Him. It is also this new heart that allows us to love others.

Moreover, I will give you a new heart and put a new spirit within you; and I will remove the heart of stone from your flesh and give you a heart of flesh. Ezekiel 36:26

If you are struggling with loving God and loving others then ask God for a new heart. It is not within ourselves to love God and love others.

Cast away from you all your transgressions which you have committed and make yourselves a new heart and a new spirit! Ezekiel 18:31a

Either we will love something else first or we will love God first. Whatever else it is that we love before God will be sin to us and will ultimately destroy us. The Lord wants us to cast our sins away from us so that we can love Him. When we love God and come to Him then He will bring healing to our lives and our relationships. He will heal us and restore us.

Woe to them, for they have strayed from Me!
Destruction is theirs, for they have rebelled against Me!
I would redeem them, but they speak lies against Me.
And they do not cry to Me from their heart

When they wail on their beds;
For the sake of grain and new wine they assemble themselves,
They turn away from Me.
Although I trained and strengthened their arms,
Yet they devise evil against Me.
They turn, but not upward,
They are like a deceitful bow; Hosea 7:13-16a

When we stray from the Lord the destruction follows. The Lord wants us to respond to His love and come to Him with all of our heart. He does not want us to just seek Him when we need something.

‘Call to Me and I will answer you, and I will tell you great and mighty things, which you do not know.’ Jeremiah 33:3

Love is a response to love. We can only respond to God’s love when we see it. He will show you His love. Call to Him. He will answer you. The Lord will meet you where you are. He will show you great and mighty things which you did not know. The Lord will bring healing to your broken heart, if your heart has been broken. He will show you His great love and restore your relationships. He will teach you how to find and keep love. He will give to you with an abundance of peace and truth. He will show you how to respond in love.

Behold, I will bring to it health and healing, and I will heal them; and I will reveal to them an abundance of peace and truth. Jeremiah 33:6

There is none like the Lord. He is the Only true God and He rides the heavens to our help. He is our dwelling place and underneath us are His everlasting arms.

“There is none like the God of Jeshurun, Who rides the heavens to your help,
And through the skies in His majesty.
“The eternal God is a dwelling place,
And underneath are the everlasting arms; Deuteronomy 33:26b,27a

God’s love never changes. He always loves us. The Lord keeps loving us and waits for us to come to Him and respond to Him once again. When we respond to Him then we will love Him by keeping His commandments. When we keep His commandments then we will experience His love and want to love Him more.

He who has My commandments and keeps them is the one who loves Me; and he who loves Me will be loved by My Father, and I will love him and will disclose Myself to him.” John 14:21

Jesus loved the Father and did exactly as the Father commanded Him. Jesus has asked us to do what He Himself did.

but so that the world may know that I love the Father, I do exactly as the Father commanded Me. John 14:31a

If we will keep His commandments then we will live in His love just as Jesus kept the Father’s commandments and lived in the Father’s love.

Jesus answered and said to him, “If anyone loves Me, he will keep My word; and My Father will love him, and We will come to him and make Our abode with him. John 14:23

A Life with Love is Met with Love

The plan from the beginning was that we were to be loved and we were to respond in love. This is still the plan and it is the plan for all relationships. Love seeks only the best for the other and has no selfish ambitions. When we are loved and love in return then we will be and do what we were created to be and do. God created us to be loved by Him and it was His desire that we respond with love for Him. However, love is a choice and in the beginning man chose not to love God.

They heard the sound of the Lord God walking in the garden in the cool of the day, and the man and his wife hid themselves from the presence of the Lord God among the trees of the garden. Then the Lord God called to the man, and said to him, “Where are you?” He said, “I heard the sound of You in the garden, and I was afraid because I was naked; so I hid myself.” And He said, “Who told you that you were naked? Have you eaten from the tree of which I commanded you not to eat?” Genesis 3:8-11

We hide ourselves from those whom we do not love. We will find reasons to be elsewhere. When two people are in love then they will find every reason to be together. They will make time to be together. When two people no longer love each other then they will find excuses to be elsewhere and hide from each other behind the excuses. When Adam and Eve hid they no longer loved God but God still loved them. God is faithful even when we are not.

If we are faithless, He remains faithful, for He cannot deny Himself. II Timothy 2:13

God’s design was that nothing could separate us from His love, that is, nothing can separate us from His love but our own selves. Love is a choice and we do not have to love God. We can try to hide ourselves from Him.

For I am convinced that neither death, nor life, nor angels, nor principalities, nor things present, nor things to come, nor powers, nor height, nor depth, nor any other created thing, will be able to separate us from the love of God, which is in Christ Jesus our Lord. Romans 8:38,39

We can try to hide from God and we can try to run from Him but we can never get away from His love for us.

Where can I go from Your Spirit?
Or where can I flee from Your presence?
If I ascend to heaven, You are there;

If I make my bed in Sheol, behold, You are there.
If I take the wings of the dawn,
If I dwell in the remotest part of the sea,
Even there Your hand will lead me,
And Your right hand will lay hold of me.
If I say, “Surely the darkness will overwhelm me,
And the light around me will be night,”
Even the darkness is not dark to You,
And the night is as bright as the day.
Darkness and light are alike to You. Psalm 139:7-12

There is no place that we can go to where He is not there. There is no place that we can hide that He dies not see. His love pursues us and He longs to love us.

Therefore the Lord longs to be gracious to you, And therefore He waits on high to have compassion on you. For the Lord is a God of justice; How blessed are all those who long for Him. Isaiah 30:18

He longs to be gracious to us and He is waiting for us to come to Him so that we can know his compassion and His love. How happy are all who come to Him. He meets us with His love.

A Life that Receives Their Heart’s Desires

The Lord has amazing promises for those who seek Him and delight themselves in Him. There is none to compare with Him for He delights in giving to His children. He knows our needs and that we need to learn to delight ourselves in Him first. If He is not our chief delight then the desires of our heart can easily become an idol in our lives. If our desires become an idol then something that could be good for us becomes a snare.

Psalm 37:4 Delight yourself in the Lord;
And He will give you the desires of your heart.

The Lord loves to give to us and He does not withhold from us what is good and what we need. As you learn to trust Him and walk with Him you will see that the dis-appointments in life are really His-appointments. He is wise and loving and when there is a disappointment then it means that there is something you don’t know and you need to trust Him. You don’t need to understand Him in everything but you need to trust Him in everything.

Psalm 84:10-12 For a day in Your courts is better than a thousand outside.
I would rather stand at the threshold of the house of my God
Than dwell in the tents of wickedness.
For the Lord God is a sun and shield;
The Lord gives grace and glory;
No good thing does He withhold from those who walk uprightly.
O Lord of hosts,
How blessed is the man who trusts in You!

When the Lord is your delight then you would rather stand at the threshold of the house of the Lord than to dwell in the tents of wickedness. There is no comparison to being with Him and in His presence. It truly is the fullness of joy.

Psalm 16:11 You will make known to me the path of life;
In Your presence is fullness of joy;
In Your right hand there are pleasures forever.

How do you learn to delight yourself in Him? There are a few principles that help you do this. First of all, if you will learn to love God’s Word then He will become your delight. How do you learn to love God’s Word? It is by spending time in it and seeking Him through his Word.

Jeremiah 15:16 Your words were found and I ate them,
And Your words became for me a joy and the delight of my heart;
For I have been called by Your name,
O Lord God of hosts.

If you will read and meditate on God’s Word then in time He will speak to you through your spirit. He will be very real to you and you will want to spend more time with Him. There is a wonderful cycle of the more time you spend in God’s Word then the more time you want to spend in His Word. He Himself will teach you and His Word becomes sweeter than honey to you.

Psalm 119:102,103 I have not turned aside from Your ordinances,
For You Yourself have taught me.
How sweet are Your words to my taste!
Yes, sweeter than honey to my mouth!

There is another wonderful principle that helps you take delight in the Lord. This principle is a precious truth found in His Word of keeping His day holy to Him. The Lord set aside one day a week as His day and He says that day is holy to Him.

Isaiah 58:13,14 “If because of the sabbath, you turn your foot
From doing your own pleasure on My holy day,
And call the sabbath a delight, the holy day of the Lord honorable,
And honor it, desisting from your own ways,
From seeking your own pleasure
And speaking your own word,
Then you will take delight in the Lord,
And I will make you ride on the heights of the earth;
And I will feed you with the heritage of Jacob your father,
For the mouth of the Lord has spoken.”

In the book of Revelation the Lord’s day is mentioned as Sunday, the day Jesus was resurrected.

Revelation 1:10a I was in the Spirit on the Lord’s day,

Since Sunday is usually the day that Christians get together to worship the Lord in community with each other then that is usually the day to honor the Lord in keeping His commandment of “keeping the Sabbath day holy”. Back in the days of the early church some people considered every day to be the Lord’s day and therefore holy and some people only considered one day to be the Lord’s day. Either way, if you want to learn to delight in Him, then this promise is for you if you will honor Him on His day.

Romans 14:5,6a One person regards one day above another, another regards every day alike. Each person must be fully convinced in his own mind. He who observes the day, observes it for the Lord,

When the Lord becomes your delight then He also will be the love of your life and you will grow more “in love” with Him as you see and hear His love a thousand times a day. All of life looks different when you are “in love” and you will find that you will want to talk about Him, as well as talk to Him more and more each day. Your life truly becomes an overflow of your love relationship with the Lord. Your longing will be for Him.

Isaiah 30:18 Therefore the Lord longs to be gracious to you,
And therefore He waits on high to have compassion on you.
For the Lord is a God of justice;
How blessed are all those who long for Him.

If you belong to Him then He wants you to “be longing” for Him. He, on His part, longs to be gracious to you. Long for Him and see what a blessed life it is when you do so.

A Life with Love Is Impossible

The sooner you realize that it is not in you and that you can not love on your own the easier your life will be. We are basically selfish and life is all about our own self. Everything revolves around “what is in it for me”. This begins the moment we are born and we really are not very happy about being in the real world until we are fed and cuddled and loved. Then, when circumstances change, we change again and we are not happy until we are fed, changed, cuddled and loved again and the cycle goes on and on. The older we get we try to disguise it but it is still in our heart that life is all about me.

that, in reference to your former manner of life, you lay aside the old self, which is being corrupted in accordance with the lusts of deceit, Ephesian 4:22

The only way we can love with an unselfish love is if we receive a new self which the Lord gives to us when we come to Him.

and put on the new self, which in the likeness of God has been created in righteousness and holiness of the truth. Ephesians 4:24

We become a new person in Christ and we are no longer the old self but a new person or a in other words, a new self.

Therefore if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creature; the old things passed away; behold, new things have come. II Corinthians 5:17

When we come to Jesus Christ and give Him our life then He gives Himself to us and takes our old self and gives us a new self. We then begin to live a life in Christ and through Christ. This new life is being transformed into the image of Christ, for He is God and the exact representation of who God is.

And He is the radiance of His glory and the exact representation of His nature, and upholds all things by the word of His power. When He had made purification of sins, He sat down at the right hand of the Majesty on high, Hebrews 1:3

When we come to Christ then we die to our old self with its selfish desires and we live for Christ through his power that works in us. We can not do His will but He can and wants to through us.

I have been crucified with Christ; and it is no longer I who live, but Christ lives in me; and the life which I now live in the flesh I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave Himself up for me. Galatians 2:20

We can do nothing apart from Jesus Christ but in Him we can do all things.

I can do all things through Him who strengthens me. Philippians 4:13

There is nothing that is impossible once we give our life to Jesus Christ. No matter what kind of mess you are in or how messed up your life or marriage is, the Lord can restore you and your relationships. First, you must be restored to Him and then He restores you and your life and relationships. The way that you are restored to God is to come to Him through Jesus Christ and give Him everything…your life, your relationships, your sins, your dreams, your future and anything else that comes to your mind. Basically, you are giving Him control of everything and you are asking Him to take your life and do whatever He wants with you.

For nothing will be impossible with God. Luke 1:37

Our impossibilities are possible with God. If you believe that then give Him the things that you are struggling with and the matters that have defeated you. We can not be and do all that we need to be and do but God can and He will if we come to Him.

But He said, “The things that are impossible with people are possible with God.” Luke 18:27

Even if you feel that your faith is little, still come to Him.

And He said to them, “Because of the littleness of your faith; for truly I say to you, if you have faith the size of a mustard seed, you will say to this mountain, ‘Move from here to there,’ and it will move; and nothing will be impossible to you. Matthew 17:20

There once was a man who Jesus wanted to help. His prayer is a famous prayer that the Lord heard. If this prayer expresses the desire of your heart then you might want to pray it also.

Immediately the boy’s father cried out and said, “I do believe; help my unbelief.” Mark 9:24

Loving someone else with a Christlike, unselfish love is impossible for all of us but it is not impossible for Christ because that is the the love that He has for all of us. He will give you His love for others. It is possible to have a great marriage and a great life but it is only possible through Jesus Christ.

But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control; against such things there is no law. Now those who belong to Christ Jesus have crucified the flesh with its passions and desires. Galatians 5:22-24

You will soar in life when Jesus Christ lives and loves through you in the power of His Spirit. The outcome will be love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self control. These qualities will characterize your marriage and your other relationships.

For the whole Law is fulfilled in one word, in the statement, “You shall love your neighbor as yourself.” But if you bite and devour one another, take care that you are not consumed by one another. Galatians 5:14,15

If you choose not to give yourself to the Lord and allow Him to live through you then the other outcome will be destruction. You will be destroyed and you will bring destruction to your marriage.

If you are wise, you are wise for yourself,
And if you scoff, you alone will bear it. Proverbs 9:12

Love is a choice and you must choose. If you choose the Lord and His ways then you will choose wisely and you will be blessed. To scoff means to ignore or turn your back to the truth and that is also a choice. You alone will bear it and the pain will be great.

A Life with Love Does Not Disappoint

Expectations destroy relationships because no one can meet up to another’s expectations. Expectations destroy relationships because when there are expectations then that becomes the focus and all the other wonderful things that can come in a loving relationship are not seen because the eyes are set on a certain set of expectations. Expectations bring disappointment. However, there is One who says that He will never disappoint. There is no one else who can make that promise.

For the Scripture says, “Whoever believes in Him will not be disappointed.” Romans 10:11

The Lord is all loving and all powerful and He keeps His Word. When we believe in Jesus Christ then He promises us that we will not be disappointed. Our spouses, our parents and every other human will eventually disappoint us. When we look to the Lord rather than to a person to meet our needs then we will not be let down. The Lord has poured out His love on us and that is what gives us hope and hope in Him does not disappoint.

and hope does not disappoint, because the love of God has been poured out within our hearts through the Holy Spirit who was given to us. Romans 5:5

When our hearts are filled with love then we are like a sponge that is full but if our hearts are empty of love then we are vulnerable to mistake what we think is love and end up being hurt and more empty. Only Jesus Christ can fill our hearts so that we won’t mistake the bitter for the sweet.

But to a famished man any bitter thing is sweet. Proverbs 27:7

Love is the greatest gift and the one who finds it and keeps it enjoys life and they are able to give love and bring joy to others. Love must first be found in the Lord. God’s love never disappoints and His love never changes. God’s love is perfect and when we live in His love then we no longer live in fear of rejection or fear of being disappointed.

There is no fear in love; but perfect love casts out fear, I John 4:18a

If we cry out to the Lord then He will deliver us from what troubles us. We can trust in Him and in His love. We will not be disappointed.

To You they cried out and were delivered; In You they trusted and were not disappointed. Psalm 22:5

There is no one person who can meet all of our needs. Those who end up being hurt the most are those who put their hopes in another human being to meet their needs. When hopes and expectations are not met then unhappiness and ungratefulness follows along with the disappointment. When we are disappointed with someone then the cup is half empty rather than half full. We will see what that person can not give us. This is especially true in marriage. Your spouse will never provide all of the money, intimacy, time, etc. that you desire. We will not see our spouse as a blessing and a gift but we will see what we don’t have. Marriage can be the sweetest relationship on earth but if one of them is unhappy then it can be the most miserable existence on earth. A husband especially will struggle if he has an unhappy wife. The most beautiful face to a husband is a smiling wife.

Thus says the Lord,
“Cursed is the man who trusts in mankind
And makes flesh his strength,
And whose heart turns away from the Lord.
“For he will be like a bush in the desert
And will not see when prosperity comes,
But will live in stony wastes in the wilderness,
A land of salt without inhabitant. Jeremiah 17:5,6

People are humans and so there are sometimes false hopes in them that lead to unrealistic expectations, which will always leave us empty and disappointed. When we look to a person to fill the needs and longings that only God can fill then we will end up being very lonely and living in an emotional land of emptiness. We will not see the prosperity that only the Lord can give to us.

“Blessed is the man who trusts in the Lord
And whose trust is the Lord.
“For he will be like a tree planted by the water,
That extends its roots by a stream
And will not fear when the heat comes;
But its leaves will be green,
And it will not be anxious in a year of drought
Nor cease to yield fruit. Jeremiah 17:7,8

The one whose trust is in the Lord will see their spouse as a gift and will know that their spouse can never meet all of their expectations and all of their needs. Their cup of joy will overflow as they thank the Lord for their spouse and the gift of marriage. As they give thanks to the Lord for who He has given to them then they will see even more wonderful things in their spouse. Life will be sweet for them and for the one whom they are married to. They will be blessed and their spouse and children will be blessed. Blessed is the person who trusts in the Lord.

A Life that Is Filled with Joy

Joy is what comes from the presence of the Lord and it is for those who know Jesus Christ as their personal Lord and Savior. Joy is different from happiness. Happiness has more to do with what is happening while the person who is filled with joy has something that transcends circumstances.

Psalm 16:9 You will make known to me the path of life;
In Your presence is fullness of joy;
In Your right hand there are pleasures forever.

Joy is connected to thanksgiving. It is a state of mind and heart of knowing that life is more than what is happening at any given moment. Joy is a gift that the Lord gives to His children through His Holy Spirit.

Galatians 5:22 But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness,

Joy can only come from the Lord and it is knowing that you are pleasing Him in your life and in your responses to life. It is a confirming from the Lord that you are in His will and doing what He delights in. When you are filled with joy it is almost as though you can feel His smile on your life. Your joy can be quenched through the old self, which is expressed in the flesh. The deeds of the flesh are not pleasing to the Lord so if you are involved in any of them then you will not have joy. The deeds of the flesh are evident when one is controlled by the flesh.

Galatians 5:19-21 Now the deeds of the flesh are evident, which are: immorality, impurity, sensuality, idolatry, sorcery, enmities, strife, jealousy, outbursts of anger, disputes, dissensions, factions, envying, drunkenness, carousing, and things like these, of which I forewarn you, just as I have forewarned you, that those who practice such things will not inherit the kingdom of God.

The nonChristian will use artificial means to try to be happy because they do not have the Spirit of God living within them. Artificial means, such as wine, drugs, etc., are very superficial and will not last but will only leave the one feeling more empty. When a Christian engages in any of these activities then they will quench the Holy Spirit who has come to live within them.

I Thessalonians 5:16-19 Rejoice always; pray without ceasing; in everything give thanks; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus. Do not quench the Spirit;

The way that a Christian can be continually filled with joy is to continually walk in the Spirit. Walking in the Spirit keeps the Christian from being controlled by the flesh and expressing the deeds of the flesh.

Galatians 5:16,17 But I say, walk by the Spirit, and you will not carry out the desire of the flesh. For the flesh sets its desire against the Spirit, and the Spirit against the flesh; for these are in opposition to one another, so that you may not do the things that you please.

We are to please the One who lived and died for us. When we live according to His ways then our hearts will be filled with the joy of the Lord and how sweet it is. You will also find that thanksgiving and joy go together. Your heart will also be filled with much gratitude. What a contrast to those who do not know the Lord and who are always complaining.

A Life with Love Does Not Hate

Love is an expression of everything that is good and hate is an expression of everything that is bad. If we love someone then we will do them good and build them up but if we hate someone then we will do what is bad towards them and will want to bring them grief. Love wants to be with someone and hate wants to do away with someone.

“You have heard that the ancients were told, ‘You shall not commit murder’ and ‘Whoever commits murder shall be liable to the court.’ But I say to you that everyone who is angry with his brother shall be guilty before the court; and whoever says to his brother, ‘You good-for-nothing,’ shall be guilty before the supreme court; and whoever says, ‘You fool,’ shall be guilty enough to go into the fiery hell. Matthew 5:21,22

Hate goes before abusive speech and actions and anger is the beginning of hate. Hate desires destruction to the one whom it is aimed towards but in actuality it destroys the one who has it within their heart. Cain hated Abel because God accepted Abel’s offering but not Cain’s offering.

Cain told Abel his brother. And it came about when they were in the field, that Cain rose up against Abel his brother and killed him. Genesis 4:8

The Lord did not tell anyone but Cain that He did not accept Cain’s sacrifice. The Lord does not shame but we bring about our own shame when we do not do life right. When we do wrong we can seek forgiveness from God or we can continue in our shame and receive more shame. Sin never stands alone. Sin brings more sin.

Then the Lord said to Cain, “Where is Abel your brother?” And he said, “I do not know. Am I my brother’s keeper?” Genesis 4:9

Abel knew where his brother was. A dead man does not move. If someone will kill they will lie. If someone will steal they will lie. If someone will commit adultery they will lie. Do not be in a relationship with a liar. If you hear them lie then flee from that relationship. The person who lies can not be trusted and the one who lies will lie to you.

He said, “What have you done? The voice of your brother’s blood is crying to Me from the ground. Genesis 4:10

The Lord asked Cain the same question that He asked Adam, “What have you done?”. Cain could not silence the dead nor could he do away with Abel. Whenever a person hates someone then they give the devil power over their lives. Whenever someone kills someone then they can not get away from the victim. They become a tormented person and the person whom they killed now lives within their thoughts. Hatred destroys the person who has it.

By faith Abel offered to God a better sacrifice than Cain, through which he obtained the testimony that he was righteous, God testifying about his gifts, and through faith, though he is dead, he still speaks. Hebrews 11:4

Cain was angry with God for not accepting his sacrifice. All anger is ultimately directed at God but it is taken out on someone else. Anger is not getting your way and what you want. Abel received what he wanted but Cain did not and so Cain killed Abel.

For this is the message which you have heard from the beginning, that we should love one another; not as Cain, who was of the evil one and slew his brother. And for what reason did he slay him? Because his deeds were evil, and his brother’s were righteous. I John 3:11,12

Love is of God and the message that has been from the beginning is that we should love one another. The violence that comes from anger is from the devil and when it is carried out then the perpetrator has done the works of the devil. Violence is different from other sins in that some of the other sins are natural desires that are fulfilled in the wrong way. It is wrong to commit adultery but physical intimacy is a natural desire that becomes adultery when it is accomplished between two people not married. The Lord hates violence.

The Lord tests the righteous and the wicked, And the one who loves violence His soul hates. Psalm 11:5

When the Lord comes into our lives then He sets us free from our own selfish desires which lead to the anger, hatred, jealousy, envy and all the other feelings and attitudes that can control us that leads to death within our souls. He takes out of our lives the things that destroy us and replaces them with what is good. He also will do this with relationships when they are given to the Lord.

We know that we have passed out of death into life, because we love the brethren. He who does not love abides in death. Everyone who hates his brother is a murderer; and you know that no murderer has eternal life abiding in him. We know love by this, that He laid down His life for us; and we ought to lay down our lives for the brethren. I John 3:14-16

Jesus Christ took our death, and all that dwells in death and causes death, to the cross that we might be set free. The anger, hatred, jealousy, strife and more are what characterizes the person who is still in death and separated from God. Love is what marks the person who has passed out of death into life. Jesus Christ died and rose again that He might bring us to God. He laid down His life for us.

For Christ also died for sins once for all, the just for the unjust, so that He might bring us to God, having been put to death in the flesh, but made alive in the spirit; I Peter 3:18

Abel loved God and Cain could not destroy Abel’s love for God nor could he silence Abel. Evil destroys the person who does it but God came to destroy the works of the devil.

The Son of God appeared for this purpose, to destroy the works of the devil. I John 3:8

The one who knows God will love others. The one who does not know God, their heart will have hatred. Those who love God will want to do what is right. Those who do not know God can not do what is right, for their hearts are wicked.

By this the children of God and the children of the devil are obvious: anyone who does not practice righteousness is not of God, nor the one who does not love his brother. I John 3:10

The Lord loves you whether you belong to Him or not. He wants you to come to Him. God loved Cain. Cain did not choose to love God. Love is a choice. God’s wisdom is a mystery. We do not fully understand it but when we do come to Jesus Christ our lives are changed now and forever.

Behold, I tell you a mystery; we will not all sleep, but we will all be changed, in a moment, in the twinkling of an eye, at the last trumpet; for the trumpet will sound, and the dead will be raised imperishable, and we will be changed. I Corinthians 15:51,52

The Lord says that if only those who crucified the Lord Jesus Christ had understood that He loved them then they would not have crucified Him. Jesus Christ loved even His enemies and those who hated Him.

but we speak God’s wisdom in a mystery, the hidden wisdom which God predestined before the ages to our glory; the wisdom which none of the rulers of this age has understood; for if they had understood it they would not have crucified the Lord of glory; but just as it is written,

“Things which eye has not seen and ear has not heard,
And which have not entered the heart of man,
All that God has prepared for those who love Him.” I Corinthians 2:7-9

His plan for man from the beginning has always been love. God has always loved man but God has also given man a choice. Man can respond to that love through Jesus Christ or they can reject that love. When they reject that love then their hearts continue to stay darkened and what is wrong starts to seem right and what is right seems wrong to them. Those who crucified Jesus Christ hated Him and believed that they could silence Him. God raised Him from the dead and He still desires that all people come to Him and receive eternal life.

“Truly, truly, I say to you, he who hears My word, and believes Him who sent Me, has eternal life, and does not come into judgment, but has passed out of death into life. John 5:24

There is no sin too great. We all are guilty of crucifying the Lord. It was for all of us and for all of our sin that He went to the cross. It is not too late to come to Him.

The Lord is not slow about His promise, as some count slowness, but is patient toward you, not wishing for any to perish but for all to come to repentance. II Peter 3:9

A Life with Love Does All Things Well

After Adam and Eve left the Garden of Eden then they began to do what the Lord had commanded them to do and that was to be fruitful and multiply.

God created man in His own image, in the image of God He created him; male and female He created them. God blessed them; and God said to them, “Be fruitful and multiply, Genesis 1:27,28a

First Cain was born Adam and Eve and then Abel was born. Both boys grew up into young men. Knowing that there was a God to be worshiped both of the young men sought to make an offering to the Lord. Cain was a tiller of the ground and Abel was a keeper of flocks.

Now the man had relations with his wife Eve, and she conceived and gave birth to Cain, and she said, “I have gotten a manchild with the help of the Lord.” Again, she gave birth to his brother Abel. And Abel was a keeper of flocks, but Cain was a tiller of the ground. Genesis 4:1-2

The Lord God does all things well and He wants to show us who He is and teach us His ways. When Jesus lived among men He did all things well.

They were utterly astonished, saying, “He has done all things well; He makes even the deaf to hear and the mute to speak.” Mark 7:37

After Adam and Eve sinned then they had to learn how to please God. The Lord wants us to seek Him first and to give Him our best. Cain offered a sacrifice to God in the course of time. It was when he was ready to seek the Lord. How easy it is for all of us to seek the Lord on our own terms and say such things as, “Some day I will give my life to the Lord” rather than to come to Him today when we hear Him speaking to our heart.

So it came about in the course of time that Cain brought an offering to the Lord of the fruit of the ground. Genesis 4:3

Abel, on the other hand, came to the Lord with his best. He offered the first and best of His work as an offering to the Lord. The Lord received His offering.

Abel, on his part also brought of the firstlings of his flock and of their fat portions. And the Lord had regard for Abel and for his offering; Genesis 4:4

The Lord did not receive Cain’s offering. It was not because He loved Abel more than Cain. The Lord loved both of them. The Bible does not say that God was mad at Cain but only that the Lord did not have regard for Cain’s offering.

but for Cain and for his offering He had no regard. Genesis 4:4a

The Lord loved Cain but Cain’s offering was not what God wanted. It is easy to become angry when our work or anything that we do is rejected. Giving into anger can give the devil an opportunity. Anger is an emotion that can easily lead to sin. Anger makes us vulnerable to the devil.

Be angry, and yet do not sin; do not let the sun go down on your anger, and do not give the devil an opportunity. Ephesians 4:26,27

Sometimes we learn more through rejection than we do through success. Our response to life often is more important than what happens to us in life. Our response determines the direction our life will go in. When we feel rejected by someone we were trying to please we can look to the Lord or we can become angry and try to justify ourselves.

Then the Lord said to Cain, “Why are you angry? And why has your countenance fallen? Genesis 4:6

When we become angry with someone then we close off our spirit to that person. Anger is an outward expression of hurt but it can easily lead to sin and bitterness. Sin and bitterness go together. Bitterness takes root in our lives through unresolved hurts and leads to immorality.

See to it that no one comes short of the grace of God; that no root of bitterness springing up causes trouble, and by it many be defiled; that there be no immoral or godless person like Esau, who sold his own birthright for a single meal. Hebrews 12:15,16

Immorality is exchanging the eternal for the temporal. The Lord wants to build eternal values into our lives and teach us what will last for eternity. Esau exchanged the blessing of God and what was eternal for what was of momentary value. All of sin is exchanging the eternal for the temporal satisfaction of the flesh.

If you do well, will not your countenance be lifted up? And if you do not do well, sin is crouching at the door; and its desire is for you, but you must master it.” Genesis 4: 7

Cain had not sinned when he did his offering. All we know was that the Lord did not have regard for his offering. Cain could still “do all things well” and the Lord would have been pleased with Cain. The Lord was instructing Cain in how to love God. The Lord loved Cain and wanted Cain to listen to Him so that Cain would know Him and please Him.

But everyone must be quick to hear, slow to speak and slow to anger; for the anger of man does not achieve the righteousness of God. James 1:19b,20

God is love and He is righteous and does all things well. The Lord says that if we will be quick to hear and be a doer of what He says then we also will be like Him and do all things well. His Word is the Law of liberty and they will set us free from the anger and bitterness that can so easily get a hold in our lives.

Therefore, putting aside all filthiness and all that remains of wickedness, in humility receive the word implanted, which is able to save your souls. But prove yourselves doers of the word, and not merely hearers who delude themselves. For if anyone is a hearer of the word and not a doer, he is like a man who looks at his natural face in a mirror; for once he has looked at himself and gone away, he has immediately forgotten what kind of person he was. But one who looks intently at the perfect law, the law of liberty, and abides by it, not having become a forgetful hearer but an effectual doer, this man will be blessed in what he does. James 1:21-25

When we feel rejected and respond rightly rather than in anger then it produces in us a humility. Humility is necessary to receive God’s instruction. It is our pride that allows anger to take hold of our emotions but if we will in humility receive His Words planted in our hearts then they will take root and bear the good fruit of becoming a doer of God’s Word. The Lord wants to bless us and gives us a promise that if we will do this then He will bless us in what we do. God will bless you in your relationship with Him. God will bless you in your job and in your marriage. He will bless you in all that you do.

How can a young man keep his way pure?
By keeping it according to Your word.
With all my heart I have sought You;
Do not let me wander from Your commandments.
Your word I have treasured in my heart,
That I may not sin against You.
Blessed are You, O Lord;
Teach me Your statutes. Psalm 119:9-12